The Drawing Of The Three Part 21

4.

Before the subway incident, Detta Walker had only been conscious a few times-these were like coral islands which look isolated to one above them but are, in fact, only nodes in the spine of a long archipelago which is mostly underwater. Odetta suspected Detta not at all, and Detta had no idea that there was such a person as Odetta... but Detta at least had a clear understanding that something something was wrong, that someone was f.u.c.king with her life. Odetta's imagination novelized all sorts of things which had happened when Detta was in charge of her body; Detta was not so clever. She was wrong, that someone was f.u.c.king with her life. Odetta's imagination novelized all sorts of things which had happened when Detta was in charge of her body; Detta was not so clever. She thought thought she remembered things, she remembered things, some some things, at least, but a lot of the time she didn't. things, at least, but a lot of the time she didn't.

Detta was at least partially aware of the blanks. blanks.

She could remember the china plate. She could remember that. She could remember slipping it into the pocket of her dress, looking over her shoulder all the while to make sure the Blue Woman wasn't there, peeking. She had to make sure because the china plate belonged to the Blue Woman. The china plate was, Detta understood in some vague way, a forspecial. forspecial. Detta took it for that why. Detta remembered taking it to a place she knew (although she didn't know how she knew) as The Drawers, a smoking trash-littered hole in the earth where she had once seen a burning baby with plastic skin. She remembered putting the plate carefully down on the gravelly ground and then starting to step on it and stopping, remembered taking off her plain cotton panties and putting them into the pocket where the plate had been, and then carefully slipping the first finger of her left hand carefully against the cut in her at the place where Old Stupid G.o.d had joined her and all other girlsandwomen imperfectly, but Detta took it for that why. Detta remembered taking it to a place she knew (although she didn't know how she knew) as The Drawers, a smoking trash-littered hole in the earth where she had once seen a burning baby with plastic skin. She remembered putting the plate carefully down on the gravelly ground and then starting to step on it and stopping, remembered taking off her plain cotton panties and putting them into the pocket where the plate had been, and then carefully slipping the first finger of her left hand carefully against the cut in her at the place where Old Stupid G.o.d had joined her and all other girlsandwomen imperfectly, but something something about that place must be right, because she remembered the jolt, remembered wanting to press, remembered not pressing, remembered how delicious her v.a.g.i.n.a had been naked, without the cotton panties in the way of it and the world, and she had not pressed, not until her shoe pressed, her black patent leather shoe, not until her shoe pressed down on the plate, about that place must be right, because she remembered the jolt, remembered wanting to press, remembered not pressing, remembered how delicious her v.a.g.i.n.a had been naked, without the cotton panties in the way of it and the world, and she had not pressed, not until her shoe pressed, her black patent leather shoe, not until her shoe pressed down on the plate, then then she pressed on the cut with her finger the way she was pressing on the Blue Woman's she pressed on the cut with her finger the way she was pressing on the Blue Woman's forspecial forspecial china plate with her foot, she remembered the way the black patent leather shoe covered the delicate blue webbing on the edge of the plate, she remembered the china plate with her foot, she remembered the way the black patent leather shoe covered the delicate blue webbing on the edge of the plate, she remembered the press, press, yes, she remembered pressing in The Drawers, pressing with finger and foot, remembered the delicious promise of finger and cut, remembered that when the plate snapped with a bitter brittle snap a similar brittle pleasure had skewered upward from that cut into her guts like an arrow, she remembered the cry which had broken from her lips, an unpleasant cawing like the sound of a crow scared up from a cornpatch, she could remember staring dully at the fragments of the plate and then taking the plain white cotton panties slowly out of her dress pocket and putting them on again, yes, she remembered pressing in The Drawers, pressing with finger and foot, remembered the delicious promise of finger and cut, remembered that when the plate snapped with a bitter brittle snap a similar brittle pleasure had skewered upward from that cut into her guts like an arrow, she remembered the cry which had broken from her lips, an unpleasant cawing like the sound of a crow scared up from a cornpatch, she could remember staring dully at the fragments of the plate and then taking the plain white cotton panties slowly out of her dress pocket and putting them on again, step-ins, step-ins, so she had heard them called in some time unhoused in memory and drifting loose like turves on a floodtide, so she had heard them called in some time unhoused in memory and drifting loose like turves on a floodtide, step-ins, step-ins, good, because first you stepped out to do your business and then you stepped back in, first one s.h.i.+ny patent leather shoe and then the other, good, panties were good, she could remember drawing them up her legs so clearly, drawing them past her knees, a scab on the left one almost ready to fall off and leave clean pink new babyskin, yes, she could remember so clearly it might not have been a week ago or yesterday but only one single moment ago, she could remember how the waistband had reached the hem of her party dress, the clear contrast of white cotton against brown skin, like cream, yes, like that, cream from a pitcher caught suspended over coffee, the texture, the panties disappearing under the hem of the dress, except then the dress was burnt orange and the panties were not going up but down but they were still white but not cotton, they were nylon, cheap see-through nylon panties, cheap in more ways than one, and she remembered stepping out of them, she remembered how they glimmered on the floormat of the '46 Dodge DeSoto, yes, how white they were, how cheap they were, not anything dignified like underwear but cheap panties, the girl was cheap and it was good to be cheap, good to be on sale, to be on the block not even like a wh.o.r.e but like a good breedsow; she remembered no round china plate but the round white face of a boy, some surprised drunk fraternity boy, he was no china plate but his face was as good, because first you stepped out to do your business and then you stepped back in, first one s.h.i.+ny patent leather shoe and then the other, good, panties were good, she could remember drawing them up her legs so clearly, drawing them past her knees, a scab on the left one almost ready to fall off and leave clean pink new babyskin, yes, she could remember so clearly it might not have been a week ago or yesterday but only one single moment ago, she could remember how the waistband had reached the hem of her party dress, the clear contrast of white cotton against brown skin, like cream, yes, like that, cream from a pitcher caught suspended over coffee, the texture, the panties disappearing under the hem of the dress, except then the dress was burnt orange and the panties were not going up but down but they were still white but not cotton, they were nylon, cheap see-through nylon panties, cheap in more ways than one, and she remembered stepping out of them, she remembered how they glimmered on the floormat of the '46 Dodge DeSoto, yes, how white they were, how cheap they were, not anything dignified like underwear but cheap panties, the girl was cheap and it was good to be cheap, good to be on sale, to be on the block not even like a wh.o.r.e but like a good breedsow; she remembered no round china plate but the round white face of a boy, some surprised drunk fraternity boy, he was no china plate but his face was as round round as the Blue Woman's china plate had been, and there was webbing on his cheeks, and this webbing looked as blue as the webbing on the Blue Woman's as the Blue Woman's china plate had been, and there was webbing on his cheeks, and this webbing looked as blue as the webbing on the Blue Woman's forspecial forspecial china plate had been, but that was only because the neon was red, the neon was garish, in the dark the neon from the roadhouse sign made the spreading blood from the places on his cheeks where she had clawed him china plate had been, but that was only because the neon was red, the neon was garish, in the dark the neon from the roadhouse sign made the spreading blood from the places on his cheeks where she had clawed him look look blue, and he had said blue, and he had said Why did you why did you why did you do, Why did you why did you why did you do, and then he unrolled the window so he could get his face outside to puke and she remembered hearing Dodie Stevens on the jukebox, singing about tan shoes with pink shoelaces and a big Panama with a purple hatband, she remembered the sound of his puking was like gravel in a cement mixer, and his p.e.n.i.s, which moments before had been a livid exclamation point rising from the tufted tangle of his pubic hair, was collapsing into a weak white question mark; she remembered the hoa.r.s.e gravel sounds of his vomiting stopped and then started again and she thought and then he unrolled the window so he could get his face outside to puke and she remembered hearing Dodie Stevens on the jukebox, singing about tan shoes with pink shoelaces and a big Panama with a purple hatband, she remembered the sound of his puking was like gravel in a cement mixer, and his p.e.n.i.s, which moments before had been a livid exclamation point rising from the tufted tangle of his pubic hair, was collapsing into a weak white question mark; she remembered the hoa.r.s.e gravel sounds of his vomiting stopped and then started again and she thought Well I guess he ain't made enough to lay Well I guess he ain't made enough to lay this this foundation yet foundation yet and laughing and pressing her finger (which now came equipped with a long shaped nail) against her v.a.g.i.n.a which was bare but no longer bare because it was overgrown with its own coa.r.s.e briared tangle, and there had been the same brittle breaking snap inside her, and it was still as much pain as it was pleasure (but better, far better, than nothing at all), and then he was grabbing blindly for her and saying in a hurt breaking tone and laughing and pressing her finger (which now came equipped with a long shaped nail) against her v.a.g.i.n.a which was bare but no longer bare because it was overgrown with its own coa.r.s.e briared tangle, and there had been the same brittle breaking snap inside her, and it was still as much pain as it was pleasure (but better, far better, than nothing at all), and then he was grabbing blindly for her and saying in a hurt breaking tone Oh you G.o.dd.a.m.ned n.i.g.g.e.r c.u.n.t Oh you G.o.dd.a.m.ned n.i.g.g.e.r c.u.n.t and she went on laughing just the same, dodging him easily and s.n.a.t.c.hing up her panties and opening the door on her side of the car, feeling the last blind thud of his fingers on the back of her blouse as she ran into a May night that was redolent of early honeysuckle, red-pink neon light stuttering off the gravel of some postwar parking lot, stuffing her panties, her cheap slick nylon panties not into the pocket of her dress but into a purse jumbled with a teenager's cheerful conglomeration of cosmetics, she was running, the light was stuttering, and then she was twenty-three and it was not panties but a rayon scarf, and she was casually slipping it into her purse as she walked along a counter in the Nice Notions section of Macy's-a scarf which sold at that time for $1.99. and she went on laughing just the same, dodging him easily and s.n.a.t.c.hing up her panties and opening the door on her side of the car, feeling the last blind thud of his fingers on the back of her blouse as she ran into a May night that was redolent of early honeysuckle, red-pink neon light stuttering off the gravel of some postwar parking lot, stuffing her panties, her cheap slick nylon panties not into the pocket of her dress but into a purse jumbled with a teenager's cheerful conglomeration of cosmetics, she was running, the light was stuttering, and then she was twenty-three and it was not panties but a rayon scarf, and she was casually slipping it into her purse as she walked along a counter in the Nice Notions section of Macy's-a scarf which sold at that time for $1.99.

Cheap.

Cheap like the white nylon panties.

Cheap.

Like her.

The body she inhabited was that of a woman who had inherited millions, but that was not known and didn't matter-the scarf was white, the edging blue, and there was that same little breaking sense of pleasure as she sat in the back seat of the taxi, and, oblivious of the driver, held the scarf in one hand, looking at it fixedly, while her other hand crept up under her tweed skirt and beneath the leg-band of her white panties, and that one long dark finger took care of the business that needed to be taken care of in a single merciless stroke.

So sometimes she wondered, in a distracted sort of way, where she was when she wasn't here, here, but mostly her needs were too sudden and pressing for any extended contemplation, and she simply fulfilled what needed to be fulfilled, did what needed to be done. but mostly her needs were too sudden and pressing for any extended contemplation, and she simply fulfilled what needed to be fulfilled, did what needed to be done.

Roland would have understood.

5.

Odetta could have taken a limo everywhere, even in 1959-although her father was still alive and she was not as fabulously rich as she would become when he died in 1962, the money held in trust for her had become hers on her twenty-fifth birthday, and she could do pretty much as she liked. But she cared very little for a phrase one of the conservative columnists had coined a year or two before-the phrase was "limousine liberal," and she was young enough not to want to be seen as one even if she really was was one. Not young enough (or stupid enough!) to believe that a few pairs of faded jeans and the khaki s.h.i.+rts she habitually wore in any real way changed her essential status, or riding the bus or the subway when she could have used the car (but she had been self-involved enough not to see Andrew's hurt and deep puzzlement; he liked her and thought it must be some sort of personal rejection), but young enough to still believe that gesture could sometimes overcome (or at least overset) truth. one. Not young enough (or stupid enough!) to believe that a few pairs of faded jeans and the khaki s.h.i.+rts she habitually wore in any real way changed her essential status, or riding the bus or the subway when she could have used the car (but she had been self-involved enough not to see Andrew's hurt and deep puzzlement; he liked her and thought it must be some sort of personal rejection), but young enough to still believe that gesture could sometimes overcome (or at least overset) truth.

On the night of August 19th, 1959, she paid for the gesture with half her legs... and half her mind.

6.

Odetta had been first tugged, then pulled, and finally caught up in the swell which would eventually turn into a tidal wave. In 1957, when she became involved, the thing which eventually became known as the Movement had no name. She knew some of the background, knew the struggle for equality had gone on not since the Emanc.i.p.ation Proclamation but almost since the first boatload of slaves had been brought to America (to Georgia, in fact, the colony the British founded to get rid of their criminals and debtors), but for Odetta it always seemed to begin in the same place, with the same three words: I'm not movin.

The place had been a city bus in Montgomery, Alabama, and the words had been spoken by a black woman named Rosa Lee Parks, and the place from which Rosa Lee Parks was not movin was from the front of the city bus to the back of the city bus, which was, of course, the Jim Crow part of the city bus. Much later, Odetta would sing "We Shall Not Be Moved" with the rest of them, and it always made her think of Rosa Lee Parks, and she never sang it without a sense of shame. It was so easy to sing we we with your arms linked to the arms of a whole crowd; that was easy even for a woman with no legs. So easy to sing we, so easy to with your arms linked to the arms of a whole crowd; that was easy even for a woman with no legs. So easy to sing we, so easy to be be we. There had been no we. There had been no we we on that bus, that bus that must have stank of ancient leather and years of cigar and cigarette smoke, that bus with the curved ad cards saying things like on that bus, that bus that must have stank of ancient leather and years of cigar and cigarette smoke, that bus with the curved ad cards saying things like LUCKY STRIKE L LUCKY STRIKE L.S.M.F.T. and ATTEND THE CHURCH OF YOUR CHOICE FOR HEAVEN ATTEND THE CHURCH OF YOUR CHOICE FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE and and DRINK OVALTINE DRINK OVALTINE! YOU YOU'LL SEE WHAT WE MEAN! and CHESTERFIELD CHESTERFIELD, TWENTY TWENTY-ONE GREAT TOBACCOS MAKE TWENTY WONDER- FUL SMOKES FUL SMOKES, no we we under the disbelieving gazes of the motorman, the white pa.s.sengers among whom she sat, the equally disbelieving stares of the blacks at the back. under the disbelieving gazes of the motorman, the white pa.s.sengers among whom she sat, the equally disbelieving stares of the blacks at the back.

No we. we.

No marching thousands.

Only Rosa Lee Parks starting a tidal wave with three words: I'm not movin. I'm not movin.

Odetta would think If I could do something like that-if I could be that brave-I think I could be happy for the rest of my life. But that sort of courage is not in me. If I could do something like that-if I could be that brave-I think I could be happy for the rest of my life. But that sort of courage is not in me.

She had read of the Parks incident, but with little interest at first. That came little by little. It was hard to say exactly when or how her imagination had been caught and fired by that at first almost soundless racequake which had begun to shake the south.

A year or so later a young man she was dating more or less regularly began taking her down to the Village, where some of the young (and mostly white) folk-singers who performed there had added some new and startling songs to their repertoire-suddenly, in addition to all those old wheezes about how John Henry had taken his hammer and outraced the new steam-hammer (killing himself in the process, lawd, lawd) and how Bar'bry Allen had cruelly rejected her lovesick young suitor (and ended up dying of shame, lawd, lawd), there were songs about how it felt to be down and out and ignored in the city, how it felt to be turned away from a job you could do because your skin was the wrong color, how it felt to be taken into a jail cell and whipped by Mr. Charlie because your skin was dark and you had dared, lawd, lawd, to sit in the white folks' section of the lunch-counter at an F. W. Woolworth's in Montgomery, Alabama.

Absurdly or not, it was only then that she had become curious about her own parents, and their their parents, and parents, and their their parents before them. She would never read parents before them. She would never read Roots Roots-she was in another world and time long before that book was written, perhaps even thought of, by Alex Haley, but it was at this absurdly late time in her life when it first dawned upon her that not so many generations back her progenitors had been taken in chains by white men. Surely the fact fact had occurred to her before, but only as a piece of information with no real temperature gradient, like an equation, never as something which bore intimately upon her own life. had occurred to her before, but only as a piece of information with no real temperature gradient, like an equation, never as something which bore intimately upon her own life.

Odetta totted up what she knew, and was appalled by the smallness of the sum. She knew her mother had been born in Odetta, Arkansas, the town for which she (the only child) had been named. She knew her father had been a small-town dentist who had invented and patented a capping process which had lain dormant and unremarked for ten years and which had then, suddenly, made him a moderately wealthy man. She knew that he had developed a number of other dental processes during the ten years before and the four years after the influx of wealth, most of them either orthodontic or cosmetic in nature, and that, shortly after moving to New York with his wife and daughter (who had been born four years after the original patent had been secured), he had founded a company called Holmes Dental Industries, which was now to teeth what Squibb was to antibiotics.

But when she asked him what life had been like during all the years between-the years when she hadn't been there, and the years when she had, her father wouldn't tell her. He would say all sorts of things, but he wouldn't tell tell her anything. He closed that part of himself off to her. Once her ma, Alice-he called her ma or sometimes Allie if he'd had a few or was feeling good-said, "Tell her about the time those men shot at you when you drove the Ford through the covered bridge, Dan," and he gave Odetta's ma such a gray and forbidding look that her ma, always something of a sparrow, had shrunk back in her seat and said no more. her anything. He closed that part of himself off to her. Once her ma, Alice-he called her ma or sometimes Allie if he'd had a few or was feeling good-said, "Tell her about the time those men shot at you when you drove the Ford through the covered bridge, Dan," and he gave Odetta's ma such a gray and forbidding look that her ma, always something of a sparrow, had shrunk back in her seat and said no more.

Odetta had tried her mother once or twice alone after that night, but to no avail. If she had tried before, she might have gotten something, but because he wouldn't speak, she wouldn't speak either-and to him, she realized, the past-those relatives, those red dirt roads, those stores, those dirt floor cabins with gla.s.sless windows ungraced by a single simple curtsey of a curtain, those incidents of hurt and hara.s.sment, those neighbor children who went dressed in smocks which had begun life as flour sacks-all of that was for him buried away like dead teeth beneath perfect blinding white caps. He would not speak, perhaps could could not, had perhaps willingly afflicted himself with a selective amnesia; the capped teeth was their life in the Greymarl Apartments on Central Park South. All else was hidden beneath that impervious outer cover. His past was so well-protected that there had been no gap to slide through, no way past that perfect capped barrier and into the throat of revelation. not, had perhaps willingly afflicted himself with a selective amnesia; the capped teeth was their life in the Greymarl Apartments on Central Park South. All else was hidden beneath that impervious outer cover. His past was so well-protected that there had been no gap to slide through, no way past that perfect capped barrier and into the throat of revelation.

Detta knew things, but Detta didn't know Odetta and Odetta didn't know Detta, and so the teeth lay as smooth and closed as a redan gate there, also. knew things, but Detta didn't know Odetta and Odetta didn't know Detta, and so the teeth lay as smooth and closed as a redan gate there, also.

She had some of her mother's shyness in her as well as her father's unblinking (if unspoken) toughness, and the only time she had dared pursue him further on the subject, to suggest that what he was denying her was a deserved trust fund never promised and apparently never to mature, had been one night in his library. He had shaken his Wall Street Journal Wall Street Journal carefully, closed it, folded it, and laid it aside on the deal table beside the standing lamp. He had removed his rimless steel spectacles and had laid them on top of the paper. Then he had looked at her, a thin black man, thin almost to the point of emaciation, tightly kinked gray hair now drawing rapidly away from the deepening hollows of his temples where tender clocksprings of veins pulsed steadily, and he had said only, carefully, closed it, folded it, and laid it aside on the deal table beside the standing lamp. He had removed his rimless steel spectacles and had laid them on top of the paper. Then he had looked at her, a thin black man, thin almost to the point of emaciation, tightly kinked gray hair now drawing rapidly away from the deepening hollows of his temples where tender clocksprings of veins pulsed steadily, and he had said only, I don't talk about that part of my life, Odetta, or think about it. It would be pointless. The world has moved on since then. I don't talk about that part of my life, Odetta, or think about it. It would be pointless. The world has moved on since then.

Roland would have understood.

7.

When Roland opened the door with the words THE LADY OF THE SHAD THE LADY OF THE SHAD- OWS OWS written upon it, he saw things he did not understand at all-but he understood they didn't matter. written upon it, he saw things he did not understand at all-but he understood they didn't matter.

It was Eddie Dean's world, but beyond that it was only a confusion of lights, people and objects-more objects than he had ever seen in his life. Lady-things, from the look of them, and apparently for sale. Some under gla.s.s, some arranged in tempting piles and displays. None of it mattered any more than the movement as that world flowed past the edges of the doorway before them. The doorway was the Lady's eyes. He was looking through them just as he had looked through Eddie's eyes when Eddie had moved up the aisle of the sky-carriage.

Eddie, on the other hand, was thunderstruck. The revolver in his hand trembled and dropped a little. The gunslinger could have taken it from him easily but did not. He only stood quietly. It was a trick he had learned a long time ago.

Now the view through the doorway made one of those turns the gunslinger found so dizzying-but Eddie found this same abrupt swoop oddly comforting. Roland had never seen a movie. Eddie had seen thousands, and what he was looking at was like one of those moving point-of-view shots they did in ones like Halloween Halloween and and The s.h.i.+ning. The s.h.i.+ning. He even knew what they called the gadget they did it with. Steadicam. That was it. He even knew what they called the gadget they did it with. Steadicam. That was it.

"Star Wars, too," he muttered. "Death Star. That f.u.c.kin crack, remember?" too," he muttered. "Death Star. That f.u.c.kin crack, remember?"

Roland looked at him and said nothing.

Hands-dark brown hands-entered what Roland saw as a doorway and what Eddie was already starting to think of as some sort of magic movie screen... a movie screen which, under the right circ.u.mstances, you might be able to walk into the way that guy had just walked out out of the screen and into the real world in of the screen and into the real world in The Purple Rose of Cairo. The Purple Rose of Cairo. b.i.t.c.hin movie. b.i.t.c.hin movie.

Eddie hadn't realized how b.i.t.c.hin until just now.

Except that movie hadn't been made yet on the other side of the door he was looking through. It was New York, okay-somehow the very sound of the taxi-cab horns, as mute and faint as they were-proclaimed that-and it was some New York department store he had been in at one time or another, but it was... was...

"It's older," he muttered.

"Before your when?" the gunslinger asked.

Eddie looked at him and laughed shortly. "Yeah. If you want to put it that way, yeah."

"h.e.l.lo, Miss Walker," a tentative voice said. The view in the doorway rose so suddenly that even Eddie was a bit dizzied and he saw a saleswoman who obviously knew the owner of the black hands-knew her and either didn't like her or feared her. Or both. "Help you today?"

"This one." The owner of the black hands held up a white scarf with a bright blue edge. "Don't bother to wrap it up, babe, just stick it in a bag."

"Cash or ch-"

"Cash, it's always cash, isn't it?"

"Yes, that's fine, Miss Walker."

"I'm so glad you approve, dear."

There was a little grimace on the salesgirl's face-Eddie just caught it as she turned away. Maybe it was something as simple as being talked to that way by a woman the salesgirl considered an "uppity n.i.g.g.e.r" (again it was more his experience in movie theaters than any knowledge of history or even life on the streets as he had lived it that caused this thought, because this was like watching a movie either set or made in the '60s, something like that one with Sidney Steiger and Rod Poitier, In the Heat of the Night In the Heat of the Night), but it could also be something even simpler: Roland's Lady of the Shadows was, black or white, one rude b.i.t.c.h.

And it didn't really matter, did it? None of it made a d.a.m.ned bit of difference. He cared about one thing and one thing only and that was getting the f.u.c.k out. out.

That was New York, he could almost smell smell New York. New York.

And New York meant smack.

He could almost smell that, too.

Except there was a hitch, wasn't there?

One big motherf.u.c.ker of a hitch.

8.

Roland watched Eddie carefully, and although he could have killed him six times over at almost any time he wanted, he had elected to remain still and silent and let Eddie work the situation out for himself. Eddie was a lot of things, and a lot of them were not nice (as a fellow who had consciously let a child drop to his death, the gunslinger knew the difference between nice and not quite well), but one thing Eddie wasn't was stupid.

He was a smart kid.

He would figure it out.

So he did.

He looked back at Roland, smiled without showing his teeth, twirled the gunslinger's revolver once on his finger, clumsily, burlesquing a show-shooter's fancy coda, and then he held it out to Roland, b.u.t.t first.

"This thing might as well be a piece of s.h.i.+t for all the good it can do me, isn't that right?"

You can talk bright when you want to, Roland thought. Roland thought. Why do you so often choose to talk stupid, Eddie? Is it because you think that's the way they talked in the place where your brother went with his guns? Why do you so often choose to talk stupid, Eddie? Is it because you think that's the way they talked in the place where your brother went with his guns?

"Isn't that right?" Eddie repeated.

Roland nodded.

"If I had had plugged you, what would have happened to that door?" plugged you, what would have happened to that door?"

"I don't know. I suppose the only way to find out would be to try it and see."

"Well, what do you think think would happen?" would happen?"

"I think it would disappear."

Eddie nodded. That was what he thought, too. Poof! Gone like magic! Now ya see it, my friends, now ya don't. It was really no different than what would happen if the projectionist in a movie-theater were to draw a six-shooter and plug the projector, was it?

If you shot the projector, the movie stopped.

Eddie didn't want the picture to stop.

Eddie wanted his money's worth.

"You can go through by yourself," Eddie said slowly.

"Yes."

"Sort of."

"Yes."

"You wind up in her head. Like you wound up in mine."

"Yes."

"So you can hitchhike into my world, but that's all."

Roland said nothing. Hitchhike Hitchhike was one of the words Eddie sometimes used that he didn't exactly understand... but he caught the drift. was one of the words Eddie sometimes used that he didn't exactly understand... but he caught the drift.

"But you could could go through in your body. Like at Balazar's." He was talking out loud but really talking to himself. "Except you'd need me for that, wouldn't you?" go through in your body. Like at Balazar's." He was talking out loud but really talking to himself. "Except you'd need me for that, wouldn't you?"

"Yes."

"Then take me with you."