Septimus Heap_ Magyk Part 36

Sarah reached out and placed her hand on Septimus's red hat.

"Would you mind if I took this off?" she asked.

Boy 412 shook his head. That's what mothers were for. To fiddle about with your hat.

Gently, Sarah lifted off Boy 412's hat for the first time since Marcia had crammed it onto his head at Sally Mullin's bunkhouse. Straw-colored tufts of curly hair sprang up as Septimus shook his head like a dog shaking off water and a boy shaking off his old life, his old fears and his old name.

He was becoming who he really was.

Septimus Heap.

WHAT A AUNT Z ZELDA S SAW IN THE D DUCK P POND.

We are back in the Young Army nursery.

In the semidarkness of the nursery the Matron Midwife puts the baby Septimus in a cot and sits down wearily. She keeps glancing anxiously at the door as if waiting for someone to come in. No one appears.

A minute or two later she heaves herself up from her chair and goes over to the cot where her own baby is crying and picks the child up. At that moment the door is flung open, and the Matron Midwife wheels around, white-faced, frightened.

A tall woman in black stands in the doorway. Over her black, well-pressed robes she wears the starched white ap.r.o.n of a nurse, but around her waist is a bloodred belt showing the three black stars of DomDaniel.

She has come for Septimus Heap.

The Nurse is late. She got lost on her way to the nursery, and now she is fl.u.s.tered and afraid. DomDaniel does not tolerate lateness. She sees the Matron Midwife with a baby, just as she has been told she would. She does not know that the Matron Midwife is holding her own child in her arms and that Septimus Heap is asleep in a cot in the dim shadows of the nursery. The Nurse runs over to the Midwife and seizes the baby from her. The Midwife protests. She tries to wrest her baby back from the Nurse, but her desperation is more than matched by the Nurse's determination to make it back to the boat in time for the tide.

The taller, younger Nurse wins. She bundles up the baby in a long red cloth emblazoned with three black stars and runs out, pursued by the screaming Midwife who now knows exactly how Sarah Heap felt only a few hours ago. The Midwife is forced to give up her chase at the barracks door where the Nurse, flaunting her three black stars, has the Matron Midwife arrested by the guard, and disappears into the night, triumphantly carrying off the Midwife's own child to DomDaniel.

Back in the nursery the old woman who is meant to be babysitting wakes up. Coughing and wheezing, she gets up and makes up four nighttime bottles for her charges. One each for the triplets-Boys 409, 410 and 411-and one for the newest recruit to the Young Army, twelve-hours-old Septimus Heap, destined to be known for the next ten years as Boy 412.

Aunt Zelda sighed. This was as she had expected. Next she asked the moon to follow the Midwife's child. There was something else she needed to know.

The Nurse just makes it back to the boat in time. A Thing Thing stands at the stern of the boat and sculls her across the river using the old fishermen's way with just one oar. On the other side she is met by a stands at the stern of the boat and sculls her across the river using the old fishermen's way with just one oar. On the other side she is met by a Darke Darke horseman, riding a huge black horse. He pulls the Nurse and the child up behind him and canters off into the night. They have a long and uncomfortable ride ahead of them. horseman, riding a huge black horse. He pulls the Nurse and the child up behind him and canters off into the night. They have a long and uncomfortable ride ahead of them.

By the time they reach DomDaniel's lair high up in the old slate quarries of the Badlands, the Midwife's baby is screaming and the Nurse has a terrible headache. DomDaniel is waiting to see his prize, which he takes to be Septimus Heap, the seventh son of a seventh son. The Apprentice that every Wizard and every Necromancer Necromancer dreams of. The Apprentice who will give him the power to return him to the Castle and take back what is rightfully his. dreams of. The Apprentice who will give him the power to return him to the Castle and take back what is rightfully his.

He looks at the screaming baby with distaste. The screams make his head ache and his ears ring. It is a big baby for a newborn, thinks DomDaniel, and an ugly one too. He doesn't like it very much. The Necromancer Necromancer has an air of disappointment about him as he tells the Nurse to take the baby away. has an air of disappointment about him as he tells the Nurse to take the baby away.

The Nurse puts the baby in the waiting cot and goes to bed. She feels too ill to get up the next day, and no one bothers to feed the Midwife's son until well into the next night. There is no Apprentice Supper for this this Apprentice. Apprentice.

Aunt Zelda sat by the duck pond and smiled. The Apprentice is free of his Darke Darke Master. Septimus Heap is alive, and has found his family. The Princess is safe. She remembered something Marcia often said: things Master. Septimus Heap is alive, and has found his family. The Princess is safe. She remembered something Marcia often said: things do do have a habit of working out. Eventually. have a habit of working out. Eventually.

AFTER...

Whatever happened to...

GRINGE, THE GATEKEEPER.

Gringe remained the North Gate Gatekeeper throughout all the upheavals at the Castle. Although he would rather have jumped into a vat of boiling oil than admit it, Gringe loved his job, and it gave his family a secure home in the gatehouse after many years of living rough under the Castle walls. The day that Marcia had given him a half crown turned out to be an important day for Gringe. That day, for the first and only time ever, Gringe kept some of the bridge money-Marcia's half crown, to be exact. There was something about the thick, solid silver disk lying warm and heavy in the palm of his hand that made Gringe reluctant to put it into the toll box. So he slipped it into his pocket, telling himself he would add it to the day's takings that night. But Gringe could not bring himself to part with the half crown. And so the half crown sat in his pocket for many months until Gringe began to consider it his own.

And there the half crown would have stayed had it not been for a notice Gringe found nailed up on the North Gate one cold morning almost a year later:

YOUNG ARMY CONSCRIPTION EDICT.

ALL BOYS AGED ELEVEN TO SIXTEEN.

YEARS WHO ARE NOT APPRENTICED TO.

A RECOGNIZED TRADE ARE TO REPORT.

TO THE YOUNG ARMY BARRACKS.

AT 0600 0600 HOURS TOMORROW HOURS TOMORROW.

Gringe felt sick. His son, Rupert, had celebrated his eleventh birthday the previous day. Mrs. Gringe was hysterical when she saw the notice. Gringe felt hysterical too, but when he saw Rupert, white-faced, reading the notice, he decided he had to stay calm. He shoved his hands in his pockets and thought. And when, out of habit, his hand closed around Marcia's half crown, Gringe knew he had the answer.

As soon as the boatyard was open that morning, they had a new apprentice: Rupert Gringe, whose father had just secured a seven-year apprentices.h.i.+p with Jannit Maarten, a herring-boat builder, for the substantial down payment of a half crown.

THE MATRON MIDWIFE.

After the Matron Midwife was arrested, she was taken to the Castle Asylum for Deluded and Distressed Persons due to her distraught state of mind and preoccupation with baby-s.n.a.t.c.hing, which was not considered to be a healthy preoccupation for a Midwife to have. After spending a few years there she was allowed to leave because the Asylum was becoming overcrowded. There had been a huge increase in deluded and distressed people since the Supreme Custodian had taken over the Castle, and the Matron Midwife was now neither deluded nor distressed enough to merit a place. And so Agnes Meredith, former Matron Midwife, now unemployed bag lady, packed her many bags and set off to search for her lost son, Merrin.

THE NIGHT SERVANT.

The Supreme Custodian's Night Servant was thrown into a dungeon after dropping the Crown and adding another dent to it. He was released a week later by mistake and went to work in the Palace kitchens as an undercook peeling potatoes, which he was good at, and soon progressed to be chief potato-peeler. He enjoyed his job. No one minded if he dropped a potato.

JUDGE ALICE NETTLES.

Alice Nettles first met Alther Mella when she was a trainee advocate at the Castle Court. Alther had yet to become DomDaniel's Apprentice, but Alice could tell that Alther was special. Even after Alther became the ExtraOrdinary Wizard and was much talked about as "that awful Apprentice who pushed his Master from the Tower," Alice kept seeing him. She knew that Alther was incapable of killing anything, even an irritating ant. Shortly after Alther became ExtraOrdinary Wizard, Alice achieved her ambition of becoming a judge. Soon their separate careers began to keep Alther and Alice increasingly busy, and they never saw as much of each other as they would have liked to, something that Alice always regretted.

It was a terrible double blow to Alice when, in the s.p.a.ce of a few days, the Custodians not only killed the dearest friend she had ever had but also took away her life's work when they banned women from the Courthouse. Alice left the Castle and went to stay with her brother in the Port. After some time she recovered enough from Alther's death to take a job as legal advisor to the Customs House.

It was after a long day dealing with a tricky problem involving a smuggled camel and a traveling circus that Alice repaired to the Blue Anchor Tavern before she returned to her brother's house. It was there, to her delight, that she finally met the ghost of Alther Mella.

THE a.s.sa.s.sIN.

The a.s.sa.s.sin suffered complete memory loss after being hit by Marcia's Thunderflash Thunderflash. She was also quite badly burned. When the Hunter had collected the pistol from the a.s.sa.s.sin, he had left her lying where he found her, unconscious on Marcia's carpet. DomDaniel had had her thrown out into the snow, but she was found by the night street sweepers and taken to the Nuns' Hospice. She eventually recovered and stayed on at the Hospice, working as a helper. Luckily for her, her memory never returned.

LINDA LANE.

Linda Lane was given a new ident.i.ty and moved into some luxurious rooms overlooking the river to reward her for finding the Princess. However, some months later she was recognized by the family of one of her previous victims, and late one night as she sat on her balcony with a gla.s.s of her favorite wine supplied by the Supreme Custodian, Linda Lane was pushed off and fell into the fast-flowing river. She was never found.

THE YOUNGEST KITCHEN MAID.

After the youngest Kitchen Maid started having nightmares about wolves, her sleep became so badly disturbed that she often fell asleep at work. One day she dozed off while she was meant to be turning the spit and a whole sheep went up in flames; it was only the prompt action of the chief potato-peeler that saved her from the same fate as the sheep. The youngest Kitchen Maid was demoted to a.s.sistant potato-peeler, but three weeks later she ran away with the chief potato-peeler to start a better life in the Port.

THE FIVE NORTHERN TRADERS.

After their hurried exit from Sally Mullin's Tea and Ale House, the five Northern Traders spent the night on their s.h.i.+p, stowing away their wares and preparing to leave on the early morning high tide. They had been caught up in unpleasant changes of government before and had no wish to stay around and see what happened this time. In the Traders' experience it was always a nasty business. As they sailed past the smoldering remains of Sally Mullin's Tea and Ale House the next morning, they knew they were right. But they gave little thought to Sally as they set off down the river, planning their voyage south to escape the Big Freeze and looking forward to the warmer climes of the Far Countries. The Northern Traders had seen it all before, and did not doubt they would see it all again.

THE WAs.h.i.+NG-UP BOY.

The Was.h.i.+ng-up Boy employed by Sally Mullin was convinced that it was his fault the Tea and Ale House burned down. He was sure he must have left the tea towels drying too close to the fire just as he had done before. But he was not one to let these things trouble him for long. The Was.h.i.+ng-Up Boy believed that every setback was an opportunity in disguise. And so he built a small hut on wheels and every day he trundled it down to the Custodian Guard barracks and sold meat pies and sausages to the Guards. The contents of his pies and sausages varied and depended on what the Was.h.i.+ng-up Boy could get hold of, but he worked hard, making the pies late into the night, and did a brisk trade all day. If people began to notice that their cats and dogs were disappearing at an alarming rate, no one thought to link it with the sudden appearance of the Was.h.i.+ng-up Boy's meat pie hut. And, when the ranks of the Custodian Guards were devastated by food poisoning, it was the barracks' Canteen Cook who was blamed. The Was.h.i.+ng-up Boy prospered and never, ever, ate one of his own meat pies or sausages.

RUPERT GRINGE.

Rupert Gringe was the best apprentice Jannit Maarten had ever had. Jannit built shallow-draught herring boats, which could fish the waters near the sh.o.r.e and trap the shoals of herring by running them up against the sand banks just outside the Port. Any herring fisherman in possession of a Jannit Maarten boat was sure of a good living, and it soon became known that if Rupert Gringe had worked on the boat, you were lucky-the boat would sit well in the water and run fast with the wind. Jannit recognized talent when she saw it, and she soon trusted Rupert to work on his own. The first boat Rupert built entirely by himself was Muriel Muriel. He painted her a dark green like the depths of the river and gave her deep red sails like the late summer sunsets over the sea.

LUCY GRINGE.

Lucy Gringe had met Simon Heap at a dance cla.s.s for young ladies and gentlemen when they were both fourteen. Mrs. Gringe had sent Lucy along to keep her out of trouble for the summer. (Simon had gone to the cla.s.s by mistake. Silas, who had some trouble with reading and often got his letters mixed up, had thought it was a Trance Trance cla.s.s and had made the mistake of mentioning it to Sarah one evening. Simon overheard, and after much pestering, Silas had enrolled him in the cla.s.s.) cla.s.s and had made the mistake of mentioning it to Sarah one evening. Simon overheard, and after much pestering, Silas had enrolled him in the cla.s.s.) Lucy loved the way Simon was determined to be the best dancer in the cla.s.s, just as Simon was always determined to be the best at everything. And she liked his green Wizard eyes and his curly blond hair too. Simon had no idea why he liked a girl girl all of a sudden, but for some reason he found he could not stop thinking about Lucy. Lucy and Simon continued to see each other whenever they could, but kept their meetings secret. They knew neither of their families would approve. all of a sudden, but for some reason he found he could not stop thinking about Lucy. Lucy and Simon continued to see each other whenever they could, but kept their meetings secret. They knew neither of their families would approve.

The day Lucy ran away to get married to Simon Heap was the best and worst day of her life. It was the best day right up until the Guards burst into the Chapel and took him away. After that Lucy didn't care what happened to her. Gringe came and took her home. He locked her up at the top of the gatehouse tower to stop her running away and begged her to forget about Simon Heap. Lucy refused and would not speak to her father at all. Gringe was heartbroken. He had only done what he thought best for his daughter.

JENNA'S s.h.i.+ELD BUG When the ex-millipede fell off DomDaniel it bounced and ended up on top of a barrel. The barrel was washed overboard as the Vengeance Vengeance was pulled down into the Quake Ooze. It floated off to the Port where it fetched up on the town beach. The s.h.i.+eld Bug dried out its wings and flew off to a nearby field where a traveling circus had just arrived. For some reason it took a particular dislike to an inoffensive buffoon, and it caused great amus.e.m.e.nt to the audience every night as the bug chased the buffoon around the ring. was pulled down into the Quake Ooze. It floated off to the Port where it fetched up on the town beach. The s.h.i.+eld Bug dried out its wings and flew off to a nearby field where a traveling circus had just arrived. For some reason it took a particular dislike to an inoffensive buffoon, and it caused great amus.e.m.e.nt to the audience every night as the bug chased the buffoon around the ring.

THE SWIMMERS AND THE CHICKEN BOAT.

The two swimmers who were thrown from the Vengeance Vengeance were lucky to survive. Jake and Barry Parfitt, whose mother had insisted on teaching them to swim before they became seafarers, were not particularly strong swimmers, and it was all they could do to keep their heads above water as the storm raged around them. They were beginning to give up hope when Barry saw a fis.h.i.+ng boat coming toward them. Although there appeared to be no one on board the fis.h.i.+ng boat, there was an unusual gangplank hanging down from the deck. With their last ounce of strength Jake and Barry pulled themselves up onto the gangplank and collapsed onto the deck, where they found themselves surrounded by chickens. But they didn't care what they were surrounded by as long as it wasn't water. were lucky to survive. Jake and Barry Parfitt, whose mother had insisted on teaching them to swim before they became seafarers, were not particularly strong swimmers, and it was all they could do to keep their heads above water as the storm raged around them. They were beginning to give up hope when Barry saw a fis.h.i.+ng boat coming toward them. Although there appeared to be no one on board the fis.h.i.+ng boat, there was an unusual gangplank hanging down from the deck. With their last ounce of strength Jake and Barry pulled themselves up onto the gangplank and collapsed onto the deck, where they found themselves surrounded by chickens. But they didn't care what they were surrounded by as long as it wasn't water.

When the waters eventually ebbed from the Marram Marshes, Jake, Barry and the chickens came to rest on one of the marsh islands. They decided to stay put, out of the way of DomDaniel, and soon there was a thriving chicken farm some miles away from Draggen Island.

THE MESSAGE RAT.

Stanley was eventually rescued from his prison under the floorboards of the Ladies' Washroom by one of the old Rat Office rats who had heard what had happened to him. He spent some time recovering at the rat's nest at the top of the East Gate gatehouse tower, where Lucy Gringe took to feeding him biscuits and confiding her troubles to him. In Stanley's opinion, Lucy Gringe had had a lucky escape. If anyone had ever asked Stanley, he would have told them that Wizards in general, and Wizards called Heap in particular, were nothing but trouble. But no one ever did ask.

EXCERPT FROM.

SEPTIMUS HEAP.

BOOK TWO.

Flyte

THE Y YEAR B BEFORE:.

ON THE N NIGHT OF THE A APPRENTICE S SUPPER.

It is night on the Marram Marshes; a full moon s.h.i.+nes down on the black waters and illuminates the nighttime Things who are going about their business. Silence hangs in the air, broken occasionally by the glugs and gurgles of the Quake Ooze as the creatures that live beneath it make their way to a feast. A huge s.h.i.+p with a full complement of sailors has sunk into the Ooze and the Things are hungry-but they will have to fight the Quake Ooze Brownies for the leftovers. Every now and then a bubble of gas throws something from the s.h.i.+p up to the surface, and great planks and spars covered in a thick black tar float across the top of the Ooze.

Nighttime on the Marram Marshes is no time for a human being to be abroad, but in the distance, paddling steadily toward the s.h.i.+p, is a figure in a small canoe. His fair curly hair hangs limp in the damp marsh air, and his piercing green eyes stare angrily into the night as he mutters furiously to himself, replaying over and over a fierce argument he has had that very evening. But what does he he care anymore? he asks himself. He is on his way to a new life, one where his talents will be recognized and not pa.s.sed over in favor of an upstart n.o.body. care anymore? he asks himself. He is on his way to a new life, one where his talents will be recognized and not pa.s.sed over in favor of an upstart n.o.body.

As he nears all that can be seen of the s.h.i.+p-a single mast sticking out of the Ooze topped with a limp and ragged red flag with a line of three black stars-he steers the canoe into a narrow channel that will take him to the very foot of the mast. He s.h.i.+vers, not with the cold, but from the feeling of fear that hangs in the air, and the thought that beneath him lies the s.h.i.+p's carca.s.s, picked clean by the Quake Ooze Brownies. Now the debris is slowing him down. He propels the canoe forward until he is suddenly forced to a halt-there is something under the water blocking his path. He peers into the brackish sludge and can see nothing at first, but then . . . then he sees something below him, ice-white in the moonlight. It is moving . . . moving up through the water, and suddenly a skeleton, picked clean and bright by the Brownies, breaks the surface, sending a plume of black slime over the occupant of the canoe.

Shaking with a mixture of fear and excitement, the canoe-ist allows the skeleton to climb aboard and settle itself behind him, sticking its sharp kneecaps into his back. For he knows by the rings still on the bony fingers, that this is what he has been hoping to find-the skeleton of DomDaniel him self, Necromancer, twice ExtraOrdinary Wizard and, in the canoeist's opinion, a far superior Wizard to any he has met so far. And particularly superior to the one he has just been forced to share an Apprentice Supper with.

The canoeist makes a deal with the skeleton. He will do all that he can to Restore him to life and to allow him to reclaim his rightful place in the Wizard Tower, if only the skeleton will accept him as his Apprentice.

With a nod of his bony skull, the skeleton agrees to the deal. The canoe resumes its journey, directed by the somewhat impatient bony forefinger of the skeleton jabbing the canoe-ist in the back. At last they reach the edge of the Marsh, whereupon the skeleton climbs out of the canoe and leads the tall, fair-haired young man into the bleakest place he has ever been. As the young man follows the shambling gait of the skeleton through a desolate landscape, the thought of what he has left behind briefly crosses his mind. But only briefly, for this is his new life now and he will show them all-and then then they'll be sorry. they'll be sorry.

Especially when he he becomes the ExtraOrdinary Wizard. becomes the ExtraOrdinary Wizard.

1.

SPIDERS.

Septimus Heap tipped six spiders into a jar, screwed the lid down tight and put them outside the door. Then he picked up his broom and continued sweeping out the Pyramid Library.

The Library was cramped and dark. It was lit by a few fat candles that spat and spluttered, and it smelled weird-a mixture of incense, musty paper and moldy leather. Septimus loved it. It was a Magykal place, perched right at the top of the Wizard Tower and hidden away deep inside the golden Pyramid, which crowned the Tower. Outside, the hammered gold of the Pyramid s.h.i.+mmered brightly in the early-morning sun.

After Septimus had finished sweeping, he made his way slowly along the shelves, humming happily to himself while he sorted out the Magykal books, parchments and spells that the ExtraOrdinary Wizard, Marcia Overstrand, had, as usual, left in a mess. Most eleven-and-a-half-year-old boys would rather have been out in the bright summer morning, but Septimus was where he wanted to be. He had spent quite enough summer mornings outside-and winter ones, come to that-in the first ten years of his life as Young Army soldier, Boy 412.

It was Septimus's job, as Apprentice to the ExtraOrdinary Wizard, to tidy the Library every morning. And every morning Septimus found something new and exciting. Often it was something that Marcia had left out especially for him: maybe a Conjuration that she had come across late at night and thought might interest him or a dog-eared old spell book that she had taken from one of the Hidden shelves. But today, Septimus reckoned he had found something for himself: it was stuck underneath a heavy bra.s.s candlestick and looked slightly disgusting-not the kind of thing that Marcia Overstrand would want to get her hands messy with. Very carefully he pried the sticky brown square off the bottom of the candlestick and put it in the palm of his hand. Septimus examined his find and felt excited-he was sure it was a Taste Charm. The thick, brown, square tablet looked looked like an old piece of chocolate; it smelled like an old piece of chocolate; and he was pretty sure it would taste like an old piece of chocolate too, although he wasn't going to risk it. There was a chance it might be a poison Charm that had dropped out of the large box labeled: like an old piece of chocolate; it smelled like an old piece of chocolate; and he was pretty sure it would taste like an old piece of chocolate too, although he wasn't going to risk it. There was a chance it might be a poison Charm that had dropped out of the large box labeled: TOXINS, VENOMS AND BASYK BANES TOXINS, VENOMS AND BASYK BANES, which teetered unsteadily on the shelf above.

Septimus pulled out a small Enhancing Gla.s.s from his Apprentice belt and held it so that he could read the thin white writing that looped across the square. The words said: Take me, shake me, and I will make thee: Quetzalcoatl's Tchocolatl.

Septimus grinned. He was right, but then he usually was when it came to Magyk. It was was a Taste Charm-even better, it was a a Taste Charm-even better, it was a chocolate chocolate Taste Charm. Septimus knew just the person he wanted to give it to. Smiling to himself, he slipped the Charm into his pocket. Taste Charm. Septimus knew just the person he wanted to give it to. Smiling to himself, he slipped the Charm into his pocket.

Septimus's work in the Library was nearly done. He climbed up the ladder to tidy the last shelf and suddenly found himself eye to eye with the biggest, hairiest spider he had ever seen. Septimus gulped; if it had not been for Marcia insisting on him removing every single spider that he found from the Library, he would happily have left this one alone. He was sure the spider's eight beady eyes were trying to stare him down, and he didn't like its long, hairy legs either. In fact all eight legs looked as though they were planning to run up his sleeve if he didn't grab the spider fast.

In a flash, Septimus had the spider in his hand. The creature scrabbled angrily against his dusty fingers, trying to pry them open with its surprisingly powerful legs, but Septimus held on tight. Quickly he made his way down the ladder, pa.s.sing the small hatch that led out onto the golden roof of the Pyramid. Just as he reached the bottom of the ladder, the spider bit the inside of his thumb.

"Ouch!" Septimus yelped.