A Knight Of Honour Part 13

'Oh, no-at least, he would not be interested in me. He came here but once with Stefan and has never returned.'

'But you will marry one day. I am sure of it.'

'Of course you will be invited when that happens,' Marguerite said and hugged her. 'I shall miss you, Elona. You have been the sister I have longed for and never had. But you must go to Stefan. I know that is where you want to be, and I am sure that he must be impatient for your coming.'

Elona smiled but made no reply. She was filled with trepidation as she took her farewell of Sir Ralph and Lady Alayne, thanking them for their kindness to her.

'It was a pleasure to have you here,' Alayne told her and kissed her warmly. 'We shall always be pleased to see you and Stefan at Banewulf, Elona. You will tell him that I said that, won't you? I have sometimes feared that he felt himself cast out when his father sent him from home at such a young age. It is the custom to send sons away for their training, but must often be hard for the child.'

'Yes, I shall tell him,' Elona said, but in truth she did not know when. Would Stefan even speak to her-would he admit her? What would she do if he turned her away?

'G.o.d speed, lady,' Sir Ralph said. 'I am sending ten of my best men with you and Alain. I do not believe you are in any danger, but I would not have harm come to you from my neglect.'

'I thank you for your care of me-and I ask you to forgive me, sir.'

'For what?' His brows rose and he was so like Stefan that her heart jerked. 'You are a lovely woman, Elona, and I believe no lasting harm has been done.'

Elona nodded, but could not meet his eyes. She had wanted to confess her sin to him, but Alain had advised against it.

'My father would not approve of what you did,' he told her. 'It is better that he does not know for the time being. When you have made your peace with Stefan will be time enough for the truth, I think.'

Elona could only take his advice, though she knew that Sir Ralph must suspect something, for it must be obvious to him that she was not carrying Stefan's child. Indeed, her grief had caused her to lose weight and she was more slender than she had been before she came to Banewulf.

'You are ready, lady?' Alain came to help her mount her palfrey.

She gave him her hand, her heart racing wildly. She was far from ready for Stefan's reaction when she arrived at his manor, hardly daring to think how he would look or what he might say to her. Indeed, she knew that she would never have dared to set out on this venture without Alain's help and rea.s.surance.

Their journey took them three days. They rode at a steady pace, finding time to talk and enjoy the pleasant countryside about them. He was, Elona thought, a wholly charming companion, but there was no danger that she would fall in love with him. Alain's smile brought her cheer, but it did not cause her knees to tremble or her body to ache with longing as the merest glance from Stefan always had.

When the large manor house came into view, Elona drew rein, her breath catching in her throat as they looked up to it, as it sat broodingly on a rise, its grey stone walls imposing and severe. The fortifications had been strengthened recently, as though Stefan felt that the peace England had enjoyed during much of King Henry's reign, despite the rebellions of his sons, might not always hold good. Yet the dwelling had also been improved, with new windows added to bring light and suns.h.i.+ne to what might otherwise have been a dark interior.

'Supposing he will not admit me?' she said to Alain as he brought his horse to a standstill beside hers. 'Where shall I go? I could not return to Banewulf.'

'Fear not, Elona. My brother will not send you away.' Alain smiled at her encouragingly. 'Do not forget that you are the Lady de Barre as well as Stefan's wife, and you have the right to be treated with respect if nothing more.'

Elona's head went up. She must have the courage to carry out this bold plan, though her knees felt suddenly turned to water and her mouth was dry.

As the column of men, women, and wagons wound slowly up towards the manor of Sans...o...b.., she could see activity about the gates and wondered if they would be closed against her. However, nothing happened and their entire party was allowed in unchallenged.

Alain helped her dismount as a man she had never seen before came to greet them. He was in his middle years, clearly a steward and just as clearly bewildered by seeing his lord's wife in their courtyard.

'Sir-my lady, I fear I was unprepared for your coming. My lord did not tell me he expected you.'

'My brother must have had other matters on his mind,' Alain said, covering Elona's confusion with his easy charm. 'Where is he? I would have words with him.'

'My lord and some of his men went hunting this morning,' the steward said. 'Forgive me, sir. My wits are scattered. I am Piers, Baron Sans...o...b..'s steward. I shall have rooms made ready for you at once.' He turned to Elona with a bow. 'Your apartments have been ready for some time, my lady, though a fire would have been lit had I known you were expected.'

'It may be done when your people have time, Piers,' she said and smiled at him. 'If you could have someone show me the direction, please? I would rest for a little-before my lord returns.'

Her heart had stopped racing. The meeting that she had dreaded had been postponed. Stefan had not been here to deny her entrance, as she'd feared-but what would he say when he returned?

'My wife is here?' Stefan managed to keep his tone level as he looked at the steward. Why had his heart leapt with joy? Was he fool enough to love her still, after her self-confessed wanton behaviour? 'And my brother? He escorted her here himself?'

'Yes, sir. I am sorry that I was not better prepared for their arrival. If you told me of it, I had forgotten.'

'No, no, it was not your fault,' Stefan said, his face expressionless as he fought against the warring emotions raging through him. The immediate joy had faded swiftly to be replaced by doubt and rage. Elona here? How dare she defy him? He would send her packing immediately!

And yet in truth he had been thinking of sending for her this past month or more. Stefan had begun to realise that it was foolish to keep her at arm's length. She was, after all, his wife and he could never take another without casting her off. How could he do that when it would shame her? Surely he was man enough to accept what was past and look to the future?

'I had not realised that she would be here so soon.' He nodded dismissal to Piers, pacing the room as he tried to calm himself for the inevitable interview with Elona. She was here now and he must learn to live with the knowledge of her sin, the fact that she was bearing another man's child. He must learn to control his feelings! To accept that what had been done could not be undone.

'Ah, brother. I am glad to see you returned safely from the hunt.'

Stefan swung round as his half-brother came into the room. 'Alain,' he said, some of his anger defusing as he saw the other's merry smile. He had never held a grudge against Alain, blaming his father alone for his banishment from Banewulf. 'So you have brought my wife to me. I must thank you, though I should have come to fetch her myself in time.'

'She was pining,' Alain replied with a careless shrug. 'She truly loves you, Stefan. You should have brought her with you instead of leaving her at Banewulf. She would not have minded a little discomfort to be with you.'

Stefan's eyes narrowed, his hackles rising like a dog defending its food. Elona was his, even if he had not claimed her. 'Did she tell you that?'

'Yes...' It was on the tip of Alain's tongue to reveal all, but something held him back. If Stefan loved his wife, he would discover the truth for himself, and if he did not-then Elona must bear the consequences. He did not have the right to interfere between husband and wife. 'I admire her a great deal, Stefan. She is as brave as she is lovely.'

Stefan's eyes narrowed. Had his brother come here to pick a quarrel with him? 'No doubt you think me a knave for stealing her from you?'

'Indeed not,' Alain cried and laughed. 'It was for this reason that I brought her to you myself, Stefan, so that we might clear any misunderstanding between us. I admire her and love her as a brother should, but I have no wish to marry-Elona or any other woman. I am not yet ready to marry. I have other plans.'

'You wish to prove yourself, I think?'

Alain nodded. 'I must gain my knighthood. I have stayed at home for my mother's sake, but I shall go very soon now.'

'Then perhaps you might care to hear news that reached me yesterday? Duke Richard has decided that Saladin must be stopped and he intends to march against him. He is even now rallying men to fight with him in the Holy Land.'

'Take up the Cross!' Alain's eyes lit with excitement. He was as devout as any young man of his era, but it was the thought of battle, of winning glory and earning his knighthood that appealed to him; to join a great crusade was exactly what he had yearned for. 'I vow 'tis a worthy cause. Even my mother will not deny that-nor that I must offer the Duke my sword. Think you he will accept it?'

'I am sure he will be pleased to accept your service, brother. I have had my share of fighting and shall not go, but you will stand in my stead and win honour for yourself and our family.'

'It is my heart's desire. I cannot bide at home forever, even to please my mother.'

'She will understand and give her blessing,' Stefan a.s.sured him. 'But you will stay with us for a few days?'

'For one night,' Alain told him. 'You have no need of me here, brother.'

'You are always welcome in my home,' Stefan said with a smile. 'I have never held a grudge against you, Alain.'

With the insight that was a part of his nature, Alain had known and understood that Stefan felt his father had rejected him as a child, hut between them there had never been anything less than friends.h.i.+p.

'I envied you, living and training with our kinsman's men, learning to be a knight. When you were winning your spurs in battles with Duke Richard and I, just a boy, I wished I could follow in your footsteps. The travelling minstrels sung stories of great heroes of the past, but you were my hero, brother. I wanted to be you.'

Stefan smiled, for he could not doubt the other's sincerity.

'I believe you will surpa.s.s me, Alain. You have it in you to be a great knight, a man of mercy and right.'

'If I can do as well as my brother, I shall be satisfied.'

'Then I shall wish you G.o.d speed. I can offer you no advice, for a man must find his own way in life and you have chosen yours.'

'Then we part as friends-no shadows between us?'

'We are friends. May G.o.d keep you safe until we meet again on English soil.'

'And may G.o.d give you peace and happiness,' Alain said. 'But I keep you talking and you will wish to greet your wife.'

'My wife...' Stefan's mouth hardened. 'I shall go to her shortly. But first I have a gift for you...' He crossed to one of the huge oak chests ranged against the walls at the end of the large chamber and lifted the heavy lid, taking from it a sword of s.h.i.+ning metal, the hilt chased with gold and silver, the sheath a work of great art. 'I won this in a great tourney in Aquitaine. Take it with my good wishes, Alain. It was too light for me, but I believe it is about your weight.'

Alain took the sword, marvelling at its balance and the way the handle seemed to fit his hand so perfectly. It was not only a thing of beauty, its blade sharper than any he had yet seen, it felt right, and he knew it to be valuable.

'This is a precious gift, Stefan.'

'Worthy of the knight you will become,' Stefan said and clasped his shoulder. 'The knight from whom I won the sword claimed that it had magical powers and that he had it from a magician in the east, but I do not believe in such nonsense. Yet in the hands of the right man I dare swear it could do marvellous things, and I believe you are that man.'

'I do not know how to thank you.' A slightly awkward expression came to his eyes. 'I have a confession that I must make to you, concerning...'

'The little accidents on our journey?' Stefan's brows rose, a hint of mockery in his eyes. 'Always they were the thorn that p.r.i.c.ked me, but nothing terrible happened because of them- no man was killed, no beast injured. At first I wondered if Danewold had a spy in the camp. I even suspected my own men, and then I began to wonder. Now that you have told me you had no wish to marry, I think I need look no further for the culprit.'

'It was a boy's prank,' Alain admitted. 'I worried lest Graylin should do something that resulted in injury and wished I had not sent him with you. 'Tis time I had more to occupy my time than foolishness.'

'I agree that you should leave your home and seek life,' Stefan said. 'Though you may not find it as sweet as you expect-but now, come and drink a cup of ale with me. I dare say Elona has plenty to do settling into her new apartments. And I shall see her at supper. Let us talk, Alain, for it may be many years before we meet again.'

Indeed, it might be that they would never meet in this life, for there were many perils on the way to the Holy Land and too many men died in battle or its aftermath.

Elona was aware that her husband had returned to the manor and steeled herself against his anger. She was sure that he would come to her in a rage, mayhap to send her away before her women had time to unpack her chests.

Yet her apartments were comfortable, furnished with all the basic necessities she needed. There was a bed of huge proportions, its ends carved and gilded in a manner she had never seen before, but thought must come from some exotic land to the east. One wall of the chamber had a window that looked down at the courtyard below, and beneath it was ranged a large oak chest banded with iron clasps and studs. Other chests stood about the room, giving her s.p.a.ce to store her gowns and possessions, and there were two stools and a chair with X-shaped supports, which was also carved and gilded on the back and arms. A frame for her needlework stood by the window, also a trestle and board. Here she would sit to write her accounts, Elona thought, and then flushed as she wondered if Stefan would trust her to keep his household accounts. Mayhap he would choose to leave that to his steward.

The walls were hung with tapestries of rich hues that gave the room warmth and light, and there was a separate room where her clothes could be laid on wooden shelves.

Her women had a room beyond that she would use as her privy and there was a further room at the opposite side of hers that she had been told led to her husband's bedchamber. She had not so far dared to look inside.

She had been busy directing her women to unpack her own goods, and now had all her things about her, small personal treasures that had belonged to her mother. With the sewing box her brother had given her as a gift one Christmastide, her Bible, and various combs, brushes, scent flasks and ornaments, the chamber had taken on a permanence that made her feel as if she truly belonged there.

But for how long? she wondered uneasily. Would her women be ordered to pack her things as soon as Stefan had had time to consider?

Now that all was in order, she had changed into a fresh tunic and kirtle with a surcote of blue wool, because the chill of autumn had settled with the evening. She waited nervously for Stefan's arrival, certain that he would burst into her chamber and demand an explanation for her unannounced arrival.

When the summons came it was from Piers, who told her that Baron Sans...o...b.. awaited her in the hail, where a meal was being served.

'Forgive the tardy invitation, my lady. It was expected that you would come down when you were ready.'

'I was not sure. . .at what hour you supped.'

She had not thought she would be expected to join her husband and his men at supper in the hail. Indeed, she had expected to be banished and her stomach was a spasm of nerves as she followed Piers from her chamber, along the gallery and down the wide, important staircase. How different this house was from those she had known before she left her home. Banewulf too was more of a home than a fortress, which she knew from Lady Alayne was because there had been peace in England since King Henry II came to the throne.

'Before that there was always unrest,' Alayne had told her.

'But whatever history may say of this king, he has done that much for his people. There have been rebellions by his sons, but thus far the n.o.bles have lived peaceably with one another-for most of the time.'

Elona knew that n.o.blemen grew greedy for wealth and lands, quarrelling with their neighbours over the merest trifle as an excuse to fight and steal their property. Her father had constantly been fighting petty battles with his close neighbours, and she marvelled that the English King had managed to keep stability in his kingdom for so long.

The hail was not as large as some she had seen, but it was large enough for the gathering of perhaps sixty men who sat at the boards that had been set on long trestles. They were drinking ale and wine from cups of pewter or horn, but as she entered they rose as one and saluted her.

'To the lady of Sans...o...b.., welcome.'

The cheering brought a lump to her throat. She had not expected this and the tears were close as she made her way to the high table where Stefan, Alain, a round-cheeked priest and the steward stood to greet her. Her heart was hammering as she made her curtsy to her husband. Now, now if he so chose, he could shame her so deeply that she would never dare to defy him again.

'My lord...'

'My lady,' Stefan said, his dark grey eyes dwelling on her face. He had noticed the slenderness of her figure as she walked so proudly down the full length of the hail, the heavy train of her gown trailing behind her. He noticed that it was the gown she had worn to the tourney, the one he had bought for her, and wondered if that was why she had chosen it. Oh, unworthy soul that he was to rejoice in the loss of a child! Yet the relief was so overwhelming that his throat ached from it.

'We had not thought to send for you sooner. Please take your seat by my side if you will.'

'Thank you, my lord,' Elona whispered, daring at last to meet his eyes. She could see that they held a serious, thoughtful expression, but no sign of the icy anger of their last meeting. Had he forgiven her? But no, he was merely showing mercy. She knew that he was renowned for the mercy he had shown his enemies, how could he be less forgiving to her?

She took her place at his left side, the right occupied by his brother, who was their guest and ent.i.tled to the place of honour. A servant came forward with a dish of fowl swimming in a rich sauce, another brought bread, another cold meat and cheese on a silver platter.

She accepted a little of the cold meats, refusing the richer dish and taking a chunk of the fresh bread, which crumbled in her fingers as she ate. She was conscious of Stefan sitting next to her, of the slight scent of leather and horses, of cedar wood and his own musk that she found so attractive. At court some of the men had used perfumes to mask the body odours beneath their rich robes, but she knew that Stefan bathed regularly, either in a handy stream when travelling or in the tub his men provided, and needed no such arts to cover the stench of stale sweat.

Wine had been poured for her into a silver cup. She sipped it and discovered that it tasted sweeter than she was used to and looked at Stefan in surprise and pleasure.

'Honey wine,' he told her. 'Have you not tasted it before, lady?'

'No, never,' she said and took another sip. 'My father's taste was for something much different. I found it sour and often drank only water at table. This is much more pleasant to the tongue.'

'I had it brought here... for those who prefer it,' Stefan said. 'But be careful, Elona, it is a potent brew. Too much and you will lose your senses and your dignity.'

'I have never drunk more than one cup of wine at table, my lord.' Her head went up, pride making her eyes glitter. Was he reminding her that he expected her to behave with a proper modesty?

Stefan was surprised at the way his heart gladdened to see such pride in her eyes. He had thought it crushed entirely and regretted the part he had played in her humiliation. She had lain with her squire and that could never be changed; it was a stain upon her honour, but not such a terrible sin. He could have understood and forgiven it in another, but in the woman he loved-the woman he had thought returned his love-the knowledge had sent him reeling to a pit of despair.

'I am merely warning you,' he said now, denying the urge to smile at her, to tell her that he was pleased to see her despite the jealousy that still lingered at the back of his mind. But it had abated now that his first shock had cooled, and he believed he could keep it at the back of his mind. He was after all a grown man, not a sullen child. 'I would not want you to be taken unawares by its potency.'

'I thank you for your concern, my lord,' Elona said and defiantly took another sip, but then, remembering that she relied on his tolerance, she put it down and summoned the servant carrying the water jug. 'Some water, if you please.'

'We are all pleased to see you here, lady,' the priest said to her, claiming her attention. 'I am Father Fernando and I serve Sir Stefan as his chaplain here. I am always at your service should you need me.'

'Thank you, sir,' Elona said and smiled at him. 'Do you read the Latin? I can read and write in my own language, and in English, for my stepmother taught me, and I know how to keep accounts, but I confess I cannot read the Latin.'

'Would you wish to do so, my lady?' The priest was a little surprised, for few ladies bothered to learn more than how to write their name, though some could keep accounts.

'Oh, yes,' Elona replied. 'For then I could read the Bible. I have a copy that belonged to my stepmother, but I can only look at the ill.u.s.trations, which are very fine and coloured in gold and crimson and blue-but I would like to be able to read from it sometimes.'