TEARS OF A WOMAN 9 Chapter Nine

When Susan held the letter she wasn't sure if the content was what she could handle; one thousand and one thoughts flashed through her mind. Could it be her uncle silence has something to do with the letter? Well no matter how long it takes, a stammer must surely spell his father's name: Susan was sure sooner or later she would find out the reason behind his uncle's silence. Hoping for the best but expecting the worst, she summoned the courage to open the neatly-sealed envelope and it read:

Dear daughter

You may find this letter too lengthy but it contains all the necessary truth you need to know about life and marriage. Whenever in doubt or confused about life, you always run to me for advice. I may not be there when you would be getting married. As the caring mother you have always known me to be I decided to write this lengthy letter of advice to you because I know you will need it one day. But the sad thing is by then I probably will have gone to be with the Lord. Time and health are no longer by my side. I am having some strange feelings that I will soon go home.

Should your friends read this letter with you don't be surprised that they may not like the content. It's not what their itching ears want to hear. But never mind I am your mother. I will not deceive you or lie to you. My hand is shaking as I'm writing this letter due to the situation of my health. But I must write it because of the need in the nearest future.

Should the good Lord give you the precious gift of a husband which I really pray he does, there are very important things I would want you to know about marriage. As important as it may be, don't be surprised that you may not hear it from any other person, even from the altar or your religious leaders due to high level of the sanctimonious att.i.tude in the church these days. But don't be blind to read them in this letter.

My lovely daughter, it's my heart's desire that you are happily married because it is the joy of every mother to see her children happily married. There is no way you can build a happy or G.o.dly home when you are not happily married. Make sure your children are not conformed to the pattern of this world; raise them in the ways of the Lord.

But first of all, I want you to understand that the purpose of marriage is for the advancement of Christ's kingdom. He also designed it as a means of filling the earth. He wants you to be fruitful. He wants you to enjoy marriage not to endure it. It's my prayer and earnest heart's desire that you are happy all the days of your marital lives.

Marry a man whose purpose in marriage is love and not s.e.xual pleasures. When he is tired of your body he will start cheating on you and looking for another fresh body to satisfy his s.e.xual desire. Don't marry him because you are seeing him as a Christian brother but marry him because he truly loves you. Some men go to church to look for a wife because they believe that Christian ladies will tolerate their bad habits. If you ever marry any of them you may regret that marriage all the days of your life.

Don't marry him because he is handsome. Money and appearance catch the attention of girls but character catches the heart of the real women. But at the end what you would live with is his character and not his looks. One day you will be tired of his looks but what keeps the marriage going are the love and his good character. What keeps him attractive to your friends is his appearance but what keeps him attractive to you is his character.

When you give birth in the future don't forget to keep this letter for your children. Make sure they read it. I reserve this part to my future grandchildren especially the boys.

To my boys in the house.

Marry a woman whose purpose in marriage is love not material things. When those things are no longer there she will either leave or start cheating on you. Don't marry her because you are seeing her as a Christian sister; most of the girls are in the church because they believe they will find a man that will marry them.

Their purpose of coming to church is to get a husband and nothing more. If you ever marry any of them you will regret that marriage for all the days of your life because she would make your life miserable. Don't marry to impress your colleagues or friends but marry to impress G.o.d who inst.i.tuted marriage. Don't be deceived by her looks or be carried away by her beauty.

Don't marry her because she is beautiful. Nice stature and a pretty face catch the attention of men but character catches the heart of the real men. At the end what you would live with is her character and not her pretty face. One day her pretty face will fade and you will be tired of her beauty, when those things fade her character will keep the marriage strong. What keeps her attractive to your friends is her beauty but what keeps her attractive to you is her character.

To you all.

No matter what happens in your relations.h.i.+p or marriage never discuss it with the outsiders. They may not tell you they are facing the same challenges but will try to poison your heart against your spouse. Share all your secrets and hurts with your spouse. Do not share them with the outsiders so that they will not ruin your home. Never allow friends to run your home for you.

Everybody is looking for love but the funny thing about it is that most often you see it in the least expected place. A place you never believed you could ever find it in life. But when you find it, no matter where you found it be ready to listen to your heart. Be sure not to listen with your brain so you do not miss this precious thing. Most times you may not have found it where you would want it to come from, but no matter where you found it, don't be careless to miss it or let go of it. Sometimes in life what you expect to get is not what you are seeing, don't reject the one G.o.d sent to you. You may not like it initially but trust him. You will like it at the end.

When whom you want, the very one your heart desired so much to be with, leaves you, be careful never to seal the door of your heart. Keep it open for the one who is meant to stay. Don't keep malice and never bring old bricks from your old house to build a new one. I mean never bring whatever ugliness happened in your past relations.h.i.+p into the new one.
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Leave the past behind. Never make him or her pay for the things that happened in your past relations.h.i.+p because he or she was not there when it happened. Be determined to work on your differences until you are perfect. Let forgiveness be the first thing on your marital list; after it, any other thing can follow.

Girls, always respect his authority as the man of the house. Love his heart and not his pocket. Men, always recognize her weakness as a weaker vessel. Love her heart and not her body. Never pa.s.s a night without praying together. I almost forgot to tell you that true love is not burying Juliet beside Romeo, but seeing grandma and grandpa growing old together under the same roof, still respecting, celebrating, and admiring each other.

May the good Lord give you people the perfect understanding of marriage, and unto his gracious hand, I commit your marriages.

Thanks.

Your Aging Mother

When Susan finished reading the letter she held her breath for a while and started thinking about the past, the present and the future. Could the letter be her uncle's silent noise? No, the echo of the silence was beyond word's interpretation. Her mind was not at rest and there was no way it would be until she found out the message in the silence. It would be better to allow the sleeping dog to lie than to touch the tail of a sleeping tigress. What if the message could ruin her forever if she insisted in digging it out? Because if a man goes to bed with an itchy a.n.u.s, he must surely wake up with a smelly finger.

But all the same, she was thankful for her mother's letter. It made her day. Susan read the letter when she needed it most. But she lamented that if her mother was alive, she might know some reasons behind certain things she couldn't explain. Like the silent noise of her uncle which she could not decode. Susan believed it was a silent noise because it was a silence that meant a lot; but she was glad her mother took time to write important things down for her. One may not know the importance of a mother until she loses her.

If Susan's mother was still alive when she read the letter, she would appreciate it more. Susan believed her mother was like the moon and not like the sun. She never stopped eulogizing her. She believed her mother was an angel in disguise. The true definition of mother; which at the sound of her voice the birds composed love song. The reason why the flowers wave to the pa.s.sing wind, her blue sky that smiled on the sunny day and the reason why the moon laughed at darkness.

Susan wanted to pen down more eulogy in the memory of her late mother but she didn't know where to start. A picture of a good companion flashed through her mind and she wrote. "Mama in the winter you kept my body warm, in the summer you kept it cool, in the cold you cover me with the blanket of your love. In tears you kept my eyes dry, in the dark you took my hand and led me on, in the rain you were my umbrella, in the storm you were my sunrise.

In the music you were my lyrics, in the sleep you were my dream, at frown you were my smile. You may have the bodily shape of a woman but you were an angel in disguise sent from above to make me strong and great. Though you were no more but you left an indelible mark.

Susan did not sleep again that night and before she knew it, it was 5:10 am and Joash had told the driver to come and pick them up by 6am. She woke him up to start preparing. They had not finished preparing when the taxi driver arrived and alerted them. He kept time; They hurried up to meet him outside, and when they met him they apologized for their inability to keep time and they set for Joash's village.