Destroy Your New Life, Repair It, Destroy It Again By Doing Crazy Things While Screaming YOLO! 2 Exit Of The Vagina Or Childhood Trauma

I mentally prepare myself, and use my spirit to carve on a stone I picked on the ground at random a good million of runes. The purpose of these runes is to replace the formula of the spell. I don't think I'm able to recite thousands of words without any error, while if I make a mistake while carving the runes, I can start it again.

Sweet is flowing on my forehead, even if I don't have any body. I have to carve the runes with the precision of a machine, after all I have to make fit a million of runes on a little stone… But it's worth it!

[…]

After this long and meticulous work, I finally finished!

I active the first row of runes! This part is allowing me to see the figures of living beings through the walls, in the form of a halo. I search quickly a little halo in a bigger one, and I active the second row!

It's allowing me to lock my target. I'll lock a target in particular: the one of the child of whom I'll take the place!

The third and last part will allow me to place my soul with the baby. It will be up to me to destroy his soul then.

Yes, you'll say to me that destroying a soul is worse than killing.

Yes, it's not really nice.

But on the other hand, we also need to be objective: the low of the Empire isn't forbidding to destroy a soul!

I'm Nygglotian, but as all respectable citizen, when I change of country, I respect (when it's convenient for me), the regulations in force!

So I can destroy souls absolutely legally and with a clear conscience!

Well, anyway, it's time to go!

I active the third part of the spell!

I feel my soul leaving and lodge itself in the body of a baby.

Even if he's young, he's still the original owner of the body. I thus pa.s.s an entire day to fight against his soul for the control of his body.

But my rightful and justified efforts bore fruits! I finish by corner his soul in the right arm of my body (yes it's mine now)!

I don't have a lot of time left, I know that the birth is coming…

Oh f.u.c.k, it's moving around…

G.o.dd.a.m.n IT!

The birth was closer than expected, which means that after the birth, I'll have to share forever this body with this arm that have its own will!

So that, no way!

I try to accelerate things, but I don't have the time.

Anyway, there is one thing I see: there is light ahead!

On top of that, it's been a long time that the body have sensations, and I'm feeling really sticky and dirty.

I feel that I'm going out, and…

Holy s.h.i.+t open your legs! Don't p.i.s.s me off! Stop! No! No! Don't tighten them! I need to go out s.h.i.+t! Two viscous walls are gripping me while I feel that I'll finish crushed to death (or claustrophobic) if things keep up like this.

I was still struggling to go out of my mother, when I see a healer who is at last helping me to go out!

I want to speak, but I can't even breath!

I'm all slimy, I stink and I can't breath!

Can things be worst for me?

The physician is patting on my back and I start breathing, while swallowing a part of the gross liquid in my throat incidentally! It's actually really worse than just a bit earlier!

But nothing worse will ever happen to me… Wait…

No, you!

My right hand is trying to strangle me! He wants to weaken me to take again the control of my body! Is that really a baby? He's clearly cunning, and not in a good way!

I get rid with difficulty of my right hand while someone is taking me to my mother, who grip me against her (I want to take a shower d.a.m.n it).

After a little moment, finally, someone is cutting my umbilical cord and is carrying me to wash me.

I sigh of relief and I fall asleep…

[…]

It's been 8 years I'm in this body, and as a son of the emperor, it is now the time for me to learn magic (even if I already know it).

I go out of the imperial palace, go through the garden, and arrive before the tower of the imperial mage.

I raise my eyes on the dazzling sun, place my left hand before my eyes, and say:

-Aaah, what a lovely day to do some magic!

After all these years, I'm really happy to do again magic.

With a joyful pace, I enter the tower…

Old thoughts:

I envisaged to do something even funnier, but I was stuck for the description of the birth! After all, I don't remember how was my birth, and I don't know if the v.a.g.i.n.al liquid is slimy, so I improvised (if I googled it up I would have found too much p.o.r.n it's not SFW)! And I couldn't add some jokes (like for example during the fight between souls, "oh, he is kicking inside") because it lacked coherence (I don't want to do a jojo's second, I lacked place too, I can't fill jokes every 3 words).