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At least until Nikolai came along.
She sighed at the thought; it was hard not to blame the man for being too talented and causing this mess.
"Milady you don't have to do this." Alexis urged her once more, seeing Elya's sadness. She served Elya well as a Vice-Captain in the Knight Order of Chernigov, but the situation brought out the worst in her, allegiance was one thing, but her dismissal of the engagement was troublesome. They couldn't afford to offend House Morales.
"It's a necessity Alexis. We've been over this many times. Nikolai is doted on by the Emperor and with our recent… troubles with the Princes, this may be our best option to regain His Majesty's favour." Elya, s.h.i.+fted in her saddle, it had been several weeks since she'd ridden and Stormchaser was still recovering, trailing behind their caravan and the stallion's replacement just didn't suit her.
"As the second daughter of the Duke, you deserve better than to be married into another House."
"It's just a name." Even though she said that, being a Suzdal was all that she knew. She'd served the House since her birth, following their precepts of military service and honour. If the House demanded her sacrifice, then she wouldn't s.h.i.+rk her responsibilities.
"An ancient and honourable name Milady." Alexis mumbled, casting sideways glances at her Captain to gauge her mood. "There are uncountable cousins from the branch families. If the Morales' want a Suzdal, then they would be adequate."
Elya frowned at the grumbling, tapping her armour in thought. That was a possibility that had been considered but things had escalated drastically.
"The Romanov's offered the hand of Katerina in marriage."
"The Lotus Princess?" The Vice-Captain gasped. There were few in the Empire who had not heard tales of the beauty and grace of Katerina Romanov and it was said that if her suitors were gathered, they would be able to fill the entire central plaza of the Capital.
"Yes. There are… rumours that the Emperors favour has a deeper meaning when it comes to Nikolai." Elya twitched her reins to avoid damage in the road. "Some of it has been confirmed by our informants in the Palace so we had to move quickly."
"He has a Hand?" Alexis breathed out, her voice barely audible. No one would want to attract the attention of the Hand, the rumours surrounding them were terrifying.
"Among other things." There were certain things more dangerous to talk about than the Hands of the Emperor.
"But why you Milady?" Alexis whined, petulant and falling back on childish behaviour. Elya fixed her with a glare, reprimanding her wordlessly. They were still Knights and had to act with honour at all times.
"Elder Sister will inherit the Princ.i.p.ality and Sofiya is too young for this responsibility." She hesitated, not sure whether to explain everything. "Misha was considered but Father decided to let her serve the Court."
"I didn't know she pa.s.sed the exam." Alexis nodded, understanding the situation. "Still Milady, you deserve better. If it wasn't for your injury…" She trailed off, hanging her head in shame and refusing to meet Elya's gaze.
Elya winced, unconsciously rubbing the scar that marred her fair features. Inspecting her face in her bracers was uncomfortable. Not just because of the lack of clarity, but since the blade cut through her face, she wore a perpetual smirk, lips turned up on one side by scarred tissue. She knew what Alexis had been about to say, the topic none of her Knights even whispered in the dark recesses of the night.
Having a Prince cancel your engagement because you lacked beauty was a shameful tale at best. At worst it stopped a woman from meeting anyone ever again. Her Father had scrambled to search for a suitable alliance but was met with failure at every turn, the Morales overtures had been a blessing in disguise to the Grand Duke and he'd scrambled to finalise the details.
"Why should marriage have to be everything in our lives?" Elya whispered, eyes surveying the road for threats. Even though it shouldn't matter, Elya had felt shattered at the annulment. Not because she liked the Prince, but by the rejection. All the work she did, her efforts in the Order, leaders.h.i.+p in the war, felt pointless. Removed by her loss of value as a bride.
"Nikolai was there." She added, louder so Alexis would hear.
"At Galicia?" the Vice-Captain looked up in shock. "He was responsible for that spell formation?" That was almost a statement of fact, the survivors rarely spoke about the nightmare at Galicia, but putting the pieces together wasn't difficult.
"Yes, he was."
"He saved our lives." There was newfound respect in Alexis' eyes. Living through that battle had changed all of them, soldiers that were haunted by dreams of charging barbarians and ancient horrors, overwhelming armies and the screams of their comrades.
"That's not a reason to marry him though." Elya pointed out drawing a shaky breath, trying to get rid of the memories. She glimpsed a flash in the distance and raised her fist to signal orders.
They'd reached the outskirts of Konstanz, seat of Count Nikolai Morales of Volhiniya, her future husband. Probably.
It was time to look good.
"Raise the banners!" Alexis roared, moving through the column to arrange the formation. It was necessary for Suzdal's to shock and awe.
The first impression would be important.
Tapping her bracers, Elya waited for the banner women bearing the crests of Suzdal and the Order formed up behind her.
Her heart thumped in fear.
Fear of losing her worth by becoming a bride.
Fear of rejection.
Fear of the man who had turned an army into dust using his abilities.