Potatoes Are the Only Thing That’s Needed in This World! - BestLightNovel.com
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Once I was finally released by the devil, Di Yana, I pushed open the front door of the village chief's house. Exposed to the intense sunlight, I stylishly ran my fingers through my white hair and walked out with firm steps like a fierce tiger.
Within the span of time that was wasted just now, there's no saying how many of my pitiful and innocent potatoes were put under the tortures of the bugs and weeds.
I'll be sure to rescue you all, so please wait for me!
Your hero has returned!
Sa! (Sound of fluttering of cape)
Let's go!
Execute...Justice!!!
"Puah...Ahahahaha~~~" However, before the hero of justice could take a step, he was mocked by the young lady behind him. "You... Hahaha... You were clearly crying so tragically a while ago, and now you are trying to act cool. You are really interesting, xiao ge~"
Forget it... Justice is dead.
The fall of a proud son of heaven, just like this.
Goodbye! Our eternal hero!
"Don't...... Don't mention that incident anymore, okay?! Let me forget what just happened!" Due to the feeling of shame, tears gushed out from the corner of my eyes once more as I fled forwards with all my strength.
"Hey~ I vividly remember it though." With no intention of letting me off, Lei Yi leisurely circled around, running ahead of me, with her hands behind her head and facing me, she hops backward with dexterous steps similar like a bunny
Accentuated by the suns.h.i.+ne, her hearty smile appeared even lovelier, with short shoulder-length hair that flows along with the wind emanating a sweet fragrance and her exposed tanned skin looking more tempting than ever before.
But...
But why!
Why do all of you like to follow me around? What's wrong with leaving me alone? I was planning to return and do some shameful things with my beloved potatoes! If you are going to obstruct me here, won't my plan fail completely?
s.h.i.+t... This girl's speed is too fast! What can I say, as expected from a [S Rank]?
This girl has some skills.
Hmph... Fine, I'll let you off today. Since you can match my speed, as one can imagine, you are not one to be trifled with. I shall also stop damaging your pride, now. After all, once I get serious, destroying heaven and wiping out the earth is but a simple gesture for mine.
Heheheh... Cherish the life you have now, since Heroes and Justice are dead, in that case, I will become the Demon King!
And when the moment comes, other than potatoes, all lives in this world will be conquered with the endless fear and terror that I brought forth, falling at the feet of me and potatoes!
However, the Demon King needs a rest for now.
I stopped running, deeply exhaled towards the sky, slowed to a stop and put my hands on my knees while wheezing.
"Xiao ge... You only took a few steps... and you're already out of breath?" Lei Yi's snow white eyes slowly started to show her contempt towards me. With a smile which showed her canine tooth and seemed to be saying: "You are a weakling."
The Demon King has been defeated...
The Demon King was defeated by a sentence from this girl.
The world has regained its peace.
"Hu...Hu... I said... Don't...Hu... Don't follow me..."
"Huh? What did you say? I didn't catch that." Lei Yi asked with a puzzled face while scratching the back of her head. It truly appears that she didn't understand what I had said while I was panting my lungs out.
Hence, I finished catching my breath, changed my tone, restrained my facial expression, and acted like a dignified ancient emperor and repeated my words again. "What's your intention for following me?" (TN: MC spoke the sentence in ancient Chinese.)
"Puah hahaha, it's really interesting to follow you around, xiao ge." Lei Yi held her belly and burst out laughing, even falling down on the ground like having a spasm, her slim body trembling.
Ah... the ancient emperor has died too.
Finally seeing my serious face due to resentment and heartbreak, Lei Yi finally restrained her laughter and said with bright red, puffed up cheeks. "Both the leader and my squad still need some time to reach here, and miss gigantic b.r.e.a.s.t.s has also said that I could stay in this village as I please. That being the case, I will walk around with xiao gem you."
Miss Gigantic b.r.e.a.s.t.s?
You are referring to the Iron Fist, Demon Claws - [Harbinger of Death. The Iron Fist of The World Destroyer Dragon. The Amba.s.sador of h.e.l.l] right?
"Eheheheheh... Thinking about that oppai, makes me unbearably thirsty... Gulp, gulp..." Lei Yi has completely changed into an appearance of a chikan, as she laid on the floor with large amounts of drool dripping from her mouth. (TN: Oppai means b.r.e.a.s.t.s in j.a.panese, chikan means pervert in j.a.panese. The author uses a few words from other countries)
Seriously... Are the people around me all perverts?
Wu De, a brat that threw stones at me every day while Di Yana is a hopeless brocon and now Lei Yi has also exposed her uncle's mentality completely. (TN: Uncle's mentality means acting like a old man and old man loves oppai.)
The snotty brat Wu De harbors a forbidden love towards me, Di Yana loves both me and her own brother and Lei Yi is deeply in love with Di Yana's oppai.
What is with these messy relations.h.i.+ps?
Anyhow, don't put me at the bottom of the food chain, okay? Have you guys already disregarded me as nothing more than a weed at the roadside?
s.h.i.+t, I want to distance myself from these guys! What to do? Is death the only choice?
And also, one more thing...
"What are you doing now?" While my brain was in the middle of collectively complaining about them, I felt a hand messaging my chest all over. Tracing the arm that is covered by the black leather sleeves upwards, the initially cute face is seemingly telling me: "Yaranaika?" (TN: Yaranaika? means why don't we do it? It's a reference to Kuso Miso technique , google it if you want to see the face.)
"Well... I was right, you lack training, I can't feel any muscle." Using her other hand to prop her chin, Lei Yi closed her eyes and went into deep thought, finally with a beam of light flas.h.i.+ng across from the corner of her eyes, she said with a low voice: "As expected, Di Yana's oppai is still the best."
What is this... Expert of Oppai Research?
"Stop it now!" I pushed away that perverted hand, covered my chest with both hands, and squatted down on the floor with tears.
I'm tarnished... I have been tarnished twice today! I can't marry now... There won't be anymore potatoes that will want me in this world!
"Hey~ Don't be so petty~ I'm a philanthropic person, even if there's a better one, I won't be choosy~ Heh Heh Heh..." Approaching me one step at a time like she's baring her fangs, Lei Yi has already lost her rationality, in her eyes now, she can only see my oppai.
"Don't come near me! No!" I howled as I retreated in terror.
"Go touch your own, if you want to touch some so much!"
This sentence reverberated in the empty pathway near a field and also stopped Lei Yi in her tracks.
Above the solidified smile, is a pair of empty eyes, the pair of eyes slowly s.h.i.+fted their line of sight downwards while both hands simultaneously moved slowly to the chest.
Rubbing up and down once, there's only the discovery of the lack of resistance and the feeling of rib bones which are seemingly declaring their existence at her touch.
"...!!!"
I'm not a slow-witted person, even if I only love potatoes and have no interest in females, I am fully aware of the tragic situation at hand.
G.o.d of potatoes! Why are you so cruel to Lei Yi? Why is there no equality among humans? Isn't this blatant favoritism a bit too cruel?
Even the canine tooth has lost its vitality, Lei Yi smiled bitterly, the corner of her eyes seemingly showing faint traces of tears. She spoke a word at a time with a trembling voice: "I......Nothing......That kind of thing......From the moment I was born until now......I don't have it all along, ya......"
"It's my fault... I'm really sorry!" Lei Yi and my standpoint was reversed instantaneously and we started to play each other's role from just 10 minutes before.
Although, there's not much change in her expression, her body was still trembling. Although she bit her lips to stop herself from crying, that failed in the end as her beady tears fell down.
"I...I'll let you touch! Come! Touch it!" I took the initiative and walked to her side and took off my s.h.i.+rt in one fell swoop and dangle her favorite thing in front of her.
"Hic...Hic..." She covered her eyes with both hands, wiping away the tears, trying to hide her injured heart.
What to do...What should I do now? Why did this woman suddenly cry...
Without any idea, I circled around her side with words stuck in my throat.
"Hey... Fo Mu..."
"...!!!"
An icy hand pressed on my naked shoulder, without looking, I can tell who the person is....
In short, in the eyes of an outsider, the situation is like this:
A vulgar faced, sweaty, naked man is requesting a slim and cute girl to touch his oppai, even if the girl had cried for help in agony, this man had absolutely no intention to stop his vulgar actions.
There's absolutely no way I can refute this...
But... My name is Fa Mu!!! (TN: In case no one knows, his name sounds like Farm, which makes his name Potato Farm)
"Nonono... Please listen to my explanation...Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!" My shoulder blade is suffering from a monstrous and ever tightening grip, failing to escape her hold, I knelt down on the ground powerlessly.
Di Yana, when did you become an a.s.sa.s.sin? How did you appear behind me without any sound or warning?
"Ouch! Ouch! Ouch! Ouch! Ouch! Ouch! My shoulder is breaking! It's breaking! Even if it broke, I don't have a straw hat to give you, so please stop!!" (Reference to one piece)
"Shut up and die... Disgusting pervert."
What is this... This Cliché accusation method, isn't this too much?
As I slowly lose the feeling of my shoulder, I gave up on the hope of living.
If there's reincarnation... I want to reincarnate to a potato...
"Di Yana-chan~~" Lei Yi threw herself into the b.r.e.a.s.t.s of Di Yana while crying and hugged her tightly, furthermore, she rubbed her tearful face on Di Yana's b.r.e.a.s.t.s.
Thanks to this, Di Yana's evil clutches loosened and started to gently caress and stroke on Lei Yi's smooth white hair.
Ah... I'm alive... But my left shoulder appears to have disappeared.
With my blurry eyes, I saw Lei Yi drooling on the 2 round-shaped objects, carrying a evil grin that seem to say [Plan Succeeded] to me.
s.h.i.+t... She definitely acted that way after she saw that Di Yana had appeared behind me!
Realizing that her plan has been exposed, Lei Yi stick out her tongue and used the movement of her lips and say to me, "Sorry~ Fo La~"
Who the h.e.l.l is Fo La...
How did I become Fo La from Fo Mu? Not even a single word is correct this time... This is a complete new name ah...
Forget it...
In any case, I don't have much time left even if I change into a puddle of liquid.
Hence...I closed my eyes and accepted reality.
[Villager (Level 1) has died...]
[Why are you dead again trash? Restart from the beginning (Pah)]
[Du Du Du Du Du Du...]