Tales and Novels Volume IX Part 43

"He is always expecting compliments from government," said Corny, "and always getting disappointments. Such throws as you have, Harry--Sixes!

again--Well, what luck!--all over with me--It is only a hit at any rate!

But what kind of man," continued he, "is this new clergyman?"

"Oh! them parsons is all one kind," said Father Jos.

"All one kind! No, no more than our own priests," said Corny. "There's good and bad, and all the difference in life."

"I don't know any thing at all about it," said Father Jos, sullenly; "but this I know, that no doubt he'll soon be over here, or his proctor, looking for the t.i.thes."

"I hope we will have no quarrels," said Corny.

"They ought to be abolished," said Father Jos, "the t.i.thes, that is, I mean."

"And the quarrels, too, I hope," said Ormond.

"Oh! It's not our fault if there's quarrels," said Father Jos.

"Faults on both sides generally in all quarrels," said Corny.

"In lay quarrels, like enough," said Father Jos. "In church quarrels, it don't become a good Catholic to say that."

"What?" said Corny.

"_That_," said the priest.

"Which?" said Corny.

"That which you said, that there's faults on both sides; sure there's but one side, and that's our own side, can be in the right there can't be two _right sides_, can there? and consequently I there won't be two wrong sides, will there?--Ergo, there cannot, by a parity of rasoning, be two sides in the wrong."

"Well, Harry, I'll take the black men now, and gammon you," said Corny.

"Play away, man--what are you thinking of? is it of what Father Jos said? 'tis beyond the limits of the human understanding."

Father Jos puffed away at his pipe for some time.

"I was tired and ashamed of all the wrangling for two-pence with the last man," said King Corny, "and I believe I was sometimes too hard and too hot myself; but if this man's a gentleman, I think we shall agree.

Did you hear his name, or any thing at all about him, Father?"

"He is one of them refugee families, the Huguenots, banished France by the adict of Nantz, they say, and his name's Cambray."

"Cambray!" exclaimed Ormond.

"A very good name," said O'Shane; "but what do you know of it, Harry?"

"Only, sir, I happened to meet with a Dr. Cambray the winter I was in Dublin, whom I thought a very agreeable, respectable, amiable man--and I wonder whether this is the same person."

"There is something more now, Harry Ormond, I know by your face," said Corny: "there's some story of or belonging to Dr. Cambray--what is it?"

"No story, only a slight circ.u.mstance--which, if you please, I'd rather not tell you, sir," said Ormond.

"That is something very extraordinary, and looks mysterious," said Father Jos.

"Nothing mysterious, I a.s.sure you," said Ormond,--"a mere trifle, which, if it concerned only myself, I would tell directly."

"Let him alone, father," said King Corny; "I am sure he has a good reason--and I'm not curious: only let me whisper this in your ear to show you my own penetration, Harry--I'd lay my life" (said he, stretching over and whispering), "I'd lay my life Miss Annaly has something to do with it."

"Miss Annaly!--nothing in the world--only--yes, I recollect she was present."

"There now--would not any body think I'm a conjuror? a physiognomist is cousin to (and not twice removed from) a conjuror."

"But I a.s.sure you, though you happened to guess right partly as to her being present, you are totally mistaken, sir, as to the rest."

"My dear Harry, _totally_ means _wholly_: if I'm right in a part, I can't be mistaken in the whole. I am glad to make you smile, any way--and I wish I was right altogether, and that you was as rich as Croesus into the bargain; but stay a bit, if you come home a hero from the wars--that may do--ladies are mighty fond of heroes."

It was in vain that Ormond a.s.sured his good old imaginative friend that he was upon a wrong scent. Cornelius stopped to humour him; but was convinced that he was right: then turned to the still smoking Father Jos, and went on asking questions about Dr. Cambray.

"I know nothing at all about him," said Father Jos, "but this, that Father M'Cormuck has dined with him, if I'm not misinformed, oftener than I think becoming in these times--making too free! And in the chapel last Sunday, I hear he made a very extraordinary address to his flock--there was one took down the words, and handed them to me: after remarking on the great distress of the season--first and foremost about the keeping of fast days the year--he allowed the poor of his flock, which is almost all, to eat meat whenever offered to them, because, said he, many would starve--now mark the obnoxious word--'if it was not for their benevolent Protestant neighbours, who make soup and broth for them.'"

"What is there obnoxious in that?" said Cornelius.

"Wait till you hear the end--'and feed and clothe the distressed.'"

"That is not obnoxious either, I hope," said Ormond, laughing.

"Young gentleman, you belong to the establishment, and are no judge in this case, permit me to remark," said Father Jos; "and I could wish Mr.

O'Shane would hear to the end, before he joins in a Protestant laugh."

"I've heard of a 'Protestant wind' before," said Harry, "but not of a Protestant laugh."

"Well, I'm serious, Father Jos," said Corny; "let me hear to the end what makes your face so long."

"'And, I am sorry to say, show more charity to them than their own people, the rich Catholics, sometimes do.' If that is not downright slander, I don't know what is," said Father Jos.

"Are you sure it is not truth, Father?" said Corny.

"And if it was, even, so much the worse, to be telling it in the chapel, and to his flock--very improper in a priest, very extraordinary conduct!"

Father Jos worked himself up to a high pitch of indignation, and railed and smoked for some time, while O'Shane and Ormond joined in defending M'Cormuck, and his address to his flock--and even his dining with the new clergyman of the parish. Father Jos gave up and had his punch. The result of the--whole was, that Ormond proposed to pay his respects the next morning to Dr. Cambray.

"Very proper," said O'Shane: "do so--fit you should--you are of his people, and you are acquainted with the gentleman--and I'd have you go and show yourself safe to him, that we've made no tampering with you."

Father Jos could not say so much, therefore he said nothing.

O'Shane continued, "A very exact church-goer at the little church there you've always been, at the other side of the lake--never hindered--make what compliment you will proper for me--say I'm too old and clumsy for morning visitings, and never go out of my islands. But still I can love my neighbour in or out of them, and hope, in the name of peace, to be on good terms. Sha'n't be my fault if them t.i.thes come across. Then I wish that bone of contention was from between the two churches. Meantime, I'm not snarling, if others is not craving: and I'd wish for the look of it, for your sake, Harry, that it should be all smooth; so say any thing you will for me to this Dr. Cambray,--though we are of a different faith, I should do any thing in rason."

"Rason! what's that about rason?" said Father Jos: "I hope faith comes before rason."

"And after it, too, I hope, Father," said Corny.