The Cruise of the "Esmeralda" Part 10

ON A LEE-Sh.o.r.e.

It was useless to think of heaving the s.h.i.+p to, or otherwise attempting to save the lives of the unfortunate Malays whose craft we had just destroyed; the thing was an absolute impossibility, and any such attempt would only have resulted in our own destruction; we had no option but to continue our headlong flight to leeward, leaving our enemies to save themselves, if they could, by clinging to the wreckage.

Immediately after the collision the carpenter came aft, and, without waiting for orders, carefully sounded the pumps. The result was a report that the hold was dry; we had therefore apparently sustained no serious damage to our hull; while, so far as spars and rigging were concerned, we did not appear to have parted a rope-yarn.

For fully half an hour the squall raged as madly as at the moment when it first burst upon us; all this while the s.h.i.+p was scudding helplessly before it, drawing nearer every moment to that deadly lee-sh.o.r.e that I knew must be close at hand, and which I every instant expected would bring us up all standing. At length, however, to my intense relief, the gale slightly but perceptibly moderated its headlong fury; and determining to at once avail myself of this opportunity, I called the hands to the braces, and prepared to bring the s.h.i.+p to the wind on the starboard tack. The moment that everything was ready I signed to the man at the wheel to put the helm gently over; when, as I was turning away again to give my orders to the men at the braces, one of them startled me with the cry of--

"Land ho! ahead and on the port bow!" I caught sight of it at the same instant, the air having momentarily cleared somewhat of the spindrift and scud-water that had hitherto circ.u.mscribed our horizon and obscured our view. Yes, there it was, a low, dark shadow against the now clear, starlit sky right ahead and stretching away to port and starboard on either bow. It could not be more than three miles distant from us--if so much--for the air, though somewhat clearer than it had been, was still thick, yet the loom of the land through it was clear enough; altogether too much so, indeed, for my liking. What it was like to the eastward I could not distinguish, for in that direction it faded quickly into the thick atmosphere that lay that way; but westward it terminated in a low point that already bore well out upon our larboard beam--a sight that caused me to most heartily congratulate myself that I had determined upon rounding-to on the starboard tack; for had I done so with the s.h.i.+p's head to the westward, without seeing this point, we could not possibly have weathered it, and must have taken our choice-- when we _did_ discover it--of going ash.o.r.e upon it, or upon the land to leeward, should we attempt to wear the s.h.i.+p; for she would never have tacked in such a sea as was now running, with such a small amount of canvas as we were showing.

As the s.h.i.+p came to the wind we, for the first time since the outburst of the gale, gained something like a just idea of its tremendous strength and violence. With nothing on her but the two close-reefed topsails and the fore-topmast staysail, the poor little _Esmeralda_ bowed beneath the fury of the blast until her lee rail was awash and her lee scuppers more than waist-deep in water. The howling and hooting of the gale aloft, as it tore furiously through the maze of spars and rigging opposed to it, produced a wild medley of sound that utterly baffles all attempt at description; while the savage plunges of the s.h.i.+p into the short, steep sea and the horrible way in which she careened during her lee rolls almost sickened me with anxiety lest the masts should go over the side and leave us to drive ash.o.r.e, a helpless hulk.

True, in such a case we might have attempted to anchor, but I had very grave doubts whether our ground-tackle, good though it was, would have brought us up in such weather. The masts stood well, however--they were magnificent sticks, both of them, while our standing rigging was of wire throughout--and, as to our canvas, had I not seen it, I could not have believed that any fabric woven by mortal hands would have withstood such a terrific strain. It did, however, and moreover dragged the s.h.i.+p along at a speed of which I should never have believed the little craft capable, under such very short canvas, and close-hauled, had I not been present to witness her performance. With her steeply heeling decks, her taunt masts and their intricacy of standing and running rigging taut and rigid as iron bars to windward, while to leeward they streamed away in deep, symmetrical curving bights, her braced-up yards, and the straining canvas of the close-reefed topsails and fore-topmast staysail all swaying wildly aslant athwart the blue-black expanse of star-spangled sky; with her lee rail awash; her decks a tumultuous sea in miniature with the water that came pouring in whole cataracts over her upturned weather-bow as her keen stem plunged headlong into and clove irresistibly through the heart of wave after wave, flinging a blinding deluge of spray right aft as far as the p.o.o.p, and ploughing up a whole acre of boiling, luminous foam, to pour, hissing and roaring, far out from under her lee bow and flash glancing past in a bewildering swirl of buzzing, gleaming froth, while the din of the wild gale raved aloft, and its furious buffeting almost distracted one's senses, the gallant little barque thus fighting for her life would have presented an exhilarating spectacle to any one; while a seaman's appreciative heart would have thrilled with exultation at her bearing in the strife. But though travelling fast through the water, the poor little s.h.i.+p was at the same time sagging most frightfully to leeward, the staysail seeming to drag her head two or three points off the wind at every send, and bringing her almost broadside-on to the sea. And although we were heading fairly well out toward the open water, I could not conceal from myself the awkward truth that our excessive leeway was reducing our course to one practically parallel with the trend of the coast; and sometimes I even thought that we were slowly but surely setting in toward the land. The fact was that the s.h.i.+p needed more after-sail to enable her to hold a good luff; yet it seemed to me that it would be impossible for her to bear any more. She was indeed rather over-pressed than otherwise, as it was, and had I had plenty of sea-room I would have endeavoured to relieve her of the fore-topsail at once, even at the risk of losing the sail in the attempt to hand it. But with that relentless lee-sh.o.r.e in plain view I dared not do it; it was imperative that she should carry every thread we were then showing, and more if possible. While I was still inwardly debating the question it was settled by the lookout reporting land ahead! I staggered over to windward at the cry, and at the expense of a thorough drenching, despite the oilskins I had donned some time before, made it out, a bold lofty headland, jutting far out to seaward, and lying dead ahead of us. The s.h.i.+p was embayed! The land ahead was certainly not more than three miles distant, and the s.h.i.+p was setting bodily down toward it at every plunge. The time for hesitation was past; something had to be done, and done promptly, too, or another half-hour would see the last of the poor little _Esmeralda_. Our main trysail happened to be a nearly new sail, bent for the first time when starting on this voyage; it was made of good stout canvas, and was beautifully cut. I therefore determined to attempt the experiment of setting it, though I scarcely hoped it would endure the tremendous strain to which it would be exposed long enough to drag us clear of that terrible point. Mustering the hands, therefore, we got the sheet aft and the block hooked on to the eye-bolt; then, all hands tailing on to the fall, the lower brails were eased gently away, the sheet being dragged upon at the same time; and in this way we managed to get the foot of the sail extended without splitting it. The hauling out of the head was a much simpler matter; and in less than five minutes I had the satisfaction of seeing the entire sail extended without having parted a thread. The effect of this added canvas was tremendous; the lee rail was completely buried, and the deck was now so steeply inclined that during the lee rolls it was impossible to maintain one's footing without holding on to something. But we no longer sagged to leeward as before; the s.h.i.+p now held her luff, and the threatening headland was brought to bear nearly three points on our lee bow; if the trysail would only hold out long enough we might yet hope to sc.r.a.pe clear. But would it?

Involuntarily I held my breath every time that the s.h.i.+p rolled to windward; for then the strain on canvas and spar and rigging was at its heaviest, and it really seemed to me as though nothing made by mortal hands could withstand it. Minute after minute pa.s.sed, however, and still the good sail stood, while hope every moment grew stronger within my breast.

We had reached to within half a mile of the point, and I was already congratulating myself upon the certainty that we should clear it, when I happened to catch a momentary glimpse, through the driving spray, of something peculiar in the appearance of the water just off the point.

Surely it could not be--fate would not be so cruel--and yet--

"Breakers on the lee bow!" simultaneously reported the two men on the lookout.

Then I was _not_ mistaken; it _was_ broken water I had seen. Yes; there could not be a doubt about it, for while I strained my gaze in an effort to pierce the darkness a ghostly white gleam shot into the air, such as is caused by the water breaking heavily upon rocks.

"Ay, ay; I see them," I answered; then, to the man at the wheel--"Watch your helm carefully, now, my man. Keep her clean full, and let her go through the water; but do not let her go off a hair's breadth more than is necessary. You must weather that reef if you have any wish to see to-morrow's sun rise."

"I'll do my best, sir," answered the fellow, earnestly; and I saw him brace himself afresh as he fixed his eye more intently upon the weather leach of the main-topsail.

We were _flying_ through the water--it could scarcely be called sailing--for the poor little s.h.i.+p was being so bitterly pressed that she scarcely rose at all to the seas now; she simply drove her sharp bows straight into the body of every sea as it came at her and ploughed her way through it, s.h.i.+pping at every plunge tons of water that poured in a continuous cataract over her forecastle and down into the seething swirl to leeward under which her lee rail was buried. She must have been travelling very fast, or she would not have behaved in this fas.h.i.+on; yet in the agony of my suspense she scarcely seemed to move at all. Despite this feeling it was sufficiently apparent that we were nearing that awful reef at headlong speed; and with every desperate forward plunge of the s.h.i.+p the frightful amount of lee drift we were making became also more unmistakable, momentarily increasing the doubt as to the possibility of our escape. We were now, and had been for some time, so close to the land that any attempt to wear the s.h.i.+p round must have inevitably resulted in her destruction; and, as to staying, that was equally out of the question under such short canvas in such a heavy sea--for the outer line of breakers was now close aboard of us; we dared not attempt to anchor in the face of that wild fury of wind and wave; and we had therefore absolutely no alternative but to keep on as we were going.

Our situation, in short, had become so critical that I felt it my duty to acquaint Sir Edgar with it forthwith; and I was on my way toward the companion in search of him when he emerged from it and joined me, the two seamen who had conveyed the inanimate body of the mate below following him and making their way forward, dodging the seas as best they might during the journey.

"I have been all this time in the mate's cabin," said the baronet, "using my utmost endeavours to restore animation, but, I keenly regret to say, without success. Captain, the poor fellow is dead!"

"I never thought otherwise from the first," said I, with a keen pang at this confirmation of my worst forebodings. "It is more than kind of you, Sir Edgar, to have taken so much trouble in the matter, and I am deeply grateful to you, the more so that it has been impossible for me to do anything for the poor fellow myself, the s.h.i.+p having demanded my whole attention from the moment when the squall first struck us. Well, he is at rest; his troubles are over; I believe he was a true and devout Christian, though he never made any ostentatious parade of his religion; and G.o.d will surely be gracious to him and accept his service of faithfully discharged duty and gentleness and blamelessness of life."

"Yes," said Sir Edgar, "a.s.suredly He will. After the story you told me of his trouble in the earlier hours of this eventful night I cannot help thinking that the very manner of the poor fellow's death was an evidence of G.o.d's mercy. It was His hand that struck him down; and I feel sure that the stroke was dealt in pity rather than in anger. One has only to look upon the dead man's face and observe the perfect tranquillity of its expression to be convinced that death was absolutely painless; he must have pa.s.sed the dread portal without knowing it. Meanwhile, how are we faring, captain? It seems to be blowing more furiously than ever; and are we not dangerously near the land?"

"I was seeking you to speak to you on the matter when you came on deck,"

said I. "It is my painful duty to inform you, Sir Edgar, that the s.h.i.+p is in a situation of extreme peril, and the time has arrived for us to prepare for the worst. I must ask you, therefore, to go below, arouse your family, bid them don a life-belt each--which they will find on a shelf at the head of their berths--wrap themselves in whatever they can lay hands on as a protection from the weather, and come on deck without delay. There is a formidable reef ahead of us; and, unless we can contrive to weather it, the s.h.i.+p will be on it and breaking-up within the next quarter of an hour!"

With an e.j.a.c.u.l.a.t.i.o.n of dismay Sir Edgar darted from my side and rushed to the cabin; and as he did so I gave the order to call the watch below.

The outer extremity of the reef--so far as we could trace it--now bore barely a point on our lee bow; and every sea that met us seemed to be sending us a good two fathoms to leeward. The hoa.r.s.e voice of the seaman forward who was calling the watch reached me brokenly through the deep bellowing of the gale and the loud seething of the boiling sea; and presently I could see, by the increased bulk of the group of crouching figures under the lee of the deck-house, that everybody was now out of the forecastle. The saloon party were scarcely less expeditious; for in a few minutes they, too, appeared on deck, wrapped in rugs and blankets s.n.a.t.c.hed hastily from the beds upon which they had been sleeping; and I at once disposed them as comfortably as I could on the deck, under the lee of the companion and skylight, where they would be in a measure sheltered from the flying spray.

Then, calling Mr Forbes, I bade him take two hands below to collect and bring on deck all the life-belts we could muster, and serve one out to each man. This was soon done; the life-buoys were cut loose and piled in a safe and convenient position on the p.o.o.p; and we were ready for any emergency. Nor were we any too soon; for we were now close upon the reef, while we had settled so far to leeward that it had become apparent to everybody that nothing short of a miracle could save us.

It was a bitter thought to me that, having brought the s.h.i.+p so far on her voyage, safely and prosperously, I was now about to lose her through what appeared to be nothing less than a cruel and malicious stroke of fortune. For if the gale had broken upon us during the hours of daylight, instead of in the darkness of night, we should undoubtedly have discovered the hazard of our position in time to have avoided running, as we had, blindly into this horrible death-trap. And not only should I lose the s.h.i.+p--a loss, it is true, that was to a great extent covered by insurance--but every sc.r.a.p of property that any of us possessed on board her would also undoubtedly become the prey of the devouring sea--for there was no hope of saving anything out of the s.h.i.+p if she once touched that reef--and, worst of all, there was only too great a probability that many precious lives would be lost; it seemed, indeed, very questionable whether _any_ of us could hope to escape the fury of that raging surf.

It was, however, no time for repining; still less for any yielding on my part to a feeling of despondency. I therefore called the hands under the lee of the long-boat, and in a few brief words stated to them our position, exhorted them with all the earnestness of which I was master to be cool and self-possessed at the critical moment, and to put their trust in the mercy of G.o.d; impressing upon them that only by such self-possession, coupled with promptest obedience to orders, could there be any hope of saving their lives; and I wound up by reminding them that there were women and children on board whose only hope of preservation lay in the courage and obedience which I now exhorted them to exercise.

As I completed my brief address the deep, thunderous boom of the sea upon the reef broke for the first time upon our ears, as though to warn us that the moment of trial was at hand; and, looking anxiously ahead, I saw that the outer extremity of the white water was already dead ahead of us, and that the s.h.i.+p was doomed!

"We shall never weather it, lads," I shouted; "we cannot possibly do it.

Stand by the braces, fore and main, and be ready to square the yards when I give the word to bear up. We shall have to run her in upon the beach, and take our chance of its being softer ground than the reef. As soon as you have squared the yards and caught a turn with the braces, come up on the p.o.o.p, all of you, and group yourselves well aft; it will be the safest part of the s.h.i.+p when she broaches to, and you will be out of the way of the falling masts. Take a firm grip of the most solid thing you can lay hold of, or the first sea that breaks over us will wash you overboard."

So saying, I sprang aft and stationed myself close to the little group of cowering women and children who were huddled together under the lee of the skylight, in readiness to afford such protection and help to them as might be possible in the impending desperate and almost hopeless struggle for life.

The final moment had now arrived; the white water was almost under the bows of the s.h.i.+p; another plunge or two would put the poor little craft plump upon the reef; and with a heavy heart I turned to the helmsman to give him the fatal sign. As I did so, a loud flap overhead and the simultaneous righting of the s.h.i.+p caused me to glance aloft in amazement and wonder as to what was happening. Could it be? By Heaven, yes! The wind had dropped, as if by magic, or a miracle, and for the moment there was a breathless calm, leaving us within fifty fathoms of the reef and, with the momentum of our rapid progress through the water, rus.h.i.+ng straight at it. Instinctively I bounded with one mad spring to the wheel, and, shouting to the bewildered man who held it, "_Hard down_, for your life!" I grasped the spokes, throwing the momentary strength of ten men into a frantic effort that sent the wheel whirling over at lightning speed. The n.o.ble little s.h.i.+p quickly and gallantly answered to the impulse, and, though pitching so desperately that she completely smothered herself as far aft as the foremast, her bows gradually swept round until they pointed straight out to seaward and away from the boiling surf that actually swirled and seethed about her cut.w.a.ter, as though the poor little overdriven craft had suddenly realised her awful peril and had swerved from it like a sentient thing.

"Man the braces, fore and main!" I shouted with frenzied eagerness.

"Round-in upon the starboard main and topsail braces, for your lives, men; s.h.i.+ft over the trysail-sheet like lightning! Hurrah, lads! over with it before the gale strikes us again! Well there with the starboard main-braces; haul taut and make fast to port; swing your head-yards; and get the starboard staysail sheet aft. Here comes the wind again; but, thank G.o.d, _we are saved_!"

No one but a sailor--and probably no sailor but he who has pa.s.sed through such an unique experience as I have just been endeavouring to describe--can possibly understand the startling suddenness and the astounding rapidity with which such an utterly unhoped-for and unexpected change had been wrought in our situation. The whole thing had happened with the breathless rapidity characteristic of the headlong rush of succeeding events in a dream. At the very moment when I was about to give the order which would have sent the s.h.i.+p flying before wind and sea towards the beach, and insured her destruction, there had occurred one of those sudden and unaccountable "breaks," or total cessations of wind, that occasionally, though very rarely, occur for a few brief moments in the midst of a raging tempest, and which are sometimes succeeded by a total change in the direction of the wind when it recommences to blow. These "breaks" are very similar in their character and duration to the pa.s.sage of "the eye" of a cyclone, with which phenomenon, indeed, they are often confounded; and it was during that brief lull that the helm had been put down, and the s.h.i.+p, by G.o.d's mercy--though plunging so wildly in the seas that met her that I fully expected to see her masts go over the bows--had been got round on the other tack, with her head pointing to seaward before the recurrence of the gale.

In the ecstasy of my delight and grat.i.tude at such a sudden and unlooked-for change in our situation I had cried aloud that we were saved; without waiting to see from what point the gale would come when it again struck us. Had it happened to have veered two or three points we should, as a matter of fact, have been just as badly off as before, for in that case the other headland or horn of the bay would soon have brought us up. Fortunately, however, the wind came away a trifle more free for us than it had hitherto been, so that when it again struck us the s.h.i.+p headed fairly well for the open sea. That sudden break, however, proved to be the beginning of the end; for though for perhaps a quarter of an hour it blew as furiously as ever, it then began to moderate rapidly; and the glorious, unclouded sun rose upon us as we were once more mast-heading our topsail-yards after loosing and setting the courses.

The safety of the s.h.i.+p once a.s.sured, I went below and entered the chief mate's cabin, to view the body and a.s.sure myself, beyond all possibility of doubt, of the fact of dissolution. A single look sufficed for this; for although only some six hours had elapsed since the poor fellow had been alive and hearty, there was already a distinct discolouration of the skin, to say nothing of other unmistakable signs that death had really taken place. Sailors are not, as a rule, given to much sentimentalism; they are so constantly being brought face to face with death that in a comparatively short time it loses much of that impressiveness with which it affects the landsman; but this man had been a true friend and comrade as well as a faithful servant to me, and I am not ashamed to acknowledge that the tears sprang to my eyes as I knelt by the side of the body and offered up a short prayer ere I looked my last upon him. This done, I returned to the deck and gave the necessary orders to have the body sewn in a hammock, and made ready for burial with all expedition.

I was by this time feeling somewhat f.a.gged, having been on deck for fully twenty-four hours, one-third of which time had been pa.s.sed in a state of great anxiety; having therefore answered for the present every call upon my attention, and satisfied myself that I could very well be spared for a few hours, I retired to my cabin, giving the steward orders to call me at four bells, at which hour I had arranged for the burial of poor Roberts having long before acquired the sailor's habit of falling asleep at a moment's notice, my head no sooner pressed the pillow than I sank into a sound and dreamless slumber.

At the appointed hour the steward awoke me; and on reaching the deck I was much moved and gratified to observe that not only were all hands on deck, "cleaned and s.h.i.+fted" in antic.i.p.ation of the mournful ceremony that lay before us, but also that Sir Edgar and his whole family intended to pay the last tribute of respect to the dead man, they having mustered upon the p.o.o.p in the nearest approach to mourning attire that their resources permitted. It is not my intention to here enter into a long and detailed description of the solemn and impressive rite that quickly followed; it has been done more than once or twice by far abler pens than mine, and is to be found in books that are read the wide world over. There is therefore no need for me to attempt to inform my readers upon a subject with which they are doubtless already sufficiently well acquainted; suffice it to say that no form or detail was omitted which could in any wise testify to our respect and esteem for our lost comrade and friend, or add to the decency and solemnity with which we consigned his body to its last resting-place _in_ the depths of the illimitable ocean. This done, I promoted Forbes to the position of chief mate; raised the boatswain to the dignity of "second officer;" and so brought the incident of poor Roberts's tragic fate to a close.

CHAPTER ELEVEN.

A GHASTLY WAIF OF THE SEA.

Our voyage had, thus far, proved to be an unusually eventful one; yet it was to be made the more notable ere its close by the addition of still one more incident, and that, too, of a sufficiently ghastly character, to the catalogue of those already recorded. It occurred on the tenth day after our brush with the Malays in the Straits of Sunda, and when we were about midway across the China Sea.

Since that wild night on which we had so nearly laid the bones of the _Esmeralda_--and possibly our own as well--to rest on the sh.o.r.es of Sumatra, we had met with uninterrupted bright suns.h.i.+ne and light, favourable breezes. The day on which the incident occurred was no exception to the rule. The weather was gloriously fine, with a rich, softly mottled sky of blue and white overhead, out of the midst of which the afternoon sun blazed fiercely down upon a smooth, sparkling sea, gently ruffling under the faint, warm breeze to a surface of pale, glowing sapphire, along which the barque, wooing the soft zephyr with studding-sails spread on both sides, from the royals down, swam with a sleepy, rhythmical swaying of her taunt spars, at a speed of some five knots in the hour.

It was close upon eight bells of the afternoon watch, and the saloon party were all on deck, grouped under the shadow of the awning; the elders lounging in easy, unconventional att.i.tudes in capacious basket-chairs, the women, attired in snowy white, beguiling the time by making a pretence at working at some embroidery, or fancy sewing of some kind, as they fitfully conversed upon such topics as occurred to them; while Sir Edgar, clothed in flannels, with a Panama hat tilted well forward over his eyes, smoked and read with an air of placid enjoyment; the youngsters, apparently less affected than the rest of us by the languorous heat of the weather, meanwhile indulging in a game at hide-and-seek about the decks with the s.h.i.+p's cat.

Of the hands forward, some of the watch were aloft, working at odd jobs about the rigging, while the drowsy clinking of a spunyarn winch somewhere on the forecastle, in the shadow of the head sails, accounted for the remainder. Most of the watch below were invisible; but two or three industrious ones had grouped themselves on the foredeck, in situations which secured at once a sufficiency of shadow and a maximum of breeze, and were smoking and chatting as they washed or repaired their clothing.

As for me, I was indulging in a brief spell of perfect bodily idleness, and had established myself in my own particular wicker chair, near the break of the p.o.o.p, and, with hands crossed behind my head and cigar in mouth, was lazily watching a man on the main-royal yard who was reeving a new set of signal halliards, while my mind was busy upon the apparently insoluble problem of finding the key to the cipher relating to Richard Saint Leger's buried treasure.

The signal halliards had just been successfully rove when eight bells were struck, and the man who had been reeving them--now off duty--was preparing leisurely to descend to the deck, when, as nine out of every ten sailors will, he paused to take a last, long, comprehensive look round the horizon. There was not a sail of any sort in sight from the deck, not even so much as the glancing of a bird's wing against the warm, tender, grey tones of the horizon to arrest one's wandering glances; but this was apparently not the case from the superior alt.i.tude of the main-royal yard, for presently I observed a change in the att.i.tude of the man up there from that of listless indifference to awakened curiosity and interest. His gaze grew earnest and attentive; then he shaded his eyes with his hand, and his body a.s.sumed an att.i.tude and expression of alertness. Long and steadily he maintained his gaze in one fixed direction; then he glanced down on deck, and, catching sight of me with my face upturned toward him, he hailed--

"On deck, there! There's something away out here on the starboard bow, sir, as has the look of a boat adrift."

"How does it bear, and how far off is it?" I inquired.

"About two points on the starboard bow, and a matter of eight or ten mile off, I should say, sir," was the reply.

"Mr Forbes," said I to the mate, who, the watch having just been called, at this moment came on deck from his cabin, "take the gla.s.s aloft, and see what you can make of this new wonder, if you please."

Forbes went to the companion, took the telescope out of the beckets, slung it over his shoulders, and leisurely ascended the fore-rigging until he reached the topmast cross-trees, in which he comfortably settled himself preparatory to a careful inspection of the object.

Meanwhile, the other man maintained his position on the main-royal yard.

"Now then, Joe, where do you say this precious 'something' of yours is?"