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I nodded. Something about Maria made me like her. I didn't know if it was her smile, or the how she so comfortably spoke to me. There was something there though.
"Okay, this is your room."
She pushed open a curtain. Inside rested a small bed, blankets folded neatly on its padded mattress. It barely stood off the ground, propped up on a few thick boards. A small table with a single drawer sat wedged in next to the bed, an old lamp sitting on its rough surface. At the other end of the bed stood a small set of drawers. Aside from that, the room was empty. Everything was crowded close together, the only remaining floor s.p.a.ce barely big enough to spin on. Everything in the room seemed to be embraced in the deep brown of the wooden walls.
"It isn't much," Maria said, watching me take in the room. "But hey, it is home, si?"
Maria couldn't see the relief that was flowing through me. I scanned the room again, taking in the one thing that made a smile finally creep across my face. There was no bunk. No other bed. I had never slept in a room all to myself in my life. It seemed too good to be true.
Walking in, I set my box and bag on the bed. "No, it's perfect," I said softly.
"Okay. Well, unpack then come ouside. Si?"
I nodded.
Maria turned to leave. Before she could duck through the curtain, I stopped her. "What did you ask him? Oscar." Maria turned and looked at me, a smile still on her full lips. "Out there... I was just curious."
"Don't know much Espanol, huh?" Maria leaned against the doorway, her smile easy and welcoming. "I asked him if he was afraid of the pretty new girl."
"Oh." I looked away, staring at her feet instead of her laughing smile. "Is he?"
Maria laughed. "Millie, don't worry. Oscar is afraid of everything. Even his own shadow." I glanced back up at her. She winked playfully, pus.h.i.+ng her body away from the door frame. "Just relax. Everyone is loco at first. We get used to it though. Most of the time. See you outside, chica."
Maria watched a moment longer, then turned and left. As soon as she disappeared through the curtain, I dumped out the contents of my small bag onto the bed and set to work sifting through them. Picking up the sock that held my sea gla.s.s, I paused a moment. I could feel the lump of the gla.s.s in the toe. I wanted to look at it again. To roll it between my fingers and try to hear the soft waves that had created it years before.
Sighing, I grabbed the envelope of cash and pushed it into the sock on top of the gla.s.s. Rolling the top of the sock shut tightly, I gathered my used clothes and walked over to the small dresser. I carefully laid out my clothing in the first drawer, making sure it was folded neatly and organized.
I walked back to my bed and ripped the top of the box open, then pulled out the new set of clothing. The s.h.i.+rt was a dark blue, the pants a light khaki covered in pockets. I stared at them a moment, my fingers trailing over the new fabric that almost seemed to crunch under my touch, then carefully folded them and laid them in their place in the open dresser drawer. I gathered up the extra socks and underwear and toiletries and tucked them all away too, then pushed the drawer shut.
All that was left on the bed now was my notebook and the empty cardboard box. I fiddled with the box a moment, then finally found a way to collapse it. Not knowing what to do with it, I kicked it under my bed. The cardboard sc.r.a.ped across the wood floor, then fell silent as it found its place in the shadows and dust.
I walked over to the head of the bed and finally let myself sit. The springs in the bed bounced back at me. I could feel them under my body, jabbing and poking, but it didn't matter. The bed felt like complete luxury. I took in a deep breath, letting my eyes scan the tiny room once more.
My room.
Without pausing to flip through the ratty pages, I slipped my notebook into the drawer on the bedside table, then rose and walked out of the room. The hallway was narrow, barely big enough for two people to stand side by side. I could see Maria leaning in the doorway, and made my way to her.
As I drew closer I could hear her talking to someone. Maria was laughing, her shoulders rising and falling happily. I reached her, unsure of whether I should wait or let her know I was there. I ended up standing awkwardly in the shadows, s.h.i.+fting my weight from foot to foot like a nervous child. I could hear the rumble of a man talking to her, his voice light and joking.
Maria laughed again. "Senor Reed, really. You will be kicked out of here faster than you know if you keep that up."
"Keep what up?" he asked, his voice pure and innocent. Maria chuckled again. "Um, you have someone. There. Behind you," Reed added, his voice still soft.
Maria looked over her shoulder, smiling at me. "Come on out, Millie. Come on. Rapido."
Stepping down out of the doorway, she motioned with her hands for me to follow. I took a step out, blinking in the bright sunlight. It took me a moment to adjust. I wasn't used to being out in the sun this much in one day.
I finally stopped blinking. A young man stood in front of me, leaning against the wall of my living quarters. He was tall, his body lean and his skin tanned a rich brown. Dark brown hair hung slightly s.h.a.ggy on his smooth forehead. He smiled at me, his deep brown eyes light and happy.
"Hey there," he said. Taking a step forward, he held out a hand and waited. I watched him a moment, then I held out my hand and let him take a hold of it, gently shaking. "I'm Reed. Looks like I get you."
"Get me?" I asked, alarmed.
Reed furrowed his brows together a moment, then suddenly shot his eyes open in realization. "Oh, no. No, not like that." He laughed softly to himself, shaking his head as he kept his eyes on me. They had lost a bit of their humor, now studying me closely instead. "No, I get to show you the ropes. You know, the job."
I lowered my eyes, my cheeks suddenly burning. "Oh," I said simply.
Reed said a few more words to Maria, but I didn't bother to listen. I felt young and naive. As if I shouldn't be there at all. Everyone seemed so relaxed and comfortable as they joked and walked past in the warm sunlight. Meanwhile I stood there, waiting for a fight to break out at any moment and for the thump of heavy boots as guards ran in from the shadows to break up the chaos.
"Hey?" I snapped out of my thoughts, seeing Reed watching me. His brows were still slightly furrowed, barely wrinkling his smooth forehead. "Ready?" He must have asked me already. The tone of his voice sounded repeated, almost exhausted.
"I am. I'm sorry."
"Hey, don't be sorry. You're new here. You're allowed to get lost in the fog a bit."
I paused again, staring at him. I had never told anyone about the fog that clouded my mind and memories. My mouth hung open, my thoughts racing to think of what to say. It was probably coincidence, that Reed had mentioned fog. But the way he looked back into my eyes didn't settle my suddenly racing heart.
Reed smiled, then started to walk away down the dirt path. I hurried to follow. We pa.s.sed the small buildings, most empty now as the other workers made their way to their jobs. I found myself curious about what I would be doing for the next month, if not longer, of my life.
We finally left the gathering of small houses. Ahead of us stretched an orchard. Trees, full of bright green leaves, stretched up to the sky, casting s.h.i.+fting shadows on the gra.s.s below. As we got closer I saw that the branches of the trees were heavy with dark red apples.
Apples. I sighed. Of course it was apples.
Reed bent and picked up two baskets from a stack near the entrance to the orchard. Handing me one, he continued to walk, ducking under a few low hanging branches. I tucked the basket under my arm and hurried to keep up.
A few workers nearby called greetings to Reed as we pa.s.sed, then went back to their work. They stood tiptoe on step ladders, reaching into the branches to pluck the apples and drop them into their baskets. A few were high in the branches, the only sign of their existence being a random flash of arms and legs as the leaves moved in the breeze.
Reed grabbed a step-ladder and leaned it up against a tree trunk. Slinging a strap from the basket around his shoulders, he jumped up into the tree, disappearing into the branches. I watched him climb up, my mouth slightly gaping in awe at how fearless he seemed as he scaled the tree.
I carefully stepped up on the ladder, feeling it wobble beneath my feet. Placing my hand against the tree trunk, I waited for the shaking to calm. The bark was cool under my hand. I caressed my fingers along its rough divots, feeling the b.u.mps and curves of the wood press back against my skin. My fingers inched along the bark. They carefully explored the dips and rough edges, a small smile spreading on my face as the sun-warmed bark snagged on my fingertips. I had never touched a tree before.
"The tree feels loved."
I jumped. Looking up, I could barely see Reed's face through the branches. He smiled at me. The thump of apples echoed down to me as he dropped them into his basket.
My cheeks burned again in embarra.s.sment.
I stepped up to the top step. Reaching up, I plucked an apple from a low hanging branch and tossed it into my basket. It rolled around, finally coming to a stop as it settled. I picked another one, throwing it in to begin its circle of rolling.
My stomach growled. I hadn't eaten since breakfast the day before. I could feel my head swim as my mouth started to water. I plucked another apple, then leaned against the trunk to look at its red surface. It shone in the sun light. The apple seemed to taunt me, daring me to bite into its red flesh. I thought of the mealy apples the prison always served, the dry taste on my tongue as the browned meat crunched in my mouth. I hated apples.
My stomach growled again.
Gritting my teeth, I lifted the apple to my mouth.
Before I could take a bite, a hand clamped down on my wrist. I looked up. Reed was hanging in front of me, his body wrapped around the branches to keep from falling. One hand gripped my wrist, his eyes bearing into me in alarm as his grasp tightened.
"What are you doing?" he asked, his voice strangely scared.
"I'm... I'm hungry. I was just going to eat an apple."
Reed jumped down from his perch, landing with a thump on the gra.s.sy ground. He reached up and took the apple from my hand, letting it drop into my nearly empty basket. Leaning in close to me, he looked around once before bearing his eyes into mine.
"You can't do that, Millie," he said, his voice soft and low. "These apples are property of whoever is buying them. They are owned. There are tons of contracts wrapped around these apples. None of which are signed by you."
"So?" I asked. "It's an apple. There are hundreds in the tree." I looked up as if to rea.s.sure myself. The tree seemed to answer me by shaking in the breeze, its branches hung heavy with the red apples.
"Theft. Have you heard of that?" Reed leaned closer, his voice low. "Well, that's what you will get slapped with if you decide to eat these apples. Along with whatever else they decide to add to the charge. This is serious, Millie. Take some notes, got it?"
I looked down in the basket. "But..."
Reed rubbed a hand across his face. "You grew up in the prison. How many people in there did you hear claim they were not guilty? That what they did wasn't wrong?" He raised his eyebrows to me. I parted my lips to answer, but no words came out. Reed motioned to the basket of apples. "Those are owned. By someone. I don't know who but I know it's not you or me. All we are supposed to do is pick the apples and put them in these baskets. Eat one, and you will go right back to Spokane."
I couldn't believe what I heard. Eating an apple wasn't a crime. The trees were full with the apples, waiting to be plucked and sold and eaten by others with growling stomachs. The dead cool seriousness of Reed's face let me know he was telling the truth.
I had almost broken the law. A law I never even knew existed.
13.
Reed climbed back into the tree. I could feel him occasionally glancing at me, and I tried to focus on my apple picking as if I couldn't feel his eyes checking in on my every move. I knew he was just worried, but I wished he would stop checking. I wasn't going to eat an apple, at all. All his constant checking only set me further on edge. Reaching up, I plucked forbidden apple after apple, dropping them into my basket.
People in nearby trees casually talked and laughed. It was strange to see how relaxed they all were, sitting in trees in the suns.h.i.+ne and filling baskets as if they never had a fear or care in the world. I could hear the rhythmic thumping of the apples as Reed tossed them into his basket high above me. Letting out a breath, I leaned against the tree, one hand mindlessly stroking the bark as I watched the sunlight trickle down through the leaves.
"Well now, Reed. It looks like our tree is needing a room of its own with this new young lady here." Someone walked around the tree, leaning casually against it. He smiled at me, then winked. "Pity. Wouldn't mind a room of our own." I suddenly felt my throat tighten as Carl's face flashed before my eyes.
"With her, or the tree?" Reed called from the branches, his voice light with laughter.
"The tree, of course!" The new man winked at me again. "I like them st.u.r.dy."
Reed jumped down from the tree, landing heavily on his feet. He stumbled forward a step, his hands reaching forward to brace himself. The man jumped forward and caught Reed just before he face planted.
"Whoa there man. Don't wanna push the Insurance." The man said, laughing as he hauled Reed to his feet. He stood a few inches taller than Reed, his bright red hair a startling contrast to Reed's deep brown. He was slim like Reed, but his shoulders and chest were broader, thick with muscles. The man slapped a hand on Reed's back.
Reed slapped him back, chuckling. "Thanks Eddie." He paused, glancing at me, then back to Eddie. "Eddie, this is Millie."
Eddie looked at me, an amused smile creeping across his lips. "Millie." He leaned forward, his voice suddenly coming out in a loud, mocking whisper. "Need some alone time?" Eddie flitted his eyes back to the apple tree, then winked at me.
I could feel my cheeks burning. Opening my mouth to answer, I suddenly felt tongue-tied, unsure of how to answer his remark. Reed looked at my face a moment, then slapped his friend upside the head.
"Eddie, come on man. Millie is a recent Out."
"Really?" Eddie took a step forward, his eyes wide as he took me in.
"Yeah. Give her a break, okay? Probably the first time she has seen a real tree."
Eddie's eyes widened even more, if that was possible. "Is that true?"
I glanced at Reed. He was shaking his head at Eddie, his eyes rolling in mock annoyance. Meeting eyes with me, Reed shook his head and shrugged in apology. "Well, no. I've seen them," I answered. "I've just never... touched one."
My cheeks still burned. I was in awe of a tree, as everyone else around me walked past through the Orchard without a second glance. How much more obviously different could I get? Eddie opened his mouth to say something else, but Reed suddenly smacked him again, hard enough this time to cause Eddie to let out a choked cough. Reed smiled at me, then shot a look to Eddie. Sighing, Eddie rolled his eyes and slumped against the tree.
"It's alright, Millie," Reed said, taking a step closer to me. I could smell his light sweat on his body and something like peppermint every time he opened his mouth. "We get Outs here pretty often. They all do what you are doing. It's normal." Reed offered me a smile, lifting a hand to softly touch my arm. I tried to smile back, but only managed a weak grin.
"I feel so out of place," I admitted, shocked at the words as they tumbled from my lips.
"Don't feel that way," Reed said. "You belong here."
"Yeah you do." Eddie stepped up to us, a smile on his freckled face. Reed lowered his hand from my arm, the spot he had touched still warm as he took a step back. "And the tree knows it!"
"Eddie, honestly man." Reed couldn't help but laugh. I watched as his shoulders shook up and down, his white teeth flas.h.i.+ng in honest laughter. A small chuckle escaped my lips. Reed reached over and playfully smacked Eddie on the arm again.
"So, Millie, care to have chow with us?" Eddie casually asked, rubbing at his shoulder where Reed had hit him. He folded his thick arms across his chest. "I hear it's gonna be the oh-so-delicious usual of veggie stew and baked rolls."
My mouth started to water, my stomach growling in anxious agreement. Hoping that Reed and Eddie hadn't heard, I quickly picked up my basket and held it tight against my demanding stomach. "Sure," I said, the smile still on my lips.
"Awesome," Eddie said, winking his eye at me again before jumping up and clamping a hand on Reed's shoulder. "Shall we?"
The flames of the fire rose and licked the air, dancing as they grew and shrank in the light breeze. I couldn't stop staring. The countless nights of sitting huddled on the cold prison floor in front of the barely glowing light dimmed in my memory as I stared into the dancing flames. It was mesmerizing. Others around me casually lounged on the ground or on stools. I could hear the clink of spoons against metal bowls, and my stomach growled again.
"Here you go," Reed said as he sat beside me.
He held a small metal bowl, full to the brim with soup. I could see chunks of potatoes and carrots floating in the thick broth. Gratefully taking it from his hand, I held it in my lap, feeling the warmth from the bowl throb in my chilled hands. It had become cold very fast as soon as the sun began to set.
Eddie plopped down next to Reed. In one hand he had his bowl, in the other a plate piled high with rolls. I could smell their fresh baked dough drifting through the air. Steam still rose off of their golden crusts.
Seeing me eye the rolls, Reed picked one up and offered it to me. I smiled at him, taking it carefully from his hand and setting it on my lap. I was almost afraid to eat the food. It seemed too good. Too warm and delicious smelling.
"Don't get used to it," Eddie said, his mouth already full. "Da rolls are usually cold." He shoved another roll in his mouth, an audible groan of happiness escaping his lips as he shut his eyes and loudly chewed. I couldn't help but smile.
"And the carrots aren't always available," Reed added. "It's been a good season on the other farms."
I nodded. I looked at the soup again. Stirring my spoon slowly, I watched the carrots and potatoes spin. "At least it isn't apples."
Both of the men laughed. "What, not an apple fan?" Eddie asked.
I shook my head and shrugged. "I never have been. Something about their texture. Or something."
"Bad luck," Eddie said, obviously amused. Reed shot him a look, then let a chuckle escape his own lips as Eddie innocently batted his eyelashes in mock apology.
"So Reed, any news on the new buyer?" Eddie asked.