The Wraiths Of Will And Pleasure Part 20

'The offering should be blood, not yours or Mima's, as you've already given, but mine or Lormy's.'

Flick's flesh went cold for a moment as Lileem innocently put her request to Ulaume, presumably because she was a little frightened of the cruel agave. Flick expected Ulaume to glance at him contemptuously and say something like, 'Now who's been filling your head with this rubbish?' Instead, because he was gradually proving himself to be a creature of surprises, he said, 'Tell me about it.' His strong brown hands worked dextrously with the agave. Of all of them, he had received no wounds.

Lileem described Agave and his preferences in terms of offerings, then said gravely, 'Flick has seen the dehara, the G.o.ds. We see them together now. They are pouring out of the stars.'

'The Kakkahaar have a dehar,' Ulaume said. 'His name is Hubisag, and he sounds similar to your Agave.'

'I remember you calling on him,' Lileem said, 'though you don't do that now.'

'I am far from home,' Ulaume said, 'and in a landscape of agave. I will acknowledge its G.o.d, if that is what it takes.' Now he looked at Flick directly. 'I danced in Hubisag's honour for my tribe. Perhaps I miss it. I like these ideas you have. They make sense.'

Astounded, Flick could only nod and turn away feeling embarra.s.sed. Ulaume's approval was somehow worse than his scorn.

Much to her annoyance, Lileem was told to remain at the white house while the rest of them went hunting. 'You might be a prodigy,' Ulaume said, 'but you're still a child and you've never done anything like this. Show your maturity now and accept you might mess things up.'

Grudgingly, she agreed, and watched the rest of them forlornly from the lighted window as they crept down the hill. It was clear in her face she was aggrieved to miss the nearest thing to an adventure since Flick had arrived at the settlement.

Mima had brought a more sumptuous meal than usual: a whole freshly cooked chicken in herbs, which filled the night air with mouth-watering fragrance. This she laid down in the usual place and the three of them took up their positions, each armed with an improvised blow gun, created from some hollow metal tubing Flick had found in the stable block behind the house. The guns were armed with agave darts. They waited for most of the night and Flick was beginning to think that Terez was wise to them and wouldn't show, when his senses detected a furtive movement in a stand of sumac bushes. The movements came closer to his position, shaking the leaves of a feathery esperanza. He became utterly still and strained all of his senses out into the darkness. He could sense also the alert tension of his companions. Suddenly there was a soft rus.h.i.+ng sound and the esperanza shook violently. Someone, possibly Mima, had fired a dart.

Flick saw a dark scrabbling shape emerge from the bushes and scuttle on all fours across a narrow open s.p.a.ce, heading for the other side of the settlement. He was too far away to fire, but then the shape jerked almost upright, its feet leaving the ground. It uttered an enraged shriek and tried to run. At that moment, Ulaume dropped down from his hiding place on one of the roofs, clearly having fired a dart. Terez was so quick, like a monstrous spider. Flick saw a brief struggle, heard a cry. There seemed to be a dark, noxious smoke hanging over the whole scene, and Flick feared that Ulaume would be consumed by it. A sickly putrid smell like rotting vegetation filled the air. Flick called out, and his voice sounded low and slurred. Ulaume snarled and cursed, then Terez had managed to wriggle away from him. Like a black wraith, he shot off into the shadows between the buildings.

'd.a.m.n!' Flick said aloud.

Mima jumped across from a neighbouring roof, wiped her upper lip, which was sweating. 'I think he took Ulaume's dart. We can follow.'

She leapt down to the ground, landing on all fours, her hair swinging wildly as she glanced around her. Quickly, she glanced up at Flick. 'Come on on!'

It was her brother they were trying to capture. Her only surviving brother, in whatever form he took.

Flick jumped down beside her. Close by, Ulaume was trying to examine the top of his right arm by starlight. 'Bit me,' he said, 'felt like to the bone.'

'Which way did he go?' Mima asked.

'He'll have got away by now,' Flick said.

'No, he took the dart in the neck,' Ulaume said. 'I saw it.'

'Which way?' Mima almost screamed.

Ulaume indicated with a jerk of his head. 'That way.'

She was gone in an instant.

Ulaume crumpled to his knees in the dirt, holding on his arm. 'That thing smacked me in the head too. It has a lot of strength.'

Flick squatted down beside him. 'You should go back to the house. Clean the wound. Get Lileem to give you some healing. I'll go and find Mima.'

'Be careful,' Ulaume said. 'That thing's unnatural.'

Flick stood up, but hesitated before following Mima.

'I know what you're thinking and you're right,' Ulaume said. 'This was a stupid idea. You don't know what you're messing with.'

'It is our responsibility,' Flick said. 'You know that.'

'It's a big one, Flick. If you catch the thing, it's only the beginning. By Hubisag, even just being near it makes me sick.'

Flick found them on the porch of one of the buildings. Dawn had begun to grey the sky and the light was magical and strange. Mima was hunched over an awkward tangle of splayed limbs. She was rocking back and forth, weeping, her hands over her nose in a position like prayer. From yards away, Flick gagged on the stench. He steeled himself and approached, reaching out a hand to Mima's shoulder. It felt hard and bony beneath his fingers. For a moment, he was back in time, comforting Pell when he was so afraid of inception. Flick closed his eyes, willed himself back to the present. He had to keep swallowing to keep himself from vomiting. Terez was semi-conscious, viscous fluid leaking from his upturned eyes. His skin was a ma.s.s of sores, which can sometimes happen during althaia, but they had never healed. He had never risen reborn from inception, as perfect har, but had lingered in some abominable hinterland. What remained was like the dark soul of Wraeththu, the terrible things that hid deep inside. And what now? And what now? Flick asked himself. Flick asked himself.

'He needs a transfusion, we have to find a way,' he said.

Mima looked round at him then. 'It's too late, isn't it? I've never been this close. Oh G.o.d!'

'We began this,' Flick said. 'We finish it. Help me carry him.'

'Back to the house?'

'Where else? You want him back, Mima. We start by bringing him into our fold.'

'But Lileem...'

'Lileem is far more robust than any of us. She can take this, probably better than we can. She'll be of help. We don't have to worry about her.'

He hoped he was right.

Chapter Fifteen.

Over the following weeks, Flick wished many times that he had Orien or Seel to turn to for advice. As Ulaume had told him, he was out of his depth, but felt he had to carry on. They had to keep Terez sedated all the time, because on the only occasion they let him surface to full consciousness, he tore up the room he was being kept in and smeared excrement around the walls. To Flick, Terez was like a mad monkey, uncontrollable, spiteful and sly. He was also very strong. It was hard to feel pity for this creature, who screamed the entire time he was awake and emitted foul fluids from every orifice when asleep. Flick did not know how to give a transfusion, the best he could manage was to cut his own arm and press it against a similar wound he made on Terez. Every day he looked for improvements, and it seemed that Terez's skin was slightly clearer and Mima was sure he was putting on weight, but his mind would not come back.

Once, Ulaume said to Flick in private, 'You know what we should do. A pillow. It'd be quick. Better than this living death.'

But Flick could not give up. Perhaps Saltrock sensibilities could not concur with those of the Kakkahaar, but he felt there must be hope. He resorted to something that he felt was bound to work by letting Lileem put her hands on Terez. She sat cross-legged behind his head, her fingers resting lightly on his twisted face. Surely the innocent purity of a child would reach and heal him? It seemed not.

'What do you think?' Flick asked Lileem, as she sat, lips pursed, brow furrowed, concentrating on the sick creature before her.

'He is similar to how Mima was,' she answered. 'His mind is far away.' She glanced up. 'He will never be like you.'

Flick had been telling himself that he was looking for some signs of improvement before he considered the arunic aspects of Terez's condition. He realised now it was something he was trying to avoid. Everyhar knew or at least had been told that aruna after althaia somehow made permanent the changes of inception. If only he knew more about the mechanics of it what exactly aruna did. Was it to do with receiving the energy or essence of another har, or chemical changes within the inceptee's body stimulated by the act itself?

To Ulaume, it was becoming increasingly obvious that he must intervene in the Terez situation. He harboured resentments for Flick, the har who had swept into his life and taken over his household. He couldn't deny the benefits of Flick's presence, but he had a prejudice against Sarocks that was difficult to dispel. Ulaume had come to care for Mima, and Flick was wrong in a.s.suming that Ulaume hadn't thought long and deeply about what should be done for Terez. Ulaume had simply come to the conclusion that he could do nothing alone and that Flick couldn't, either. Neither could Mima or Lileem a.s.sist.

Ulaume knew there was only one thing they could try. He wasn't sure it would work in the way that everyone would want or that a perfect har would arise from the husk of Terez afterwards. He wasn't sure if his idea wasn't dangerous. But at night, he had to listen to Mima weeping softly in the room next to his own, or hear her pacing the creaking floorboards, and he knew that eventually he would have to do something. It would mean thawing with Flick and that was the second thing that prevented him acting, because Ulaume took a long time to forgive or to drop a grudge. Flick reminded him of what he considered to be the worst aspects of Pell. They didn't look that similar, but there was a certain manner and att.i.tude, presumably deriving from Saltrock inception itself, that they shared. Capable, industrious, considerate and disciplined. Perhaps the opposite of everything Ulaume thought himself to be. But in this instance, the combination of personalities, however at odds, might work in Terez's favour. No doubt, if Terez could be healed, he would be another fawning devotee of the accomplished Flick, which would be extremely annoying, but if it brought harmony back to the house, then it would be worth it.

Once the decision was made, Ulaume brooded over it for several days, chewing each detail in his mind to try and divine possible outcomes. Lileem knew he was considering something important, because she kept casting him knowing glances, but he'd reveal nothing to her. He and Flick must do this alone. It was their territory.

One evening, while Mima and Lileem addressed the unpleasant task of feeding and cleaning Terez, Ulaume went into the kitchen and found Flick there, cleaning Ghost's saddle and bridle by lamplight. The mere sight of this industry initiated a spasm of annoyance in Ulaume's heart, but he gritted his teeth and went to sit opposite Flick at the table. Flick glanced up, smiled tightly. Ulaume could feel discomfort pouring off his skin. Flick hated to be alone with him.

'This Terez business has gone on for over a month now,' Ulaume said. 'The meal of blood did not work, and neither have your other experiments.'

Flick shrugged awkwardly. 'There is a gradual improvement. His skin is clearing and he's put on a bit of weight.'

'Don't kid yourself,' Ulaume said. He paused, then added, 'There is is something else we could do.' something else we could do.'

Flick's hands fell idle. 'Has it anything to do with pillows, poison or blades?'

Ulaume smiled. 'No, not at all. It might work, it might not. I don't think we could guarantee what would come out of it, but we could try.'

'What do you mean?'

'Grissecon,' Ulaume said. 'Ritual aruna to create a healing elixir.'

Flick began cleaning the bridle again, perhaps with too much concentration for such a mundane task. 'I've seen that done, but it takes hara of high caste to do it. I've never done anything like that.'

'I have. Not for healing exactly, but I'm familiar with the process.'

Flick's brow was furrowed and his face was flushed. Ulaume had never seen a har so riddled with discomfort. 'We are not friends, I know,' he said, 'and this won't come easy. But you were the one so keen to do something about Terez, and this is a possible solution. Are you no longer prepared to try anything?'

'I don't think you mean it,' Flick said suddenly, throwing down the bridle in a clatter of harness buckles. 'I think this is just another way to make life difficult for me here. Maybe a Kakkahaar can take aruna with somehar they despise, and maybe you know I can't. I'm not stupid.'

'I didn't realise you despised me. Thanks for being so honest.' Ulaume couldn't help laughing.

'I don't...' Flick shook his head. 'I didn't expect this. Not from you. I can't help but suspect your motives.'

'The motive is to help Mima. Not sure about Terez, because I'm still not convinced he isn't beyond help. But if there is a chance, we should perhaps take it.' He paused. 'Wouldn't Pell want us to do this?'

'That's low,' Flick said.

'Not at all. It's the truth. I can't believe I'm trying to persuade you to do this. I don't have to. I don't have to listen to insults.' He stood up.

'Give me time,' Flick said. 'I have to think about this.'

'We are Wraeththu,' Ulaume said. 'Perhaps we have forgotten that, living here. We have run away from our lives, and we have tried to detach ourselves from all that we were. But you were the one who said Terez was our responsibility. You were the one who wanted to help him. The rest of us are just living with the consequences, and they are not pleasant. That is what you should think about.'

Ulaume left the room before Flick could say any more.

The following day, Ulaume avoided Flick to give him s.p.a.ce to think. He had to admit to himself that the idea of becoming close to another har again was not without its delights, even if that har was Flick. He was physically very attractive, despite his annoying traits. Ulaume had trained himself not to miss aruna, but the desire was always there, deep within. If we do this If we do this, Ulaume thought, it will initiate many things. It will create changes. it will initiate many things. It will create changes.

Perhaps these were needed changes. Ulaume believed Flick wanted their home to become the new Saltrock. Many times, the possibilities of other hara finding them there had been discussed, albeit lightly. Ulaume knew that Lileem desperately wanted it to happen.

Before dinner, Ulaume went outside to watch the sunset. A beautiful purple red light tinged the land. Cicadas purred in the acacia trees and the coyote made her song to the night. In the early days, Ulaume had thought the animal might become a sort of dog-like pet, but once they'd moved into the house, she'd gone back to her wild ways. Sometimes they heard and saw her, but the time they'd been almost like friends had long gone. She'd had a small but important part to play in their little drama, but now it was over.

Flick came out of the house, wiping his hands, which were damp from peeling vegetables, on a ragged towel. Already, appetising smells were drifting out of the kitchen window. Flick sat down beside Ulaume on a shallow flight of ornamental steps that led to a pond with a dry fountain. He cupped his chin with his hands, his elbows resting on his raised knees. 'When?' he said.

Ulaume pointed up at the sky where a waxing moon pulled herself out of the distant cordillera. 'Anytime between now and the full moon,' he said. 'You know that.'

'Hmm.' Flick s.h.i.+fted uneasily. 'Tell me what you propose, apart from the obvious.'

'Outside, at the falls. It is a good place. We call upon one of your dehara you should decide which one and how to address them and we tell them what we want to do and ask for their help. Then, we perform the Grissecon. It's not that different from any other ritual really, apart from the aruna aspect. I will be ouana, you soume. That seems the best approach.'

Flick nodded slowly. 'I can see that. Should we tell the others?'

'We tell Mima we are doing something, but mustn't get her hopes up too high. We will ask her to keep Lileem inside, who will be bursting with curiosity to observe. I would prefer to do this without an audience.'

'Me too!' Flick exclaimed. He rubbed his nose with both hands. 'Tomorrow night. That will give me time to write something down. I need to think about it.'

'You spend too much time thinking, but OK. Put some ideas together and show them to me.'

'The only rituals I've done here with the dehara have been with Lileem and they were just light, nothing much. This will require something more powerful and focused.'

'Good practice, then. You'd better see to dinner. I can smell burning.'

As Ulaume thought, the mere mention of a new idea to help Terez caused Mima to become a fountain of hope. He trusted he and Flick wouldn't disappoint her. Somehow, he didn't think they could fail. This Grissecon would involve a sacrifice, that of their own feelings towards one another, and he was sure this would empower the ritual. 'Sit with Terez,' Ulaume said to Mima. 'You and Lileem can concentrate on his well-being. I think it will aid what Flick and I intend to do.'

Mima, who never touched anyone impulsively apart from Lileem, wrapped Ulaume in a quick, fierce embrace. 'Thank you,' she said. 'I know what this must be costing you.'

'Actually, you have no idea,' he said lightly. 'It's a cost I'm willing to pay.'

Over a frugal dinner of salad and water, Flick produced his ideas for the ritual. Mima had already taken Lileem to Terez's room.

'I thought that Aruhani should be the focus to start with,' Flick said, 'but then decided it should be Miyacala, who is the dehar most a.s.sociated with inception. We must ask him to guide Terez back into himself, to complete the process that was arrested.' He glanced at Ulaume. 'You must use your knowledge to create the elixir.'

'We should alter our state of consciousness,' Ulaume said. 'Usually, Grissecon is an elaborate event, with drummers, shamanic trance, the lot. We shall have to improvise.'

'I have something we could use,' Flick said. 'A fungus that grows in the desert caves. I've used it before.'

Ulaume pushed his plate away from him. 'I'm still hungry, so that should aid the process.'

Flick exhaled a shuddering breath. 'I'll prepare it now,' he said. 'We should get going.'

He stood abruptly, knocking the table with his hip so that a gla.s.s fell over.

'Calm down,' Ulaume said. 'You are a jangle of nerves. You're making me nervous.'

Flick mixed up a fairly noxious brew and he and Ulaume sat at the table to drink it. Flick was tense and silent and Ulaume was almost amused at how much of a trial this seemed to be for him. On the other hand, it wasn't very flattering either.

When the drinks were finished, Flick clasped his hands on the tabletop. 'Is this the reason we're here?' he asked. 'For Terez?'

'For him, for Lileem, for Mima who knows? Maybe all three. Maybe there is no reason and everything is coincidence.'

'You and I meeting here? Coincidence?'

Ulaume sighed through his nose. 'Let's go.'