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I yielded to his bottomless calm and interested brown eyes. I ate the cookie and told him about my visit with Pluvia and Wanda and my failure to win over Gettler with my plan to trap Jeff and Tom. "I'm sure that someone else is using them as cats' paws. When those guys were leaving my house, Jeff said they'd better hurry up or they'd catch h.e.l.l. I wondered who would be p.i.s.sed off at them. It has to be whoever's taking Jerome's place in their lives."
He absorbed this. "I've wondered how those two managed to evade the law so long. Someone helping them makes sense."
My hands were on the table wrapped in an iron grip around my coffee mug. He put his hands on each side of mine, a mini-hug. "Slow down and let the solutions develop. Wait and watch for awhile. Less dangerous, for one thing."
I promised to consider that strategy. I felt better and it wasn't just caffeine and calories. He made me feel calmer and less frantic about the mess my life was in. I'd always been drawn to men who brought a challenge, a dash of risk, men who got my pulse pounding. Not men who slowed it down and made me feel safe. Calm and caution-would that evolve into "boring"? Might take awhile to find out.
I'd try following his advice, "wait and watch," only because, for the life of me, I couldn't think of a single thing to do.
Chapter Twenty-eight.
Wednesday, aside from concern about Denny, Calvin seemed unusually cheerful as well as casual about the work. I didn't feel his eyes on me as I prepared the diets. He didn't seem at all worried about how many meal worms in this pan, whether the fruit was cut to the right size in that pan, what size the slivers of fish were. He acted as though I knew how to do it perfectly, and he could relax and putter around. It was unnerving.
At morning break, he disappeared. I called Marcie and learned that Denny was talking a little when he was awake. His meds had been changed, but I didn't follow the details. "I'll come after work."
Marcie said, "There's no point-he's asleep most of the time."
"Can I spell you or bring anything?"
"No, I'm fine, thanks."
This was her project, her realm, and I wasn't to be part of it. She was disregarding our friends.h.i.+p as well as all the years I'd known Denny. I didn't like it. She had to be near collapse from lack of sleep and stress. If she ended up sick or irrational, both of them would need someone to pick up the pieces.
Craig hadn't called and I didn't like that any better. I wanted to hear that we were okay. I wouldn't mind talking to Ken, while I was wis.h.i.+ng.
Calvin returned and found me scrubbing the aviary feeding platforms. "Neal's got the job posted. You better get your application in." He shooed me out early for lunch.
Jackie, the department secretary, printed off the form for me. "Heading for the big time, huh? Don't forget us little people."
I snorted and was searching for a witty reply when she added, "Neal wants to see you."
"Here I am."
"He's Skypeing with the elephant insemination guy. He and Ian and Cheyenne. I think they're scheduling the next try at knocking up Nakri."
"I'll come back after lunch."
"No, he'll be at a meeting downtown. This thing will be over in ten minutes."
I sat and ate my sandwich until Ian and Cheyenne emerged. Ian pretended I wasn't there. Cheyenne gave me a cautious smile.
Neal saw me through the door. "Oakley. Let's talk."
I stepped into his office.
"Close the door."
I closed the door.
"Not to be trite, but there's good news and there's bad news."
The bad news had been really awful lately. I sat down. "Let's have it."
He ma.s.saged the bridge of his nose. "Did you plan to apply for the senior keeper position that just opened up?"
"Yup."
"I wanted to talk to you privately. Maybe this information is outdated." He pulled out a folder and rubbed his nose on the back of a hand.
"What information?"
"Your personnel file indicates you finished two years of college. Is that correct?"
"Yes. Is there a problem?"
"Senior keeper requires a degree. All our job descriptions were updated a year and a half ago. The requirement aligns the position with current standards in the industry."
"A college degree."
"A bachelor's degree in a related field."
I sat paralyzed with surprise and dismay. This could not be true. My next reaction was that my mother must never hear of this, followed by the realization that I was a dumb-a.s.s moron loser. My eyes p.r.i.c.kled.
Neal closed the folder. "If you pick up an A.A. degree and you're enrolled in a B.A. program, I might manage a temporary waiver. But you've got to get that bachelors to fill a senior keeper position."
"What about the fact that I have years of experience in that exact job, and I'm d.a.m.ned good at what I do? That doesn't count for squat?" Anger pushed the tears back.
He folded his hands on his desk. "I was pretty sure you hadn't read the requirements. I wanted to give you a chance to think it over."
Think? This was not a moment when thinking was an option. I stood up. "I can't deal with this now."
"Wait. You haven't had the good news yet."
I sat and tried to listen.
"A post office in Kelso found one of the tortoises. A clerk heard it moving around in a package. Postal Inspection Services notified all the post offices in southern Was.h.i.+ngton, and they found the other one, too. So they'll be back just as soon as the deputy who opened the boxes gets himself here."
"Good. Great." I was still sinking into a pool of dismay. I sat up straighter. Focus. Breathe. "That means that the Tiptons will stay broke, a.s.suming they don't get paid until delivery. And now the police have the name and address of one or two of their customers."
"We'll have to see how that plays out. Apparently the clerk already bragged to the media, so it won't be any secret."
"Too bad."
"Might not make any difference."
I stood up again.
Neal turned toward his computer. "You think about my suggestion. I'll try to work with you on this." He scowled at me. "Also, I'd like to be informed immediately about anything that affects your safety, work-related or not."
"Sure," I mumbled and got out of there. What could he do about my safety? Let me move into the Penguinarium with Robby and two dogs?
I headed toward Birds, then remembered I was at Primates for the afternoon. That brought me by the lions, who were inside, and then to the young tigers. It was a cold, bl.u.s.tery day with fitful rain. They didn't care. They were Amur tigers, formerly known as Siberian tigers, adapted to climates far colder than this. They scoffed at our paltry winters. One of the sisters was in the pool slamming a floating Boomer ball around. The other paced the rim and yowled, sticking out a paw to bat at the big red ball whenever it was within reach.
The one in the pool-Katrina-lunged out, water sheeting off her sides, and chased Nadia down into the moat. Nadia raced back up and whirled around to grapple with her sibling, long tails flying. Young, healthy, beautiful. Full of life.
I'd never bothered to plan my career and now it turned out my job was a dead end. I liked my job, but "dead end" was depressing. And financially scary. Perspective trickled in. I'd trade a better job for a guarantee of Denny's survival in a heartbeat. I absorbed what I could of the tigers' vigor and trudged to Primates.
The mandrill troop looked good and gave my mood another tiny boost. The baby crept around on Violet's lap, little jerky movements. I waved to get his attention and he looked at me, big-eyed and alert. He was beyond adorable. I stalled for a few minutes. Sky ambled over and, to my surprise, Violet didn't flee. He made a casual pa.s.s at grooming her shoulder, nothing like Carmine's beauty-school-graduate expertise, and sniffed at his son. The baby froze as the big muzzle came close, but didn't freak out. Violet seemed unconcerned and perhaps a trifle smug. This baby business was working out for her. She had gone from Cinderella sleeping on the hearth to princess of the troop, a status she hadn't enjoyed since she was in estrus.
I found Kip at the cotton-top tamarins. "Kip, listen to this. Sky just groomed Violet so he could get close to the baby. You were right-he was never aggressing at Violet, he just wanted to see the baby." Sky would never be the monkey equivalent of my dad-that wasn't in the mandrill repertoire-but maybe he wouldn't terrorize his son in Jerome Tipton style.
Kip shrugged a no-big-deal shrug, but a hint of relief gave her away. "He hates it when the baby cries. He threatens everyone in sight and chases Violet. But now Violet lets the baby nurse so there's no crying, and everyone has settled down. I told you it would be fine."
Sure she did. "The baby looks great."
"Mr. Crandall asked a donor to name him. It's 'Mtoki.'"
"Which means?"
"It's a banana dish from the Cameroon. Supposed to be great stuff."
"I like the sound of it. Mandrills are from the Cameroon, right?"
Kip looked ever so slightly impressed. "Yes, they are. Mtoki is way better than 'Butchy'."
This was an ancient grudge from a Diana monkey that Mr. Crandall had named after a city councilman's nephew.
Calvin might have total confidence in my skills, but Kip didn't. I scrubbed cages and fixed diets under her careful eye until quitting time. Nonetheless, I found opportunities to list the reasons college was impossible.
I had a full-time job that left me physically tired.
I had a pre-schooler. Time I spent on school would come out of time with Robby.
I had to find roommates just to meet my bills. The only way to pay for tuition was loans and how was I going to pay those back?
And the big one-I wasn't that good at studying. I'd pa.s.sed all my cla.s.ses my freshman and soph.o.m.ore year, but I gave Marcie's tutoring most of the credit.
It was impossible.
But other people with kids and jobs did it. How did they pull it off? No matter, it wouldn't work for me.
I'd been happy with my job until I found out I was stuck. I'd go back to being happy with it again.
I was inspecting Comice pears at New Seasons grocery store in southeast Portland when my phone rang. Craig. Three days after I'd tossed caution to the wind. It felt like weeks. I stepped into the wine aisle where it was quieter.
"Hey," he said. "Haven't heard from you." His voice was neutral, cautious.
"I was thinking the same." I intended to match the neutral tone, but maybe that was too cold? Nope. I'd had a bad day, and he should have checked in with me before this.
"I wasn't sure you wanted to hear from me. You took off pretty fast."
I'd hurt his feelings by not staying for breakfast? My heart sank a little. "I told you-it was great, but I had to get back to my kid."
"How's your friend? The news said he was hurt pretty bad." Still neutral.
So this was a business call. Research. Now my feelings were hurt. "It looks like he'll live. He looks a little better every day."
"He's getting good care?"
"Bullet wounds are business as usual for the trauma center. They seem to know what they're doing."
"Good. You must be pretty upset anyway. Hey, could I see you again? Maybe tomorrow night?" His voice had warmed and s.h.i.+fted to personal.
That was better. "I'd like that. But I'm losing my mind right now with Denny and work and everything else. My life is in chaos. Can I call you tomorrow and let you know?"
"Yes, you can."
I didn't want to hang up. Three friends.h.i.+ps were on the wane. I could use a new one. "Wait. Did you hear the two stolen tortoises were found?"
"That fast."
"Yeah, and they're still alive. A tiny piece of good news."
We both breathed for a minute. "Have you found out anything new?" Lame...I walked back to the fruit section. I needed to get home.
"Just what the news has. I'm really frustrated. Nothing's working out." He added, "Except for Sat.u.r.day night."
"That did work out pretty well." I smiled at the apples, relieved. He wasn't staying mad. Maybe we had a future. I tucked the phone under my ear to free my hands and bagged up organic Fujis. Expensive, but my mother wanted organic.
"Atlantic turned me down, but I've pitched Harper's and they're nibbling. Some of the online sites pay fairly well, so I'm negotiating there."
"Um, I have a new theory." I told him about the third man while I selected carrots. I dropped one and had to put the phone down for a few seconds. "Say that again?"
"I said I like it. Your theory. I'm wondering how I can confirm it. Where are you?"
"Grocery shopping." I told him my plan to lure the whole pack of them out of hiding by telling them I knew where the gold was. "I tried to get Gettler, the deputy sheriff, to buy into it. He thinks I'm a lunatic." A woman with an infant in a front pack stepped away from me.
"He's ent.i.tled to his opinion." A pause. "For that to work, you'd need to be pretty convincing. Not that I think this is a good idea."