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"Well, I don't know whether I am or not," said Booverman, obstinately.
In fact, he felt rather defrauded. The integrity of his record was attacked. "See here, I play thirty-six holes a day, two hundred and sixteen a week, a thousand a month, six thousand a year; ten years, sixty thousand holes; and this is the first time a bit of luck has ever happened to me--once in sixty thousand times."
Pickings drew out a handkerchief and wiped his forehead.
"It may come all at once," he said faintly.
This mild hope only infuriated Booverman. He had already teed his ball for the second hole, which was poised on a rolling hill one hundred and thirty-five yards away. It is considered rather easy as golf-holes go.
The only dangers are a matted wilderness of long gra.s.s in front of the tee, the certainty of landing out of bounds on the slightest slice, or of rolling down hill into a soggy substance on a pull. Also there is a tree to be hit and a sand-pit to be sampled.
"Now watch my little friend the apple-tree," said Booverman. "I'm going to play for it, because, if I slice, I lose my ball, and that knocks my whole game higher than a kite." He added between his teeth: "All I ask is to get around to the eighth hole before I lose my ball. I know I'll lose it there."
Due to the fact that his two on the first brought him not the slightest thrill of nervous joy, he made a perfect shot, the ball carrying the green straight and true.
"This is your day all right," said Pickings, stepping to the tee.
"Oh, there's never been anything the matter with my irons," said Booverman, darkly. "Just wait till we strike the fourth and fifth holes."
When they climbed the hill, Booverman's ball lay within three feet of the cup, which he easily putted out.
"Two down," said Pickings, inaudibly. "By George! what a glorious start!"
"Once in sixty thousand times," said Booverman to himself. The third hole lay two hundred and five yards below, backed by the road and trapped by ditches, where at that moment Pollock, true to his traditions as a war correspondent, was laboring in the trenches, to the unrestrained delight of Wessels, who had pa.s.sed beyond.
"Theobald," said Booverman, selecting his cleek and speaking with inspired conviction, "I will tell you exactly what is going to happen. I will smite this little homeopathic pill, and it will land just where I want it. I will probably put out for another two. Three holes in twos would probably excite any other human being on the face of this globe.
It doesn't excite me. I know too well what will follow on the fourth or fifth. Watch."
"Straight to the pin," said Pickings in a loud whisper. "You've got a dead line on every shot to-day. Marvelous! When you get one of your streaks, there's certainly no use in my playing."
"Streak's the word," said Booverman, with a short, barking laugh. "Thank heaven, though, Pickings, I know it! Five years ago I'd have been shaking like a leaf. Now it only disgusts me. I've been fooled too often; I don't bite again."
In this same profoundly melancholic mood he approached his ball, which lay on the green, hole high, and put down a difficult put, a good three yards for his third two.
Pickings, despite all his cla.s.sic conservatism, was so overcome with excitement that he twice putted over the hole for a shameful five.
Booverman's face as he walked to the fourth tee was as joyless as a London fog. He placed his ball carelessly, selected his driver, and turned on the fidgety Pickings with the gloomy solemnity of a father about to indulge in corporal punishment.
"Once in sixty thousand times, Picky. Do you realize what a start like this--three twos--would mean to a professional like Frank or even an amateur that hadn't offended every busy little fate and fury in the whole hoodooing business? Why, the blooming record would be knocked into the middle of next week."
"You'll do it," said Pickings in a loud whisper. "Play carefully."
Booverman glanced down the four-hundred-yard straightaway and murmured to himself:
"I wonder, little ball, whither will you fly?
I wonder, little ball, have I bid you good-by?
Will it be 'mid the prairies in the regions to the west?
Will it be in the marshes where the pollywogs nest?
Oh, tell me, little ball, is it ta-ta or good-by?"
[Ill.u.s.tration: "Oh, tell me, little ball, is it ta-ta or good-by?"]
He p.r.o.nounced the last word with a settled conviction, and drove another long, straight drive. Pickings, thrilled at the possibility of another miracle, sliced badly.
"This is one of the most truly delightful holes of a picturesque course," said Booverman, taking out an approaching cleek for his second shot. "Nothing is more artistic than the tiny little patch of putting-green under the s.h.a.ggy branches of the willows. The receptive graveyard to the right gives a certain pathos to it, a splendid, quiet note in contrast to the feeling of the swift, hungry river to the left, which will now receive and carry from my outstretched hand this little white floater that will float away from me. No matter; I say again the fourth green is a thing of ravis.h.i.+ng beauty."
This second shot, low and long, rolled up in the same unvarying line.
"On the green," said Pickings.
"Short," said Booverman, who found, to his satisfaction, that he was right by a yard.
"Take your time," said Pickings, biting his nails.
"Rats! I'll play it for a five," said Booverman.
His approach ran up on the line, caught the rim of the cup, hesitated, and pa.s.sed on a couple of feet.
"A four, anyway," said Pickings, with relief.
"I should have had a three," said Booverman, doggedly. "Any one else would have had a three, straight on the cup. You'd have had a three, Picky; you know you would."
Pickings did not answer. He was slowly going to pieces, forgetting the invincible stoicism that is the pride of the true golfer.
"I say, take your time, old chap," he said, his voice no longer under control. "Go slow! go slow!"
"Picky, for the first four years I played this course," said Booverman, angrily, "I never got better than a six on this simple three-hundred-and-fifty-yard hole. I lost my ball five times out of seven. There is something irresistibly alluring to me in the mosquito patches to my right. I think it is the fond hope that when I lose this nice new ball I may step inadvertently on one of its hundred brothers, which I may then bring home and give decent burial."
Pickings, who felt a mad and ungolfish desire to entreat him to caution, walked away to fight down his emotion.
"Well?" he said, after the click of the club had sounded.
"Well," said Booverman, without joy, "that ball is lying about two hundred and forty yards straight up the course, and by this time it has come quietly to a little cozy home in a nice, deep hoof track, just as I found it yesterday afternoon. Then I will have the exquisite pleasure of taking my niblick, and whanging it out for the loss of a stroke. That'll infuriate me, and I'll slice or pull. The best thing to do, I suppose, would be to play for a conservative six."
When, after four butchered shots, Pickings had advanced to where Booverman had driven, the ball lay in clear position just beyond the b.u.mps and rills that ordinarily welcome a long shot. Booverman played a perfect mashy, which dropped clear on the green, and ran down a moderate put for a three.
They then crossed the road and arrived by a planked walk at a dirt mound in the midst of a swamp. Before them the cozy marsh lay stagnant ahead and then sloped to the right in the figure of a boomerang, making for those who fancied a slice a delightful little carry of one hundred and fifty yards. To the left was a procession of trees, while beyond, on the course, for those who drove a long ball, a giant willow had fallen the year before in order to add a new perplexity and foster the enthusiasm for luxury that was beginning among the caddies.
"I have a feeling," said Booverman, as though puzzled but not duped by what had happened--"I have a strange feeling that I'm not going to get into trouble here. That would be too obvious. It's at the seventh or eighth holes that something is lurking around for me. Well, I won't waste time."
He slapped down his ball, took a full swing, and carried the far-off bank with a low, shooting drive that continued bounding on.
"That ought to roll forever," said Pickings, red with excitement.
"The course is fast--dry as a rock," said Booverman, deprecatingly.
Pickings put three b.a.l.l.s precisely into the bubbling water, and drew alongside on his eighth shot. Booverman's drive had skimmed over the dried plain for a fair two hundred and seventy-five yards. His second shot, a full bra.s.sy, rolled directly on the green.
"If he makes a four here," said Pickings to himself, "he'll be playing five under four--no, by thunder! seven under four!" Suddenly he stopped, overwhelmed. "Why, he's actually around threes--two under three now.
Heavens! if he ever suspects it, he'll go into a thousand pieces."