The History of The Hen Fever Part 27

"Please forward them, as per schedule, in care of Adams & Co.'s Express; whose agents, I am a.s.sured, will feed and water them regularly _three times a day_[15] on the route, and who are universally proverbial for their attention to the birds thus directed and intrusted to their care. I shall order the 'Suffolks'

shortly.

"Yours, truly,

I sent this anxious purchaser sixty chickens, at ten dollars each (cheap enough, to be sure), in accordance with his directions, and he was delighted with them. I do not _now_ entertain a shadow of doubt that every _one_ of those ten "different varieties" were bred from white hens and a black c.o.c.k, of the ordinary "Shanghae" tribe.

[14] This was the kind of customer I met with occasionally, and whom I always took at his word. The gentleman who "didn't care about price" was always the man after my own heart.

[15] Certainly--of course. The express agents had nothing else to do but to "feed and water" fowls "_three times a day_" on the way!

CHAPTER XLI.

THE FATE OF THE "MODEL" SHANGHAES.

Napoleon, the great, found himself compelled to succ.u.mb to adverse fate, at the end of a long and brilliantly triumphant career. "It was destiny," he said; and he bowed to the fiat; which at last he was unable successfully to dodge.

I was the fortunate owner of a pair of fine Shanghae fowls, that were universally acknowledged to be "at the head of the crowd,"--so far as there was any beauty or attractive qualities, whatever, in this species of animal,--and I thought they were not bad-looking birds, really.

I caused a likeness to be taken of them from life, accurately, and it was placed, some years since, at the head of the circulars which I always enclosed back to my correspondents, in reply to their favors and inquiries regarding my views as to what was the _best_ kind of domestic bird for breeding.

The c.o.c.k was very handsomely formed, and when in full feather was exceedingly showy, and graceful, and n.o.ble in his carriage. His hen companions were fine, too; but there was one in particular, that, in company with this bird, I showed at several fairs, where they invariably carried away the first premium, without any question or cavil as to comparative beauty and merit. I named them "Napoleon" and the "Empress."

Their joint weight, when in the best condition, was about twenty-two pounds; and as the "fancy" then raged, they were really unexceptionable.

I "donno" how many chickens I have sold by means of the _pictures_ of these birds, but I _do_ know that, unfortunately, this particular hen never laid an egg while I owned her, which was some two years. Still, she was very handsome, as was also her husband; and I certainly raised a great many fine chickens while they were in my yards. I called them my very best,--and they were, indeed, to look at,--_a model pair of Shanghaes_, as will be seen by a glance at their portraits on the next page.

[Ill.u.s.tration: THE "MODEL" SHANGHAES.----(See page 280.)]

But they were singled out for a curious fate. At two or three of our early fairs they had taken the first prizes; and at one of the exhibitions, finally, there chanced to come along a gentleman who fancied them exceedingly, and who was bound to possess himself of the best that could be had. He had a long purse (though, at the time _he_ bought, prices were not up to the mark they reached subsequently, by a long margin); and when he offered forty dollars for this "model" pair, it was thought, by most of the outsiders, to be a fabulous transaction altogether, made up between us to aid in gulling "the people." However, he paid his money for them, sent them off, and the following account of their subsequent fate is thus touchingly furnished by my friend "Acorn,"

who chanced to be "in at the death":

"The gentleman who became the fortunate purchaser of these fine fowls had come to the city in the morning for the purpose of posting himself up generally, and to procure a pair of these then very desirable birds, though he did not imagine that he would be called upon to come down so 'werry han'some' for a single pair. He saw these, however, and visions of brilliant promise loomed up before him, if he could contrive to obtain them, however high a figure this 'magnificent' twain might be held at. As soon as he secured them, he felt that his fortune was made.

"He calculated to remain in town until evening, and, sitting down, he hastily wrote a note to the keeper of a fas.h.i.+onable hotel in T---- street, informing him that he would dine with him, and that the bearer would deliver him a pair of nice chickens, which he desired him to take charge of. He also directed the boy (to whom he gave this note and the coop) to say that he would take dinner with his friend at four P.M.; and, sending up the fowls, he turned to other matters, for the day.

"Arriving at the hotel, the youngster found the landlord, and said,

"'Here's a pair of rousing big chickens Mr. M----s has sent up; and he says he'll be here to dine with you at four o'clock,'

"The landlord supposed that his friend knew a hawk from a handsaw, as well as a canva.s.s-back from a broiled owl; and believed that he had 'sent up' something a little extra for the proposed dinner. He therefore ordered the two birds to be placed in the hands of the cook, and gave directions also to have these 'model Shanghaes'

killed and dressed at once, for the proposed dinner, to come off at four o'clock P.M.!

"This order was promptly obeyed; and at the hour appointed the chicken-fancier made his appearance, in company with a few of the 'boys,' and the dinner was served up with due accompaniments. After indulging in sundry wine bitters, as a sharpener to their appet.i.tes, the snug party sat down to table, and the liberal owner of the forty-dollar Shanghaes was politely invited to carve. While in the act of dissecting those enormous 'members of the late hen convention,' the amateur remarked,

"''Pon my word, Major, you've a n.o.ble pair of chickens here, to be sure.'

"'Yes, yes,' responded the Major. 'I think they _are_ an indifferently good-sized pair of birds. They were sent up to me, to-day, by a mutual friend of ours. I think we shall find them choice.'

"'A present, eh?' said the owner, unwittingly. 'A very clever fellow our friend must be, Major. Capital,--really!' And as he finally commenced to enjoy the feast, he added, 'I declare they are very fine, and of the most delicious flavor I ever tasted. Juicy, too,--juicy as a canva.s.s-back.'

"Thus continued the victim, praising the rich excellence of the birds, until at last he had bagged a bottle or more of sparkling Schreider. While chatting over their Sherry, at last, and enjoying the rich aroma of their regalias, the now unlucky owner of the model Shanghaes suddenly said,

"'By the way, Major, speaking of fowls, what do you think of my hen-purchase, this morning? Aren't they good 'uns?'

"'Well, Bill,' rejoined his friend, 'I think they were delicious.

And I won't mind if you dine with me every day in the week, provided you can send me up such chickens as those!'

"'_Such_ chickens!' exclaimed Bill, astounded, as the thought for the first time flashed upon him that he might possibly now have been dining upon his 'model Shanghaes.' 'Why, Major, what the deuce do you mean?'

"'Mean?' replied the Major; 'nothing,--only to say--without any intention of disturbing your nerves,--that we have just finished a most capital dinner upon those nice Shanghaes that you sent up to me, this morning.'

"'_What!_' yelled Bill, jumping wildly up from the table; 'what do you say, Major?'

"'Those Shanghaes--'

"Bill groaned, rammed his hands clean up to the elbows into his breeches-pockets, and, after striding fiercely across the room some half a dozen times, without uttering another word, but with his eyes all this time 'in a fine frenzy rolling,' he stopped short, and, turning to the Major, he exclaimed, with no little gesticulation,

"'Good G.o.d, Major, you don't mean to say you're serious, now?'

"'Nothing else, Bill. What's the matter?'

"'Why, _I paid forty dollars for that pair of chickens, this morning, at the hen-show_!'

"'You did!'

"'Yes. Didn't that stupid boy give you my note, when he left the chickens?'

"'Not a note; not even a due-bill,' said the Major, provokingly.

"'I mean my letter,' continued Bill.

"'No,' said the Major, 'he gave me no letter; he simply delivered the fowls, and informed me that you would dine with me at four P.M.

I thought, of course, you would like them thus, and so I had 'em roasted.'

"Bill didn't stop for further explanations, but rushed for his horse and wagon, and wasn't seen in the city but once afterwards, for a long time. He was then closely m.u.f.fled up, and had both his ears stopped up with cotton-batting, lest he might possibly hear some one say _Shanghae_!

"A few weeks afterwards, while pa.s.sing near his residence, I halted, and dropped in upon him for an hour; and, after a while, I ventured to touch upon the merits and beauties of the different breeds of poultry;--but I discovered, at once, that there was a wildness about Bill's eyes, and therefore ceased to allude to this usually interesting 'rural' subject, as Bill exclaimed, imploringly,

"'Don't hit me, old boy, now I'm down! _That chicken dinner has never yet digested!_'"

Thus "pa.s.sed away" one of the handsomest pairs of domestic fowls ever seen in this part of the country, and which were well known, by all the fanciers around me, as tip-top specimens of the then lauded race of Shanghaes.

This result proved rather an expensive dinner for Mr. M----s; but, while it served for an excellent lesson to him (as well as to many of his friends who chanced to hear of what the Major called "this capital joke"), he had the satisfaction, subsequently, of ascertaining that he got off at a remarkably low figure. _His_ hen fever was very quickly, and fortunately, cured. But for this sudden and happy turn in his case, the disease _might_ have cost him far more dearly.