Put Yourself in His Place - BestLightNovel.com
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Well, all the better. It was decided. He would not look at her face any more. He could not bear it.
He rushed away from the bower and made for the seaside; but he soon returned another way, gained his own room, and there burnt the fragments of the letter to ashes.
But, though he was impenitent, remorse was not subdued. He could not look Grace Carden in the face now. So he sent word he must go back to Hillsborough directly.
He packed his bag and went down-stairs with it.
On the last landing he met Grace Carden. She started a little.
"What! going away?"
"Yes, Miss Carden."
"No bad news, I hope?" said she, kindly.
The kindly tone coming from her, to whom he had shown no mercy, went through that obdurate heart.
"No--no," he faltered; "but the sight of your unhappiness--Let me go. I am a miserable man!"
And with this he actually burst out crying and ran past her.
Grace told her father, and asked him to find out what was the matter with Mr. Coventry.
Mr. Carden followed Coventry to the station, and Coventry, who had now recovered his self-possession and his cunning, told him that for some time Miss Carden had worn a cheerful air, which had given him hopes; but this morning, watching her from a bower in the garden, he had seen such misery in her face that it had quite upset him; and he was going away to try and recover that composure, without which he felt he would be no use to her in any way.
This tale Carden brought back to his daughter, and she was touched by it. "Poor Mr. Coventry!" said she. "Why does he waste so much love on me?"
Her father, finding her thus softened, pleaded hard for his friend, and reminded Grace that she had not used him well. She admitted that at once, and went so far as to say that she felt bound never to marry any one but Mr. Coventry, unless time should cure him, as she hoped it would, of his unfortunate attachment.
From this concession Mr. Carden urged her daily to another, viz., that Mr. Coventry might be permitted to try and win her affection.
Her answer was, "He had much better content himself with what I can and do give him--my esteem and grat.i.tude and sincere pity."
Mr. Carden, however, persisted, and the deep affection he had shown his daughter gave him great power. It was two against one; and the two prevailed.
Mr. Coventry began to spend his whole time at Eastbank Cottage.
He followed Grace about with a devotion to which no female heart could be entirely insensible; and, at last, she got used to him, and rather liked to have him about her. He broke her solitude as a dog does, and he fetched and carried for her, and talked when she was inclined to listen, and was silent when he saw his voice jarred upon her bereaved heart.
Without her father, matters might have gone on so for years; but Mr.
Carden had now so many motives for marrying his daughter to Coventry, that he used all his judgment and all his influence. He worked on his daughter's pride, her affection, her sense of honor, and her sense of duty.
She struggled, she sighed, she wept; but, by little and little, she submitted. And, since three months more pa.s.sed with no striking event, I will deviate from my usual custom and speak a little of what pa.s.sed in her mind.
First of all, then, she was so completely deceived by appearances, that she believed the exact opposite of the truth in each particular. To her not only did black seem white, but white black. Her dead lover had given her but half his heart. Her living lover was the soul of honor and true devotion. It was her duty, though not her pleasure, to try and love him; to marry him would be a good and self-denying action.
And what could she lose by it? Her own chance of happiness was gone.
All she could hope for hereafter was the gentle satisfaction that arises from making others happy. She had but a choice of evils: never to marry at all, or to marry Frederick Coventry.
Thus far she was conscious of her own feelings, and could, perhaps, have put them into words; but here she drifted out of her depth.
Nature implants in women a genuine love of offspring that governs them unconsciously. It governs the unconscious child; it governs the half-conscious mother who comes home from the toyshop with a waxen child for her girl, and a drum for her boy.
Men desire offspring---when they desire it at all--from vanity alone.
Women desire it from pure love of it.
This instinct had probably its share in withholding Grace from making up her mind never to marry; and so operated negatively, though not positively, in Coventry's favor.
And so, by degrees and in course of time, after saying "no" a dozen times, she said "yes" once in a moment of utter la.s.situde, and afterward she cried and wished to withdraw her consent, but they were two to one, and had right on their side, she thought.
They got her to say she would marry him some day or other.
Coventry intercepted several letters, but he took care not to read them with Grace's sad face in sight. He would not give conscience such a power to torment him. The earlier letters gave him a cruel satisfaction.
They were written each from a different city in the United States, and all tended to show that the writer had a year or two to travel yet, before he could hope to return home in triumph and marry his Grace.
In all these letters she was requested to send her answers to New York (and, now I think of it, there was a postscript to that effect in the very letter I have given in extenso).
But at last came a letter that disturbed this delightful dream. It was written from the western extremity of the States, but the writer was in high spirits; he had sold his patents in two great cities, and had established them in two more on a royalty; he had also met with an unexpected piece of good fortune: his railway clip had been appreciated, a man of large capital and enterprise had taken it up with spirit, and was about to purchase the American and Canadian right for a large sum down and a percentage. As soon as this contract should be signed he should come home and claim Mr. Carden's promise. He complained a little that he got no letters, but concluded the post-office authorities were in fault, for he had written to New York to have them forwarded.
However, he soon should be in that city and revel in them.
This troubled Coventry, and drove him to extremities. He went on his knees to Grace, and implored her to name the day.
She drew back with horror and repugnance; said, with a burst of tears, she was a widow, and would not marry till a decent time had elapsed since--; then, with sudden doggedness, "I will never marry at all."
And so she left him to repent his precipitation.
He was at his wits' end, and could do nothing but look unhappy, and temporize, and hope the wind might change.
The wind did not change, and he pa.s.sed a week or two of outward sorrow, but inward rage.
He fell ill, and Mr. Carden pitied him openly.
Grace maintained a sullen silence.
One day, as he was in bed, an envelope was brought him, with a large "L." He opened it slowly, fearing the worst.
The letter was full of love, and joy, and triumph that made the reader's heart faint within him till he came to this sentence:
"The gentleman who treats with me for the railway clip makes it an express stipulation that I shall spend a month in his works at Chicago, superintending the forging and perfecting of the clip. As he intends to be there himself, and to buy it out-and-out if it answers his expectations, I shall certainly go, and wear a smith's ap.r.o.n once more for your sake. He is even half inclined to go into another of my projects--the forging of large axes by machinery. It was tried at Hillsborough two years ago, but the Union sent a bullet through the manufacturer's hat, and he dropped it."
The letter from which I give this extract was a reprieve. He had five or six weeks before him still.
Soon after this, his faithful ally, Mr. Carden, worked on Grace's pity; and as Coventry never complained, nor irritated her in any way, she softened to him. Then all the battery of imploring looks was brought to bear on her by Coventry, and of kind admonition and entreaty by her father; and so, between them, they gently thrust her down the slope.
"Stop all their tongues," said Mr. Carden. "Come back to Hillsborough a wife. I gave up my choice to yours once. Now give me my way. I am touched to the heart by this young man's devotion: he invites me to live with him when you are married. What other young fellow would show me so much mercy?"