The Comical Adventures of Twm Shon Catty Part 18

"Tough steaks he gave us for breakfast," cried the baronet, "tough as an alligator with his scales on."

"Fine fun if he had choked you all! but never mind!" returned the squire, "a joke is a joke, and a bet is a bet; and I have come to pay mine."

Scarcely had he uttered these magnanimous sentiments, that proved him worthy of the Grand Master's chair in a society of laughing philosophers, than the booted bull, Bishop, gravely approached, with our hero on his back. A fresh explosion now burst from the party, to note the stately and apparently conceited paces of the buskind king of the kine, who now wore his boots with toes foremost, like any other gentleman; but none laughed so heartily as Prothero himself, who seemed in raptures to find his bull unbutchered.

"This fellow would tame a fiery dragon," quoth he, "aye, and ride him through the air, too, without fear, or he could never have coaxed Bishop into such a good humour as to become a steed for him."

The whole party now entered the house, and Prothero narrated, to their boundless amus.e.m.e.nt, their ultimate discovery of the bull's abduction.

Rosser and his fellows had been sent in a body to trace the foot-prints of the bull in the snow, and recapture him if possible; but as such signs were utterly invisible, Rosser returned in the utmost dismay, with a face half a yard long, from the effect, he said, of a new light that had just broken in upon him. With great solemnity, he declared his conviction that the supposed bull was no beast at all, but the devil in disguise, as not a print of his hoof was to be found anywhere, although four set of human feet were traceable, backwards and forwards.

"That was no bull," said the wise Rosser; "it was a devil which, after kicking down the cow-house, and firing the hay with his brimstone breath, flew away in a clap of thunder, which indeed I heard myself, as plainly as I hear my own voice at this moment."

"For all these abominable bounces," quoth the squire, "I called him a liar and a fool, when the fellow turned upon me with 'the devil take the bull! you didn't think I could keep him in my pocket!' Now the whimsicality of the idea of a fellow's pocketing a bull, tickled me so much that I forgave him everything!" Another chorus of the trebles and ba.s.s aforesaid burst out again, and, at the conclusion, the ladies declared they had almost laughed themselves into illness.

"Never mind, fair ones, let the stay-laces crack-cut them asunder, and give the lungs and laughter fair play!" cried the squire; closing his period with as hearty a "ho, ho, ho!" as usually formed the climax of his sayings and doings. In the present instance the elderly gentleman chimed in with him, and exclaiming, "droll as ever, Prothero, but now outwitted by a mere boy."

"True, Sir John, (your pardon for the omission of my respects thus long)," cried the squire, as he cordially shook his hand, "but such a boy as our combined manhood here never met with before."

The worthy here referred to, and before noticed as the gentleman with the saturnine nose, was no less a personage than Sir John Price, Baronet, of Priory House, Brecon, the highly respected father of Lady Devereaux. He had arrived the preceding evening, about the time that Twm commenced his attack upon the bull.

Lady Devereaux explained to her father the great and gallant services which she had received at Twm's hands, and her statement was made in the most earnest and impa.s.sioned manner, as if her grat.i.tude was as great as on the day she was attacked by Dio the Devil, and rescued by our hero.

Sir John Price at once rose from his chair, in a way that strongly contrasted with his usual cold and ceremonious habit, and extending his white, diamond-ringed, aristocratic hand to Twm, a.s.sured him of his friends.h.i.+p and protection in all things wherein he could serve him.

Twm would not accept the money which Prothero tendered in liquidation of his bet. "No," said the successful champion, "it was all for fun and amus.e.m.e.nt, and you will allow that we have had some enjoyment out of it, and all I ask is that, when I am far away, and you are brought face to face with your well-prized bull, Bishop, you will think of me."

The generosity of his sentiments met with the encomiums of all present; and the worthy squire reluctantly consenting to receive back his bull without fee or fine, absolutely insisted on leaving the forfeited twenty pounds in the hands of Lady Devereaux, who received it accordingly.

Recollecting the manner in which he had been hunted from Tregaron, it was truly gratifying to his feelings, and flattering to his pride, to hear persons of the rank of the present company express their regret that he was to leave them the next morning.

The following day was the one appointed for Twm's departure to London, and he arose with a sorrowful heart, (for he was thinking of the lady of his dream,) to make a preparation for his departure. The baronet having presented him with a sum of money for his expenses, insisted on his leaving behind him, with Lady Devereaux, whatever cash he possessed, till his return; while the lady herself, playfully promising to be a faithful banker, threw on his neck a heavy golden chain, as her present. Twm had often seen her wear it; and fervently kissing the splendid article, returned it to her keeping till his return.

If anything could add to his satisfaction, it was to experience the attention of his two fast friends, Rhys and the Squire, who even at this early hour had hastened to bid him farewell. Right glad was he of the opportunity of sending some cash to his mother, and to remit what he had borrowed from his friend, Cadwgan. In the yard, he had to receive the good wishes and parting civilities of every man and maidservant in the establishment, particularly of the huntsman and the whippers-in, with whom he had become an amazing favourite.

It had been concerted that his best mode of travelling _incog._ would be on a mean horse, with a pack-saddle, and disguised as a lowly country lad. Thus mounted and accoutred, behold him at length disappearing through the yard-gate of Ystrad Feen; the cash and papers entrusted to his care having been studiously concealed about his person. Although but ill-contented with his homely harness, he found his mountain pony, like his race in general, far better than his looks promised; so that he rode on with a heart full of glee, proud of the honours which he had gained, and glowing with bright antic.i.p.ations of the future.

Through his native princ.i.p.ality, his journey was interesting enough, so we need not note the scenes, which, however charming in their rural beauty and romantic wildness to Twm, would lose most of their attraction in mere description. He jogged on steadily and perseveringly till he had left Bristol behind, and he had even pa.s.sed through Bath and Chippenham before a single adventure occurred worthy of record.

Riding late one evening, between the last-named town and Marlborough, he found it necessary to put up at a small public-house on the road-side, distinguished by the sign of the "Hop-pole," the obscurity of which he considered favourable to his safety.

Having fed his beast and eaten his supper, he went immediately to bed; and, with a view of preserving his treasure in the best manner, slept without divesting himself of his clothes. He had slept some hours, and day was just breaking, when he was aroused by the trampling of a horse, and the gruff voice of a traveller whom he heard alight and enter the house.

A strong impulse of curiosity determined him to rise from his bed; and, as the large treble-bedded room which he occupied was over the parlour, to which the guest was introduced, he listened, to learn whether anything portended danger to himself. He found, to his surprise and dismay, that he was the subject of conversation between the landlady and her guest, whom he discovered to be no other than the very character of which he stood most particularly in peril-a highwayman.

He had heard himself described to him by the landlady, as an uncouth b.o.o.by of a countryman from the Welsh mountains, miserably mounted on a piece of animated carrion, for which the crows cawed as it limped along; and what booty was to be expected from such a beggar inquired she?

"You are wrong, mistress, you are quite wrong," cried the stranger; "from your account I expect much from him. I have robbed more than one such, dressed like a scarecrow, while making for London, and bearing with him the twelvemonth's rent of half-a-dozen of his neighbours to pay the landlord in town. I shall be at this fellow as soon as he quits your roof; I have no doubt but what he is a prize, and if he is, you of course come in for shares."

Having learnt thus much, Twm, in some trepidation, retired to his bed, and began to consider how he should contrive, in order to preserve the property in his possession. He rose again, thinking to escape through the window, but found it too small to admit his egress, and therefore gave up the idea.

As he looked out through the miserable cas.e.m.e.nt, busily plotting to hatch a scheme of deliverance, he could perceive no favourable object to aid his purpose except a large pool on the road-side, in which he thought of dropping his cash if he could reach it, and do the act un.o.bserved, so that he might recover it at his leisure.

As nothing better offered, he determined to adopt his plan immediately; and therefore, after making a studied clattering in putting on his shoes, he went down stairs, and called for a jug of beer and toast for his breakfast. The freebooter did not show himself, but the landlady and her daughter, who seemed to be in the habit of sitting up all night to receive and entertain such guests, scrutinized our hero very closely.

The worthy hostess asked him some apparently careless questions respecting his business in travelling the country, to which he replied he was trying to overtake a brother pigman, who was driving their joint charge to London.

While at breakfast, Twm's brain showed him another project for securing his valuables, which he considered an improvement upon the pond scheme.

To give a more clownish character to his manners, the night before, he had carried the old pack-saddle up stairs, brought it down in the morning, and while at breakfast sat on it before the fire, instead of a stool.

It occurred to him that this peculiarity of his would have been attributed to other motives, and that, no doubt, the honest inmates of the place thought that he would not have exhibited such care for his pack-saddle if it were not worth more than it looked. He was ultimately convinced that they had decided that all his treasure was contained therein.

Indeed, it was not a bad idea, for he could then sit on it all day and make a pillow of it by night. He determined to encourage their suspicions; accordingly, bursting a hole in the fore end of it, he called the landlady to receive her reckoning, and in her presence, pus.h.i.+ng his fist into the straw cus.h.i.+on of the pack-saddle, he drew out several pieces of gold, and asked her if she could give him change; but she answered in the negative, on which he again thrust his hand into the pack-saddle, and brought out more gold and silver intermixed; and with the latter settled his bill, and went to the stable for his horse.

Securing all his money about his person, he mounted his Rosinante.

Having cut away the girths from the pack-saddle, he bade the landlady farewell, and rode with all his might towards the pool, which was about a quarter of a mile forward on the road. He soon heard the highwayman brus.h.i.+ng forward in his rear, with many oaths calling on him to stop, a summons that increased our hero's speed, till, being opposite the pond, his pursuer overtook him.

Twm rode to the edge of the water, and threw the pack-saddle, with all his strength, towards the centre of the pool; but in bustling to regain a steady seat as he made towards the road, he fell headlong from his horse.

The free-booter cursed him for a Welsh fool, and with a thundering voice ordered him to hold his horse, or he would blow his brains out, (brandis.h.i.+ng his pistol all the while,) that he might go into the water to recover the booty.

Twm appeared to be frightened out of his senses, and trembled with very visible terror as he approached to do the robber's bidding; but no sooner had the highwayman reached the centre of the pool, and began groping about for the object of his search, than Twm, with one spring, mounted his fine tall horse, and rode away with all his might.

So far all went well; but, to Twm's unspeakable horror, the knight of the road, finding himself thus tricked, placed his fingers in his mouth and gave a loud whistle, on which his horse immediately stopped quite still.

Twm, in real terror, as he was within pistol-shot, roared "murder!" with all his might; when the horse, to his great amazement, took his exclamation of terror for a counter order, and again started into a gallop. The freebooter repeated his whistle, and again the horse stood still as a mile-stone: Twm reiterated "murder!" with all the power of his lungs; and the well-taught horse instantly resumed his gallop.

Thus the highwayman's whistle and Twm's roaring of "murder!" had an alternate effect on the n.o.ble animal, till at length, our hero got completely out of hearing of the baffled robber. As he rode on triumphantly, he sang the old Welsh pennill or stanza-{203}

"No cheat is it to cheat the cheater No treason to betray the traitor: Nor is it theft, but just deceiving, To thieve from him who lives by thieving."

As he rode into Marlborough, in the highest spirit, one of the church chimes was playing "See the conquering hero comes!" which appeared to him to be a singularly appropriate greeting, and which he accepted as a personal tribute to his ingenious trickery upon the highwayman, whom, Twm secretly hoped, had not yet got out the old pack-saddle from the pool.

How Twm laughed when he pictured to himself the rage and dismay of the villain when he discovered its contents! That was a thought to chuckle over and enjoy. It would extort many a boisterous "ho, ho, ho!" from old Squire Prothero, when he should have the pleasure of giving him the story.

He received great commendation at the inn where he stayed for the night, when he related his adventure; and many of the inhabitants were loud in their congratulations to the young Welshman, who had so cleverly outwitted the English highwayman.

CHAPTER XXVII.

WATT, the mole-catcher, in a pleasant mood. Twm hears of his old love, Gwenny Cadwgan. Tom Dorbell, and his feats. Another adventure with a knight of the road.

Twm had reason to be satisfied with his progress on his road to London, for he had met danger, and his wit and ingenuity had proved equal to any emergency. But success did not make him over-confident, and consequently careless; but, on finding himself yet seventy-four miles from his journey's end, he prepared for more trials of his skill and courage. He was sent for next morning by the mayor of Marlborough, who had heard of his adventure, and required to bring the horse with him, which he had so adroitly won.

Many gentlemen having a.s.sembled at the entrance to the town-hall, our hero appeared in all the pride of a conqueror, mounted on his goodly steed; although so humbly clad, their hats were doffed, and loud shouts of applause were immediately given. It was soon ascertained by the mayor and the gentlemen present, that the horse was regularly bred to the road, and instructed by a highwayman, therefore, not, as at first conjectured, the property of any person deprived of it by one of these free-faring gentry; consequently, his wors.h.i.+p, with many comments on his cleverness and courage told our hero that the horse was his own by right of conquest; but that if he were inclined to part with it, he would give forty pounds for it Twm directly a.s.sented; and the money was paid to him the same morning.

Being now in want of an animal on which to continue his travel, Twm determined to walk on to Hungerford, and purchase one nearly like the one he had set out upon at the commencement of his journey, as he was still of the same opinion, that the less temptation in his outward appearance to the gentlemen of the road, the less likely were they to interfere with him.

About three miles out of Hungerford, he saw before him a pig-drover, with a large herd of porkers, that he alternately cursed in his ancient British tongue, and cut up with a whip; while at intervals between these amusing recreations he loudly sang, or roared, certain sc.r.a.ps of Welsh songs. Twm's ear was quick in recognizing the well-known voice, and he soon stood side by side with his old friend Watt the mole-catcher. After mutual expressions of wonder and congratulation, Twm immediately asked him how his mother was, as well as farmer Cadwgan and his daughter Gwenny.