The Comical Adventures of Twm Shon Catty Part 5

After depositing their offerings, and partaking of a little refreshment, twelve of the bridegroom's friends, headed by Ianto Gwyn the harper, mounted their ponies and called at Catty's house, to demand the bride; and Watt the mole-catcher and _Gwahoddwr_, who added to these functions the father to Catty, expecting their arrival, at length heard without appearing, the following lines, delivered by the merry harper, from the back of his pony.

Open windows, open doors, And with flowers strew the floors, Heap the hearth with blazing wood, Load the spit with festal food The _crochen_ {58} on its hook be placed, And tap a barrel of the best!

For this is Catty's wedding day!

Now bring the fair one out, I pray.

On which Watt, with the door still closed, made this reply without appearing.

Who are ye all! ye noisy train!

Be ye thieves, or honest men, Tell us now what brings you here, Or this intrusion costs you dear!

Ianto Gwyn then rejoins,

Honest men are we, who seek A dainty maid both fair and meek, Very good and very pretty, And known to all by name of Catty; We come to claim her for a bride; Come, father! let the pair be tied To him who loves her ever well:-

Watt still within, answers;

So ye say, but time will tell; My daughter's very well at home, So ye may pack and homeward roam.

Ianto Gwyn exclaims, in resolute tones,

Your home no more she's doom'd to share, Like every marriageable fair, Her father's roof she quits for one Where she is mistress: woo'd and won, It now remains to see her wedded, And homeward brought and safely bedded; Unless you give her up, we swear The roof from off your house to tear, Burst in the doors, and batter walls To rescue her whom wedlock calls.

Another of the bridegroom's party then calls aloud, in a voice of authority,

Ho! peace in the king's name, here peace!

Let vaunts and taunting language cease; While we, the bridesmen, come to sue The favour to all bridesmen due, The daughter from the father's hand, And entertainment kindly bland.

Now the great Watt, the famous entrapper of moles, with airs mighty and grand, well befitting the dignity of the occasion-and however absurd our English brethren may term the custom, it is considered of serious importance with us-throws open the door of Catty's dwelling, sallies forth to give the querists a warm welcome, and as a preliminary helps them to dismount. After taking a little more refreshment, consisting of newly-baked oaten cakes, with b.u.t.ter and cheese, washed down with copious draughts of ale, they all remounted, and were joined by those of the bridegroom's party; the whole rustic cavalcade making their way towards the church. A motley a.s.semblage, in truth it was, but withal picturesque, and agreeable to contemplate, for every face was happy; save when now and then a cautious damsel, mounted behind her father or brother, would exhibit a touch of the dismals in the length of her features, on discovering that the _cwrw_ had any other effect but that of rendering her protector steady in his seat on the saddle. Almost every sort of animal, large or small, lame or blind, good or bad, seemed to have been pressed into the service, and reduced to the levelling system, and without regard to either size or quality, doomed to carry double.

And thus they went on at a walking pace, while the loud chat of many seemed drowned in the loud laughter and shouting of others, till now and then rebuked by some of the elders; who however, to little purpose, vociferated the words decency-propriety-sober purposes-&c. &c., the tendency of which seemed but little understood. Jack, the happy bridegroom elect, bestrode a wretched apology for a horse, whose antiquated legs trembled like an aspen leaf; as for its bones, they were painfully apparent, and the very curs seemed, as they looked upon this time worn piece of cattle, to antic.i.p.ate their feast. Elevated behind her temporary father on a fleet horse of the squire's, poor Catty was doomed to present purgatory to contrast her enjoyment of future happiness, for, unprovided with a pillion, she sat on the crupper, holding fast by Watt's coat. The quiet pace which commenced this little journey was soon changed into rough horsemans.h.i.+p, for the mad-cap mole-catcher turning his steed into the Cardigan road, gave him the spur, and commenced an outrageous gallop; the wedding party followed him with all the might of their little beasts, and like valiant villagers in chase of a highwayman, strove their utmost to rescue the bride. Ianto Gwyn, the rural bard and harper, ever ready with an extempore, produced on this occasion:-

Oh yes! lost, strayed, or run away This moment from the king's highway, A tall and sightly strapping woman, A circ.u.mstance which is a rum 'un; 'Tis said a murderer of vermin On her abduction did determine; Whoe'er will bear to gaol th' offender, The lost one to her owner render, Shall be as handsomely rewarded, As can be readily afforded.

Having considerably distanced his pursuers, he stopped at length, at Catty's request, who complained sadly of being sorely b.u.mped upon the buckle of the crupper. Dexterously turning to the bye-road toward the church, he was soon perceived and followed by the party, and altogether they soon arrived at their journey's end, and alighting, they entered the sacred fane with due decorum. Evans the curate, to enhance his own services and increase his importance, took care to damp their hilarity by keeping them waiting full three quarters of an hour, before he made his appearance; and when he came, his looks and demeanour partook more of the rigid priest of Saturn, than the heart-joining, bliss-dispensing Hymen.

His cherished plans, which were to result in a discovery of dishonour to poor Catty, were terribly overthrown by this decent Welsh marriage, and the curate was in a corresponding temper. His nature was not such as would rejoice at virtue triumphant, more especially as he had calculated upon vice occupying the same position.

He very sternly rebuked their smiles and happy looks, and actually threatened not to perform the marriage ceremony, until, alarmed at the menace, they all became perfectly joyless, and most orthodoxically gloomy. The indissoluble knot was soon tied; and no longer dependent on the good offices of the magisterial churchman, their spirit of joyousness burst forth; while in the churchyard the mellow harp of Ianto Gwyn was playing the sprightly air of _Morwynion Glan Meirionydd_, or the Fair Maids of Merioneths.h.i.+re; while many of the party joined in the words which belong to that beautiful and animating tune. Suddenly changing the air, the eccentric harper struck up "Megan has lost her garter," which was succeeded by "Mentra Gwen," and a string of such national melodies, equally gay and appropriate.

After the marriage ceremony, they returned in much the same order, or rather disorder; with the difference that the bride sat behind her husband, instead of her father; the harper playing the whole time, and many sweet voices joining in the words of the airs.

Coming to Catty's house, the company found that Juggy had been useful and hospitable. There was a first-rate dinner provided, in ample proportions, of which all could and did partake freely; every one had to pay for his own ale, but the females, by courtesy, were "treated" at the expense of males. In the course of the evening, jigs, reels, and country dances, were successfully gone through with much spirit. Catty danced with much agility; Jack, pressed on all sides, and at length compelled to make one in a country dance, showed every indication of this being his virgin attempt at "the poetry of motion;" and alternately stumping and blowing, while copious streams ran down his rugged forehead, as they every instant corrected his erratic course, and literally pushed him down the dance, he vowed that this his first, should also be his last exhibition on the "light fantastic toe."

Young Twm, who had been playing at sweethearts, with little Gwenny Cadwgan on his knee, to the great mirth of his seniors, soon brought her out to try her foot at the dance with him. The poor little wench blushed scarlet deep, made her first essay with one equally young and inexperienced with herself; and the juvenile pair were very good-naturedly instructed in the figure of the dance, and they contributed not a little to the general harmony. Juggy, the sister of Catty, absolutely refused to sport her figure among the dancers, and treated Watt the mole-catcher with a hard favour in the face for attempting to drag her in perforce. At length, fatigued with the dancing, and alarmed for the state of their inebriated friends and companions, many, especially the females, turned their serious thoughts towards home.

It was now drawing towards the hour of retiring for the night, when the usual trick was played of concealing the bride from the bridegroom. Poor Jack, whom nature had not favoured with a great share of facetiousness, and who never mixed with such a company before, began to be seriously alarmed. Great was the mirth of the company, while, with a strange expression of countenance, he sought her up and down in every corner of the house. At length he discovered a part of her red petticoat sticking out from under the bottom of the straw arm-chair, and soon drew her out from the place of concealment.

The parting hour had now arrived; then came the general shaking of hands, and serious expressions of good wishes among the sober; while the tipsy folks vented their wit in jocular allusions to their conjugal felicity: some offering themselves for G.o.dfathers and G.o.dmothers to their future offspring, while others far gone in drink, laid bets on the probability that the first child would be either a boy or a girl. At this time considerable surprise was excited by the conduct of an individual who had been remarkably unsocial the whole evening, no person having heard him speak a word; and when asked a question, or in answer to a health being drank, he merely nodded in a hurried manner, and immediately drew hard at his pipe, and puffed forth volumes of smoke, as if to envelop himself in a cloud of invisibility.

The mysterious stranger had been evidently "taking stock" the whole of the evening, but whether pleased or displeased with the proceedings did not appear, as reticence seemed to be about the only accomplishment he possessed. Every one was too much engaged with their own pleasure to give him much attention, and thus he remained till the moment of departure, when he was observed to stagger as he rose from his seat.

Somebody then observed, that it must have been with smoke and not the beer that affected his brains, as he drank but little; a remark that imputed n.i.g.g.ardly and curmudgeon propensities to him. Determined to give him something of a roast, a young farmer asked him, with a defying air, whether he had paid his _Pwython_.

"No!" roared the hitherto silent man, "but here it is-take it 'Catty' my girl, and much good may it do thee!" On which he put five golden angels into her hand. With emotions of wonder and grat.i.tude, while catching an eager glance at his face, Catty involuntarily exclaimed-"the squire!"

when he darted out, mounted his horse, as did the rest of the party, rode off, and disappeared.

CHAPTER IX.

TWM SHON CATTY improves under a more able tuition. Watt's vagaries, and the troubles and trials of a poor pedlar. Twm begins his apprentices.h.i.+p to a Cardigans.h.i.+re farmer.

Determined to witness the humble festivities of the "lowly train," Squire Gras.p.a.cre had been among them the whole evening, disguised like a rough mountaineer husbandman, and was heartily gratified, although his apparent incivility of conduct had nearly subjected him to harsh treatment from the jovial ale-fraught rustics, who, of course, but little relished his strange behaviour. His deficiency in the Welsh language had been concealed by alternately feigning deafness and drunkenness, which, with the aid of the pipe left him free from suspicion. The morning of Sunday after the wedding, which is called _Neithior_, being come, the happy pair stayed at home, receiving their friends who called with their good-will, which they manifested by the payment of _Pwython_. The day was drank out, but not as in every other respect, save the diminis.h.i.+ng of ale, each seemed to recollect it was the Sabbath, and tossed off their cups in quietness.

On Monday morning the supply of ale was exhausted, tottering legs waggled homeward, and all was again quiet. Like prudent accountants, Jack and Catty reckoned up the amount of their wedding gifts, and found the amount to be twenty-seven pounds eight s.h.i.+llings and sixpence, besides fourteen whole, and twenty-two half cheeses, the greater part of which they soon turned into cash.

In these days, when the value of money has been so much decreased, the amount of the _Pwython_, and presents at a Welsh wedding, have been known to reach more than treble the sum here stated; especially when the friends of the party have been numerous, and headed by the patronage of a wealthy and liberal master and mistress, who generally enlist their friends and visitors under the hymeneal banners of a faithful servant, the architects of whose humble fortunes they become, by laying themselves the foundation stone.

As, from this part of our history, the hero will rise in importance, those who have hitherto stood forward, must proportionably draw back, to give him due place; especially Jack and Catty; the grand drama of whose lives has been closed by a matrimonial union; whence, henceforth, they must sink into inconsiderable personages.

In consequence of the squire's liberality on the celebration of Catty's wedding, and a general report prevailing that he was inclined towards the Welsh, a protector of their customs, a general good-will towards him was manifested by the country people. But his popularity reached its culminating point when he gave forth the opinion that the Welsh female costume was a useful, elegant, and picturesque one, and for once, a scion of John Bull became popular with us.

When he eulogized the Welsh harp, and gave, in addition to various pieces of silver at different times, a golden angel to Ianto Gwyn for his performances at Jack and Catty's wedding, he gained a few steps more into their good opinion. But when he declared that bed courts.h.i.+p should not be abolished, there was a burst of enthusiasm in his favour in every breast, especially among the females. During this new impulse given to the reign of happiness, the great lady at the hall and her favourite curate hid their diminished heads; the former declaring that it was utterly impossible that the world could last many months longer, while such immorality and unG.o.dliness was practiced under the auspices of a declared patron.

Whether it was the influence of this alarm, or the bitterness of baffled malignity, that preyed on her mind, certain it is, she was soon thrown on a sick bed, and considered seriously indisposed. The squire, to his honour be it said, although unfortunately married to a very disagreeable woman, allowed a sense of duty to supply the place of affection, when his attentions were so indispensably needed. During her illness, the worthy old rector, who had been ill but a single week, died; and Squire Gras.p.a.cre, against his own judgment and feelings, well knowing that such an arrangement would be agreeable to his wife, inducted the curate, Evans, into the vacant living. In a fortnight after, however, she died herself; a circ.u.mstance, perhaps, that gave no real sorrow to any creature breathing.

The general report of a liberal English squire in Cardigans.h.i.+re, who patronized and upheld the customs of the Welsh, penetrated to the extremities of the neighbouring counties, and became at last so strangely exaggerated, that he was represented as the patron of the learned; consequently many of the humbler sons of the church took long journeys to be undeceived. Of the many who called upon him with a view of seeking his patronage of their literary undertakings, one especially took his fancy; a young clergyman named John David Rhys, before named as the author of the Bidder's song.

But poetry was not his forte; his energy and perseverance in the favourite study of Welshmen, British antiquities, and systemizing his native language, deserved encouragement and applause. He had been composing a Welsh grammar, and had actually commenced a dictionary. As he spoke English very well, the squire soon understood the merit of his undertakings, and promised his patronage and good offices; in the mean time requesting him to remain on the footing of a friend beneath his roof, till something could be done for him. This excellent person he now fixed upon to succeed Evans in the school and curacy; stipulating, that for his fulfilment of the latter, he was to have thirty pounds, and for the former ten pounds a-year.

Fortunate for Rhys would it have been had the old rector outlived the squire's lady, in which case it is more than probable he would have filled the living instead of Evans, whom the squire never liked. The change was a fortunate one for Twm Shon Catty, who, as we have before seen, had already a name for composing doggerel, and had even tried his muse in the orthodox four-and-twenty Welsh measures. When he found his new master a kind young man, an historian, antiquarian, and something of a poet, the homage of the heart was immediately paid him. Twm thought he was the wisest man in the world, when he heard him speak of the battles fought by the Britons in ancient times, against the Romans, Danes, and Saxons. This was to him a knowledge the most estimable, and he longed to be enabled also to talk about battles and to write patriotic songs.

Having now his information from a better source, he soon learnt to despise the jargon and misstatements of Ianto Gwyn, with whom he argued boldly, and proved to him that Geoffry of Monmouth was a fabulist, and no historian; that it was not Joseph of Arimathea who christianized Britain, but Bran ab Llyr, the father of renowned Caractacus, with various other such knotty points.

The great deference which he paid his master, his attention to every word which fell from his lips, with his close and successful application to his lessons, gained him the esteem and admiration of Rhys, with whom he became a great favourite. The amiable young clergyman found much satisfaction on discovering a youngster with taste, sufficient to appreciate his favourite pursuits, and took pleasure in explaining to him every subject of his enquiries. A thirst for information possessed the boy; and he rummaged the most dry and tedious works connected with Welsh antiquities, with an avidity that was astonis.h.i.+ng even to his master.

It would perhaps have been fortunate for Twm had this thirst for study remained unchecked by any less n.o.ble desire. But joking and learning, "larks" and Latin, practical jests and Welsh history, are scarcely likely to agree well. Watt the mole-catcher occupied his attention, and, in the end, his acquaintance with that personage was an ill wind which blew n.o.body good.

About eighteen months after Rhys's appointment to the school, one evening in the Christmas holidays, Watt asked him if he would take a share in a freak that would keep him up the greater part of the night. Twm immediately a.s.sented, without enquiring its nature; enough for him it was that it was a scheme of merry mischief, in the prospect of which his heart ever bounded.

This idle whim of Watt's was nothing more than to pull down the signs of all the public-houses and shops; which being few, was easily done, but the greater difficulty was to suspend them from, or attach them to, the tenements of others, in which they however succeeded. This trick elicited some humour; and a satirical application was discernible in the new disposal of the boards. When the light of day discovered their handy-work, great was the astonishment of the ale-house-keepers and others, to find their signs vanished, and gracing the fronts of their neighbours' private houses; and the anger of the reverend Inco Evans was boundless, on perceiving the "Fox and Goose" over the rectory house door, with the words proceeding from the mouth of reynard, "I have thee now;"

and under the pictorial figures "Good entertainment for man or horse."

A crowd was in consequence collected about his door, and the provoking laughter of the people stung him to the bitterest degree of resentment.

A most unlucky old carl of a Scotch pedlar at this moment very innocently entered the house, taking it, as the sign imported, for a tavern, and unstrapping his huge pack, laid it on the clerical magistrate's table, calling about, "hollow! Fox and Goose;" on which the reverend host and his spouse appeared, she laughing at the jest, and he frowning with the aspect of a demon.

"Ah ye 're come," said the facetious Scot, "by my saul aw never kenn'd twa that looked the characters sa weal afore-a merry guse an a sour fox!

come gi us a pot of your best half and half." The lady ran out laughing, but Inco sourly answered, "O yes! friend, thou shalt have half and half to thy heart's content;" and turning his back, shut and locked the door, leaving the poor pedlar in gaping wonderment.