Pirates Part 6

MRS. ROMNEY. I didn't! Nothing of the sort, Betty! It was you yourself, Mrs. Lawty, who told Mrs. Pickering, who told----

MRS. PICKERING. Me? I had nothing at all to do with it ... nothing at all. I only know that Mrs. Lawer said----

MRS. LAWER. I said? I said nothing. It was Mrs. Lawty, who told Mrs.

Pickering, who told Mrs. Romney--oh, dear me, I mean----

MRS. ROMNEY. It's a d.a.m.n lie!

LADIES. (_They all gasp for breath; all begin to talk at once_) I heard that Doctor Hunter--You told me that he treated his wife shamefully--No, I said--Flowers, he sent her flowers every morning--You told Mrs.

Pickering that he was a conversationalist--She said a revolutionist--I said--You said--And then she said--Anyway, I do not believe he is a safe person. But very good looking, my dear. Etc.

BETTY. Oh, dear ... what is it all about?

MRS. ROMNEY. You, my dear, you.

BETTY. Me?

MRS. ROMNEY. These ladies said that you----

MRS. LAWTY. These ladies!

LADIES. (_They all begin to talk at once again_) Why, it was she herself who said--I had nothing to do with it at all--All I know about the whole affair is that--The impertinence of her saying--I didn't say a word about---- Etc.

MRS. WARREN. It was all of them ... every one of them. They said you had--oh, dear, I just can't say it! They came here to tell me you had eloped with ... with a married man ... with Doctor Hunter!

BETTY. Ladies! Mother! How dare you! (_She runs to her mother._) How dare you say such a thing! (_To her mother_) My poor, dear Mother!

MRS. WARREN. And it is so untrue. Oh! Clara ... Clara! My smelling-salts ... my smelling-salts! I'm going to faint ... I'm going to faint ... I'm going to faint!

MRS. ROMNEY. (_Running to MRS. WARREN_) Here, use mine, my dear, use mine.

MRS. LAWTY. But the letter, Mrs. Warren.

MRS. WARREN. (_She has been fanning herself furiously with the letter.

She suddenly holds it up as if it might be a bomb ready to go off in her hand._) The letter! Oh! Take it ... take it ... take it away!

BETTY. (_Taking the letter_) Why, it is a note from----

LADIES. (_On the very edges of their chairs_) Yes?

BETTY. From Mrs. Hunter.

LADIES. Oh. (_They watch BETTY curiously as she reads the note._)

BETTY. Mother, Mrs. Hunter asks if I might go for a carriage drive with her this afternoon to gather wild flowers. She is going to stop for me.

She says the doctor told her how very fond I am of flowers.

MRS. WARREN. (_With a great sigh of relief_) Oh!

BETTY. May I go?

MRS. WARREN. Why, yes, dear, if you think----

MRS. ROMNEY. I fear these ladies were quite mistaken about----

MRS. LAWTY. These ladies, indeed! Do you not include yourself,--that is to say, are you not one of us?

MRS. ROMNEY. G.o.d forbid!

LADIES. Oh!

(_The knocker sounds._)

MRS. WARREN. Clara ... Clara!

(_CLARA enters from the Left._)

CLARA. Did you call me, ma'am?

MRS. WARREN. Clara, there is someone at the door.

CLARA. Very well, ma'am. (_She goes out._)

MRS. PICKERING. I am sure Mrs. Warren will forgive our very grave mistake. But it was for her sake that----

BETTY. How could you ever dream of worrying my dear mother by such scandalous gossip? It is shameful!

MRS. WARREN. Betty ... Betty!

MRS. LAWTY. You, my dear, are still too young to understand.

(_CLARA enters._)

MRS. LAWER. I fear we were overquick in our judgment.

MRS. WARREN. Yes, Clara?

CLARA. It is Mrs. Hunter, ma'am.

MRS. WARREN. Mrs. Hunter? Do have her come right in, Clara.

CLARA. Yes, ma'am. Shall I bring more tea, ma'am?

MRS. WARREN. Yes, Clara ... and cake, Clara.

CLARA. Yes, ma'am. (_She goes out._)

LADIES. Oh, shall we stay? Or shall we go? It might be embarra.s.sing--I am sure Mrs. Hunter----