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Now, to-day, however, he had her all to himself. He would put an end to the situation that troubled him, and vexed him, day after day, month after month. Beyond question, the moment had come for something definite, he could not say precisely what. Readjusting his cigar between his teeth, he resumed his speech. It suited his humour to take the girl into his confidence, following an instinct which warned him that this would bring about a certain closeness of their relations, a certain intimacy.
"What do you think of this row, anyways, Miss Hilma,--this railroad fuss in general? Think Shelgrim and his rushers are going to jump Quien Sabe--are going to run us off the ranch?"
"Oh, no, sir," protested Hilma, still breathless. "Oh, no, indeed not."
"Well, what then?"
Hilma made a little uncertain movement of ignorance.
"I don't know what."
"Well, the League agreed to-day that if the test cases were lost in the Supreme Court--you know we've appealed to the Supreme Court, at Was.h.i.+ngton--we'd fight."
"Fight?"
"Yes, fight."
"Fight like--like you and Mr. Delaney that time with--oh, dear--with guns?"
"I don't know," grumbled Annixter vaguely. "What do YOU think?"
Hilma's low-pitched, almost husky voice trembled a little as she replied, "Fighting--with guns--that's so terrible. Oh, those revolvers in the barn! I can hear them yet. Every shot seemed like the explosion of tons of powder."
"Shall we clear out, then? Shall we let Delaney have possession, and S.
Behrman, and all that lot? Shall we give in to them?"
"Never, never," she exclaimed, her great eyes flas.h.i.+ng.
"YOU wouldn't like to be turned out of your home, would you, Miss Hilma, because Quien Sabe is your home isn't it? You've lived here ever since you were as big as a minute. You wouldn't like to have S. Behrman and the rest of 'em turn you out?"
"N-no," she murmured. "No, I shouldn't like that. There's mamma and----"
"Well, do you think for one second I'm going to let 'em?" cried Annixter, his teeth tightening on his cigar. "You stay right where you are. I'll take care of you, right enough. Look here," he demanded abruptly, "you've no use for that roaring lush, Delaney, have you?"
"I think he is a wicked man," she declared. "I know the Railroad has pretended to sell him part of the ranch, and he lets Mr. S. Behrman and Mr. Ruggles just use him."
"Right. I thought you wouldn't be keen on him."
There was a long pause. The buckskin began blowing among the pebbles, nosing for gra.s.s, and Annixter s.h.i.+fted his cigar to the other corner of his mouth.
"Pretty place," he muttered, looking around him. Then he added: "Miss Hilma, see here, I want to have a kind of talk with you, if you don't mind. I don't know just how to say these sort of things, and if I get all balled up as I go along, you just set it down to the fact that I've never had any experience in dealing with feemale girls; understand? You see, ever since the barn dance--yes, and long before then--I've been thinking a lot about you. Straight, I have, and I guess you know it.
You're about the only girl that I ever knew well, and I guess," he declared deliberately, "you're about the only one I want to know.
It's my nature. You didn't say anything that time when we stood there together and Delaney was playing the fool, but, somehow, I got the idea that you didn't want Delaney to do for me one little bit; that if he'd got me then you would have been sorrier than if he'd got any one else.
Well, I felt just that way about you. I would rather have had him shoot any other girl in the room than you; yes, or in the whole State. Why, if anything should happen to you, Miss Hilma--well, I wouldn't care to go on with anything. S. Behrman could jump Quien Sabe, and welcome. And Delaney could shoot me full of holes whenever he got good and ready.
I'd quit. I'd lay right down. I wouldn't care a whoop about anything any more. You are the only girl for me in the whole world. I didn't think so at first. I didn't want to. But seeing you around every day, and seeing how pretty you were, and how clever, and hearing your voice and all, why, it just got all inside of me somehow, and now I can't think of anything else. I hate to go to San Francisco, or Sacramento, or Visalia, or even Bonneville, for only a day, just because you aren't there, in any of those places, and I just rush what I've got to do so as I can get back here. While you were away that Christmas time, why, I was as lonesome as--oh, you don't know anything about it. I just scratched off the days on the calendar every night, one by one, till you got back.
And it just comes to this, I want you with me all the time. I want you should have a home that's my home, too. I want to take care of you, and have you all for myself, you understand. What do you say?"
Hilma, standing up before him, retied a knot in her handkerchief bundle with elaborate precaution, blinking at it through her tears.
"What do you say, Miss Hilma?" Annixter repeated. "How about that? What do you say?"
Just above a whisper, Hilma murmured:
"I--I don't know."
"Don't know what? Don't you think we could hit it off together?"
"I don't know."
"I know we could, Hilma. I don't mean to scare you. What are you crying for?" "I don't know."
Annixter got up, cast away his cigar, and dropping the buckskin's bridle, came and stood beside her, putting a hand on her shoulder. Hilma did not move, and he felt her trembling. She still plucked at the knot of the handkerchief. "I can't do without you, little girl," Annixter continued, "and I want you. I want you bad. I don't get much fun out of life ever. It, sure, isn't my nature, I guess. I'm a hard man. Everybody is trying to down me, and now I'm up against the Railroad. I'm fighting 'em all, Hilma, night and day, lock, stock, and barrel, and I'm fighting now for my home, my land, everything I have in the world. If I win out, I want somebody to be glad with me. If I don't--I want somebody to be sorry for me, sorry with me,--and that somebody is you. I am dog-tired of going it alone. I want some one to back me up. I want to feel you alongside of me, to give me a touch of the shoulder now and then. I'm tired of fighting for THINGS--land, property, money. I want to fight for some PERSON--somebody beside myself. Understand? want to feel that it isn't all selfishness--that there are other interests than mine in the game--that there's some one dependent on me, and that's thinking of me as I'm thinking of them--some one I can come home to at night and put my arm around--like this, and have her put her two arms around me--like--"
He paused a second, and once again, as it had been in that moment of imminent peril, when he stood with his arm around her, their eyes met,--"put her two arms around me," prompted Annixter, half smiling, "like--like what, Hilma?"
"I don't know."
"Like what, Hilma?" he insisted.
"Like--like this?" she questioned. With a movement of infinite tenderness and affection she slid her arms around his neck, still crying a little.
The sensation of her warm body in his embrace, the feeling of her smooth, round arm, through the thinness of her sleeve, pressing against his cheek, thrilled Annixter with a delight such as he had never known.
He bent his head and kissed her upon the nape of her neck, where the delicate amber tint melted into the thick, sweet smelling ma.s.s of her dark brown hair. She s.h.i.+vered a little, holding him closer, ashamed as yet to look up. Without speech, they stood there for a long minute, holding each other close. Then Hilma pulled away from him, mopping her tear-stained cheeks with the little moist ball of her handkerchief.
"What do you say? Is it a go?" demanded Annixter jovially.
"I thought I hated you all the time," she said, and the velvety huskiness of her voice never sounded so sweet to him.
"And I thought it was that crockery smas.h.i.+ng goat of a lout of a cow-puncher."
"Delaney? The idea! Oh, dear! I think it must always have been you."
"Since when, Hilma?" he asked, putting his arm around her. "Ah, but it is good to have you, my girl," he exclaimed, delighted beyond words that she permitted this freedom. "Since when? Tell us all about it."
"Oh, since always. It was ever so long before I came to think of you--to, well, to think about--I mean to remember--oh, you know what I mean. But when I did, oh, THEN!"
"Then what?"
"I don't know--I haven't thought--that way long enough to know."
"But you said you thought it must have been me always."
"I know; but that was different--oh, I'm all mixed up. I'm so nervous and trembly now. Oh," she cried suddenly, her face overcast with a look of earnestness and great seriousness, both her hands catching at his wrist, "Oh, you WILL be good to me, now, won't you? I'm only a little, little child in so many ways, and I've given myself to you, all in a minute, and I can't go back of it now, and it's for always. I don't know how it happened or why. Sometimes I think I didn't wish it, but now it's done, and I am glad and happy. But NOW if you weren't good to me--oh, think of how it would be with me. You are strong, and big, and rich, and I am only a servant of yours, a little n.o.body, but I've given all I had to you--myself--and you must be so good to me now. Always remember that. Be good to me and be gentle and kind to me in LITTLE things,--in everything, or you will break my heart."
Annixter took her in his arms. He was speechless. No words that he had at his command seemed adequate. All he could say was:
"That's all right, little girl. Don't you be frightened. I'll take care of you. That's all right, that's all right."
For a long time they sat there under the shade of the great trestle, their arms about each other, speaking only at intervals. An hour pa.s.sed.
The buckskin, finding no feed to her taste, took the trail stablewards, the bridle dragging. Annixter let her go. Rather than to take his arm from around Hilma's waist he would have lost his whole stable. At last, however, he bestirred himself and began to talk. He thought it time to formulate some plan of action.