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The Last Boss Witch Will Keep Her Past Self's Crush Until Her Dying Day Chapter 25

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The moment I heard that we were going to cross the valley with magic, I had a bad premonition.
Sonia cast a wind attribute chant and put the bridge on the valley. 
We are going to walk on a bridge created by the wind blowing from below, in other words, the path made of invisible air.
I nervously took Sonia's hand into mine. I can't afford to spare my mind to the event that would normally make me feel fl.u.s.tered.

"Fufu, are you scared?"

"Don't let go of my hand no matter what!"

"Is that an act?" 

I was pulled by Sonia and stepped off the edge of the cliff. I felt a strong wind pressure on the soles of my feet, but it wasn't strong enough to make me spring. If I had to compare it to something, it had the same sense of instability as a repelled magnet suspended mid-air. Both going forward and staying in the spot was frightening.

I didn't think of myself as somebody who had a fear of heights, but I might have nightmares about this.
Swearing that I absolutely wouldn't look down, I fixed my gaze on our connected hands. I don't know whether I was trembling because of the unsteady footing or the fear. I felt as if I was drunk.

The moment my feet touched the land on the other side, I kneeled on the spot. My body, wet with sweat, was chilly and I couldn't get up easily. I glared resentfully at Sonia, which laughed at me with「You're like a newborn calf, how cute」. It took several minutes to return to my calm.

When I heard that she was visiting her father's grave (?) I thought that she was lovable, but Sonia's personality is warped, as expected. She's definitely playing with me. There should've been much easier ways to cross over.
Or was she trying to lighten up the awkward atmosphere?

"Haa…"

Thinking wouldn't get me anywhere, so I gave up and started walking towards the rocky area where we could excavate Thundersalt Crystals.
Acting mindful seemed stupid already so I asked about what was bothering me.

"You don't remember your father because you were too small, right? Did that Elder granny tell you about what kind of person he was?"

"Yes, just a little. Although, just as I've said before, I've mastered the art of past-seeing, so I do have vague impressions about him. I couldn't see him well because I was seeing through a toddler's sight, but there was one time when he held me."

Now that she mentions it, I feel like Sonia said something about seeing past when Prince Rain suspected her of having the power of precognition.
Sonia longingly narrowed her eyes.

"Father acted flawlessly outside, but at home, he was always an aloof, quiet person. Just as you would expect from somebody which enchanted Jebera, his face was good. It was more androgynous than manly and very bewitching. Most impressionable were his beautiful――"

Sonia's feet came to a sudden stop.

"….."

"What's wrong?"

Sonia froze stiff, simply staring at my face. Her expression was different from any of which I have seen so far, a mix of astonishment and frustration. Agitation of my always composed master made even me feel uneasy. 

"It's nothing. I just thought of something impossible….I might've been a little careless."

"Huh?"

Sonia tucked her hair, which was disheveled by the wind, behind her ears and gracefully smiled.
Oh, I knew that expression. It means that she'll definitely not share what she was just thinking about.

I couldn't say anything. 
I'm not qualified to deeply step into her heart. I haven't resolved myself for it. 

We found the rocky area with Thundersalt Crystal shortly thereafter. Swinging the pickaxe, I silently excavated. When I tried to lick the Thundersalt Crystal just like how Sonia recommended, I felt saltiness as if thunder had fallen on me. 

"*cough*"

It seems to be also used as an ingredient for stimulants. 
After gulping down the water,「this would be useful during overnight missions」, I unknowingly muttered. I was surprised that the way of thinking from my knight age had still remained. Since it was a good chance, I decided to take some crystals for myself.
After collecting about 10 fist-sized lumps as if we were going to sell them off, the material collection ended safely. 

I prepared a small tent at the side of the rocky area before sunset. There's a barrier set by Sonia around the surroundings and witches seem to instinctively avoid Thundersalt Crystals, so we should be able to pa.s.s tonight safely.

Sonia made a soup with mushrooms and mountain herbs. I soaked hard bread into the soup and gnawed on dried meat in between. Both the taste and quant.i.ty is significantly inferior than the sandwiches I ate at noon, but it can't be helped. We'll return to the village by tomorrow noon. Then, at night I should be able to eat delicious things to my heart's content again.

Before I had noticed, I had been living in quite a luxury. My stomach is completely dependent on Sonia.
Right now I probably wouldn't be able to swallow Emerald's charcoal-burnt cooking. While finding it regrettable, I still felt relieved. It's a complicated feeling.

As I cleaned up the meal and wiped down my body with the heat up water, the night became deeper. There's no wind but it's chilly. I threw more firewood on the fire.

"Do you want to sleep with me, Will?"

I responded seriously to that joking tone.

"I refuse. I'll be fine even if I don't sleep for a night. I'll be keeping watch so don't worry about me and go to sleep."

There's only one tent. And naturally, it belongs to Sonia.
I want her to rest properly. Sonia seemed weird from the midway onward. She often got lost in her thoughts and was letting out a sharp air. Though every time she caught me looking, she played it off as if she was fine.

"I'm not going to sleep for a while."

Sonia didn't go inside the tent and instead sat down next to me. Sitting together with her before the bonfire reminds me of that night.

The night I learned the cruel truth and was knocked down.
The cries of sky dragons still do not leave my ears.
It was undoubtedly the worst night of my life.
I can't live anymore, I can't trust anybody anymore. That's how I thought and despaired.

Still, even now I am alive. I am looking forward to tomorrow's meal.
If I'm asked thanks to whom it happened, I will unhesitatingly answer with Sonia's name. I was saved by this witch.

While holding her knees, Sonia muttered a few words.

"Are you planning on disappearing one day, Will? are you dissatisfied with your current life?"

Having been completely found out, I stiffened up.

Delicious meal and the bed, a peaceful time.
The elders, which turn hatred aside and innocently laughing children. I'm not sure if I could call them friends, but I've also gotten close to the Phantom family to the point of going drinking together. 
The housework and ch.o.r.es aren't hard because Sonia shows me appreciation every time.
Fieldwork is a good exercise and the harvested vegetables and fruits are exceptionally delicious.
Taking care of Unika might've been a pain at first because he was really uncute, but after brus.h.i.+ng him every day, I started feeling attachment. When he started to eat carrots directly from my hand, I couldn't contain my joy.

I don't have to kill humans or magical beasts. I don't have to train so hard that my blood blisters burst.
I don't have to loath anybody.
I don't have to devote my life to my master and gaze at my beloved person which I will never attain.
I don't have to protect the kingdom. I don't have to live as the knight.

How comfortable it is.
The life which Sonia gave me was overflowing with so much tranquility, that it seeped through my mind and body.

Suddenly, I understood.
That I had been earning for a life like this.
I'm already sick of being held captive by hatred and living while constantly gritting my teeth,
…..Would people call this depravity?

Sonia showed a troubled smile and waited for my reply.

"I'm not dissatisfied. But I feel like yielding myself to the peace wouldn't be permitted."

That night, all of myself was denied by the revealed truth. Now I myself am trying to deny the 20 years I've lived.
Wondering whether the days I've endured were all a waste and wrong.
Ever since I was asked how I could keep laughing, I started to feel afraid of 「somebody's」gaze. If I didn't walk on the harshest path, I would be immediately criticized. I mustn't become happy. I mustn't be at peace. That's how I felt.

"Whose permission do you need? You haven't done anything wrong, Will. If you find comfort in your current life and feel guilty towards your deceased parents, Prince Rain and that girl, that's all my fault."

Sonia looked up at the night sky and confessed her sins as if she was offering up a song.

"I was the one who made that happen. I broke everything that was in your core, everything you held dear without leaving a single trace and gave you new things instead. I prepared everything that you wished for. I guided you so you would unintentionally reach out your hand."

That's wrong, I shook my head.
I'm not so stupid to take those words at face value.
Just how much does Sonia plan to spoil me? She's trying to become an outlet for my guilt and let me rest at ease.

"Don't worry about your honor. Choose as your heart desires, Will. Do you want to stay here or leave?"

Sonia is infinitely kind to me.
That's why it's so hard to leave her.
This girl is looking at me. She understands me better than anybody else.
It's frightening, but also comfortable at the same time.
I feel like I've been placed inside the cage without a lock. I want to cry.

"Are you not going to detain me?"

Sonia giggled.

"I will think about it if the necessity arrives."

In the end, Sonia seemed to be convinced that I would stay in Cucurouge.
Now wonder. Thinking rationally, you wouldn't throw out this kind of lifestyle.
The rest is the matter of my heart.

"I don't want to pathetically cling to you. But, yeah..I'm thinking of working hard on saving up for a while. To use a more vulgar expression, I'm going to rake in money."

"Huh? what's up all of sudden?"

There are greedy witches, but I'm sure that Sonia isn't one.

"I was contemplating rebuilding the house. That mansion is so big that it's hard to maintain. Besides, there are a lot of b.l.o.o.d.y memories at that place. Especially the bas.e.m.e.nt, if I don't bury it….."

I've never entered the bas.e.m.e.nt. It's been closed off.
It's a place where once Alonia used to conduct her research on Rose Gem and abuse Phantom and other test subjects.
….I see. So until now I've been living in a house where many people died. My stomach chilled.

"What do you think, Will?"

"I think that it's, well, a good idea…but are you going to build it in Cucurouge?"

"That's right."

After thinking for a while, I asked with a serious expression.

"Are you not going to get married? If you set up a house before your partner is settled and you end up marrying in the family, it'll all end up going to waste."

Sonia also took some time and answered with a dazzling smile.

"I'm not going to get married while you're here, Will."

"?………………………………….!"

As I was thinking about the meaning of her words, my face gradually got hotter. It was because I imagined something weird.

No, wait. I'm really not sure about what she meant.
I wonder where place I hold in Sonia's future plans?

I don't want to take on debts though, so it'll have to wait quite a while, making such a preface, Sonia told me.

"I wonder if this is my own way of holding you back. Try also thinking about the new house, Will.

"New house…."

Only happy images appeared from that word.
With all the hateful memories erased, alone with Sonia, forever…

If I continue this kind of life for a few more years, the feelings of guilt and immorality will wear out and disappear. The future me will probably be able to laugh without any worries.
That's the kind of premonition I had.

The next day, as we returned from the forest, we were contacted by the Aspinel family.
They said that the new species of Magic Fever was identified in the rural areas of Azurite.


Notes:
>Will realizing that he can't eat Emerald's s.h.i.+tty cooking 

First stage of the plan "Great Cuck of Cucurouge" has concluded.
Initializing the second stage.

I had a slight argument about "is that an act?" part so I'm more than usual unsure about the translation. The raw of that was 「それはフリ?」at first I thought that フリ was literal "free", like "are you giving me a free service? (since you're saying that you want to keep holding hands), but then it came to my attention that this is most likely just your good 'ole "furi" as in outting on an act or pretending, so I personally a.s.sume that Sonia is asking him if he's acting scared because he wants to keep holding her hand, but there might be a different nuance there. Hmu if you're sure about the right version.

The question mark after "visiting her father's grave" was in the raw.
いじらしい loveable

懐かしむ longingly
焦燥 can be uneasiness, impatience, irritation
踏み入る step into, treach into
気づけ薬 stimulants? well, it's gotta be something along that line
I'm honestly not fully sure about what 売却用 is but google is telling me that it's connected to selling

Don't forget to notify me about mistranslation, typos, awkward grammar and whatnot

P.S Prince POV next time so we'll get to meet the lOnG AwAitEd Emerald.

P.P.S. contemplating picking up, maybe, dunno, I kinda want something new but I don't want to start from the very beginning either :'

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The Last Boss Witch Will Keep Her Past Self's Crush Until Her Dying Day Chapter 25 summary

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