The Adventurous Simplicissimus being the description of the Life of a Strange vagabond named Melchior Sternfels von Fuchshaim Part 2

"G.o.d save us," answered the hermit, "art thou demented or very cunning?"

"Nay," said I, "I am my mammy's and dad's boy, and neither Master Demented nor Master Cunning."

Then the hermit shewed his amazement with sighs and crossing of himself, and says he, "'Tis well, dear child, I am determined if G.o.d will better to instruct thee."

So then our questions and answers fell out as the ensuing chapter sheweth.

_Chap. viii._: HOW SIMPLICISSIMUS BY HIS n.o.bLE DISCOURSE PROCLAIMED HIS EXCELLENT QUALITIES

Hermit. What is thy name?

Simplicissimus. My name is "Lad."

H. I can see well enough that thou art no girl: but how did thy father and mother call thee?

S. I never had either father or mother.

H. Who gave thee then thy s.h.i.+rt?

S. Oho! Why, my mammy.

H. What did thy mother call thee?

S. She called me "Lad," ay, and "rogue, silly gaby, and gallowsbird."

H. Who, then, was thy mammy's husband?

S. No one.

H. With whom, then, did thy mammy sleep at night?

S. With my dad.

H. What did thy dad call thee?

S. He called me "Lad."

H. What was his name?

S. His name was Dad.

H. What did thy mammy call him?

S. Dad, and sometimes also "Master."

H. Did she never call him aught besides?

S. Yea, that did she.

H. And what then?

S. "Beast," "coa.r.s.e brute," "drunken pig," and other the like, when she would scold him.

H. Thou beest but an ignorant creature, that knowest not thy parents'

name nor thine own.

S. Oho! neither dost thou know it.

H. Canst thou say thy prayers?

S. Nay, my mammy and our Ursel did uprear the beds.

H. I ask thee not that, but whether thou knowest thy Paternoster?

S. That do I.

H. Say it then.

S. Our father which art heaven, hallowed be name, to thy kingdom come, thy will come down on earth as it says heaven, give us debts as we give our debtors: lead us not into no temptation, but deliver us from the kingdom, the power, and the glory, for ever and ever. Amen.

H. G.o.d help us! Knowest thou naught of our Blessed Lord G.o.d?

S. Yea, yea: 'tis he that stood by our chamber-door; my mammy brought him home from the church feast and stuck him up there.

H. O Gracious G.o.d, now for the first time do I perceive what a great favour and benefit it is when Thou impartest knowledge of Thyself, and how naught a man is to whom Thou givest it not! O Lord, vouchsafe to me so to honour Thy holy name that I be worthy to be as zealous in my thanks for this great grace as Thou hast been liberal in the granting of it. Hark now, Simplicissimus (for I can call thee by no other name), when thou sayest thy Paternoster, thou must say this: "Our Father which art in heaven, hallowed be Thy name: Thy kingdom come: Thy will be done in earth as it is in heaven: give us this day our daily bread ..."

S. Oho there! ask for cheese too!

H. Ah, dear child, keep silence and learn that thou needest more than cheese: thou art indeed loutish, as thy mammy told thee: 'tis not the part of lads like thee to interrupt an old man, but to be silent, to listen, and to learn. Did I but know where thy parents dwelt, I would fain bring thee to them, and then teach them how to bring up children.

S. I know not whither to go. Our house is burnt, and my mammy ran off and was fetched back with our Ursula, and my dad too, and our maid was sick and lying in the stable.

H. And who did burn the house?

S. Aha! there came iron men that sat on things as big as oxen, yet having no horns: which same men did slaughter sheep and cows and swine, and so I ran too, and then was the house burnt.

H. Where was thy dad then?

S. Aha! the iron men tied him up and our old goat was set to lick his feet. So he must needs laugh, and give the iron men many silver pennies, big and little, and fair yellow things and some that glittered, and fine strings full of little white b.a.l.l.s.

H. And when did this come to pa.s.s?

S. Why, even when I should have been keeping of sheep: yea, and they would even take from me my bagpipe.

H. But when was it that thou shouldst have been keeping sheep?