If You Don't Go To Hell, Who Will? Chapter 1

Basketball in hand, I looked up at the hoop indignantly . There it stood, proud and aloof . It was clearly stationary, and yet, it was harder to hit than a moving target . I already made ten shots, nine of which were air b.a.l.l.s . The other hit the backboard, but after bouncing off, it just hit me on the head…

I guess a basketball is a pretty good weapon to torture yourself with . I’m not one to torture myself, but thinking about the couple hundred yuan reward, I decided to bear it .

The school’s basketball club was holding a hoop-shooting compet.i.tion in a week . They were forming a female team, and first place wins 500 yuan . I’m someone who loves money but has no money . Like a banana tree in the desert needs water, I need money . So for that large sum of money, I gladly signed up .

But now, as I looked toward that grand basketball hoop, I couldn’t help feeling discouraged .

Suddenly, a basketball flew past the three-point line, headed straight for the hoop, as if it had a navigator installed in it .

Swis.h.!.+

Astonished, I turned around to see which pa.s.sing G.o.d came to shame me . But when I saw who it was, my face turned red, my heart thumped, and my adrenaline rushed…

My body reacted the way any infatuated girl’s would .

Because right in front of me, there was Lu Zijian .

Who’s Lu Zijian, you ask? He’s the basketball team captain from the School of Chemistry . Tall and handsome, refined and courteous . He’s also on the Student Council . Last year, he won the Top Excellence school scholars.h.i.+p… In any case, Lu Zijian was a person to be infatuated over .

So my reaction was totally normal .

Then I saw the person behind Lu Zijian—Zhong Yuan . And I glared at him .

I hated Zhong Yuan . So very much .

There was an increasing number of people coming onto the court, and it was clear there wasn’t enough s.p.a.ce . Everyone tried to cooperate and share the s.p.a.ce, whether they knew each other or not . After all, it wasn’t out of the ordinary for several groups to use the court at the same time . Right now, I was lucky enough to be on the court with Lu Zijian . Unfortunately, Zhong Yuan was also there .

I glared at Zhong Yuan’s back, silently telling myself, “Ignite, my little world!”

Then I threw my basketball at him .

Zhong Yuan grabbed the back of his head and turned around . He looked at me, his brows furrowed . I held my hands out in a helpless gesture . With a smile, I excused myself, “Sorry, slipped out of my hand . ”

And then I picked up the ball and acted like I was about to practice shooting some more . My world started to burn again .

I realized that my skills weren’t really that bad . Although I wasn’t great at getting the ball in the hoop, I was quite accurate at hitting Zhong Yuan .

And so, Zhong Yuan’s white jersey soon became a patterned jersey .

ADVERTIs.e.m.e.nT

ADVERTIs.e.m.e.nT

Lu Zijian, who’d been focused on practicing, suddenly noticed, and he asked Zhong Yuan curiously, “Zhong Yuan, aren’t you usually a neat freak? Why are your clothes so dirty?”

Zhong Yuan didn’t reply, but instead glanced over at me with a not-quite-smiling expression .

I avoided his gaze guiltily and turned to Lu Zijian . With a big smile, I said, “Senior Lu, h.e.l.lo! I’m Mu Er from the School of Chemistry . ”

Lu Zijian chuckled and replied, “h.e.l.lo . You’re a first year, aren’t you?”

I nodded as I looked at him with bright eyes .

Lu Zijian looked a bit embarra.s.sed by how I was staring at him . He laughed again, and then suddenly, he said, “Your… hairstyle isn’t bad . It’s got character, haha…”

I touched the newly shaved head I got just a few days ago, and sorrow surged inside me .

Being bald isn’t my fault .

A long, long time ago… Like, two weeks ago, I still had a lovely, elegant head of hair . But who would have thought that a single bet would suddenly and quietly change its fate?

The university’s basketball tournament was in full swing . Though I don’t have much interest in basketball, I am interested in handsome guys, especially when they’re as handsome as Lu Zijian . Tall, s.h.i.+ning, cool, gentle, but then also a bit honest and bashful… Anyway, I like everything about him, including his wheat-colored skin . I like a guy to be a little tan because it’s more manly . If all the boys were as pale as Zhong Yuan, we’d have to give a moment of silence .

Back to the basketball compet.i.tion—the School of Chemistry headed into the finals under Lu Zijian’s leaders.h.i.+p . And they were poised to go up against Zhong Yuan’s School of Business Management .

All of the fangirls at school basically split into two camps . There were those who supported the chemistry school, who were mostly fans of Lu Zijian . And then there were those who supported the business school and Zhong Yuan .

Zhong Yuan was someone who really liked being mysterious . He didn’t even go onto the court during the group matches . And even during the elimination matches, he only showed up for the last two minutes of the quarterfinals to guarantee their position .

A lot of people praised Zhong Yuan as being brilliant, going so far as calling him the reincarnation of Kobe Bryant . (sigh, Kobe’s not dead yet…) But I don’t agree with them . Lu Zijian’s the best player . Lu Zijian has no weaknesses . Lu Zijian… will win!

In the chemistry school, there existed a small group who were Zhong fanatics . And the three members that made up their backbone were my three roommates: Boss, Old Second, and Old Fourth . Those few days, we argued a lot over Lu Zijian . In the end, I pointed to my long hair, and in a show of devotion, swore, “If the business school wins, I’ll shave off all my hair!”

And then I really ended up shaving my hair off…

It was very lively the day of the finals . Squished into the crowd, I shouted along, “Lu Zijian, fighting!” until my voice went hoa.r.s.e . There was a minute left in the game, with the chemistry school in the lead by five points . Fists in the air, I could see that the business school was out of momentum .

And then they asked for a player change, and Zhong Yuan came onto the court .

He made three three-point shots .

That’s right, three of them . Three-pointers . In the last minute of the game .

I have ample reason to believe that Zhong Yuan was possessed…

In any case, the winner was decided . The management school won . The mighty Lu Zijian was defeated by a possessed Zhong Yuan .

The next day, with three girls glaring me down, I went to the salon to get my hair shaved . After the hairdresser heard my request, she looked me straight in the eyes .

That’s what happened . Because of Zhong Yuan, my idol lost the champions.h.i.+p . And because of Zhong Yuan, I ended up bald .

Do you think it’s possible for me not to hate him?

I touched my head a bit embarra.s.sed . Then I grabbed my cap from the stands and put it on .

I have pretty thick skin . I usually strut around with my bald head out in the open, without feeling at all uncomfortable . On the other hand, those three rascals who were pretending to be nice after causing all of this, felt that they’d gone overboard . They even discussed buying me a wig . I just waved away the idea and told them, “Forget it . Just treat me to a meal . I haven’t had hot pot in a while…”

But however thick my skin was, Lu Zijian was still my idol . I should try to look good in front of my idol, to be a bit reserved . That’s why I put on the cap to cover up my bald head . Then I smiled at Lu Zijian . “Senior Lu, I’m partic.i.p.ating in the hoop-shooting compet.i.tion next week . Can you give me some pointers?” I’m certain that if I had done this glance-over with a smile while I still had my beautiful, black hair, I’d have come off as a moving beauty . But right now… Oh well, forget it . I could only bother Lu Zijian a bit . If he really were to give me some pointers, I’d be able to sweep away the compet.i.tion and the reward would be in the bag…

Lu Zijian dribbled his ball, and with a smile, he nodded . I’d heard that Senior Lu was very amicable, and indeed, he lived up to his reputation . And naturally, hearts shot out of my eyes again .

That’s when a chilly voice sounded in my ear, “I really admire your confidence . ”

I turned to see Zhong Yuan looking at me . The corner of his mouth was raised as he made his snide remark, like he was watching a joke .

I glared at him and then happily ran over to Lu Zijian’s side .

Get lost, pretty boy! Get lost, possessed guy!
—

I looked at the beads of sweat on Lu Zijian’s forehead . Then I said, “Senior Lu, let me treat you to a drink!”

Lu Zijian chuckled and replied, “How could I ask you for that?”

“No, really, don’t treat me like such an outsider, Senior Lu . I have to thank you today,” I said as I headed to the drink shop near the court .

I grabbed three cans of cola, and in the corner, I crazily shook one up . Then I went to the counter to pay .

After walking out the shop, I handed one can to Lu Zijian . He smiled and thanked me .

Then I held out the special can in front of Zhong Yuan . With a bright smile, I said, “About before… I’m sorry . ”

Zhong Yuan gave a nod and accepted the cola .

I turned to open my own can of cola, and then I turned back to see how Zhong Yuan looked after being irrigated in cola .

ADVERTIs.e.m.e.nT

ADVERTIs.e.m.e.nT

I waited and waited, but before Zhong Yuan did anything, Lu Zijian asked, “Hey, Zhong Yuan, why aren’t you drinking?”

Surprised, I turned to Zhong Yuan . He couldn’t have figured it out, could he…

That’s when Zhong Yuan replied lightly, “I hurt my wrist earlier, so I can’t open it . ”

“Why didn’t you say so earlier?” Lu Zijian said . He kindly gave his own cola to Zhong Yuan and took the other can…

I wanted to stop him, but it was already too late . With the click of the tab, Lu Zijian’s head and face ended up covered in a brown liquid . A lot of cola splashed on his clothes too…

I looked down as invisible tears rolled down my face . You really couldn’t look down on carbon dioxide .

Then Lu Zijian gave his face a wipe . He complained, “So Zhong Yuan, you play these kinds of childish jokes?”

I stole a glance at Zhong Yuan, who was glaring at me . His lips curled up and there was a glimmer in his eyes . When I saw them, a chill suddenly climbed up my body, as if I’d done a bad deed and was already caught…

It’s just my imagination . Must be . I turned my head to avoid his gaze, and loudly but guiltily declared, “Yeah . Senior Zhong, you’re really something . I stopped playing these kinds of jokes when I was 10 years old . Haha, hahaha…”

Zhong Yuan didn’t say anything and instead just looked at me, somehow smiling and yet not .

His gaze scared me a bit, so I trembled as I pulled out a napkin to help Lu Zijian clean up . As I wiped away the cola, I slyly said, “Senior Lu, you don’t think Senior Zhong would try to push the blame onto me, do you?”

Lu Zijian shook his head . “Don’t say that . Zhong Yuan’s not that kind of person . ”

I didn’t dare turn to Zhong Yuan . I just kept my head down and helped Lu Zijian . A bit guiltily, I said, “Senior Lu, why don’t I help you wash your clothes?”

Lu Zijian politely shook his head . “That’s OK . ”

“Don’t you think you should be helping to wash my clothes too?” Zhong Yuan’s voice came again .

My eyes swept over his dirt-patterned jersey . I turned back to Lu Zijian and laughed foolishly . “Senior Lu, look . Senior Zhong is such a jokester . ”

Lu Zijian was puzzled by my smile . He quickly jumped in to uphold justice, “Zhong Yuan, it’s enough that you tease me . Don’t go teasing the younger students . ”

I turned to Zhong Yuan and stuck out my tongue . Seeing that gloomy expression on his face as he couldn’t speak out his grievances, I suddenly felt a lot more carefree .

When I thought back on my history of crossing swords with Zhong Yuan, I realized that this was the only time I’d had a complete victory .