Frost's Laws and By-Laws of American Society Part 28

61. Shakespeare says: "To thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any man."

62. It is a breach of etiquette to contradict any one.

63. The man who would suffer himself to speak a word against a woman, or to rail at women generally, deserves a rebuke recently given to a c.o.xcomb at an English dinner-party, who was checked in his loud abuse of the s.e.x by one of the company, who said: "I hope it is the gentleman's own mother and sisters who are referred to, and not ours."

64. If you try to make yourself appear more important than you really are, you run the risk of being considered less so.

65. Marston says: "I, me, and mine, should be bowed out of genteel circles. Egotism adorns no one."

66. It is a breach of etiquette to offer a partner in dancing an ungloved hand.

67. Spitting is as vulgar as it is disgusting.

68. "The scholar, without good breeding, is a pedant; the philosopher, a cynic; the soldier, a brute; and every man disagreeable," says Chesterfield.

69. It is a breach of etiquette to betray an implied or involuntary confidence, even if you have not been bound to secresy.

70. Bishop Beveridge says: "Never speak of a man's virtues before his face, nor of his faults behind his back."

71. "In private, watch your thoughts; in your family, watch your temper; in society, watch your tongue."

72. "To arrive at the heart of true courtesy," says a modern writer, "separate the onld English t.i.tles for the well-bred; they were the _gentle_-man and _gentle_-woman."

73. It is better to live alone than in low company. If you cannot keep good company, keep none.

74. Sterne thus defines courts.h.i.+p: "True courts.h.i.+p consists in a number of quiet, gentlemanly attentions; not so pointed as to alarm, not so vague as to be misunderstood."

75. It is a breach of etiquette to enter a room noisily, slamming the door, or stamping heavily upon the floor.

76. It is a breach of etiquette to make violent or abrupt movements.

77. It is a breach of etiquette to neglect calling upon your friends. "Visiting," says a French writer, "forms the chord which binds society together, and it is so firmly tied that were the knot severed, society would perish."

78. It is a breach of etiquette to select the route when walking with a lady, unless she has requested you to do so.

79. It is ill-bred to refuse the last piece on the plate or dish, if it is offered to you, as it implies a fear that there is no more in the pantry.

80. It is a breach of etiquette to undertake any commission for a friend and neglect to perform it. Forgetfulness is no excuse.

81. It is a breach of etiquette to answer a serious remark by a flippant one.

82. Practical joking is a breach of etiquette that cannot be too severely censured.

83. It is a breach of etiquette to read when there is any other person present. In the family circle, a member who opens a book should apologize for and explain his apparent rudeness, if obliged to study or refer to the volume.

84. It is a breach of etiquette to yawn.

85. It is a breach of etiquette to blow the nose loudly.

86. It is a breach of etiquette to suck the teeth.

87. It is a breach of etiquette to pick the teeth or clean the nails in company.

88. It is a breach of etiquette to speak much of your own performances.

89. It is a gross breach of etiquette to pa.s.s between two persons who are conversing together.

90. It is a breach of etiquette to pa.s.s _before_ anybody. If actually necessary, it must be done with an apology.

91. It is a breach of etiquette to urge wine upon a guest who has already declined to drink.

92. It is a breach of etiquette to write a letter of congratulation upon mourning paper, even if it is habitually used.

93. It is a breach of etiquette to call a new acquaintance by the Christian name, unless requested to do so.

94. If you write requesting an autograph, it is a breach of etiquette to omit to enclose a postage-stamp for the reply.

95. Ladies should avoid the use of strong perfumes. They are unpleasant to nauseating to some persons; and it is a breach of etiquette to annoy other people.

96. It is a breach of etiquette to lend a borrowed book, unless you have the special permission of the owner to do so.

97. It is a breach of etiquette, as well as a most dangerous experiment, to recommend remedies to an invalid who is under the care of a physician.

98. A lady commits a breach of etiquette that amounts to a gross impropriety by calling upon a gentleman, excepting upon business, at his place of business. Even relatives, unless in the immediate family, cannot receive calls from ladies at home.

99. Gentlemen should never stand upon the hearthrug with their backs to the fire, either in a friend's house or their own.

100. Forgetfulness is a breach of etiquette. It is impossible to be polite without cultivating a good memory. The absent or self- absorbed person who forgets the names of his next-door neighbors, recalls unlucky topics, confuses the personal relations.h.i.+ps of his personal friends, speaks of the dead as if they were still living, talks of peole in their hearing, and commits a hundred such blunders without any malevolent intention, is sure to make enemies for himself, and to wound the feelings of others. Carelessness, carried to a certain pitch, becomes unchristian. "It is not well,"

says an old proverb, "to talk of the gallows to a man whose father was hanged." Some persons are so notoriously absent or forgetful, that their friends will say of them: "We must not tell B---; he is certain to tread on somebody's corns. We must ask him some evening when we are alone."

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