The Law and Lawyers of Pickwick Part 4

"Perhaps you will take Mr. Pickwick away," said the Serjeant, "and--and--and--hear anything Mr. Pickwick may wish to communicate. We shall have a consultation, of course." With this hint that he had been interrupted quite long enough, Mr. Serjeant Snubbin, who had been gradually growing more and more abstracted, applied his gla.s.s to his eye for an instant, bowed slightly round, and was once more deeply immersed in the case before him, which arose out of an interminable law-suit originating in the act of an individual, deceased a century or so ago, who had stopped up a pathway leading from some place which n.o.body ever came from to some other place which n.o.body ever went to.

Mr. Phunky would not hear of pa.s.sing through any door until Mr.

Pickwick and his solicitor had pa.s.sed through before him, so it was some time before they got into the Square; and when they did reach it they walked up and down, and held a long conference, the result of which was that it was a very difficult matter to say how the verdict would go; that n.o.body could presume to calculate on the issue of an action; that it was very lucky they had prevented the other party from getting Serjeant Snubbin; and other topics of doubt and consolation common in such a position of affairs.

Mr. Pickwick's lawsuit was to be tried in the Court of Common Pleas, a division in which Serjeants-at-Law had the exclusive right to practise.

At this time, 1827, and indeed up till 1873, every common law judge was turned into a Serjeant, if he were not one ere he was promoted to the Bench. It was a solemn kind of ceremony. The subject of the operation was led out of the precincts of the Inns of Court; the church bell tolled as for one dead.

He was then admitted member of Serjeants' Inn; and the judge would address the Serjeants who practised before him as Brother So-and-So.

Justice Lindley was the last judge who took the degree, a degree the only outward visible sign of which is the black patch or coif which is attached to the top of the wig. I do not know what kind of counsel Serjeant Snubbin, retained by Mr. Perker for the defendant, was; but Dodson and Fogg had retained Serjeant Buzfuz for the plaintiff, and we all know that Serjeant Snubbin was no match for Serjeant Buzfuz. It has been objected by a writer in _Fraser's Magazine_, to the account of this trial, that it is full of inconsistencies. Serjeant Buzfuz' case, he says, was absurd, and that he would not have been able to browbeat any witness, and that no jury could have given a verdict on such evidence.

This criticism resembles many other criticisms of Pickwick. Had the description in Pickwick been intended as a serious picture of the proceedings in a court of justice, it would have been open to much serious dissection and examination.

But the writer just quoted did not, it seems, possess a sufficient sense of humour to enable him to see that this chapter of "Pickwick" was intended for broad fun amounting to burlesque, and nothing more; and to examine Mr. Buzfuz' proceedings by the light of the law is to strip them of their meaning.

I mentioned just now that this trial took place in 1827. At that time, as I daresay some of you are aware, the parties to the action could not be called upon to give evidence; and Lord Denman did not, I think, till 1843 remove the Arcadian fetters which bound the litigants in this fas.h.i.+on. But, ladies and gentlemen, what a fortunate thing it was for Mr. Pickwick that he could not be called upon that occasion. If Mr.

Pickwick had been called he would have been cross-examined. Let us imagine for a moment what that cross-examination would have been. Suppose merely for the sake of example that that operation had been performed by my honourable and learned friend the Attorney-General. Cannot you imagine how in the first place he would forcibly but firmly have interrogated Mr. Pickwick with regard to his conduct after the cricket match at Muggleton; how he would have asked him whether he was prepared to admit, or whether he was prepared to deny, that he was drunk upon that occasion? Could you not imagine how my honourable and learned friend, pa.s.sing on from that topic, would have alluded to what I think he would have termed the disgraceful incident when, on the 1st of September, Mr.

Pickwick was found in a wheelbarrow on the ground of Captain Boldwig, and was removed to the public pound, from which he was only extricated by the violence of his friends and servant? Pa.s.sing on from that topic, would not my honourable and learned friend have reminded him of how he had been bound over at Ipswich before Mr. Nupkins, together with his friend Mr.

Tupman, and called upon to find bail for good behaviour for six months?

Then in conclusion how my friend would have turned to that incident in the double-bedded room at Ipswich, at the Great White Horse, and how my learned friend, with that skill which he possesses, would, bit by bit, by slow degrees, have extricated from that miserable man the confession that he had been found in that double-bedded room, a spinster lady being there at the same time. Ladies and gentlemen, what would have been left of Mr.

Pickwick after that process had been gone through? His only relief would have been to write to the _Times_ newspaper, and to complain of cross- examination.

Indeed, no notice of this case, as indeed no reference to the lawyers of "Pickwick," would be regarded as in any sense complete that did not include the remarkable forensic efforts of Serjeant Buzfuz. Oft read, oft recited, oft quoted, it stands to-day, perhaps, the best-known speech ever delivered at the Bar.

We are told that the speech of Serjeant Snubbin was long and emphatic, but at any rate it was ineffective, and that learned gentleman committed a grave error in entrusting the cross-examination of Mr. Winkle to Mr.

Phunky. Now it does sometimes happen, in the course of a case, that owing to the absence of the leading counsel, which sometimes occurs, the cross-examination of a witness, perchance an important one, is left to some junior; but this excuse did not exist in this case. Serjeant Snubbin was there in Court, because we hear that he winked at Mr. Phunky to intimate to him that he had better sit down; and this, as we know, from what I have told you just now, was the first brief that Mr. Phunky had ever had. No, Serjeant Snubbin was over-matched throughout by Serjeant Buzfuz, and Mr. Phunky was no match even for the scheming junior on the other side, and Perker was no match for Dodson and Fogg. The law, as we are told in one of George Eliot's books, is a kind of c.o.c.k-fight, in which it is the business of injured honesty to get a game bird with the best pluck and the strongest spurs; and I venture to think that the combined pluck of Buzfuz and Skimpin by far outweighed any of that commodity possessed by Snubbin and Phunky. No wonder Mr. Pickwick lost his case; but his case never recovered the effect of the speech which I now propose to read to you.

Serjeant Buzfuz began by saying that never, in the whole course of his professional experience--never, from the very first moment of his applying himself to the study and practice of the law--had he approached a case with feelings of such deep emotion, or with such a heavy sense of the responsibility imposed upon him--a responsibility, he would say, which he could never have supported, were he not buoyed up and sustained by a conviction so strong, that it amounted to positive certainty that the cause of truth and justice, or, in other words, the cause of his much injured and most oppressed client, must prevail with the high-minded and intelligent dozen of men whom he now saw in that box before him.

Counsel usually begin in this way, because it puts the jury on the very best terms with themselves, and makes them think what sharp fellows they must be. A visible effect was produced immediately; several jurymen beginning to take voluminous notes with the utmost eagerness.

"You have heard from my learned friend, gentlemen," continued Serjeant Buzfuz--well knowing that, from the learned friend alluded to, the gentlemen of the jury had heard just nothing at all--"you have heard from my learned friend, gentlemen, that this is an action for breach of promise of marriage, in which the damages are laid at 1,500 pounds.

But you have not heard from my learned friend, inasmuch as it did not come within my learned friend's province to tell you, what are the facts and circ.u.mstances of the case. Those facts and circ.u.mstances, gentlemen, you shall hear detailed by me, and proved by the unimpeachable female whom I will place in that box before you."

Here Mr. Serjeant Buzfuz, with a tremendous emphasis on the word "box," smote his table with a mighty sound, and glanced at Dodson and Fogg, who nodded admiration to the Serjeant, and indignant defiance of the defendant.

"The plaintiff, gentlemen," continued Serjeant Buzfuz, in a soft and melancholy voice, "the plaintiff is a widow; yes, gentlemen, a widow.

The late Mr. Bardell, after enjoying, for many years, the esteem and confidence of his sovereign, as one of the guardians of his royal revenues, glided almost imperceptibly from the world, to seek elsewhere for that repose and peace which a custom house can never afford."

At this pathetic description of the decease of Mr. Bardell, who had been knocked on the head with a quart pot in a public-house cellar, the learned Serjeant's voice faltered, and he proceeded with emotion,--

"Some time before his death he had stamped his likeness upon a little boy. With this little boy, the only pledge of her departed exciseman, Mrs. Bardell shrunk from the world, and courted the retirement and tranquillity of Goswell Street; and here she placed in her front parlour-window a written placard, bearing this inscription--'Apartments furnished for a single gentleman. Inquire within.'" Here Serjeant Buzfuz paused, while several gentlemen of the jury took a note of the doc.u.ment.

"There is no date to that, is there?" inquired a juror.

"There is no date, gentlemen," replied Serjeant Buzfuz; "but I am instructed to say that it was put in the plaintiff's parlour-window just this time three years. I entreat the attention of the jury to the wording of this doc.u.ment. 'Apartments furnished for a single gentleman!' Mrs. Bardell's opinions of the opposite s.e.x, gentlemen, were derived from a long contemplation of the inestimable qualities of her lost husband. She had no fear, she had no distrust, she had no suspicion, all was confidence and reliance. 'Mr. Bardell,' said the widow, 'Mr. Bardell was a man of honour, Mr. Bardell was a man of his word, Mr. Bardell was no deceiver, Mr. Bardell was once a single gentleman himself; _to_ single gentlemen I look for protection, for a.s.sistance, for comfort, and for consolation; _in_ single gentlemen I shall perpetually see something to remind me of what Mr. Bardell was when he first won my young and untried affections: to a single gentleman, then, shall my lodgings be let.' Actuated by this beautiful and touching impulse (among the best impulses of our imperfect nature, gentlemen) the lonely and desolate widow dried her tears, furnished her first floor, caught the innocent boy to her maternal bosom, and put the bill up in her parlour-window. Did it remain there long? No. The serpent was on the watch, the train was laid, the mine was preparing, the sapper and miner was at work. Before the bill had been in the parlour-window three days--three days, gentlemen--a Being, erect upon two legs, and bearing all the outward semblance of a man, and not of a monster, knocked at the door of Mrs.

Bardell's house. He inquired within--he took the lodgings; and on the very next day he entered into possession of them. The man was Pickwick--Pickwick, the defendant."

Serjeant Buzfuz, who had proceeded with such volubility that his face was perfectly crimson, here paused for breath. The silence awoke Mr.

Justice Stareleigh, who immediately wrote down something with a pen without any ink in it, and looked unusually profound, to impress the jury with the belief that he always thought most deeply with his eyes shut. Serjeant Buzfuz proceeded.

"Of this man Pickwick I will say little; the subject presents but few attractions; and I, gentlemen, am not the man, nor are you, gentlemen, the men, to delight in the contemplation of revolting heartlessness and of systematic villainy."

Here Mr. Pickwick, who had been writhing in silence for some time, gave a violent start, as if some vague idea of a.s.saulting Serjeant Buzfuz, in the august presence of justice and law, suggested itself to his mind. An admonitory gesture from Perker restrained him, and he listened to the learned gentleman's continuation with a look of indignation, which contrasted forcibly with the admiring faces of Mrs.

Cluppins and Mrs. Sanders.

"I say systematic villainy, gentlemen," said Serjeant Buzfuz, looking through Mr. Pickwick, and talking _at_ him; "and when I say systematic villainy, let me tell the defendant Pickwick, if he be in Court--as I am informed he is--that it would have been more decent in him, more becoming, in better judgment, and in better taste, if he had stopped away. Let me tell him, gentlemen, that any gestures of dissent or disapprobation in which he may indulge in this Court will not go down with you; that you will know how to value and how to appreciate them; and let me tell him further, as my lord will tell you, gentlemen, that a counsel, in the discharge of his duty to his client, is neither to be intimidated, nor bullied, nor put down; and that any attempt to do either the one or the other, or the first, or the last, will recoil on the head of the attempter, be he plaintiff or be he defendant, be his name Pickwick, or Noakes, or Stoakes, or Stiles, or Brown, or Thompson."

This little divergence from the subject in hand had, of course, the intended effect of turning all eyes to Mr. Pickwick. Serjeant Buzfuz, having partially recovered from the state of moral elevation into which he had lashed himself, resumed,--

"I shall show you, gentlemen, that for two years Pickwick continued to reside constantly, and without interruption or intermission, at Mrs.

Bardell's house. I shall show you that Mrs. Bardell, during the whole of that time, waited on him, attended to his comforts, cooked his meals, looked out his linen for the washerwoman when it went abroad, darned, aired, and prepared it for wear, and, in short, enjoyed his fullest trust and confidence. I shall show you that, on many occasions, he gave halfpence, and on some occasions even sixpences, to her little boy; and I shall prove to you, by a witness whose testimony it will be impossible for my learned friend to weaken or controvert, that on one occasion he patted the boy on the head, and, after inquiring whether he had won any _alley tors_ or _commoneys_ lately (both of which I understand to be a particular species of marbles much prized by the youth of this town), made use of this remarkable expression: 'How should you like to have another father?' I shall prove to you, gentlemen, that about a year ago Pickwick suddenly began to absent himself from home during long intervals, as with the intention of gradually breaking off from my client; but I shall show you also that his resolution was not at that time sufficiently strong, or that his better feelings conquered, if better feelings he has, or that the charms and accomplishments of my client prevailed against his unmanly intentions; by proving to you that on one occasion, when he returned from the country, he distinctly and in terms offered her marriage; previously, however, taking special care that there should be no witnesses to their solemn contract; and I am in a situation to prove to you, on the testimony of three of his own friends--most unwilling witnesses, gentlemen--most unwilling witnesses--that on that morning he was discovered by them holding the plaintiff in his arms, and soothing her agitation by his caresses and endearment."

A visible impression was produced upon the auditors by this part of the learned Serjeant's address. Drawing forth two very small sc.r.a.ps of paper, he proceeded,--

"And now, gentlemen, but one word more. Two letters have pa.s.sed between these parties, letters which are admitted to be in the handwriting of the defendant, and which speak volumes indeed. These letters, too, bespeak the character of the man. They are not open, fervent, eloquent epistles, breathing nothing but the language of affectionate attachment. They are covert, sly, underhanded communications; but, fortunately, far more conclusive than if couched in the most glowing language and the most poetic imagery--letters that must be viewed with a cautious and suspicious eye--letters that were evidently intended at the time, by Pickwick, to mislead and delude any third parties into whose hands they might fall. Let me read the first:--'Garraway's, twelve o'clock. Dear Mrs. B.--Chops and Tomato sauce; Yours, PICKWICK.' Gentlemen, what does this mean? Chops and Tomato sauce. Yours, PICKWICK! Chops! Gracious heavens! and Tomato sauce! Gentlemen, is the happiness of a sensitive and confiding female to be trifled away by such shallow artifices as these? The next has no date whatever, which is in itself suspicious. 'Dear Mrs.

B., I shall not be at home till to-morrow. Slow coach.' And then follows this very remarkable expression: 'Don't trouble yourself about the warming-pan.' The warming-pan! Why, gentlemen, who _does_ trouble himself about a warming-pan? When was the peace of mind of man or woman broken or disturbed by a warming-pan, which is in itself a harmless, a useful, and I will add, gentlemen, a comfortable article of domestic furniture? Why is Mrs. Bardell so earnestly entreated not to agitate herself about this warming-pan, unless (as is no doubt the case) it is a mere cover for hidden fire--a mere subst.i.tute for some endearing word or promise, agreeably to a preconcerted system of correspondence, artfully contrived by Pickwick with a view to his contemplated desertion, and which I am not in a condition to explain!

And what does this allusion to the slow coach mean? For aught I know, it may be a reference to Pickwick himself, who has most unquestionably been a criminally slow coach during the whole of this transaction, but whose speed will now be very unexpectedly accelerated, and whose wheels, gentlemen, as he will find to his cost, will very soon be greased by you!"

Mr. Serjeant Buzfuz paused in this place to see whether the jury smiled at his joke; but as n.o.body took it but the greengrocer, whose sensitiveness on the subject was very probably occasioned by his having subjected a chaise cart to the process in question on that identical morning, the learned Serjeant considered it advisable to undergo a slight relapse into the dismals before he concluded.

"But enough of this, gentlemen," said Mr. Serjeant Buzfuz, "it is difficult to smile with an aching heart; it is ill jesting when our deepest sympathies are awakened. My client's hopes and prospects are ruined, and it is no figure of speech to say that her occupation is gone indeed. The bill is down--but there is no tenant. Eligible single gentlemen pa.s.s and repa.s.s--but there is no invitation for them to inquire within or without. All is gloom and silence in the house; even the voice of the child is hushed--his infant sports are disregarded when his mother weeps; his 'alley tors' and his 'commoneys' are alike neglected; he forgets the long familiar cry of 'knuckle down,' and at tip-cheese, or odd or even, his hand is out.

But Pickwick, gentlemen, Pickwick, the ruthless destroyer of this domestic oasis in the desert of Goswell Street--Pickwick, who has choked up the well and thrown ashes on the sward--Pickwick, who comes before you to-day with his heartless tomato sauce and warming-pans--Pickwick still rears his head with unblus.h.i.+ng effrontery, and gazes without a sigh on the ruin he has made. Damages, gentlemen--heavy damages--is the only punishment with which you can visit him; the only recompense you can award to my client. And for those damages she now appeals to an enlightened, a high-minded, a right-feeling, a conscientious, a dispa.s.sionate, a sympathising, a contemplative jury of her civilised countrymen."

With this beautiful peroration, Mr. Serjeant Buzfuz sat down, and Mr.

Justice Stareleigh woke up.

Of the judge of this famous case we hear but little. He went to sleep, and he woke up again, and he tried to look as though he hadn't been asleep; in fact, he behaved very much as judges do.

Mr. Justice Stareleigh summed up in the old-established and most approved form. He read as much of his notes to the jury as he could decipher on so short a notice, and made running comments on the evidence as he went along. If Mrs. Bardell were right, it was perfectly clear that Mr. Pickwick was wrong; and if they thought the evidence of Mrs. Cluppins worthy of credence they would believe it, and, if they didn't, why they wouldn't. If they were satisfied that a breach of promise of marriage had been committed, they would find for the plaintiff, with such damages as they thought proper; and if, on the other hand, it appeared to them that no promise of marriage had ever been given, they would find for the defendant, with no damages at all.

So, ladies and gentlemen, in conclusion, let me point out to you how all these types and instances of lawyers and lawyer life have received fair and impartial consideration from Charles d.i.c.kens, for which I, at any rate, am grateful. The public, however, to my mind, owe a deeper debt of grat.i.tude to the man who, by his wit, his courage, and his industry, has brought about reforms in our legal administration for which all litigants and honourable pract.i.tioners should alike be grateful.

Sir CHARLES RUSSELL: Ladies and gentlemen,--We have spent, I am sure you will all think, a most enjoyable, as well as a most instructive evening, thanks to the vivid picture of the great novelist of our generation put before us by my friend Mr. Lockwood, who has pointed out with force and effect the serious obligation we are under for many reforms which exist in our day through the influence, sometimes serious, sometimes comic, which the great Charles d.i.c.kens gave to the world. It is an interesting occasion, and not the less interesting when you are informed that in this room to-night is the son of Mr. Charles d.i.c.kens--Mr. Henry Fielding d.i.c.kens--referred to by my friend Mr. Lockwood. Mr. Henry d.i.c.kens has not followed in his father's footsteps; he has chosen for himself the profession of the bar; and in that profession he has gained for himself a high and honourable name. At this hour I cannot permit myself to say more than to ask you to join in the vote of thanks which I now move to my friend Mr. Lockwood for the very admirable lecture which he has just given.

Vote of thanks seconded by MR. HILLIARD.

Mr. HENRY FIELDING d.i.c.kENS: Sir Charles Russell, ladies and gentlemen,--I a.s.sure you that when I came into this room to-night I had no more idea that I was to make any observations than--the man in the moon. I came here with the idea of listening to my old friend Mr. Frank Lockwood, with the sure and certain knowledge that I should derive a great deal of amus.e.m.e.nt and interest from his lecture. In that I need hardly say I have not been disappointed; but I a.s.sure you, ladies and gentlemen, that I have not only been interested, I have been touched. I am not alluding to the very graceful allusions and far too flattering observation upon myself given by the Attorney-General, but I am alluding to the spirit pervading this hall this evening--a spirit which proves to me that the memory of my father is still green among you all. To us who have the honour of bearing his name, that memory, I need hardly tell you, is still sacred; and to find that among his fellow-countrymen, though twenty-three years have pa.s.sed since his death, there is still that feeling of affection felt for him that was felt for him in his lifetime, is most gratifying to us all. I a.s.sure you with all the warmth in my heart, and in the name of my sister and other members of the family, that I thank you most sincerely, not only for your generous reception of myself, but for the feeling you have demonstrated that you bear for my dear father.

Mr. FRANK LOCKWOOD: Sir Charles Russell, ladies and gentlemen,--I shall only detain you to say that I thank you for your great kindness to me to- night; it has been a pleasure to me to come. I was to have come, if I remember rightly, in June or July, 1892; I could not come because there was a General Election. I am very glad that I was not prevented from coming to-night by a--General Election.

THE END.