The Funny Philosophers Part 60

Business was then rapidly transacted in the El Dorado of the West, where, at that period, immense fortunes were frequently made and lost in a month. In a few hours the three friends were the owners of the sand-hill, and had their t.i.tles secured by deeds duly executed.

On the following morning they hunted up Hercules and his companions, who were feasting on wild geese and quails at a tent in Montgomery Street, and embarked in a boat for Stockton, from which point they intended to proceed across the country to the mines on the Moquelumne River. In the afternoon of the same day they were entering the mouth of the San Joaquin when a schooner ran by them.

"What place is this?" shouted Toney.

"New York," answered a man on the schooner.

"Not much like New York," said the Professor.

"What place is it?" asked Tom Seddon.

"New York!" shouted the man, with vehemence.

"He knows," said Toney.

"Let us go ash.o.r.e and dine at the Astor House," said the Professor.

They went on sh.o.r.e, but were unable to find the hotel designated, and made a meal on elk meat, in a tent kept by a one-eyed Hibernian; after which they again proceeded up the river until about the middle of the night, when they lashed to the tulas on the bank, and lay in the bottom of the boat, sometimes snoring and at other times fighting the mosquitoes.

In the morning they hoisted sail, and in so doing Moses fell over the bow of the boat and was hauled in at the stern. After Moses had thus performed his ablutions, they sailed on until about ten o'clock, when Tom Seddon exclaimed, "This river is as crooked as the track of a snake!

What mountain is that? It sometimes seems on the larboard, and sometimes on the starboard."

"That is Mount Diablo, I suppose, from the description I have had of it," said the Professor.

"The Devil's Mountain," said Tom.

"In plain English, the Devil's Mountain," said the Professor.

"I never was so hungry; I could eat a bear," said Tom.

"Better eat a bear than that a bear should eat you," said the Professor.

"I will starve before we get to Stockton," said Tom. "Let us go on sh.o.r.e and shoot some game."

"Agreed!" said Toney. And they ran in along sh.o.r.e, and, fastening their boat to the bough of a tree, landed and proceeded through the tulas in the direction of Mount Diablo. When they had gone about a mile they reached an open s.p.a.ce surrounded with thickets. Here they halted, and were gazing around in search of game, when Tom Seddon suddenly exclaimed, "Look! look!"

About two hundred paces from where they stood a man rushed out from the thicket, and behind him came forth a huge and ferocious monster apparently in pursuit. The hideous beast ran after the man, and striking him with its nose under the tail of his coat hurled him headforemost about twenty feet. The man fell on his hands and knees, and the monster stood still and gazed at him intently.

"The devil!" exclaimed Tom Seddon.

"From Mount Diablo," said the Professor.

"It is a grizzly bear," said Toney.

"Gracious!" exclaimed Moses.

"That fellow had better run," said Tom.

"He has taken your advice," said the Professor.

"The bear is after him again," said Toney.

"Great thunder! I would as soon be shot out of a cannon!" shouted Tom Seddon, as the huge creature thrust its nose under the man's coat and propelled him forward with prodigious velocity. The man again fell on his hands and knees, and the beast stood still and regarded him with a steadfast look.

"The bear is waiting for him to get up," said Tom.

"That's right," said the Professor. "Never strike a man when he is down."

"He is on his feet again," said Tom, as the man sprang up and commenced running.

"And the bear is at him again," said Toney, as the eccentric monster rushed at the man and hurled him headlong with tremendous force.

"Jupiter Tonans!" exclaimed Tom. "That was a settler."

"He is stunned," said Toney, as the man lay motionless with his face on the ground. The bear stood still and looked intently at the prostrate form. The man did not move. After gazing at him for several moments, the bear walked up and smelled him from head to foot.

"Is he going to eat him?" cried Tom.

"I do not believe that he is," said the Professor.

"Look there! Did you ever see the like?" cried Tom, as the bear commenced plowing up the earth with its nose and piling it on the man's body.

"He is burying him," said Toney.

"That bear has good principles in his composition," said the Professor.

"He buries his dead."

The bear continued to pile the earth over the man until he had raised quite a mound, when he turned round, and, at a shuffling gait, went off in the direction of Mount Diablo, and was soon hidden in the thicket.

Toney and his friends now ran to the spot where the man was buried. The end of his coat was visible. Toney and Tom tugged at the tail of the coat, while the Professor aided in the disinterment by kicking off the earth with his feet.

"By the powers of mud!" was uttered in a hoa.r.s.e voice, and the man sprang erect.

"Captain Bragg!" exclaimed Toney, in astonishment.

"Great thunder!" cried Tom.

The astonishment of Bragg was equal to that of Toney and Tom. He was covered with dirt, and swore vehemently "by the powers of mud." He eventually became more composed, and, while walking to the boat, accounted for the condition in which he was found. In coming down the river he had quarreled with the captain of the vessel, and challenged him to single combat. The captain had rudely refused to accept the challenge, and put Bragg on sh.o.r.e, where, in wandering about, he had encountered the bear.

"Look!--look!--what's that?" cried Moses, as an agile creature with very long ears sprang up before them.

"It is a young donkey," said Toney.

Tom fired his gun and the animal fell dead.

"In this country it is called a jacka.s.s rabbit," said Bragg, as Tom shouldered his game and carried it to the boat.

A fire was kindled, and in a short time they were feasting on the broiled flesh of the rabbit. During the meal Botts and Bragg regarded each other with looks of savage ferocity, but no words were exchanged between them. Toney's mind was relieved from anxiety when Bragg pointed to a schooner coming down the river, and said,--