Collide Book 2 - Page 63

Gavin swallowed, his heart pummeling his ribcage as fast as the one that could potentially be his child. My child… He felt Emily squeeze his hand as he started to feel sweat forming above his brows. Staring at the screen, he nearly lost his breath. He watched the tiny, unborn life twitch and jerk inside its little coc.o.o.n. h.e.l.l, it was so f.u.c.king small, he swore if Emily sneezed, she would hurt it. G.o.d, not that the last couple of weeks since they’d returned from California wasn’t spent praying this child was his, but here and now, he needed to believe it was. Flashes of teaching a little blue-eyed boy how to play baseball in the backyard of a home he’d have built dowsed his thoughts. Visions of a little girl in a pink tutu, singing and dancing for him and Emily, stoked his need even further.

Gavin pulled his chair closer, released Emily’s hand, and brushed his fingers through her hair. Gazing into her eyes, he swallowed again. “Can you… feel it moving inside of you?”

Emily shook her head, her voice a whisper. “No.”

“She’s too early to feel any movement. That happens somewhere around the fifteen week mark.” After some more prodding, b.u.t.ton twirling, and whooshes, the doctor shut off the machine. He sauntered over to the wall, flipping on the light. He plucked a cardboard wheel from the counter and looked at it a moment. “Based on the size of the baby, you’re approximately ten weeks along. Conception took place within the last week of October. My estimated due date is July twenty-first. My office isn’t equipped with the latest technology, so I’ll have the receptionist schedule a transv.a.g.i.n.al ultrasound for you. I may be close to retirement and a little outdated, but I’m pretty sure I’m correct. Been doing this long before you two were a twinkle in your parents’ eyes. “ He handed Emily a paper towel, gesturing to her stomach. “Use that to wipe off the gel and feel free to use the restroom. When you’re finished, you can meet me in my office. Second door on your left when you exit the room. We’ll go over the pros and cons of the amnio.”

As the doctor walked out, Emily wiped the gel from her stomach. The only words she could remotely concentrate on were when conception had taken place. The last week of October. She’d only been with Gavin a handful of times during that week, but it still put him in the running. Even if by a few days, that’s all that mattered to Emily. Sighing, she slipped from the table and quickly used the restroom. After relieving herself, she walked out and caught Gavin’s eyes. She could tell he was stuck deep in his own thoughts, and h.e.l.l if it didn’t cut through her heart.

“Are you okay?” she whispered, walking over to him as she b.u.t.toned jeans that were starting to become a little snug.

Standing, he snaked his arms around her waist. “I am. Are you?”

She nodded, snuggling against his chest. However, she wasn’t okay. She was far from it. The pain Gavin was going through was killing her. Pulling in his smell and drowning in the sound of his heart, she fought back tears.

Gavin kissed the top of her head. “I didn’t know you looked up that amnio… or whatever it’s called.”

“Yeah. I did the other day while I was at work.”

“You mentioned risks.” He reached for her purse and handed it to her. “What kind of risks are there, and how do they perform the test?”

Sliding the strap over her shoulder, she paused a moment, remembering what the procedure entailed. An involuntary s.h.i.+ver worked through her. “They would stick a needle through my stomach and…”

With shock crossing his face, he cut her off. “A needle? In your stomach?”

“Yes.”

Gavin blew out a puff of air. “Emily, I’d rather a needle not go near your stomach.”

“Umm, Gavin, I’d rather a needle not go through my stomach either. I mean, it can cause an infection.”

Gavin’s eyes went wide. “What type of infection?”

Emily smiled at his confusion and worry. “Amniotic. It’s the sack of liquid the baby’s in. It can become… infected.”

“Then what happens?” he asked, swiping his hand through his hair, his tone showing his worry was mounting.

Emily pulled in a slow breath. “It can lead to a miscarriage.”

Gavin swallowed, his words slow. “Are you serious?” Emily nodded. “No way. You’re not getting it done.” Intertwining their fingers, he started for the door. “Jesus, Emily, why would you even think about putting the baby or yourself through that?”

They rounded the corner, heading in the opposite direction of the doctor’s office. Emily came to a stop. “I looked it up because I can see you’re suffering. That’s the only test I found that could prove who the father is now.” Looking away, her voice trailed. “It’s enough you took me back. Now you have to deal with this?”

Gavin cupped her face, bringing her gaze back to his. “It’s enough I took you back?” Emily nodded, her eyes gla.s.sing over. With his thumbs, he gently swiped away her tears. “Despite all the pain and hurt I went through losing you for just that little amount of time, Emily, I wouldn’t change a thing. Not a thing. I’d take you back a million times over. Pain and all.” He brushed his lips over hers, his voice soft. “We’re dealing with this. Not just me. Us. I’d rather not know than have you put yourself or the baby in any kind of danger. I’d never be able to live with myself if anything happened to either of you because you think I need to know.”

Leaning into his intoxicating warmth, Emily rested her head against his chest. “Are you sure?”