Mr. Pim Passes By Part 18

OLIVIA. Thank you, George, I will think it over.

GEORGE (_laughing_). Silly girl. (_Pats her on the shoulder and crosses to_ R.) Well, then, to-morrow morning. No wedding cake, I'm afraid, Olivia. (_He laughs again and moves up centre_.) But we'll go and have a good lunch somewhere.

OLIVIA. I will think it over, George.

GEORGE (_good-humouredly and coming down to back of settee to her_ R.).

Well, give me a kiss while you're thinking.

OLIVIA. I'm afraid you mustn't kiss me until we are actually engaged.

GEORGE (_laughing uneasily, and sitting and leaning over on table_ L.C.

_towards_ OLIVIA). Oh, we needn't take it as seriously as all that.

OLIVIA. But a woman must take a proposal seriously.

GEORGE (_a little alarmed at last_). What do you mean?

OLIVIA. Well, what I mean is that the whole question--(_with a sly look at_ GEORGE)--as I heard somebody say once, demands much more anxious thought than either of us has given it. These hasty marriages----

GEORGE (_rising and crossing at back of_ OLIVIA _round settee and to_ L.

_of_ OLIVIA). Hasty!

OLIVIA. Well, you've only just proposed to me, and you want me to marry you to-morrow.

GEORGE. Now you're talking perfect nonsense, Olivia. You know quite well that our case is utterly different from--well--from any other.

OLIVIA. All the same, one must ask oneself questions. With a young girl like--well, with a young girl--love may well seem to be all that matters.

But with a woman of my age it is different. I have to ask myself whether you can afford to support a wife.

GEORGE. You know perfectly well that I can afford to support a wife as my wife should be supported.

OLIVIA. Oh, I am glad. Then your income--you are not really worried about that at all?

GEORGE (_stiffly_). You know perfectly well what my income is. I see no reason for anxiety, in the future.

OLIVIA. Ah, very well, then we needn't think about it any more.

GEORGE. You know I can't make out what you're up to. (_Sits to her_ L.

_on settee_.) Don't you want to get married--to--er--legalize this extraordinary situation in which we are placed?

OLIVIA. I must consider the whole question very carefully. I can't just jump at the very first offer I have had since my husband died. (_Rising and crossing to centre_.)

GEORGE. Oh, so I'm under consideration, eh?

OLIVIA (_moving up_ R.C.). Every suitor is.

GEORGE. Oh, very well, go on! Go on!

OLIVIA. Well then, there's your niece. You have a niece living with you.

Of course Dinah is a delightful girl, but one doesn't like marrying into a household where there's another grown-up woman. But perhaps she will be getting married herself soon.

GEORGE. I see no prospect of it.

OLIVIA. It would make it so much easier, George, if she did.

GEORGE (_rising_). Is this a threat, Olivia? (_Crossing up to_ OLIVIA.) Are you telling me that if I do not allow young Strange to marry Dinah, you will not marry me?

OLIVIA. A threat? Oh, no, George. But I was just wondering if you love me as much as Brian loves Dinah. You do love me?

GEORGE (_from his heart_). Of course I do, old girl.

OLIVIA. You're sure it's not just my pretty face that attracts you. Love which is based upon mere outward appearances cannot result in lasting happiness--as one of our thinkers has observed. (_Moving down to settee_ R.)

GEORGE. Why should you doubt my love? You can't pretend that we haven't been happy together. (OLIVIA _sits on settee_ R.) I've--(_taking a chair from_ L. _of table_ R.C. _brings it down to_ L. _of_ OLIVIA) I've been a good pal to you, eh? We--we suit each other, old girl.

OLIVIA. Do we?

GEORGE (_sitting_). Well, of course we do.

OLIVIA. I wonder. When two people of our age think of getting married, one wants to be quite sure that there is real community of ideas between them. Supposing that after we have been married some years we found ourselves getting estranged from each other upon such questions as Dinah's future, or the comparatively trivial matter like the right colour for a curtain, or the advice to be given to a friend who had innocently contracted a bigamous marriage. Think how bitterly we should regret our hasty plunge into a matrimony which was no true partners.h.i.+p, whether of tastes or ideas or even of consciences. (_With a sigh_.) Ah me!

GEORGE (_turning to her quickly_). Unfortunately for your argument, Olivia, I can answer you out of your own mouth. You seem to have-- (_laughing_)--forgotten what you said this morning in the case of--er-- young Strange.

OLIVIA (_with exaggerated reproach_). Oh, but is it quite fair, George, to drag up _what was said this morning_?

GEORGE (_enjoying his apparent success_). Ha ha! You've brought it on yourself.

OLIVIA. I?... Well, and what did I say this morning?

GEORGE. You said that it was quite enough that Strange was n gentleman and in love with Dinah for me to let them marry each other.

OLIVIA. Oh! But is that enough, George?

GEORGE (_triumphantly_). Well, you said so.

OLIVIA (_meekly_). Well, George, if you think so too, I'm quite willing to risk it.

GEORGE (_kindly, rising and putting back chair up_ R.C.). Ha ha, my dear!

You see!

OLIVIA. Then you _do_ think it's enough?

GEORGE. I--er--yes, yes, I--I think so.

OLIVIA (_rising and going to him and putting her hands on his shoulders_). My darling one! How jolly! Then we can have a double wedding.

GEORGE (_astonished_). A double one!