The Definite Object Part 60

BY ORDER.

"Now what," said Mrs. Trapes, refolding the circular very reverently and shutting it into the testament, "jest what d'ye think o' that?"

"Quite a--er--remarkable doc.u.ment, Mrs. Trapes!"

"Remarkable?" snorted Mrs. Trapes.

"Yes," said Ravenslee, beginning to fill his pipe, "extraordinary, most extraordinary--er--very much so--"

"Extraordinary? Mr. Geoffrey, is that all you got t' say about it?" And Mrs. Trapes sniffed loudly.

"Well, what more should I say?"

"Why, ain't it th' wonder o' th' whole round world? Ain't it th'

merrycle of all time?"

"Certainly! Not a doubt of it!" he agreed. "By the way, what do you happen to have for supper? You see I've been--"

"Supper?"

"I'm quite hungry--I'm always hungry lately and--"

"Hungry!" e.j.a.c.u.l.a.t.ed Mrs. Trapes, rolling her eyes, "here I tell him of wonders an' omens beyond pore huming understanding an'--he's hungry!

Lord, ain't that jest like a man! A man's soul, if a man has a soul, lays in his stummick. Hungry! But you shall be fed--prompt, Mr.

Geoffrey. How'll b'iled salmon an' peas soot?"

"Splendidly! And I think--"

"'On and after,'" said Mrs. Trapes, slowly and dreamily, "'on and after the above date, all tenants soever residin'--I've learned it by heart, Mr. Geoffrey. Then it goes on to say, 'within the tennyment house known as Mulligan's are warned'--hum! I wonder why 'warned'?--'are warned that all rents will be re-dooced by fifty per cent!' Fifty per cent!" she repeated in a dreamy rapture, "which is jest half, y' see. An', Mr.

Geoffrey, that's jest what's got me plumb scared--it's all so unnacheral. I've heard o' rents bein' rose--constant, but who ever heard of 'em bein' took down before? Well, well! My land! Well, well!"

With which remark Mrs. Trapes went about her household duties, leaving Ravenslee to lounge and smoke and dream blissfully of Hermione.

"Y' see," said Mrs. Trapes, wandering in with a plate, "it'll make things s' much easier for all of us; we shall begin t' feel almost rich--some of us. 'Are warned that all rents will be re-dooced by fifty per cent.' Well, well!" and she wandered out again.

But presently she was back once more, this time with the tablecloth, which she proceeded to spread, though still lost in dreamy abstraction.

"At first I couldn't an' I wouldn't believe it, Mr. Geoffrey--no, sir!"

she continued in the same rapt voice. "But every one's got a notice same as mine, so I guess it must be true--don't ye think?"

"Not a doubt of it!" answered Ravenslee.

"But th' burnin' question as I asks myself is--who? It's signed 'By Order', y' see, well--whose? One sure thing, it ain't Mulligan."

"But he owns the place, doesn't he?"

"He did, Mr. Geoffrey, an' that's what worries me--continual. What I demands is--who now?"

"Echo, Mrs. Trapes, methinks doth answer 'Who?' By the way, it was--er--salmon and green peas I think you--"

"My land, that bit o' salmon'll bile itself t' rags!" and incontinent she vanished.

However, in due time Ravenslee sat down to as tasty a supper as might be and did ample justice to it, while Mrs. Trapes once more read aloud for his edification from the wondrous circular, and was again propounding the vexed and burning question of "who" when she was interrupted by a knocking without, and going to the door, presently returned with little Mrs. Bowker, in whose tired eyes shone an unusual light, and whose faded voice held a strange note of gladness.

"Good evenin', Mr. Geoffrey!" said she, bobbing him a curtsey as he rose to greet her, "my Hazel sends you her love an' a kiss for them last candies--an' thank ye for all th' medicine--but oh, Mr. Geoffrey, an'

you, Ann Trapes, you'll never guess what's brought me. I've come t' wish ye good-by, we're--oh, Ann, we're goin' at last!"

"Goin'!" exclaimed Mrs. Trapes, clutching at her elbows, "y' never mean as you're leavin' Mulligan's now the rent's been took down--re-dooced fifty per cent.--by order?"

"That's just what I'm tellin' ye--oh, Ann, ain't it just--heavenly!"

"Heavenly!" repeated Mrs. Trapes, and sank into a chair.

"Yes, heavenly t' see th' trees an' flowers again--t' live among them, Ann."

"Samanthy Bowker--what do you mean?"

"Why, Ann, my Tom's had a gardener's job offered him at a gentleman's mansion in the country. Tom went after it t'day--an' got it. Fifteen dollars a week an' a cottage--free, Ann! Hazel's just crazy with joy--an' so'm I!"

Mrs. Trapes fanned herself feebly with her ap.r.o.n.

"All I can say is," said she faintly, "if the world don't come to an end soon--I shall. A gardener's job! A cottage in th' country! Why, that's what you've been hungerin' for, you an' Bowker, ever since I've known ye. And to-day--it's come! An' to-day the rent's re-dooced itself fifty per cent. by order--oh, dear land o' my fathers! When d' ye go?"

"T'morrow mornin', Ann. Hazel'll sure grow a strong, well girl in th'

country--doctor said so last week--you heard him, Mr. Geoffrey, didn't you?"

"I did, Mrs. Bowker."

"And my Tom's that excited he couldn't eat no supper--oh, an' have ye seen in t'night's paper, Ann, about Mulligan's?"

"No--what now?" enquired Mrs. Trapes, as though on the verge of collapsing.

"Well, read that--right there!" and unfolding an evening paper, Mrs.

Bowker pointed to a paragraph tucked away into a corner, and, drawing a deep breath, Mrs. Trapes read aloud as follows:

It is understood that Geoffrey Ravenslee, the well-known sportsman and millionaire, winner of last year's International Automobile race and holder of the world's long-distance speed record, has lately paid a record price in a real estate deal. A certain tenement building off Tenth Avenue has been purchased by him, the cost of which, it is rumoured, was fabulous.

"Fab'lous!" repeated Mrs. Trapes, and sniffed. "Well, I never had no use fer millionaires, anyway--they're generally fools or rogues--this one's a fool sure--any one is as would give much fer a place like Mulligan's--an' yet, come t' think of it again--'are warned as all rents will be re-dooced fifty per cent. by order'--yes, come t' think of it again, what I say is--G.o.d bless this millionaire, an' whatever he is, Ann Angelina Trapes is sure goin' t' mention him before th' Throne this night."

CHAPTER XXVIII

WHICH SHOULD HAVE RELATED DETAILS OF A WEDDING

"It's all very, very wonderful, Ann, dear! But then--everything is so wonderful--just lately!"