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As I continue to move around, admiring him at new angles, my excitement levels ramp up to vibrating. I can't stop smiling looking down at my wee swallow with his wings flapping open and soaring through the air - figuratively speaking of corse. He's only about 2 inches long, but I feel like he adds about 10 inches of coolness to me. Not the best choice of words but you get the picture.
I chose the swallow for no other reason then a random wikipedia reference I once read that said that sailors used to get swallow tattoos after saving a man's life. For some reason it stuck with me and I always thought it was an interesting reminder of something you are destined for that is far greater then what you set out to achieve. That and it was less painful then a big dragon across my back.
As Jake came back in with the sterile bandages I can't help but be proud that I went through with it. See Gabby, I can achieve goals. Pfftttt.
As I mentioned earlier, I probably should have stayed in bed today cause even though it started c.r.a.ppy and got better, I should have known that eventually my less then scholarly habits of skipping cla.s.s would come back and bite me in the a.r.s.e.
Dad was waiting in the front living room (which was odd to begin with) with no TV, no work, no beer even, just sitting there waiting for me to come home from 'school' or wherever the h.e.l.l I was. Judging from the look on his face, he was well aware of my skipping habits of late. Still sore from Frank, I walked into the house slowly, and tried very hard to conceal my new friend; no need to blow my punishment to epic proportions.
"Hey Dad. What are you doing just sitting here?" Let's try playing dumb again.
"Did you have a good day at school Stella?" Dad was sitting on the couch, arms resting on the back of the sofa with one leg propped on top of his other knee. His eyes were trained on me, a piercing stare that bored into my soul. His anger was rolling off of him in waves but he sat there so still, so seemingly calm, so going to kick my a.s.s.
Should I lie? Make up an alien abduction? Admit to doing charity work on the side? Or just lay my cards on the table. Even though I was a demon, Dad still instilled great fear in me so there was no way I was going to test him further. Cards on the table.
"Well, I actually wasn't in school today. I, um, went to the library to start studying for exams." Well almost all the cards. "I've been stressed lately and Bio is really kicking my b.u.t.t so I just wanted to spend the day catching up."
"I see." Long awkward pause. "Stella, can you come and sit down for a minute, I need to talk to you about something."
As I ambled over to the couch and slowly descended onto the cus.h.i.+ons, I knew it was over for me. Demon or not, I was screwed. Might as well shut my trap cause Dad could smell bulls.h.i.+t a mile away.
Leaning forward on his knees, clasping his hands, Dad takes some deep calming breaths before laying into me. "You know Stella, I realize I travel a lot, give you a pretty long leash, to put it mildly, and I've always trusted your decisions. I knew you'd come to me with any problems you had so no need to worry right? I can handle anything you throw at me, I'm sure of it. But you do know there is ONE thing I just can't stomach. ONE thing Stella. What is that ONE thing I can't tolerate?"
"Uh, seafood?"
"Liars!" Dad lashes back at me.
The silence post lash penetrates the room. Dad has never spoken to me like this before. The look on his face was raw anger and utter disappointment. Finally I now understand the almighty parental guilt trip. Then it got a little worse.
"I know you're a liar Stella. I know it. Do you want to know HOW I know it?"
"Um, super human intellect?" I squeak out.
"I know it because the girl sitting here in my living room is not the same girl that I raised. This girl here is acting like a little selfish brat, skipping eight, yes EIGHT cla.s.ses in the past week and a half!" I can see the blood pressure start to fill his neck and face a not so lovely crimson colour. I think he's wrung his hands into sandpaper at this point.
"This girl sitting here before me got a D in Biology and doesn't seem to give a c.r.a.p about her future anymore," he continued. "This girl here, is dressing a little too provocatively for a high school student and don't even get me started on s.h.i.+rking your work responsibilities. Yes, I know all about that too. Perhaps you had better brush up on your story telling skills Stella, as right now your house of cards has just crumbled into nothing."
In barely a whisper I manage to muster a 'sorry Dad' which really just fuelled his fire.
"Sorry? You're sorry?! Pardon the cliche, but sorry isn't going to cut it with me young lady." Wow he young ladied me.
"This all began with that trouble maker boyfriend you've been seeing and I've had it. Gabs has told me enough to know that he is the source behind your stupidity and believe me your good times with him has just come to an abrupt halt." Gasp, traitor Gabs!
"Under my roof, there are no more dates, no more social happy hour, no more ANYTHING until you graduate. You're going to do whatever the c.r.a.p you want once you leave this house, but while under my roof, you won't disrespect me or yourself on some stupid rich kid who probably doesn't give a s.h.i.+t about all the hard work you've put into school, your job and your future. He doesn't give a d.a.m.n about you, I know his type. He doesn't have to. Daddy will fund his screw ups and he'll leave you high and dry after he's had his 'fun' with you. You'll be left wondering what the h.e.l.l you did with your life. You're throwing at all away Stella, and I won't have it."
Ok, I know this would be the time to put up and shut up, but my whole body started to feel like it was on fire again. My hands trembled and I could feel the pressure start to build in me. There was no way I was going to sit here and take all that p.i.s.sing away my future garbage when that is exactly what my father has done with his. Calling the kettle black is a bit of an understatement here Dad.
I stood up from the couch, hands resting on my hips, and let him have it. Not my finest moment I'm sure, but I just couldn't stop myself. The rage took over and I took him out.
"Oh really Dad? You want ME to get MY s.h.i.+t together. End up just like you? Well let me tell you that I am nothing like you! You sit there all high and mighty and preachy about getting off my a.s.s and living a better life, when you have done c.r.a.p all with yours since my mother walked out on you 17 years ago!"
"You know, I think I'll be a little more selective with whom I start taking advice from. Someone with a little bit more respect for themselves instead of a man who's sat around and pined for some phantom woman to come back to him. I mean Age has been in front of you for like 5 years, practically panting after you, but you can't even see it! You're so blind and clueless you can't even begin to understand how to have a normal relations.h.i.+p anymore so who are you to preach to me about how my boyfriend feels about me! You've immersed yourself in your job to the point of becoming a social lepper who has nothing better to do but try and ruin MY life. You haven't felt anything in 17 years except resentment, anger and abandonment. It's just pathetic!" I ticked these all off on my fingers one by one and crossed my arms in front of me. "She's gone, G-O-N-E. She left, she didn't care about you or about me, so excuse me if I prefer to actually live my life instead of shutting myself off from the world like the bitter old man you've become."
Dad just sat there. Sat there and said nothing. Sat there staring at the floor with absolutely nothing to say. I have never talked to him like that; it just boiled and bubbled out of me. The words floated around us like a toxic poisonous gas permeating through the air and infecting our bodies. My stomach felt sick and a huge migraine was starting to form behind my eyes. I couldn't take it back because what I said was actually true, in a really nasty way. I averted his eyes and plunked back down on the couch ripping my bandage and sending a nice jolt of pain through my stomach. I probably deserved it.
Dad sat there for what seemed like an hour which was probably only 2 minutes before speaking in a cold, detached voice, barely above a whisper. A voice I've never heard from him before.
"My personal life is actually none of your business Stella, but yours is still mine while you're living here." And then he stood up and walked away from me. Pausing at the bottom of the stairs he added, "You're grounded until further notice." And that was that. He left the room, shut the door to his office, and I just dropped my head in my hands.
Chapter 22.
When life gives you lemons, have a pity party So my best friend hates me, ratted me out to my Father. My Dad thinks I'm a tramp with no regard for him or for myself. My grades are in the toilet. My hip-ster friend will fade to nothing in a few years and tomorrow is my eighteenth birthday. Good times. I slunk up to my room in a cloud of shame and self loathing. Who am I really? How could I suddenly be so happy and yet making all the people I love miserable? I guess what they say is true - life sucks and then you die. Except I'm not going to. Not anytime soon anyways. Great. I flop down on the bed and call to Harve, I need some doggie hugs. Except he's avoiding me too. I curl up into a ball and will myself to sleep. I need today to be over with. I need to stop thinking a mile a minute and sleep.
When I woke up it was already dark out. The clock read 2 am and my stomach was definitely ready for some food. Peeling myself from my bed I padded to the bathroom to wash up and put my Pj's on. Sneaking a look at Frank I was at least pleased to see my demon healing strength kicked in and he was fully healed, ready to tackle the world with me.
"It's just you and me bub. Aren't you lucky?"
I flipped through my cell, hoping for a make up text from Gabs but there was notta. It left me feeling even more empty and alone. Thank G.o.d for Ash or I would have no friends left at all. I noticed he sent me a good night note around 10.
Hey there. Wanted to say good night and see how your nether regions are fairing? I meant Frank :) Healed up yet? Oh and I have a little something up my sleeve for your birthday tomorrow. Leave your evening free.
He's probably asleep but I text him back regardless. Might as well burst his bubble as soon as he wakes tomorrow. No big night out in the cards for me. I leave out the big scuffle with Dad and mention my grounding only from skipping cla.s.s.
He sends a note back straight away telling me not to worry; he'll figure something out, just head to bed early tomorrow night. This sends my insides into a b.u.t.terfly holding cell. Well at least someone who doesn't think I'm a s.l.u.tty toad. Or maybe he does? Maybe Dad is right after all? Looking at my situation from a birds eye point of view, it doesn't actually look good. Pus.h.i.+ng away your friends/family. Check. s.c.r.e.w.i.n.g up school and getting a tattoo. Check. It does sound like a recipe for disaster but my situation is different. So utterly different. Yes, it's completely unique. Right? But isn't that what they all say on 'Intervention'?
Looking at my pale reflection in my bathroom vanity, my heart just feels wrong. "What the c.r.a.p are you doing Stella Grace?"
With a sigh, I push that thought away and head downstairs for a sandwich. Everything looks better after some PB & J.
The next morning Dad avoids me completely by making an early morning exit and scribbling a hasty note informing me he's gone in to work for the day but that if I value my life I won't venture past the front porch, and no visitors. Period. Point taken. I took the day off work in expectation that it would be filled with balloons, presents, cake, and well, actual people. I don't even get a call from Gabs.
Dad makes it home around 4 and I still haven't made it out of my wiener dog PJ's. I spent the entire day having a pity party for one, loafing on the couch, flicking through about a hundred channels and still watching absolutely nothing. Dad comes into the kitchen, followed by an aroma that makes my mouth water. He's laden with multiple, grease stained take out bags from 'Boho', my fav restaurant in town. It's a little hole in the wall European style bistro located pretty much right next to Grant's. Its' prime locale has inspired me to indulge a little too often on my Sat.u.r.day lunch breaks. Their menu is very eclectic, ranging from Bison to Steak Tartare but my absolute must recommendation is their signature cabbage rolls.
I know what you're thinking. Perhaps pizza, fried chicken, even burgers. Nope. My devotion belongs to their cabbage rolls nestled in a bed of creamy mashed potatoes swimming in real b.u.t.ter. Comfort food at it's finest - exactly what I needed today.
I even spy a small box of red velvet cupcakes fresh from 'Let them eat cake', an amazing bakery over on third street, run by the Young twins. These uber talented sisters began making gorgeous cupcakes for their friends parties about 3 years ago. They could create the most amazing works of art in cake form that I have ever seen; plus they were dee-lish to boot. When Grant's celebrated their 5th anniversary last fall they created wee cupcakes adorned in little designer jeans. Their shoppe opened just last summer but they've been swamped ever since.
I'm speechless that Dad would actually wait in line on a Sat.u.r.day for these babies which has been known to take upwards of 20 minutes. Only the die hard cupcakers would dare attempt that, myself included.
Seeing these gestures from him after the way I spoke last night, hits me like a ton of bricks; the guilt is killing me. That mixed with the loser birthday depression I've been having all day and I start to actually tear up in grat.i.tude. We still haven't said two words to each other but I know I need to make things right. I tear myself off the couch and sheepishly meander into the kitchen tugging up my pants and trying to smooth my rat's nest.
"Dad, about last night, what I said, I'm just feeling like complete c.r.a.p and I am so so very sorry. I..." He cuts me off with a hand wave to avoid the gush.
"Say no more Stells, I think we both got a little in over our heads. I didn't mean to come down so hard on you, but you really p.i.s.sed me off. I guess I haven't been used to you having a - a boyfriend, and I have to say I don't like it one bit." He says 'boyfriend' like he just barfed in his mouth a little bit.
"You're still grounded though, I haven't changed my mind about that. You only have a few more weeks left of school; you can't just p.i.s.s it all away. I won't allow it. Please just give me a few more weeks and maybe I'll try to be a little more reasonable when it comes to letting you see him."
I give him a big smile agreeing to a truce which I gratefully accept. This is about as good as it's going to get and after the c.r.a.ppy way I handled it, I'm ready for some human interaction and zero name calling. "Sure thing Dad, I'll try harder. Promise. Leave it to you to bring out the big guns though, geez mashed potatoes and cake? I didn't stand a chance," I say clearing the dining table of our usual mess - homework, sticky notes and magazines.
"I never said I play fair," he grins as he sets a plethora of take out containers in a make s.h.i.+ft buffet line on the island. Maybe not the worst birthday in the world after all.
At the end of our large feast, Dad disappears into his office and returns with a thick rectangle shaped gift, wrapped in bunny rabbit paper. I open it to reveal an amazing Graphic Design book which shocks the h.e.l.l out of me as Dad's gift giving skills normally involve cash or whatever the pushy sales girl can pitch him in the teen department which is typically too small or plastered in disney idols marketed for girls about 10 years younger then me. He doesn't do well under pressure.
As we're clearing the dishes and brewing some coffees the door bell rings. Dad hightails it to the door and in walks Age with a beautiful bushel of white peonies, my favourite. He looks sheepish and uncomfortable considering my evil rantings about Age's crush on him last night, but perhaps he needed a little push. I mean it is so obvious to everyone, how could he not see it?
Thankfully she's oblivious to his awkwardness and pounces over to me, grabbing me up into a giant bear hug and launching right into our regular routine of silly hollywood headlines. She's a sucker for teen dramas and loves to watch TMZ. Today she begins a debate on who Elena should choose on The Vampire Diaries. I say Damon all the way, but she is a stickler for the good guys.
She has such a knack for relating to teenage girlie c.r.a.p, you'd never know that Age was also a super smart Pre-Vet studies professor at the university with Dad. They met when Harve was a puppy and suffered from a disgusting bout of Giardia in which he had explosive diarrhea all over Dad's imported persian rug. I noticed her crus.h.i.+ng on him immediately; becoming a little too attentive to Harve's p.o.o.p habits. I've always thought she was awesome, a cool older sister, even though she is closer to Dads age. She exudes this zest for life that I could never understand. I tend to lean towards the nerdy homebody type, while she would learn mandarin and jump out of a plane for kicks. She has that healthy vibe about her too; long blond hair that's usually in a ponytail, and never wears a lot of makeup, but doesn't really need to either. She's always active and has a kickin' bod that screams surfer girl. Next to her we are about as opposite as they come, but somehow it works and she completes our bizarre trio. Sarcastic me, scholastic Dad and exuberant Age.
By the time Harve was well past his c.r.a.p issues, she was an honorary member of the Grace family and has been ever since. I could always see the way she watched Dad when she thought no one was paying attention though. Her eyes told the whole truth and I could never understand why he couldn't see it. Or maybe he just didn't want to see it. He really was blind to noticing her as a beautiful woman with whom he could have a relations.h.i.+p with. I'm the last person to want to get involved in that mess so I left it up to them to figure it out; sometimes I think adults are dumber then kids. After awhile I think she sorta gave up on the idea but I know deep down inside she was secretly hanging on to the hope that he would eventually see her as something more. Guys are just plain dumb.
We devoured the cupcakes and lattes heaped with whipped cream chatting about school and who was cheating on who while Dad checked his iPhone and zoned out for the girlie drivel.
The evening couldn't have turned around more in my favour really. With Age here to occupy Dad, it was an easy out for me to escape upstairs faking an early bedtime; Dad would be none the wiser. I had no idea what Ash was planning but I'm pretty sure I should put on something s.e.xier then jams with dogs on them.
Around eight, after way too many wardrobe changes, I opened my window and peered into the darkness surrounding me. I chose the window closest to a tree but it still looked miles away and I had no idea how I was going to sneak out. Dad certainly thought his landscape plans through in antic.i.p.ation of a teenage daughter. It was a cool spring night but that didn't quell the nervous heat waves that began fluttering all around my body. I saw no sign of life, no sign of my escape plan, no sign of anything at all but a few stars and some far off headlights on the highway; the air was calm and utterly silent. I b.u.mped my head on the window pane when my phone suddenly chirped to life with a new text. Please don't tell me he bailed; what a waste of a s.e.xy black bra.
So are you coming or what?
Could you be any more cyptic Grey? I peered out the window again, checking the landscape for life, and this time I saw it, a small flicker of a lantern in the distance. I wrote back.
What am I supposed to do, fly over to meet you? Excuse me for being the bearer of bad news, but I didn't inherit the aviation super power and it's not as if I can walk out the front door. Grounded remember?
He chirped back. Look a little closer.
I stuck my head further out the window peering to the right to see a lovely ladder resting right next to me. It was hidden off to the side cloaked in darkness and perfect for me to s.h.i.+mmy down unnoticed. Well mostly. That little bush at the base of the ladder won't look the same again. I tripped on dismount with cla.s.sic Stella 'grace'.
With my feet finally planted on the ground I brushed the stray leaves from my jeans and tall black boots. I straightened my fitted checkered s.h.i.+rt and looked for any tears in my cropped leather jacket. I couldn't see any damage thankfully, only to my pride.
I turned and stumbled blind into the night slowly making my way towards the little light beacon in the back lot and wondering when my super stealth traits would kick in. I'm thinking never at this rate. Trying to stay upright was a lot harder then you'd think. It's like as soon as the sun goes down, the world s.h.i.+fts like 'Inception' and the most familiar and manicured backyard becomes a war zone of potholes. Now I understand the fumbles and falls the chicks make in the horror movies when they are flailing through the dark and never able to stay vertical.
I glance towards the back of the house as light from the kitchen spills into the yard with a soft glow. Age and Dad are laughing and watching TV on the couch together. They look younger somehow tonight. Dad seems so happy, so easy going. Maybe he's just a crab apple around me. It's hard to imagine your parent as a teenager, feeling insecure and just having fun with no responsibilities. Man I hope Dad gets his s.h.i.+t together about her. They'd really be a great team.
I speed up as fast as I can safely manage to get to Ash. I feel completely giddy about tonight, which probably doesn't aid my co-ordination. Who knew sneaking out of the house would be so exhilarating? Why have I been good for so long? As I round the thicket of trees at the edge of the gorge property line I see him. A black outline against the blue black night sky. He's got the vantage point of seeing me in full with his lantern held out in front while I can only guess at his expressions from my darkened angle.
"Good call with the ladder Grey, very sneaky," I say.
"Well I do have a bit of experience sneaking beautiful girls out of their homes in the dark of night. A favourite pastime of mine."
I can't see his face yet but I can tell from here that his eyes are scanning me. It sends pulses of lighting through my whole body. My breathing becomes more uncontrolled as I walk towards him pus.h.i.+ng the lantern down and to the side so I can finally see his face.
"So really I'm just another notch in the old Grey belt? Maybe you should leave that last part out next time you want to woo. It's kind of a mood killer."
Reaching for my hand, we continue towards the trees. "I can think of other ways to get you back in the mood. Not to worry Stella..." he trails off in a laugh. My heart starts racing like the Indy - time to change the subject.
"Sooo, where's your car parked? Where are we going?"
"You'll see." Is all he says as he pulls me into the woods, stumbling along after him. He never falters, never breaks a branch, nothing. Jerk.
We are heading along my running trail when I'm struck by the thought of how alone we are out here. I mean, a.s.suming Dad won't check on me closely to see the piles of pillows I placed under my covers, no one knows where I am or what I'm doing, or even when I should be home. It sends a thrill through me that ignites that now familiar thrum of electricity I have running through my veins when I've stepped out of the good girl box that I've lived in my whole life.
We are silent on our trek but don't have far to go before we reach a cleared area surrounded by a dozen lanterns, giving the place an ethereal glow. It takes my breath away as I halt in my tracks.
"A little midnight picnic to celebrate your 'coming of age' so to speak. I know, I know, a romantic demon at heart. Sometimes I scare myself."
Chapter 23.
Picnics Blow The setting was perfect. A big cosy red-checkered blanket surrounded by beautiful lanterns perched on giant boulders and hung in trees that seem to be expertly placed in order to achieve the right ambience. I think perhaps mother nature didn't play a role in this formation. Theres a large woven basket in one corner and big fluffy cream velvet pillows in the other three. The idea of what we might use them for makes my mouth dry up like the sahara.
"I didn't know what you'd be hungry for so I brought a little bit of everything." He leads me over to the blanket and we settle in across from one another cross legged, the candlelit glow lending a soft dancing light across our cheeks. For a demon with confidence up the wazoo, he looks around nervously which sends s.h.i.+vers down my spine.
"Um, I did eat a big dinner, but I could go for something to drink?" I say.
"Sure." He turns to rummage through the basket. "I've got some sodas, waters and also managed to wrangle a bottle of 'Fury', that drink we sampled at 'The Devils' Pit'. I think by now you've figured out that it isn't something that humans are privvy to?" His lips curve into a smirk.
"What exactly is in that drink anyways?"
"Oh it's harmless really; a mild infusion that's been enchanted by a simple warlock spell. You don't get a boozy buzz on it the same way regular human alcohol works. Instead it seems to enhance our powers and make us more in tune with our surroundings. Like your senses are heightened in a really wicked way. I thought it might be interesting to try again tonight knowing what you know now about who you are. You can understand why it isn't FDA approved." He chuckles as he digs deep into the basket which by the sounds of the ma.s.sive clinking, he really brought a little bit of everything.
"I'm game. Maybe that's what brought forth my super strength in the bar? Maybe I'm some sort of amazing warrior chick or something?" My mouth curves up into a grin.
"Warrior chick? That's the type of power you're hoping for? Let me tell you that there are way cooler powers to wish for." He pulls out a big clear bottle full of the honey coloured liquid and pours two mugs full for us. I reach for my cup and slug back a big gulp. An incredible sensation as it pours down my throat filling my body with a warm heat.
"Well, it'd be nice to just figure it out someday. Move forward and play with it, see what I can do, you know? It's more then frustrating to find out what I am but not really what I AM. Sometimes I think that I'm going to wake up and it'll all have been a dream."
"Would that be so bad? I mean, you had a good life before I walked in and created a demon portal for you. Are you sure you're ready for this particular door to open?" He takes a sip but looks down into his cup as if it's the most fascinating cup in the history of coffee mugs.
I take another drink and think this through for a minute. I need to articulate to him how I feel without going all gushy chick on him. I set my mug aside on the boulder behind me, grab his cup and place it beside mine. Taking his hands, enjoying the tingle that's spreading through my fingers from his touch, I explain.
"I'm not sure you fully understand where I'm coming from yet Ash. I mean we've spent a lot of time together but in order to get what I feel right now you should know where I've come from. Sure I've had a good life, my Dad is great, grades were good, I had Gabs and led a pretty typical high school life. Except... Except it really wasn't MY life. I could never put my finger on it but I always felt like I was going through the motions and never understanding why I wasn't like everyone else. Why I went to all the same parties and had all the same friends but felt like a complete outsider. An impostor." I took a deep breath before continuing.
"When you came to school I thought I was such loser for thinking you would want anything to do with boring old me. I didn't even know the first thing about flirting with a boy because I've never felt the urge of wanting someone the way I wanted you. When I looked at you it stirred something deep inside of me that no longer felt mundane and well, human. It felt surreal and exciting and for the first time ever, I felt alive. Then you took off and I thought myself a fool for getting attached like that so quickly." I let out a breath and dropped my eyes to our hands which I disentangled to pull my knees into my chest.
"Stella, I...."
"Wait no, I'm not done yet," I say holding up my hand.