Once on a Time Part 8

"I don't know, Mum," said Woggs.

Belvane gave it up. The whole morning was going wrong anyhow.

"Come here, child," she sighed, "and listen. You have been a very naughty girl, but I'm going to let you off this time, and in return I've something you are going to do for me."

"Yes, Mum," said Woggs.

Belvane barely shuddered now. A sudden brilliant plan had come to her.

"Her Royal Highness is about to review her Army of Amazons. It is a sudden idea of her Royal Highness's, and it comes at an unfortunate moment, for it so happens that the Army is--er----" _What_ was the Army doing? Ah, yes--"manoeuvring in a distant part of the country.

But we must not disappoint her Royal Highness. What then shall we do, Woggs?"

"I don't know, Mum," said Woggs stolidly.

Not having expected any real a.s.sistance from her, the Countess went on, "I will tell you. You see yonder tree? Armed to the teeth _you_ will march round and round it, giving the impression to one on this side of a large army pa.s.sing. For this you will be rewarded. Here is----" She felt in the bag she carried. "No, on second thoughts I will owe it to you. Now you quite understand?"

"Yes, Mum," said Woggs.

"Very well, then. Run along to the Palace and get a sword and a helmet and a bow and an arrow and an--an arrow and anything you like, and then come back here and wait behind those bushes. When I clap my hands the army will begin to march."

Woggs curtsied and ran off.

It is probable that at this point the Countess would have resumed her soliloquy, but we shall never know, for the next moment the Princess and her Court were seen approaching from the other end of the glade.

Belvane advanced to meet them.

"Good morning, your Royal Highness," she said, "a beautiful day, is it not?"

"Beautiful, Countess."

With the Court at her back, Hyacinth for the moment was less nervous than usual, but almost at the first words of the Countess she felt her self-confidence oozing from her. Did I say I was like this with my publishers? And Roger's dragged-in Uncle----one can't explain it.

The Court stood about in picturesque att.i.tudes while Belvane went on:

"Your Royal Highness's brave Women Defenders, the Home Defence Army of Amazons" (here she saluted; one soon gets into the knack of it, and it gives an air of efficiency) "have looked forward to this day for weeks. How their hearts fill with pride at the thought of being reviewed by your Royal Highness!"

She had paid, or rather received, the money for the Army so often that she had quite got to believe in its existence. She even kept a roll of the different companies (it meant more delightful red ink for one thing), and wrote herself little notes recommending Corporal Gretal Hottshott for promotion to sergeant.

"I know very little about armies, I'm afraid," said Hyacinth. "I've always left that to my father. But I think it's a sweet idea of yours to enrol the women to defend me. It's a little expensive, is it not?"

"Your Royal Highness, armies are _always_ expensive."

The Princess took her seat, and beckoned Wiggs with a smile to her side. The Court, in att.i.tudes even more picturesque than before, grouped itself behind her.

"Is your Royal Highness ready?"

"Quite ready, Countess."

The Countess clapped her hands.

There was a moment's hesitation, and then, armed to the teeth, Amazon after Amazon marched by. . . .

An impressive scene. . . .

However, Wiggs must needs try to spoil it.

"Why, it's Woggs!" she cried.

"Silly child!" said Belvane in an undertone, giving her a push.

The Princess looked round inquiringly.

"The absurd creature," explained the Countess, "thought she recognized a friend in your Royal Highness's gallant Army."

"How clever of her! They all look exactly alike to _me_."

Belvane was equal to the occasion.

"The uniform and discipline of an army have that effect rather," she said. "It has often been noticed."

"I suppose so," said the Princess vaguely. "Oughtn't they to march in fours? I seem to remember, when I came to reviews with Father----"

"Ah, your Royal Highness, that was an army of men. With women--well, we found that if they marched side by side, they _would_ talk all the time."

The Court, which had been resting on the right leg with the left knee bent, now rested on the left leg with the right knee bent. Woggs also was getting tired. The last company of the Army of Amazons was not marching with the abandon of the first company.

[Ill.u.s.tration: _Armed to the teeth, Amazon after Amazon marched by_]

"I think I should like them to halt now so that I can address them,"

said Hyacinth.

Belvane was taken aback for the moment.

"I am afraid, your--your Royal Highness," she stammered, her brain working busily all the time, "that that would be contrary to--to--to the spirit of--er--the King's Regulations. An army--an army in marching order--must--er--_march_." She made a long forward movement with her hand. "Must march," she repeated, with an innocent smile.

"I see," said Hyacinth, blus.h.i.+ng guiltily again.

Belvane gave a loud cough. The last veteran but two of the Army looked inquiringly at her and pa.s.sed. The last veteran but one came in and was greeted with a still louder cough. Rather tentatively the last veteran of all entered and met such an unmistakable frown that it was obvious that the march-past was over. . . . Woggs took off her helmet and rested in the bushes.

"That is all, your Royal Highness," said Belvane. "158 marches past, 217 reported sick, making 622; 9 are on guard at the Palace--632 and 9 make 815. Add 28 under age and we bring it up to the round thousand."

Wiggs opened her mouth to say something, but decided that her mistress would probably wish to say it instead. Hyacinth, however, merely looked unhappy.

Belvane came a little nearer.

"I--er--forgot if I mentioned to your Royal Highness that we are paying out today. One silver piece a day and several days in the week, multiplied by--how many did I say?--comes to ten thousand pieces of gold." She produced a doc.u.ment, beautifully ruled. "If your Royal Highness would kindly initial here----"

Mechanically the Princess signed.