The Man Who Was Afraid - BestLightNovel.com
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Ignat was silent for awhile, drank some more vodka and went on instinctively:
"It is necessary to have pity on men. You are right in doing so. But you must pity them sensibly. First look at a man, find out what good there is in him, and what use may be made of him! And if you find him to be strong and capable--pity and a.s.sist him. And if he is weak and not inclined to work--spit upon him, pa.s.s him by. Just keep this in mind--the man who complains against everything, who sighs and moans all the time--that man is worth nothing; he merits no compa.s.sion and you will do him no good whatever, even if you help him. Pity for such people makes them more morose, spoils them the more. In your G.o.dfather's house you saw various kinds of people--unfortunate travellers and hangers-on, and all sorts of rabble. Forget them. They are not men, they are just sh.e.l.ls, and are good for nothing. They are like bugs, fleas and other unclean things. Nor do they live for G.o.d's sake--they have no G.o.d. They call His name in vain, in order to move fools to pity, and, thus pitied, to fill their bellies with something. They live but for their bellies, and aside from eating, drinking, sleeping and moaning they can do nothing. And all they accomplish is the soul's decay. They are in your way and you trip over them. A good man among them--like fresh apples among bad ones--may soon be spoilt, and no one will profit by it. You are young, that's the trouble. You cannot comprehend my words. Help him who is firm in misery. He may not ask you for a.s.sistance, but think of it yourself, and a.s.sist him without his request. And if he should happen to be proud and thus feel offended at your aid, do not allow him to see that you are lending him a helping hand. That's the way it should be done, according to common sense! Here, for example, two boards, let us say, fall into the mud--one of them is a rotten one, the other, a good sound board. What should you do? What good is there in the rotten board?
You had better drop it, let it stay in the mud and step on it so as not to soil your feet. As to the sound board, lift it up and place it in the sun; if it can be of no use to you, someone else may avail himself of it. That's the way it is, my son! Listen to me and remember. There is no reason why Yefim should be pitied. He is a capable fellow, he knows his value. You cannot knock his soul out with a box on the ear. I'll just watch him for about a week, and then I'll put him at the helm. And there, I am quite sure, he'll be a good pilot. And if he should be promoted to captain, he wouldn't lose courage--he would make a clever captain! That's the way people grow. I have gone through this school myself, dear. I, too, received more than one box on the ear when I was of his age. Life, my son, is not a dear mother to all of us. It is our exacting mistress."
Ignat talked with his son about two hours, telling him of his own youth, of his toils, of men; their terrible power, and of their weakness; of how they live, and sometimes pretend to be unfortunate in order to live on other people's money; and then he told him of himself, and of how he rose from a plain working man to be proprietor of a large concern. The boy listened to his words, looked at him and felt as though his father were coming nearer and nearer to him. And though his father's story did not contain the material of which Aunt Anfisa's fairy-tales were brimful, there was something new in it, something clearer and more comprehensible than in her fairy-tales, and something just as interesting. Something powerful and warm began to throb within his little heart, and he was drawn toward his father. Ignat, evidently, surmised his son's feelings by his eyes: he rose abruptly from his seat, seized him in his arms and pressed him firmly to his breast. And Foma embraced his neck, and, pressing his cheek to that of his father, was silent and breathed rapidly.
"My son," whispered Ignat in a dull voice, "My darling! My joy! Learn while I am alive. Alas! it is hard to live."
The child's heart trembled at this whisper; he set his teeth together, and hot tears gushed from his eyes.
Until this day Ignat had never kindled any particular feeling in his son: the boy was used to him; he was tired of looking at his enormous figure, and feared him slightly, but was at the same time aware that his father would do anything for him that he wanted. Sometimes Ignat would stay away from home a day, two, a week, or possibly the entire summer.
And yet Foma did not even notice his absence, so absorbed was he by his love for Aunt Anfisa. When Ignat returned the boy was glad, but he could hardly tell whether it was his father's arrival that gladdened him or the playthings he brought with him. But now, at the sight of Ignat, the boy ran to meet him, grasped him by the hand, laughed, stared into his eyes and felt weary if he did not see him for two or three hours: His father became interesting to him, and, rousing his curiosity, he fairly developed love and respect for himself. Every time that they were together Foma begged his father:
"Papa, tell me about yourself."
The steamer was now going up the Volga. One suffocating night in July, when the sky was overcast with thick black clouds, and everything on the Volga was somewhat ominously calm, they reached Kazan and anch.o.r.ed near Uslon at the end of an enormous fleet of vessels. The clinking of the anchor chains and the shouting of the crew awakened Foma; he looked out of the window and saw, far in the distance, small lights glimmering fantastically: the water about the boat black and thick, like oil--and nothing else could be seen. The boy's heart trembled painfully and he began to listen attentively. A scarcely audible, melancholy song reached his ears--mournful and monotonous as a chant on the caravan the watchmen called to one another; the steamer hissed angrily getting up steam.
And the black water of the river splashed sadly and quietly against the sides of the vessels. Staring fixedly into the darkness, until his eyes hurt, the boy discerned black piles and small lights dimly burning high above them. He knew that those were barges, but this knowledge did not calm him and his heart throbbed unevenly, and, in his imagination, terrifying dark images arose.
"O-o-o," a drawling cry came from the distance and ended like a wail.
Someone crossed the deck and went up to the side of the steamer.
"O-o-o," was heard again, but nearer this time.
"Yefim!" some one called in a low voice on the deck. "Yefimka!"
"Well?"
"Devil! Get up! Take the boat-hook."
"O-o-o," someone moaned near by, and Foma, shuddering, stepped back from the window.
The queer sound came nearer and nearer and grew in strength, sobbed and died out in the darkness. While on the deck they whispered with alarm:
"Yefimka! Get up! A guest is floating!"
"Where?" came a hasty question, then bare feet began to patter about the deck, a bustle was heard, and two boat-hooks slipped down past the boy's face and almost noiselessly plunged into the water.
"A gue-e-est!" Some began to sob near by, and a quiet, but very queer splash resounded.
The boy trembled with fright at this mournful cry, but he could not tear his hands from the window nor his eyes from the water.
"Light the lantern. You can't see anything."
"Directly."
And then a spot of dim light fell over the water. Foma saw that the water was rocking calmly, that a ripple was pa.s.sing over it, as though the water were afflicted, and trembled for pain.
"Look! Look!" they whispered on the deck with fright.
At the same time a big, terrible human face, with white teeth set together, appeared on the spot of light. It floated and rocked in the water, its teeth seemed to stare at Foma as though saying, with a smile:
"Eh, boy, boy, it is cold. Goodbye!"
The boat-hooks shook, were lifted in the air, were lowered again into the water and carefully began to push something there.
"Shove him! Shove! Look out, he may be thrown under the wheel."
"Shove him yourself then."
The boat-hooks glided over the side of the steamer, and, scratching against it, produced a noise like the grinding of teeth. Foma could not close his eyes for watching them. The noise of feet stamping on the deck, over his head, was gradually moving toward the stern. And then again that moaning cry for the dead was heard:
"A gue-e-est!"
"Papa!" cried Foma in a ringing voice. "Papa!" His father jumped to his feet and rushed toward him.
"What is that? What are they doing there?" cried Foma.
Wildly roaring, Ignat jumped out of the cabin with huge bounds. He soon returned, sooner than Foma, staggering and looking around him, had time to reach his father's bed.
"They frightened you? It's nothing!" said Ignat, taking him up in his arms. "Lie down with me."
"What is it?" asked Foma, quietly.
"It was nothing, my son. Only a drowned man. A man was drowned and he is floating. That's nothing! Don't be afraid, he has already floated clear of us."
"Why did they push him?" interrogated the boy, firmly pressing close to his father, and shutting his eyes for fright.
"It was necessary to do so. The water might have thrown him under the wheel. Under ours, for instance. Tomorrow the police would notice it, there would be trouble, inquests, and we would be held here for examination. That's why we shoved him along. What difference does it make to him? He is dead; it doesn't pain him; it doesn't offend him. And the living would be troubled on his account. Sleep, my son.
"So he will float on that way?"
"He will float. They'll take him out somewhere and bury him."
"And will a fish devour him?"
"Fish do not eat human bodies. Crabs eat them. They like them."
Foma's fright was melting, from the heat of his father's body, but before his eyes the terrible sneering face was still rocking in the black water.
"And who is he?"
"G.o.d knows! Say to G.o.d about him: 'Oh Lord, rest his soul! '"
"Lord, rest his soul!" repeated Foma, in a whisper.