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"Yes, once I was, when my father was knocked down by an omnibus, and was very ill."
"Tell us about it?" said Susan.
She did tell them of her week of sorrow and anxious care of the younger children, and the brightening ray of hope at last. It seemed to freshen both up, and give them hopes, for each drew a long sigh of relief; and then Sam said, "Papa wrote to Mr. Carey. She is to be prayed for in church to-morrow."
"Oh," said Susan, with a sound as of dismay, which made Christabel ask in wonder why she was sorry, when, from Susan's half-uttered words, she found that the little girl fancied that a "happy issue out of all her afflictions" meant death.
"Oh no, my dear," she said. "What it means is, that the afflictions may end happily in whatever way G.o.d may see to be best; it may be in getting well; it may be the other way: at any rate, it is asking that the distress may be over, not saying how."
"Isn't there some other prayer in the Prayer-book about it?" said Sam, looking straight before him.
"I will show you where to find it, in the Visitation of the Sick. I dare say it has often been read to her."
The boy and girl came in with her, and brought their Prayer-books to her room, that she might mark them.
This had been a strange, long, sad day of waiting and watching for the telegram, and the children even fancied it might come in the middle of the night; but Miss Fosbrook thought this unlikely, and looked for the morrow's post. There was no letter. It was very disappointing, but Miss Fosbrook thought it a good sign, since at least the danger could not be more pressing, and delay always left room for hope.
The children readily believed her; they were too young to go on dwelling long on what was not in sight; and even Susan was cheerful, and able to think about other things after her night's rest, and the relief of not hearing a worse account.
The children might do as they pleased about going to church on saints' days, and on this day all the three girls wished to go, as soon as it had been made clear that even if the message should come before the short service would be over, there would be ample time to reach the station before the next train. Miss Fosbrook was glad to prove this, for not only did she wish to have them in church, but she thought the weary watching for the telegram was the worst thing possible for Susan. Sam was also going to church, but Henry hung back, after accompanying them to the end of the kitchen-garden. "I wouldn't go, Sam; just suppose if the message came without anyone at home, and you had to set out at once!"
"We couldn't," said Sam; "there's no train."
"Oh, but they always put on a special train whenever anyone is ill."
"Then there would be plenty!"
"At least they did when Mr. Greville's mother was ill, so they will now; and then you may ride upon the engine, for there won't be any carriages, you know. I say, Sam, if you go to church, and the telegraph comes, I shall set off."
"You'll do no such thing," said Sam. "You had much better come to church."
"No, I sha'n't. It is like a girl to go to church on a week-day."
"It is much more like a girl to mind what a couple of a.s.ses, like the Grevilles, say," returned Sam, taking up his cap and running after his sisters and their governess.
"It is quite right," observed Henry to John and David, who alone remained to listen to him, "that one of us should stay in case the telegraph comes in, and there are any orders to give. I can catch the pony, you know, and ride off to Bonchamp, and if the special train is there, I shall get upon the engine."
"But it is Sam and Susan who are going."
"Oh, that's only because Sam is eldest. I know Mamma would like to have me much better, because I don't walk hard like Sam; and when I get there, she will be so much better already, and we shall be all right; and Admiral Penrose will be so delighted at my courage in riding on the engine and putting out the explosion, or something, that he will give me my appointment as naval cadet at once, and I shall have a dirk and a uniform, and a chest of my own, and be an officer, and get promoted for firing red-hot shot out of the batteries at Gibraltar."
"Master Hal!" exclaimed Purday, "don't throw them little apples about."
"They are red-hot shot, Purday!"
"I'll red-hot shot you if you break my cuc.u.mber frames, young gentleman! Come, get out with you."
Probably anxiety made Purday cross as well as everyone else, or else he distrusted Henry's discretion without Sam, for he hunted the little boys away wherever they went. Now they would break the cuc.u.mber frames; now they would meddle with the gooseberries, or trample on the beds; and at last he only relented so far as to let David stay with him on condition of being very good, and holding the little cabbages as he planted them out.
"Master Davie was a solemn one," Purday said, and they were great friends; but Hal and Johnnie were fairly turned out, as their idle hands were continually finding fresh mischief to do in their sauntering desultory mood.
"I think," said Hal, "since Purday is so savage, we'll go and look out at the gate, and then we shall see if the telegraph comes."
Johnnie had no clear idea what a telegraph was, and was curious to know how it would come, rather expecting it to be a man in a red coat on horseback, blowing a horn--a sight that certainly was not to be missed; so he willingly strolled down after Henry to the gate leading to the lane.
"I can't see any way at all," said Henry, looking out into the lane.
"I shall get up, and so see over into the bend of the road;" and Hal mounted to the topmost bar of the gate, and sat astride there, John scrambling after him not quite so easily, his legs being less long, and his dress less convenient. Both knew that their Papa strongly objected to their climbing on this iron gate, the newest and handsomest thing about the place; but thought Hal, "Of course no one will care what I do when I am so anxious about poor Mamma!" and thought Johnnie, "What Hal does, of course I may do!"
So there the two young gentlemen sat perched, each with one leg on either side of the new iron gate. It was rather like sitting on the edge of a knife; and John could scarcely reach his toes down to rest them on the bar below, but he held on by the spikes, and it was so new and glorious a position, that it made up for a good deal to be five feet above the road; moreover, Hal said it was just like the mast-head of a man-of-war--at LEAST, when the waves didn't dash right overhead, like the picture of the Eddystone Lighthouse.
"Hollo! what, a couple of cherubs aloft!" cried a voice from the road; and looking round, Henry beheld the two Grevilles.
"Yes," he answered; "it's very jolly up here."
"Eh! is it? Riding on a razor, to my mind. Come down, and have a lark," said Osmond; while Martin, undoing the gate, proceeded to swing it backwards and forwards, to John's extreme terror; but the more he clung to the spikes, and cried for mercy, the quicker Martin swung it, shouting with laughter at his fright. Henry meanwhile scrambled and tumbled to the ground, and caught the gate and held it fast, while he asked what his friends had been about. One held up a scarlet flask of powder, the other a bag of shot.
"You haven't got a gun!"
"No, but we know where gardener keeps his; and the governor's out for the day. Come along, Hal: you shall have your turn."
"I don't want to go far from home to-day."
"Oh, stuff! What was it Mamma heard, Osmond? That your mother was ever so much better, wasn't it?"
"I thought it was worse," said Osmond.
"Well, never mind: your hanging about here won't do her any good, I suppose."
"No; but--"
"Oh, he'll catch it from the governess!--I say, how many seams shall you have to sew to-day, Hal?"
"I don't sew seams: I do as I please."
"Ha! Is that them coming out of church!"
"Oh, it is! it is!" cried John from his elevation. "Oh, help me down, Hal!"
But Henry did not want Miss Fosbrook to find him partaking in gate- climbing; and either that desire, or the general terror a bad conscience, made him and the Grevilles run helter-skelter the opposite way, leaving poor little John stuck on the top of the gate, quite giddy at the thought of coming down alone, and almost as much afraid of being there caught by Miss Fosbrook coming home from church.
It was a false alarm after all, that the congregation were coming out. John would have been glad if they had; for nothing could be more miserable than sitting up there, his fingers tired of clutching the spikes, his feet strained with reaching down to the bar, his legs chilled with the wind, his head almost giddy when he thought of climbing down. He would have cried, could he have spared a hand to rub his eyes with; he had a great mind to have roared for help, especially when he heard feet upon the road; but these turned out to belong to five little village boys, still smaller than himself, who, when they saw the young gentleman on his perch, all stood still in a row, with their mouths wide open, staring at him. Johnnie scorned to let them think he was not riding there for his own pleasure; so he tried to put a bold face of the matter, and look as much at ease and indifferent as he could, under great bodily fear and discomfort, the injury of his brother's desertion, the expectation of disgrace, and the reflection that he was being disobedient to his parents in the height of their trouble!
There is nothing in grief that of necessity makes children or grown people good. Sometimes, especially when there is suspense, it fills them with excitement, as well as putting them out of their usual habits; and thus it often happens that there are tremendous explosions of naughtiness just when some one is ill in a house, and the children ought to be most good. But it is certain that unless trouble be taken in the right way, it makes people worse instead of better
CHAPTER XI.