A Select Collection of Old English Plays Volume I Part 10

Ensample may be by this that is pa.s.sed, How servants be deceitful in their master's folly, Nothing but for lucre is all their bawdry. [_Aside_.

CEL. It pleaseth me, Parmeno, that we together May speak, whereby thou may'st see I love thee, Yet undeserved[50] now thou comest hither; Whereof I care not; but virtue warneth me To flee temptation, and follow charity: To do good against ill, and so I read thee, Semp.r.o.nio, and I will help thy necessities.

And in token now that it shall so be, I pray thee among us let us have a song.

For where harmony is, there is amity.

PAR. What, an old woman sing?

CEL. Why not among?

I pray thee no longer the time prolong.

PAR. Go to; when thou wilt, I am ready.

CEL. Shall I begin?

PAR. Yea, but take not too high. [_Cantant_.

CEL. How say ye now by this, little young fool?[51]

For the third part Semp.r.o.nio we must get.

After that thy master shall come to school To sing the fourth part, that his purse shall sweat; For I see craftly the song can set.

Though thy master be hoa.r.s.e, his purse shall sing clear, And taught to solf,[52] that woman's flesh is dear.

How say'st to this, thou praty[53] Parmeno?

Thou knowest not the world nor no delights therein: Dost understand me? in faith, I trow no, Thou art young enough the game to begin; Thy master hath waded himself so far in, And to bring him out lieth not in me, old poor-- PAR. Thou shouldst say it lieth not in me, old wh.o.r.e.

CEL. Ah, wh.o.r.eson, a shame take such a knave!

How darest thou with me, thou boy, be so bold?

PAR. Because such knowledge of thee I have.

CEL. Why, who art?

PAR. Parmeno, son to Albert the old; I dwelt with thee by the river, where wine was sold, And thy mother, I trow, hight Claudena.

That a wild-fire bren thee, Celestina!

CEL. But thy mother was as old a wh.o.r.e as I.

Come hither, thou little fool, let me see thee: Ah, it is even he, by our blessed lady!

What, little urchin, hast forgotten me?

When thou layest at my bed's-feet, how merry were we!

PAR. Ah, thou old matron,[54] it were alms thou were dead!

How wouldest thou pluck me up to thy bed's head, And embrace me hard unto thy belly!

And for thou smelled'st oldly, I ran from thee.

CEL. A shameful wh.o.r.eson! fie upon thee, fie, fie!

Come hither, and now shortly I charge thee, That all this foolish speaking thou let be.

Leave wantonness of youth; then shalt thou do well; Follow the doctrine of thy elders and counsel.

To whom thy parents (on whose souls G.o.d have mercy!) In pain of cursing bade thee be obedient.

In pain whereof, I command thee straitly, Too much in masters.h.i.+p put not thine intent: No trust is in them, if thine own be spent.

Masters nowadays covet to bring about All for themselves, and let their servants go without.

Thy master, men say, and as I think he be, But light care ich[55] not--who come to his service; Fair words shall not lack, but small rewards, trust me.

Make Semp.r.o.nio thy friend in any wise; For he can handle him in the best guise.

Keep this, and for thy profit: tell it to none; But look that Semp.r.o.nio and thou be one.

PAR. Mother Celestine, I wot not what ye mean; Calisto is my master, and so I will take him, And as for riches I defy it clean; For whosoever with wrong rich doth make him, Sooner than he gat it, it will forsake him.

I love to live in joyful poverty, And to serve my master with truth and honesty.

CEL. Truth and honesty be riches of the name; But surety of wealth[56] is to have riches, And after that for to get him good fame.

By report of friends, this is truth, doubtless; Then no such manner friend can I express As Semp.r.o.nio, for both your profits to speed; Which lieth in my hands now, if ye be agreed.

O Parmeno, what a life may we endure!

Semp.r.o.nio loveth the daughter of Eliso-- PAR. And who? Arusa?

CEL. Likest her?

PAR. Peradventure?

CEL. I shall get her to thee, that shall I do.

PAR. Nay, mother Celestine, I purpose not so.

A man should be conversant, I hear tell, With them that be ill, and think to do well.

Semp.r.o.nio, his ensample shall not make me Better nor worse; nor his faults will I hide; But, mother Celestine, a question to thee-- Is not sin anon in one espied?

That is drowned in delight, how should he provide Against virtue to save his honesty?

CEL. Like a child without wisdom thou answerest me.

Without company mirth can have none estate: Use no sloth; nature abhorreth idleness, Which leseth delight to nature appropriate.

In sensual causes delight is chief mistress; Specially recounting love's business.

To say thus doth she: the time thus they pa.s.s, And such manner they use, and thus they kiss and ba.s.s; And thus they meet and embrace together.

What speech, what grace, what plays is between them!

Where is she? there she goeth; let us see whither: Now pleased, now froward; now mum, now hem!

Strike up, minstrel, with saws of love, the old problem.

Sing sweet songs; now jousts and tourney.

Of new inventions what conceits find they?

Now she goeth to ma.s.s; to-morrow she cometh out.

Behold her better; yonder goeth a cuckold.

I left her alone: she cometh: turn about!-- Lo thus, Parmeno, thou mayest behold Friends will talk together, as I have told.

Wherefore perceive thou, that I say truly, Never can be delight without company.

_Hic iterum intrat_ CALISTO.

CAL. Mother, as I promised to a.s.soil thy doubt, Here I give thee an hundred pieces of gold.

CEL. Sir, I promise you I shall bring it about, All thing to purpose, even as ye would; For your reward I will do as I should.

Be merry, fear nothing, content ye shall be.

CAL. Then, mother, farewell; be diligent, I pray thee.

[_Exit Celestine_.

How sayest, Semp.r.o.nio, have I done well?

SEM. Yea, sir, in my mind, and most according.

CAL. Then wilt thou do after my counsel?

After this old woman will thou be hieing, To remember and haste her in everything.

SEM. Sir, I am content, as ye command me.

CAL. Then go, and bid Parmeno come, I pray thee.

[_Exit Semp.r.o.nio_.

Now G.o.d be their guides! the posts[57] of my life, My relief from death, the amba.s.sadors of my wealth!

My hope, my hap; my quietness, my strife; My joy, my sorrow; my sickness, my health.

The hope of this old woman; my heart telleth That comfort shall come shortly, as I intend.

Or else come, death, and make of me an end.

_Enter_ PARMENO.

PAR. In faith, it maketh no force nor matter mich, CAL. What sayest, Parmeno, what sayest to me?

PAR. Marry, I say plainly, that yonder old witch And Semp.r.o.nio together will undo thee.

CAL. Ah, ill-tongued wretch, will ye not see?

Thinkest thou, lurden, thou handlest me fair?

Why, knave, wouldest thou put me in despair?

[_Exit Calisto_.

PAR. Lo, sirs, my master, ye see, is angry; But this it is, tell fools for their profit, Or warn them for their wealth, it is but folly; For strike them on the heel, and as much wit Shall come forth at their forehead to perceive it.

Go thy way, Calisto, for on my charge Thy thrift is sealed up, though thou be at large.

Oh, how unhappy I am to be true; For other men win by falsehood and flattery: I lose for my truth: the world doth so ensue, Truth is put back, and taken for folly.

Therefore now I will change my copy.

If I had done, as Celestine bad me, Calisto to his mission still would have had me.

This giveth me warning from henceforward How to deal with him for all thing as he will: I will [be] the same forward or backward.

I will go straight to him, and follow him still: Say as he saith, be it good or ill; And sith these bawds get good provoking lechery, I trust flattery shall speed as well as bawdry.