A Select Collection of Old English Plays Volume Xi Part 97

FLA. Mark! his fair daughter Flavia, ha, ha, ha!

Most shameless villain, how he counterfeits!

ANT. Know'st not thy father, old Antonio?

Is all the world grown frantic?

FLA. What, Antonio?

ANT. Thy loving father, Flavia.

FLA. My father!

Would thou wert in his place. Antonio's dead, Dead, under water drown'd.

ANT. That dead and drown'd Am I.

FLA. I love not to converse with dead men.

ANT. Ope the door, sweet Flavia.

FLA. Sir, I am afeard; Horror incloses me, my hairs stand up, I sweat to hear a dead man speak: you smell Of putrefaction; fie! I feel't hither.

ANT. Th' art much abus'd; I live. Come down, and know me.

ARM. Mistress, let me have some sport too.

Who's there?

ANT. Let me come in.

ARM. Soft, soft, sir; y' are too hasty.

ANT. Quickly, or else----

ARM. Good words, good words, I pray, sir, In strangers' houses! were the doors your own, You might be bolder.

ANT. I'll beat the doors and windows About your ears.

ARM. Are you so hot? We'll cool you.

Since your late drowning, your grey and reverend head Is smear'd with ooze, and stuck with c.o.c.kle-sh.e.l.ls: This is to wash it. [_Throws water on him._

ANT. Impudent wh.o.r.e!

ARM. Out, carter: Hence, dirty whipstock,[328] hence, You foul clown; begone, or all the water I can make or borrow shall once more drown you.

SCENE V.

LELIO, ANTONIO, ARMELLINA.

LEL. Armellina, whom do you draw your tongue upon so sharply?

ARM. Sir, 'tis your father's ghost, that strives by force To break the doors, and enter.

LEL. This! his grave looks!

In every lineament himself no liker.

Had I not happily been advertised, What could have forc'd me think 'twere Trincalo?

Doubtless th' astrologer hath rais'd a ghost, That walks in th' reverend shape of my dead father.

ANT. These ghosts, these Trincalos, and astrologers, Strike me beside myself. Who will receive me, When mine own son refuseth? O Antonio!

LEL. Infinite power of art! who would believe The planets' influence could transform a man To several shapes? I could now beat him soundly, But that he wears the awful countenance Of my dead father, whose memory I reverence.

ANT. If I be chang'd beyond thy knowledge, son,

Consider that th' excess of heat in Barbary, The fear of s.h.i.+pwreck, and long tedious journeys, Have tann'd my skin, and shrunk my eyes and cheeks; Yet still this face, though alter'd, may be known: This scar bears witness; 'twas the wound thou cur'dst With thine own hands.

LEL. He that chang'd Trincalo T' Antonio's figure omitted not the scar As a main character.

ANT. I have no other marks Or reasons to persuade thee: methinks these words,[329]

_I am thy father_, were argument sufficient To bend thy knees, and creep to my embracement.

LEL. A sudden coldness strikes me: my tender heart[330]

Beats with compa.s.sion of I know not what.

Sirrah, begone; truss up your goodly speeches, Sad s.h.i.+pwrecks and strange transformations; Your plot's discover'd, 'twill not take: thy impudence For once I pardon. The pious reverence I owe to th' grave resemblance of my father Holds back my angry hands. Hence! if I catch you Haunting my doors again, I'll bastinado you Out of Antonio's skin. Away.

ANT. I go, sir; And yield to such cross fortune as thus drives me. [_Exeunt._

SCENE VI.

TRINCALO, _and_ BEVILONA _dressing him_.

TRIN. When this transformed substance[331] of my carcase Did live imprison'd in a wanton hogshead, My name was Don Antonio, and that t.i.tle Preserv'd my life, and chang'd my suit of clothes.

How kindly the good gentlewoman used me!

With what respect and careful tenderness!

[BEV.] Your wors.h.i.+p, sir, had ever a sickly const.i.tution, and I fear much more now, since your long travel. As you love me, off with these wet things, and put on the suit you left with me, before you went to Barbary. Good sir, neglect not your health; for, upon my experience, there is nothing worse for the rheum than to be drenched in a musty hogshead.

[TRIN.] Pretty soul! such another speech would have drawn off my legs and arms, as easily as hose and doublet. Had I been Trincalo, I'd have sworn th' had cheated: but, fie! 'tis base and clownish to suspect, and ['tis] a gentleman's freeness to part with a cast suit. Now to the business: I'll into my own house, and first bestow Armellina upon Trincalo; then try what can be done for Pandolfo: for 'tis a rule I want t' observe, first do your own affairs, and next your master's. This word master makes me doubt I am not changed as I should be. But all's one: I'll venture, and do something worthy Antonio's name while I have it.

SCENE VII.

ANTONIO, TRINCALO.

ANT. Wretched Antonio! hast been preserv'd so strangely From foreign miseries, to be wrong'd at home?

Barr'd from thy house by the scorn of thine own children?

[TRINCALO _knocks_.

But stay, there's one knocks boldly; 't may be some friend.

[TRINCALO _knocks again_.

Dwell you here, gentleman?