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"I repent o't," replied Andrew, with dry lips, and a gurgling of the throat, as if he had been on the eve of choking.
"Then, I fancy," continued Mrs Jean Todd, "ye would like yer name back again?"
"Ou ay--surely," replied Andrew.
"Well, then," said she, as she with the greatest coolness took up her scissors that hung by her side, and with affected precision cut away his name; "there it is"--handing it to him. And turning to the deacon--"The rest is yours, sir--I hae nae richt to meddle wi' your name--there's yer paper"--returning to him the mutilated bill.
At this operation the deacon stared with a stupified look of wonder and contempt. He had never before seen so cool an example of female rule and marital weakness; and his pride, his selfishness, and his spite were all roused and interested by the extraordinary sight. He was too much affected for indulging in a vulgar expression of feelings which could not adequately be expressed by mere language. Taking up his hat, and casting upon the boxmaster a look of sovereign contempt, and upon Mrs Jean Todd one of anger, he bowed as low as a deacon ought to do, and left the room. The circ.u.mstance produced no very unpleasant consequences to either the boxmaster or his wife. She, no doubt, reproved him for his stupidity; but the point of her wrath was turned away by the repentance and soft words of her husband, who promised never to do the like again. He had, besides, some defence, arising out of her dubious conduct, which, though quite easily understood, he could not well comprehend. The navete of his statement, that "she shouldna hae left him unprotected," was quite enough to have mollified a much sterner woman than Mrs Jean Todd, and during that same night they were a far happier couple than Deacon Waldie and his fair spouse.
When the deacon went home, and reported the extraordinary proceeding to his obedient wife, the grief it occasioned was in some degree overcome, on the part of the husband, by the favourable contrast it enabled him to form between the boxmaster and his wife, and him and his obedient spouse. Mrs Waldie did all in her power to aid the operation; but she did not forget the bill, which her father was pressing hard to procure.
"Surely every man's no under the rule o' his wife," said she, with the view to leading to another cautioner.
"No, G.o.d be thanked!" said the deacon, "there are some independent men i' the world besides mysel. Every husband's no _henpecked_. Every man that has a wife doesna 'glory' in being 'pecked by _such_ a hen.'"
"There's William M'Gillavry," said the sly wife, in a soft and una.s.suming tone; "_he_ is independent o' his wife."
"Do ye mean, Peggy, that I should get him to sign the bill?"
"Na," replied she, "I dinna say that; I merely meant that he was an independent man like you, wha, if _ye asked_ him to do it, wouldna refuse on such a ground as the want o' consent o' his wife. Oh, what will my puir faither do? I canna live if he is in sorrow and perplexity." (Weeping.) "I saw William M'Gillavry yesterday. He asked kindly for ye. Ye haena visited him for a lang time. Twa husbands sae like each other might meet oftener, and twa wives, wha agree in the ae grand point o' submittin to the authority o' their lords and masters, might, wi' advantage, be greater gossips than we hae been."
"Might I try William, think ye, Margaret?" said he.
"My puir advice canna be o' muckle avail to ye," said she; "ye ken best yersel; but I think, _if_ he were asked, he wadna refuse the sma'
favour."
"I see you wish me to try him, Peggy," said he; "and I _will_ try him."
Away hastened the deacon to William M'Gillavry. He found him at home; and, as a deacon, was well received. Having opened the subject to him, he found that M'Gillavry was not inclined to become cautioner, unless he got put into his hands some security, that, in the event of his being called upon to pay the money, he might, in the end, be safe.
This proposition was not expected by the deacon, who did not possess any portable security that he could give. He endeavoured to get his friend to be satisfied with his own obligation, to keep him scatheless against all the effects of his obligation; but the other would not agree to this, and, pretending to be called away by some one, left the room for a little, promising to be back instantly. In the meantime, the deacon heard a conflict of words in an adjoining apartment, in the course of which several half-sentences met his ear. The wordy war was between William M'Gillavry and his wife. Her notes were shrill and high, and repeatedly she said--"Get my brither John's bill frae him"--"that will do"--"he, puir fallow! canna pay't, at ony rate, and I want to save him frae the hands o' the law." The deacon did not understand this broken conversation; but he could easily perceive that his friend was taking the advice of his wife. The words of old Fleming's ballad of evil wives came into his mind:--
"An evil wyfe is the werst aught That ony man can haif, For he may never sit in saught Onless he be her sklaif."
As he muttered the last words, forgetful of his own case, his friend entered.
"My wife's brither," said he, "has a bill in your corporation's box for 250. You can impledge that in my hands, and I'll sign yer father-in-law's security."
"The corporation's property's no mine," answered the deacon; "I hae, besides, nae power owre't; the bill's i' the box, and Mr Andrew Todd has the key."
"I ken that," replied the other (who was a dishonest man), with a knowing wink; "but ye can easily get haud o' the paper, and I'll gie ye a back letter that I winna use't unless I'm obliged to pay yer father-in-law's debt. Naebody will ever hear o't."
The proposition did not altogether please the deacon, who, though very far from being an upright man, did not care about his frailty being known to another. He said he would think of what had pa.s.sed between them, and came away. His wife, when he came home, was waiting in the greatest anxiety. Her father had called in the meantime, and told her, that, if he did not get the bill immediately, with two good names upon it, he would be put in jail. This alarmed his daughter, who, if she could save her father, cared little for the ruin of her husband. She heard with deep anguish the announcement of another disappointment.
Having been weeping before he came in, her eyes were red and swollen, and the bad intelligence again struck the fountain of her tears, and made her weep and moan bitterly. The deacon was moved at the picture of distress. He had not told her William M'Gillavry's proposition, but only simply that he had refused, unless adequate security were put into his hands. His wife's grief wrung from him every satisfaction he could bestow; for he could not stand and witness the sorrow of his tender and obedient partner, while there remained any chance of ameliorating her anguish.
"There is ae way, Peggy, o' gettin this affair managed," said he, at last.
"What is that?" said she, looking up, and throwing back her curls, which, amidst all her grief, were never forgot.
"William M'Gillavry's wife's brother," said he, "is awin our corporation 250; and his bill for that sum is in our corporation box.
He says he would sign the bill to your father, if I gave him his brother-in-law's bill to hauld in security; but I'm no quite sure if that wad be honest."
"Thae things lie far out o' a weak woman's way," said she. "We haena the power o' mind possessed by you men; but, if I were ent.i.tled to speak a word on the subject, I would say there was nae dishonesty whar there was nae wrang. Ye ken the signin o' my faither's bill's a mere form; and, if William M'Gillavry's brither-in-law's bill were taen out the box, it would just be put back again. Correct me, my dear Murdoch, if ye think me wrang."
"I dinna think ye're far wrang, Peggy," said the deacon; "but how is William M'Gillavry's brither-in-law's bill to be got out o' our corporation box? There's the difficulty--and I needna ask a woman how that's to be got owre."
"Na, Murdoch--ye needna ask me that question," replied the wife. "It's far beyond the reach o' my puir brain; but, if it's in the power o'
ony mortal man to say how a difficulty o' that kind's to be mastered, it is in that o' Murdoch Waldie. Maybe ye may gie't a cast through yer powerfu mind. Oh! if ye saw my distract.i.t faither! He left me just as you cam in, wi' the tears o' sorrow rinnin doun his auld cheeks. Will ye think o't, my dear Murdoch?" (embracing him) "What's weel intended canna be wrang; and what's planned by a mind like yours canna fail."
"I couldna get the key frae Andrew Todd," said the gratified deacon, "unless I told him an untruth."
"A lee for guid has been justified," said the wife. "Rahab was approved for hiding the spies, and denyin their presence; but I couldna ask ye to imitate Rahab. I hae nae richt to dictate to my husband."
"But wouldna ye _wish_ me, my dear Peggy, to stretch a point to get yer faither's tears dried up, and yer ain stopped? Dinna hesitate, Peggy--speak yer mind bauldly--I'll forgie ye."
"Ou ay," whimpered the gentle dame. "If Rahab was justified, sae will Murdoch Waldie be forgiven."
"Weel--I'll try the boxmaster again," said the deacon.
Next day, accordingly, he threw himself in the way of Mr Andrew Todd.
The boxmaster had been in the corporation hall, and was returning home to deposit the key of the box in the place where he kept it. The deacon got him inveigled into a public-house, where, when they had seated themselves, he saw that Mr Todd was blus.h.i.+ng scarlet, doubtless at the recollection of the scene that had taken place the day before.
"Ye needna be ashamed, Andrew," said the deacon, "at the conduct of Mrs Jean Todd. _Ye_ werena to blame--I a.s.soilzie ye. Think nae mair o't. You can just sign a fresh bill. I'll buy the stamp round the corner at d.i.c.kson's, and we can draw it out here."
"I beg yer pardon," replied Andrew; "I maunna get into that sc.r.a.pe again. I'll never resist the authority o' Mrs Jean Todd mair on earth. To her I owe my boxmasters.h.i.+p--my trade--my status--my health--my happiness--and a' that's worth livin for in this evil warld; and she will never hae it to say again, that I'm no gratefu for the care she taks o' me, and the love she bears to me. Let the warld say, if they like, that I am henpecked--I dinna care."
"Weel, weel," replied the deacon; "we were speakin o' bills. Are ye quite sure that ye haena allowed the days o' grace in Templeton's bill to expire? There's indorsers there; and if it is as I suspect, ye've lost recourse, and may be liable for the debt."
"Mercy on us!" cried the terrified Andrew. "It's impossible. Dinna say't. Let me count." (Using his fingers). "Count, deacon--count, man."
"I think we had better see the bill itsel," cried the deacon. "Where's the key?"
"Here it is," replied the simple boxmaster, taking it out.
"Give it to me," said the deacon, taking it out of Andrew's hand; "we'll sune see if the bill's past due."
Waldie hurried out of the room, telling Andrew, as he went out, that he would come back, and inform him how the fact stood. The mind of the boxmaster was now too much occupied about the danger of having allowed the days of grace to pa.s.s without intimation to the indorsers on the bill, to have any s.p.a.ce left for doubting the honesty of the deacon.
The suspicion of having been cajoled never approached him; he sat and sipped the liquor that lay before him, occupied all the time in a brown study, with the thought continually rising--"What will Mrs Jean Todd say to my stupidity, in making myself responsible for the amount of Templeton's bill? It will ruin me; and a' her care and prudence will in an instant be scattered to the winds." He still sat, expecting the deacon to return with the required information. Half-an-hour pa.s.sed, and no deacon came; but a messenger came with a note, stating that all was quite safe, and that, as something had occurred to prevent the writer from returning to the tavern, he had sent that intelligence, to ease his mind, and that he would return the key in the course of the day. Andrew's mind was relieved by this statement; he paid the tavern-keeper for the liquor, and went away, to resume his ordinary occupations.
At dinner-time he went home; and, during the meal, he began talking again about Deacon Waldie.
"After a'," said he, "he is a guid cratur, the deacon. After the usage he got here last nicht, wha could hae thocht he wad hae taen ony interest in my affairs?"
"Ye dinna require an a.s.sistant," replied Mrs Jean Todd, "sae lang as I live."
"That's true," replied Andrew; "but the deacon has dune for me what ye couldna hae dune."
"What is that?" inquired the wife.