Babyproofing Your Marriage Part 21

Chapter 1: How Did We Get Here? Here?.

1. Jay Belsky and John Kelly, The Transition to Parenthood: How a First Child The Transition to Parenthood: How a First Child Changes a Marriage ( Changes a Marriage ( Delacorte Press, 1994). Delacorte Press, 1994).

2 . . Alyson F. Shapiro and John M. Gottman Alyson F. Shapiro and John M. Gottman , , "Effects on Marriage of a Psycho-Communicative-Educational Intervention With Couples Undergoing the Transition to Parenthood, Evaluation at 1-Year Post Intervention," "Effects on Marriage of a Psycho-Communicative-Educational Intervention With Couples Undergoing the Transition to Parenthood, Evaluation at 1-Year Post Intervention,"

Journal of Family Communication (2005):124 (2005):124 3. R.J. Evenson and R.W. Simon, "Clarifying the Relations.h.i.+p Between Parenthood and Depression," Journal of Health and Social Behavior Journal of Health and Social Behavior, 46, (December 2005): 34158.

Chapter 2: Baby . . . Boom!.

1. F.M. DeLeon, "Rocking the Cradle-and a Marriage-After D-Day: Programs for Parenthood," The Seattle Times The Seattle Times, October 24, 1999. (p. 31) John Gottman, Alyson Shapiro, and Sybil Carrere, " " The Baby and the Marriage: Identifying Factors that Buffer Against Decline in Marital Satisfaction After the First baby Arrives," The Baby and the Marriage: Identifying Factors that Buffer Against Decline in Marital Satisfaction After the First baby Arrives," Journal of Family Psychology, Journal of Family Psychology, 14 (1), (March 2000): 5970. 14 (1), (March 2000): 5970.

John Gray, Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus: A Practical Guide for Improving Communication and Getting What You Want in Your Relations.h.i.+ps for Improving Communication and Getting What You Want in Your Relations.h.i.+ps (HarperCollins, 1992). (HarperCollins, 1992).

Chapter 3: What's the Score?.

1. This MSNBC survey results are cited by Courtney Ronan in an article t.i.tled "Divvying Up Those Dreaded Household Ch.o.r.es," The Realty Times The Realty Times, June 16, 1999.

2. John M. Gottman, and Nan Silver. "Coping with Typical Solvable Prob-288 Endnotes lems," in The Seven Principles for Making Marriages Work The Seven Principles for Making Marriages Work (Three Rivers Press, 2000), Chap. 9. (Three Rivers Press, 2000), Chap. 9.

3. Katya Adder, "Housework Looms for Spanish Men." BBC News. June 17, 2005. http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/4100140.stm.

4. "John Leguizamo: One-Man Firebrand," Psychology Today Psychology Today (March-April 2005): 49. (March-April 2005): 49.

Chapter 4: The s.e.x Life of New Parents.

1. Robert Wright, The Moral Animal The Moral Animal (First Vintage Books, 1995) p. 41. (First Vintage Books, 1995) p. 41.

2. Sean Elder, "The Emperor's New Woes," Psychology Today Psychology Today (March-April 2005): 44. (March-April 2005): 44.

3. Kathleen Deveny (with Holly Peterson, Pat Wingert, Karen Springen, Julie Scelfo, Melissa Brewster, Tara Weingarten and Joan Raymond), "We're Not in the Mood," Newsweek Newsweek, June 2003.

4. Kathleen Deveny (with Holly Peterson, Pat Wingert, Karen Springen, Julie Scelfo, Melissa Brewster, Tara Weingarten and Joan Raymond), "We're Not in the Mood," Newsweek Newsweek, June 2003.

Chapter 6: Ramping Up and Giving In.

1. "What is the Ideal Family Size?" survey (results as of July 9, 2006) http:// www.babycenter.com.

2. Center for the Ethnography of Everyday Life.

3. Arthur Norton and Louisa Miller, "Marriage, Divorce, and Remarriage in the 1990s," U.S. Bureau of the Census, Current Population Reports, 1992. U.S. Bureau of the Census, Current Population Reports, 1992.

Barbara Foley Wilson and Sally Cunningham Clarke, "Remarriages: A De-mographic Profi le," Journal of Family Issues 13 Journal of Family Issues 13 (1992): 123-141. (1992): 123-141.

"s.e.x in America: A Defi nitive Survey," The New York Times The New York Times, August 4, 1998 (University of Chicago Press, 1995).

Chapter 7: Balancing Priorities.

1. Mark Cleary, "The Awful Truth about Parenthood." The Age The Age, February 7, 2005, http://www.theage.com.au/news/Opinion/The-awful-truth-about-parenthood/2005/02/06/1107625057169.html.

2. Stephen R. Covey, A. Roger Merrill and Rebecca R. Merrill. First Things First Things First: To Live, to Love, to Learn, to Leave a Legacy First: To Live, to Love, to Learn, to Leave a Legacy (Free Press, 1996). (Free Press, 1996).

3. Miranda Hitti, "Recipe for Happiness in Marriage," Web MD Medical News Web MD Medical News, March 22, 2005. http://www.webmd.com/content/article/102/106708.htm.

Cited research conducted by Nick Powdthavee at University of Warwick, Coventry, England.

4. Anne Lamont, writer and mother.

5. U.S. Census 2005. Median age for first marriage for women: 25.8 years, Endnotes 289.

for men: 27.1 years. National Center for Health Statistics, National Vital National Vital Statistics Reports Statistics Reports 52(3) (September 18, 2003). Average male/female life expectancy in U.S. is 77 years (as of 2002). 52(3) (September 18, 2003). Average male/female life expectancy in U.S. is 77 years (as of 2002).

6. E. McGrath, G.P. Keita, B.R. Stickland, and N.F. Russo, Women and Depression: Risk Factors and Treatment Issues (American Psychological a.s.sociation, 1990).

7. Study by University of Chicago sociologist Linda Waite reported in, Tif-fany Kary, "Don't Divorce, Be Happy: Miserable Unions That Morph Into Wedded Bliss," Psychology Today Psychology Today (November-December 2002). (November-December 2002).

About the Authors Stacie c.o.c.krell, Cathy O'Neill, and Julia Stone are wives, mothers, and good friends, muddling through the early parenting years together.

Stacie c.o.c.krell was a finance and marketing professional at Dell, Inc., and cofounded a high-tech company before becoming a full-time mother.

Cathy O'Neill, who is from Dublin, Ireland, is an attorney who now works as a management consultant. Julia Stone is a former product manager in the educational services field also turned stay-at-home mom. Among them, they have seven kids, the oldest of whom just started kindergarten.

They each had a second (or third) baby while they wrote this book. They don't recommend combining the two experiences.

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