The Works of Lord Byron Volume VI Part 51

LXXII.

"Cut off a thousand heads, before----"--"Now, pray,"

Replied the other, "do not interrupt: You put me out in what I had to say.

Sir!--as I said, as soon as I have supped, I shall perpend if your proposal may Be such as I can properly accept; Provided always your great goodness still Remits the matter to our own free-will."

LXXIII.

Baba eyed Juan, and said, "Be so good As dress yourself--" and pointed out a suit In which a Princess with great pleasure would Array her limbs; but Juan standing mute, As not being in a masquerading mood, Gave it a slight kick with his Christian foot; And when the old negro told him to "Get ready,"

Replied, "Old gentleman, I'm not a lady."

LXXIV.

"What you may be, I neither know nor care,"

Said Baba; "but pray do as I desire: I have no more time nor many words to spare."

"At least," said Juan, "sure I may inquire The cause of this odd travesty?"--"Forbear,"

Said Baba, "to be curious; 't will transpire, No doubt, in proper place, and time, and season: I have no authority to tell the reason."

LXXV.

"Then if I do," said Juan, "I'll be----"--"Hold!"

Rejoined the negro, "pray be not provoking; This spirit's well, but it may wax too bold, And you will find us not too fond of joking."

"What, sir!" said Juan, "shall it e'er be told That I uns.e.xed my dress?" But Baba, stroking The things down, said, "Incense me, and I call Those who will leave you of no s.e.x at all.

LXXVI.

"I offer you a handsome suit of clothes: A woman's, true; but then there is a cause Why you should wear them."--"What, though my soul loathes The effeminate garb?"--thus, after a short pause, Sighed Juan, muttering also some slight oaths, "What the devil shall I do with all this gauze?"

Thus he profanely termed the finest lace Which e'er set off a marriage-morning face.

LXXVII.

And then he swore; and, sighing, on he slipped A pair of trousers of flesh-coloured silk;[ff]

Next with a virgin zone he was equipped, Which girt a slight chemise as white as milk; But tugging on his petticoat, he tripped, Which--as we say--or as the Scotch say, _whilk_.[295]

(The rhyme obliges me to this; sometimes Monarchs are less imperative than rhymes)--[fg]

LXXVIII.

Whilk, which (or what you please), was owing to His garment's novelty, and his being awkward: And yet at last he managed to get through His toilet, though no doubt a little backward: The negro Baba helped a little too, When some untoward part of raiment stuck hard; And, wrestling both his arms into a gown, He paused, and took a survey up and down.

LXXIX.

One difficulty still remained--his hair Was hardly long enough; but Baba found So many false long tresses all to spare, That soon his head was most completely crowned, After the manner then in fas.h.i.+on there; And this addition with such gems was bound As suited the _ensemble_ of his toilet, While Baba made him comb his head and oil it.

Lx.x.x.

And now being femininely all arrayed, With some small aid from scissors, paint, and tweezers, He looked in almost all respects a maid,[fh]

And Baba smilingly exclaimed, "You see, sirs, A perfect transformation here displayed; And now, then, you must come along with me, sirs, That is--the Lady:" clapping his hands twice, Four blacks were at his elbow in a trice.

Lx.x.xI.

"You, sir," said Baba, nodding to the one, "Will please to accompany those gentlemen To supper; but you, worthy Christian nun, Will follow me: no trifling, sir; for when I say a thing, it must at once be done.

What fear you? think you this a lion's den?

Why, 't is a palace; where the truly wise Antic.i.p.ate the Prophet's paradise.

Lx.x.xII.

"You fool! I tell you no one means you harm."

"So much the better," Juan said, "for them; Else they shall feel the weight of this my arm, Which is not quite so light as you may deem.

I yield thus far; but soon will break the charm, If any take me for that which I seem: So that I trust for every body's sake, That this disguise may lead to no mistake."

Lx.x.xIII.

"Blockhead! come on, and see," quoth Baba; while Don Juan, turning to his comrade, who Though somewhat grieved, could scarce forbear a smile Upon the metamorphosis in view,-- "Farewell!" they mutually exclaimed: "this soil Seems fertile in adventures strange and new; One's turned half Mussulman, and one a maid, By this old black enchanter's unsought aid."

Lx.x.xIV.

"Farewell!" said Juan: "should we meet no more, I wish you a good appet.i.te."--"Farewell!"

Replied the other; "though it grieves me sore: When we next meet, we'll have a tale to tell: We needs must follow when Fate puts from sh.o.r.e.

Keep your good name; though Eve herself once fell."

"Nay," quoth the maid, "the Sultan's self shan't carry me, Unless his Highness promises to marry me."

Lx.x.xV.

And thus they parted, each by separate doors; Baba led Juan onward, room by room, Through glittering galleries, and o'er marble floors, Till a gigantic portal through the gloom, Haughty and huge, along the distance lowers; And wafted far arose a rich perfume: It seemed as though they came upon a shrine, For all was vast, still, fragrant, and divine.

Lx.x.xVI.

The giant door was broad, and bright, and high, Of gilded bronze, and carved in curious guise; Warriors thereon were battling furiously; Here stalks the victor, there the vanquished lies; There captives led in triumph droop the eye, And in perspective many a squadron flies: It seems the work of times before the line Of Rome transplanted fell with Constantine.

Lx.x.xVII.

This ma.s.sy portal stood at the wide close Of a huge hall, and on its either side Two little dwarfs, the least you could suppose, Were sate, like ugly imps, as if allied In mockery to the enormous gate which rose O'er them in almost pyramidic pride: The gate so splendid was in all its _features_,[296]

You never thought about those little creatures,

Lx.x.xVIII.

Until you nearly trod on them, and then You started back in horror to survey The wondrous hideousness of those small men, Whose colour was not black, nor white, nor grey, But an extraneous mixture, which no pen Can trace, although perhaps the pencil may; They were mis-shapen pigmies, deaf and dumb-- Monsters, who cost a no less monstrous sum.

Lx.x.xIX.

Their duty was--for they were strong, and though They looked so little, did strong things at times-- To ope this door, which they could really do, The hinges being as smooth as Rogers' rhymes; And now and then, with tough strings of the bow, As is the custom of those Eastern climes, To give some rebel Pacha a cravat-- For mutes are generally used for that.

XC.

They spoke by signs--that is, not spoke at all; And looking like two Incubi, they glared As Baba with his fingers made them fall To heaving back the portal folds: it scared Juan a moment, as this pair so small, With shrinking serpent optics on him stared;[297]

It was as if their little looks could poison Or fascinate whome'er they fixed their eyes on.

XCI.