The Beggar's Opera Part 3

You Baggage! you Hussy! you inconsiderate Jade! had you been hang'd, it would not have vex'd me, for that might have been your Misfortune; but to do such a mad thing by Choice; The Wench is married, Husband.

_Peachum._ Married! the Captain is a bold Man, and will risk any thing for Money; to be sure he believes her a Fortune. Do you think your Mother and I should have liv'd comfortably so long together, if ever we had been married? Baggage!

_Mrs. Peachum._ I knew she was always a proud s.l.u.t; and now the Wench hath play'd the Fool and Married, because forsooth she would do like the Gentry. Can you support the Expence of a Husband, Hussy, in Gaming, Drinking and Whoring? Have you Money enough to carry on the daily Quarrels of Man and Wife about who shall squander most? There are not many Husbands and Wives, who can bear the Charges of plaguing one another in a handsom way. If you must be married, could you introduce no body into our Family but a Highwayman? Why, thou foolish Jade, thou wilt be as ill-us'd, and as much neglected, as if thou hadst married a Lord!

_Peachum._ Let not your Anger, my Dear, break through the Rules of Decency, for the Captain looks upon himself in the Military Capacity, as a Gentleman by his Profession. Besides what he hath already, I know he is in a fair way of getting, or of dying; and both these ways, let me tell you, are most excellent Chances for a Wife. Tell me, Hussy, are you ruin'd or no?

_Mrs. Peachum._ With _Polly's_ Fortune, she might very well have gone off to a Person of Distinction. Yes, that you might, you pouting s.l.u.t!

_Peachum._ What is the Wench dumb? Speak, or I'll make you plead by squeezing out an Answer from you. Are you really bound Wife to him, or are you only upon liking? [Pinches her.

_Polly._ Oh! [Screaming.

_Mrs. Peachum._ How the Mother is to be pitied who hath handsom Daughters! Locks, Bolts, Bars, and Lectures of Morality are nothing to them: They break through them all. They have as much Pleasure in cheating a Father and Mother, as in cheating at Cards.

_Peachum._ Why, _Polly_, I shall soon know if you are married, by _Macheath's_ keeping from our House.

AIR VIII. Grim King of the Ghosts, &c.

[Music]

_Polly._ Can Love be control'd by Advice?

Will _Cupid_ our Mothers obey?

Though my Heart were as frozen as Ice, At his Flame 'twould have melted away.

When he kist me so closely he prest, 'Twas so sweet that I must have comply'd: So I thought it both safest and best To marry, for fear you should chide.

_Mrs. Peachum._ Then all the Hopes of our Family are gone for ever and ever!

_Peachum._ And _Macheath_ may hang his Father and Mother-in-law, in hope to get into their Daughter's Fortune.

_Polly._ I did not marry him (as 'tis the Fas.h.i.+on) coolly and deliberately for Honour or Money. But, I love him.

_Mrs. Peachum._ Love him! worse and worse! I thought the Girl had been better bred. Oh Husband, Husband! her Folly makes me mad! my Head swims!

I'm distracted! I can't support myself-- Oh! [Faints.

_Peachum._ See, Wench, to what a Condition you have reduc'd your poor Mother! a Gla.s.s of Cordial, this instant. How the poor Woman takes it to heart!

[_Polly_ goes out, and returns with it.

Ah, Hussy, now this is the only Comfort your Mother has left!

_Polly._ Give her another Gla.s.s, Sir! my Mama drinks double the Quant.i.ty whenever she is out of Order. This, you see, fetches her.

_Mrs. Peachum._ The Girl shews such a Readiness, and so much Concern, that I could almost find in my Heart to forgive her.

AIR IX. O _Jenny_, O _Jenny_, where hast thou been.

[Music]

O _Polly_, you might have toy'd and kist.

By keeping Men off, you keep them on.

_Polly._ But he so teaz'd me, And he so pleas'd me, What I did, you must have done.

_Mrs. Peachum._ Not with a Highwayman. --You sorry s.l.u.t!

_Peachum._ A Word with you, Wife. 'Tis no new thing for a Wench to take Man without Consent of Parents. You know 'tis the Frailty of Women, my Dear.

_Mrs. Peachum._ Yes, indeed, the s.e.x is frail. But the first time a Woman is frail, she should be somewhat nice methinks, for then or never is the time to make her Fortune. After that, she hath nothing to do but to guard herself from being found out, and she may do what she pleases.

_Peachum._ Make yourself a little easy; I have a Thought shall soon set all Matters again to rights. Why so melancholy, _Polly_? since what is done cannot be undone, we must all endeavour to make the best of it.

_Mrs. Peachum._ Well, _Polly_; as far as one Woman can forgive another, I forgive thee. --Your Father is too fond of you, Hussy.

_Polly._ Then all my Sorrows are at an end.

_Mrs. Peachum._ A mighty likely Speech in troth, for a Wench who is just married!

AIR X. _Thomas_, I cannot, &c.

[Music]

_Polly._ I, like a s.h.i.+p in Storms, was tost; Yet afraid to put in to Land: For seiz'd in the Port the Vessel's lost, Whose Treasure is contreband.

The Waves are laid, My Duty's paid.

O Joy beyond Expression!

Thus, safe a-sh.o.r.e, I ask no more, My All is in my Possession.

_Peachum._ I hear Customers in t'other Room: Go, talk with 'em, _Polly_; but come to us again, as soon as they are gone. --But, hark ye, Child, if 'tis the Gentleman who was here Yesterday about the Repeating Watch; say, you believe we can't get Intelligence of it 'till to-morrow. For I lent it to _Suky Straddle_, to make a figure with it to-night at a Tavern in _Drury-Lane_. If t'other Gentleman calls for the Silver-hilted Sword; you know _Beetle-brow'd Jemmy_ hath it on, and he doth not come from _Tunbridge_ 'till _Tuesday_ Night; so that it cannot be had 'till then.

[Exit _Polly_.

_Peachum._ Dear Wife, be a little pacified, Don't let your Pa.s.sion run away with your Senses. _Polly_, I grant you, hath done a rash thing.

_Mrs. Peachum._ If she had only an Intrigue with the Fellow, why the very best Families have excus'd and huddled up a Frailty of that sort.

'Tis Marriage, Husband, that makes it a Blemish.

_Peachum._ But Money, Wife, is the true Fuller's Earth for Reputations, there is not a Spot or a Stain but what it can take out. A rich Rogue now-a-days is fit Company for any Gentleman; and the World, my Dear, hath not such a Contempt for Roguery as you imagine. I tell you, Wife, I can make this Match turn to our Advantage.

_Mrs. Peachum._ I am very sensible, Husband, that Captain _Macheath_ is worth Money, but I am in doubt whether he hath not two or three Wives already, and then if he should die in a Session or two, _Polly's_ Dower would come into Dispute.

_Peachum._ That, indeed, is a Point which ought to be consider'd.

AIR XI. A Soldier and a Sailor.

[Music]