Diary of John Manningham Part 36

_Qui in os laudatur, in corde flagellatur._

I heard that about this last Christmas the Lady Effingham,[162] as shee was playing at shuttlec.o.c.ke, upon a suddein felt hir selfe somewhatt, and presently retiring hir selfe into a chamber was brought to bed of a child without a midwife, shee never suspecting that shee had bin with child.

[Footnote 162: The lady pointed at by this anecdote was Anne daughter and heir of John Lord St. John of Bletsoe, married to William Lord Howard of Effingham, eldest son of Charles Earl of Nottingham, on 7th Feb. 1597-8 (Faulkner's Chelsea, ii. 124, where the lady is inaccurately termed "Agneta"). There is mention in Faulkner of the baptism of a daughter Anne on 12th October 1605, but no allusion to the child who is said by our diarist to have come so unceremoniously into the world.]

The play at shuttlec.o.c.ke is become soe muche in request at Court, that the making shuttlec.o.c.kes is almost growne a trade in London.

_Praestat otiosum esse quam nihil agere._

[Sidenote: fo. 99^b.

13 Feb. 1602.]

AT PAULES,

A yong man made a finicall boysterous exordium, and rann himselfe out almost dry before he was halfe through; his text; "He humbled himselfe to the death, even to the death of the crosse, wherefore G.o.d hath glorified him." He spake much of humility. _Melior est peccator humilis, quam superbus justus. Peccare non potest nisi superbus, nec penitere nisi humilis._ He first dilated of three meanes to knowe G.o.d; by his greatnes, by the prophets in the old, by his sonne in the newe Testament. Against pride in beauty; the diuel playes the sophister whiles he perswades women to paint that they may seeme fayrer than they are; which painting being discovered, makes them to be thought fouler than they are. Pride in apparell is pride of our shame, for it was made to cover it, and as yf one should embroyder a sheete wherein he had done pennaunce, and shewe it in bragging manner. It is said by some that St.

John Baptist for his humility is rewarded with the place which the diuel lost for his pride.

He spake against duellisme, or single combat, and said that yf two goe into the field with purpose to fight an the one be slayne, he is a murderour of himselfe. He exhorted the judges to severity, telling them that there is more incouragement taken by one that escapes the punishment due unto him by the lawe, then there is feare wrought by the execution of an hundred.

[Sidenote: fo. 100.

13 Feb. 1602.]

In the afternoone MR. CLAPHAM, at his Churche by Paules Wharf.

Text, Gen. iv. 13. "Then Kain said to the Lord or Jehovah, My punishment is greater then I can beare, &c." but he reade it "My synne is greater then can be concealed." He noted that translators did very ill to foyst their inventions into the text and sett the originall in the margent, as commonly the common translacions have "synne" in the margent for the word "punishment" in the text, as grosse an absurdity as yf one should shutt the master out of dores, and give entertainement to his attendants.

[Sidenote: fo. 100^b.

1 Feb. 1602.]

Nowe Kayne was prest with the horror of his synn he confesseth, but with a kinde of desperacion and repining, as Judas when he confest and hanged himselfe. If a man will not confesse his faultes he shall be prest till he confesse, and when his confession comes to late he may confesse and be hanged to, well enough. For repentant confession must come while grace is offered, while it is called to-day. G.o.d deales as the debtor which tenders his money till sunne goe downe. When night is come, up goes his money and a fig for his creditor. Yf men take not tyme while grace is offered, but delay till the sunne of grace be gonne downe, there remaines nothing but horrible desperat reprobacion. A vagabond; an excommunicate person is a vagabond, turned out of the society of G.o.ds Churche both here in earth, and in heaven too, yf it were done by the Spirit of Christ; and therefore lett not men soe lightly esteeme of this greate censure, nor thinke to excuse themselves by saying it was for trifles; but lett them take heede they deserve it not, and yf they which gave the sentence abused their authority, lett them aunswere for it, but always the censure is to [be] reverently regarded.

Ther be pasport-makers that are as verry rogues as any justice rogues, n.o.ble rogues; all that live out of the communion of the Churche are noe better than rogues and vagabonds in the eye [?] of G.o.d.

[Sidenote: fo. 101.

15 Feb. 1602.]

_Paradox. That paynting is lawefull._ Fowlenes is loathesome; can it be soe that helpes it? What thou lovest most in hir face is colour, and this painting gives that; but thou hatest it, not because it is, but because thou knowest it is. Foole, whom ignorance only maketh happie.

Love hir whoe shewes greate love to the by taking this paynes to seeme lovely to thee.

_Hee that weepeth is most wise._ Wee come first unwitting, weeping and crying, into a world of woe, and shall wee not weepe and cry when wee knowe it?

The Reason of Reasons was seene divers tymes to weepe, but never to laugh.

Art thou a synner? Wilt thou repent? Weepe. Art thou poore? Wouldst thou be relieved? Weepe. Hast thou broken the lawes of thy prince? Hast thou deserued death? Wouldst thou be pittyed? Wouldst thou liue? Weepe. Hast thou injured thy friend? Wilt thou be reconciled? Weepe.

_Laughinge is the greatest signe of wisdome. Ride, si sapis, O puella, ride._ Yf thou be wise laugh, for sith the powers of discourse and reason and laughinge be equally proper to only man, why shall not he be most wise that hath most use of laughing, as well as he that hath most use of reasoning and discoursing? I have seene men laugh soe long and soe ernestly that they have wept at last, because they could weepe [laugh?] noe more. Laugh at a foolish gallant; soe shall he be knowne a man, because he laughs; a wise man, for he knowes what he laughs at; and valiant, that he dares laugh.

[Sidenote: fo. 101^b.

15 Feb. 1602.]

_To keepe sheepe, the best lyfe._ The Lyfe of Man was soe affected to this lyfe, that he denyed not to crowne his deity with this t.i.tle: and by this he directed his especiall charge to his especiall disciple: giving us men this best name of a beast, of the best nature of beastes.

They are innocent, they are patient, soe would G.o.d have man; they love and live together, soe would G.o.d have man. G.o.d made thee to behold the Heaven, and to meditate the wonders thereof; make thyselfe a shepheard, and thou art still beholding, still meditating. G.o.d commaundes thee to forsake the world: yf thou art a shepheard thou dost soe, thou withdrawest thyselfe from the world. The private lyfe is the sweetest lyfe; yf thou livest the lyfe of a shepheard, thou livest the sweetest private. Wilt thou be a king? Be a shepheard, thou hast subjects, thou hast obedient subjects, thou hast sheepe, thou hast a scepter, thou hast a crooke; thy fold is thy counsell chamber, and the greene field thy flouris.h.i.+ng pallace. Thy companions are the sunne, the moone, and the stars, of whom thou makest continuall use, and from the vieue of their lights receyvest thy counsell and advise. Thou art more happie then other kings, thou art freed from hate and soe from feare, thou reignest quietly, and rulest securely; thou hast but one enemie, and thou hast an enemy for that enemie, the dog and wolf. He that was G.o.ds second best beloved was a shepheard and a king; yf thou art a shepheard thou art a king, thou art happie, nay thou art most happie, thou art a happie king, thy subiectes living onely to lengthen thy life, and to shorten their owne, &c.

[Sidenote: fo. 102.

Feb. 1602.]

One fee is too good for a bad lawyer, and two fees too little for a good one.

Hee that will love a man he knowes not why, will hate him though he knowe not wherefore.

When Sir Edward Hobby heard of Sir Henry Nevils disaster with the Earl of Ess.e.x, he said that his cosen Nevil was ambling towardes his preferment, and would needes gallop in all the hast, and soe stumbled and fell. (_Ch. Davers._)

The Bishop of Bath and Wells,[163] being sent for to the Court and there offered the Bishop.r.i.c.ke of Ely upon some condicions which he thought inconvenient, he said that Bishop.r.i.c.ke was the onely mayden Bishop.r.i.c.ke in England, and he would not be the first should deflour it. (_Hooper._)

[Footnote 163: Dr. John Still, who had been Master of Trinity College, Cambridge, was Bishop of Bath and Wells from 1592 to 1607-8.]

One being entreated to part a man and his wife that were togither by the eares, "Nay," quoth he, "I will never part man and wife while I live."

Dr. Rud made a sermon before the Queene upon the text, "I sayd yee are G.o.ds, but you shall all dy like men;" wherein he made such a discourse of death that hir Majestie, when his sermon was ended, said unto him, "Mr. Dr. you have made me a good funerall sermon, I may dye when I will."

Giue the way to any that you meete; yf he have a better horse it is duty, yf a worse in pity; yf the way be fayre you are in, commonly it is foule hard by, and soe you shall haue power to durty him that you giue the way, not he you. (_Burdett._)

Yf you put a case in the first bookes of the lawe to the auncients, you may presume they may haue forgotten it; yf in the newe bookes, you may doubt whether they haue reade it. (_Bur_[_dett._])