The Old Debauchees. A Comedy Part 7

_Isa._ I cannot say I did.

_Mart._ Hum! Spirits have their own Times of Operation; which must be diligently watch'd for. Perhaps your good Genius was at that Time otherwise employ'd. Repeat the Ceremony often, and my Life on the Success. Let me see, about an Hour hence will be a very good Season. Be ready to receive him, and I firmly believe, the Spirit will come to you.

_Isa._ Oh lud! Father, I shall be frightned out of my Wits at the Sight of a Spirit.

_Mart._ You will see nothing frightful, take my Word for it.

_Isa._ I hope he won't appear in any horrible Shape.

_Mart._ Hum--That is to be averted by _Ave Maries_. As this is a friendly Spirit, I dare say, you may prevail on him to take what Shape you please. Perhaps your Father, or if you cannot prevail for a Lay-man, I dare swear, you may at least, pray him into the Shape of your Confessor: and tho' I must suffer Pain on that Account, I am ready to undergo it for your Service.

_Isa._ I am infinitely obliged to my dear Father, I'll prepare my self for this vast Happiness, nothing shall be wanting on my Parr, I a.s.sure you.

_Mart._ And if any thing be wanting on mine, may I never say Ma.s.s again, or never be paid for Ma.s.ses I have not said. Either this Girl has extraordinary Simplicity, or what is more likely, extraordinary Cunning; she does not seem averse to my Kisses. Why should I not imagine she sees and approves my Design. Well, I'll say this for the s.e.x: Let a Man but invent any Excuse for the Sin, and they are all ready to undertake it.

How happy is a Priest,

Who can the blus.h.i.+ng Maid's Resistance smother, With Sin in one Hand, Pardon in the other.

ACT III. SCENE I.

SCENE, Isabel'_s_ _Apartment_.

_Young_ Laroon, Isabel.

_Young_ LAROON.

Perdition seize the Villain, may all the Torments of twenty Inquisitions wrack his Soul.

_Isa._ Act your Part well, and we shall not want his own Weapons against him.

_Yo. Lar._ Sure it is impossible he can intend it--

_Isa._ Shall I make the Experiment?

_Yo. Lar._ I shall never be able to forbear murdering him.

_Isa._ You shall promise not to commit any Violence, you know too well what wou'd be the Consequence of that. Let us sufficiently convict him, and leave his Punishment to the Law.

_Yo. Lar._ And I know too well what will be the Consequence of that.

There seems to be a Combination between Priests and Lawyers; the Lawyers are to save the Priests from Punishment for their Rogueries in this World, and the Priests the Lawyers in the next.

_Isa._ However, the same Law that screens him for having injured you, will punish you for having done Justice to him. [_Knocking at the Door._

_Isa._ Oh! Heavens! the Priest is at the Door. What shall we do?

_Yo. Lar._ d.a.m.n him: I'll stay here and confront him.

_Isa._ Oh! No, by no means: For once, I'll attack him in his own Way; so the Moment he opens the Door, do you run out and leave the rest to me.

[_She throws her self into a Chair, and shrieks._ _Young_ Laroon _overturns_ Martin.

SCENE II.

Martin, Isabel.

_Mart._ I am slain, I am overlaid, I am murdered. Oh! Daughter, Daughter, is this your patient Expectation of the Spirit?

_Isa._ It has been here: It has been here.

_Mart._ What has been here?

_Isa._ Oh! the Spirit, the Spirit. It has been here this half Hour, and just as you came in, it vanished away in a Clap of Thunder, and I thought would have taken the Room with it.

_Mart._ I thought it would have taken me with it, I am sure. Spirit indeed! There are abundance of such Spirits as these in _Toulon_. And pray, how have the Spirit and you employed your time this half Hour?

_Isa._ Oh! don't ask me: It is impossible to tell you.

_Mart._ Ay, 'tis needless too: for I can give a shrewd Guess. I suppose you like his Company.

_Isa._ Oh! so well! That I could wish he would visit me ten Times every Day.

_Mart._ Oh, Ho! And in the same Shape too.

_Isa._ Oh! I shou'd like him in any Shape, and I dare swear he'll come in any Shape too: For he is the purest, sweetest, most complaisant Spirit: I could have almost sworn it had been Mr. _Laroon_ himself.

_Mart._ Was there ever such a----

_Isa._ Nay, when it came in first, it behaved just like Mr. _Laroon_, and call'd it self by his Name; but when it found I did not answer a Word, it took me by the Hand, and cry'd, is it possible you can be angry with your _Laroon_! I answer'd not a Word; then it kissed me a hundred times; I said nothing still; it caught me in its Arms, and embrac'd me Pa.s.sionately; I still behaved as you commanded me, very pa.s.sive.

_Mart._ Oh! the Devil, the Devil! Was ever Man so caught. And did you never apprehend it to be Mr. _Laroon_ himself?

_Isa._ Heaven forbid, I should have suffered Mr. _Laroon_ in those Familiarities, which you order'd me to allow the Spirit.

_Mart._ I am caught indeed. d.a.m.n'd driveling Idiot! [_Aside._

_Isa._ But, dear Father, tell me, shall I not see it again quickly? For I long to see it again.

_Mart._ Oh! Yes, yes----

_Isa._ I long to see it in the dark (methinks) for you know, Father, one sees Spirits best in the dark.

_Mart._ Ay, ay, you'll see it in the dark, I warrant you; but be sure and behave as you did before.

_Isa._ And will he always behave as he did before, Father?