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"Ma cherie," she heard, "The Good G.o.d! Oh, the good--good G.o.d!--And Lord Coombe! Lord Coombe!"
Coombe had gone back to the house. Four men returned with him, two in plain clothes and two heavily-built policemen. They remained below, but Coombe went up the staircase with the swift lightness of a man of thirty.
He merely stood upon the threshold of the drawing-room. This was what he said, and his face was entirely white his eyes appalling.
"My coming back to speak to you is--superfluous--and the result of pure fury. I allow it to myself as mere shameless indulgence. More is known against you than this--things which have gone farther and fared worse. You are not young and you are facing years of life in prison. Your head will be shaved--your hands worn and blackened and your nails broken with the picking of oak.u.m. You will writhe in hopeless degradation until you are done for. You will have time, in the night blackness if of your cell, to remember--to see faces--to hear cries. Women such as you should learn what h.e.l.l on earth means. You will learn."
When he ended, the woman hung with her back to the wall she had staggered against, her mouth opening and shutting helplessly but letting forth no sound.
He took out an exquisitely fresh handkerchief and touched his forehead because it was damp. His eyes were still appalling, but his voice suddenly dropped and changed.
"I have allowed myself to feel like a madman," he said. "It has been a rich experience--good for such a soul as I own."
He went downstairs and walked home because his carriage had taken Robin and Mademoiselle back to the slice of a house.
CHAPTER XXIV
Von Hillern made no further calls on Mrs. Gareth-Lawless. His return to Berlin was immediate and Fraulein Hirsch came no more to give lessons in German. Later, Coombe learned from the mam with the steady, blunt-featured face, that she had crossed the Channel on a night boat not many hours after Von Hillern had walked away from Berford Place. The exact truth was that she had been miserably prowling about the adjacent streets, held in the neighbourhood by some self-torturing morbidness, half thwarted helpless pa.s.sion, half triumphing hatred of the young thing she had betrayed. Up and down the streets she had gone, round and round, wringing her lean fingers together and tasting on her lips the salt of tears which rolled down her cheeks--tears of torment and rage.
There was the bitterness of death in what, by a mere trick of chance, came about. As she turned a corner telling herself for the hundredth time that she must go home, she found herself face to face with a splendid figure swinging furiously along. She staggered at the sight of the tigerish rage in the white face she recognized with a gasp. It was enough merely to behold it. He had met with some disastrous humiliation!
As for him, the direct intervention of that Heaven whose special care he was, had sent him a woman to punish--which, so far, was at least one thing arranged as it should be. He knew so well how he could punish her with his mere contempt and displeasure--as he could lash a spaniel crawling at his feet. He need not deign to tell her what had happened, and he did not. He merely drew back and stood in stiff magnificence looking down at her.
"It is through some folly of yours," he dropped in a voice of vitriol. "Women are always foolish. They cannot hold their tongues or think clearly. Return to Berlin at once. You are not of those whose conduct I can commend to be trusted in the future."
He was gone before she could have spoken even if she had dared.
Sobbing gasps caught her breath as she stood and watched him striding pitilessly and superbly away with, what seemed to her abject soul, the swing and tread of a martial G.o.d. Her streaming tears tasted salt indeed. She might never see him again--even from a distance. She would be disgraced and flung aside as a blundering woman. She had obeyed his every word and done her straining best, as she had licked the dust at his feet--but he would never cast a glance at her in the future or utter to her the remotest word of his high commands. She so reeled as she went her wretched way that a good-natured policeman said to her as he pa.s.sed,
"Steady on, my girl. Best get home and go to bed."
To Mrs. Gareth-Lawless, it was stated by Coombe that Fraulein Hirsch had been called back to Germany by family complications.
That august orders should recall Count Von Hillern, was easily understood. Such magnificent persons never shone upon society for any length of time.
That Feather had been making a country home visit when her daughter had faced tragedy was considered by Lord Coombe as a fortunate thing.
"We will not alarm Mrs. Gareth-Lawless by telling her what has occurred," he said to Mademoiselle Valle. "What we most desire is that no one shall suspect that the hideous thing took place. A person who was forgetful or careless might, unintentionally, let some word escape which--"
What he meant, and what Mademoiselle Valle knew he meant--also what he knew she knew he meant--was that a woman, who was a heartless fool, without sympathy or perception, would not have the delicacy to feel that the girl must be s.h.i.+elded, and might actually see a sort of ghastly joke in a story of Mademoiselle Valle's sacrosanct charge simply walking out of her enshrining arms into such a "galere"
as the most rackety and adventurous of pupils could scarcely have been led into. Such a point of view would have been quite possible for Feather--even probable, in the slightly spiteful att.i.tude of her light mind.
"She was away from home. Only you and I and Dowie know," answered Mademoiselle.
"Let us remain the only persons who know," said Coombe. "Robin will say nothing."
They both knew that. She had been feverish and ill for several days and Dowie had kept her in bed saying that she had caught cold.
Neither of the two women had felt it possible to talk to her. She had lain staring with a deadly quiet fixedness straight before her, saying next to nothing. Now and then she shuddered, and once she broke into a mad, heart-broken fit of crying which she seemed unable to control.
"Everything is changed," she said to Dowie and Mademoiselle who sat on either side of her bed, sometimes pressing her head down onto a kind shoulder, sometimes holding her hand and patting it.
"I shall be afraid of everybody forever. People who have sweet faces and kind voices will make me shake all over. Oh! She seemed so kind--so kind!"
It was Dowie whose warm shoulder her face hidden on this time, and Dowie was choked with sobs she dared not let loose. She could only squeeze hard and kiss the "silk curls all in a heap"--poor, tumbled curls, no longer a child's!
"Aye, my lamb!" she managed to say. "Dowie's poor pet lamb!"
"It's the knowing that kind eyes--kind ones--!" she broke off, panting. "It's the KNOWING! I didn't know before! I knew nothing.
Now, it's all over. I'm afraid of all the world!"
"Not all, cherie," breathed Mademoiselle.
She sat upright against her pillows. The mirror on a dressing table reflected her image--her blooming tear-wet youth, framed in the wonderful hair falling a shadow about her. She stared at the reflection hard and questioningly.
"I suppose," her voice was pathos itself in its helplessness, "it is because what you once told me about being pretty, is true. A girl who looks like THAT," pointing her finger at the gla.s.s, "need not think she can earn her own living. I loathe it," in fierce resentment at some bitter injustice. "It is like being a person under a curse!"
At this Dowie broke down openly and let her tears run fast. "No, no! You mustn't say it or think it, my dearie!" she wept. "It might call down a blight on it. You a young thing like a garden flower! And someone--somewhere--G.o.d bless him--that some day'll glory in it--and you'll glory too. Somewhere he is--somewhere!"
"Let none of them look at me!" cried Robin. "I loather them, too.
I hate everything--and everybody--but you two--just you two."
Mademoiselle took her in her arms this time when she sobbed again.
Mademoiselle knew how at this hour it seemed to her that all her world was laid bare forever more. When the worst of the weeping was over and she lay quiet, but for the deep catching breaths which lifted her breast in slow, childish shudders at intervals, she held Mademoiselle Valle's hand and looked at her with a faint, wry smile.
"You were too kind to tell me what a stupid little fool I was when I talked to you about taking a place in an office!" she said. "I know now that you would not have allowed me to do the things I was so sure I could do. It was only my ignorance and conceit. I can't answer advertis.e.m.e.nts. Any bad person can say what they choose in an advertis.e.m.e.nt. If that woman had advertised, she would have described Helene. And there was no Helene." One of the shuddering catches of her breath broke in here. After it, she said, with a pitiful girlishness of regret: "I--I could SEE Helene. I have known so few people well enough to love them. No girls at all. I though--perhaps--we should begin to LOVE each other. I can't bear to think of that--that she never was alive at all. It leaves a sort of empty place."
When she had sufficiently recovered herself to be up again, Mademoiselle Valle said to her that she wished her to express her grat.i.tude to Lord Coombe.
"I will if you wish it," she answered.
"Don't you feel that it is proper that you should do it? Do you not wish it yourself?" inquired Mademoiselle. Robin looked down at the carpet for some seconds.
"I know," she at last admitted, "that it is proper. But I don't wish to do it."
"No?" said Mademoiselle Valle.
Robin raised her eyes from the carpet and fixed them on her.
"It is because of--reasons," she said. "It is part of the horror I want to forget. Even you mayn't know what it has done to me.
Perhaps I am turning into a girl with a bad mind. Bad thoughts keep swooping down on me--like great black ravens. Lord Coombe saved me, but I think hideous things about him. I heard Andrews say he was bad when I was too little to know what it meant. Now, I KNOW, I remember that HE knew because he chose to know--of his own free will. He knew that woman and she knew him. HOW did he know her?"
She took a forward step which brought her nearer to Mademoiselle.
"I never told you but I will tell you now," she confessed, "When the door opened and I saw him standing against the light I--I did not think he had come to save me."