The Personal Life of David Livingstone Part 35

The missionary is sent forth as a messenger of the Churches, after undergoing the scrutiny and securing the approbation of a host of Christian ministers, who, by their own talent and worth, have risen to the pastorate over the most intelligent and influential churches in the land, and who, moreover, can have no motive to influence their selection but the desire to secure the most efficient instrumentality for the missionary work. So much care and independent investigation are bestowed on the selection as to make it plain that extraneous influences can have but small power. No pastor can imagine that any candidate has been accepted through his recommendations, however warm these may have been; and the missionary may go forth to the heathen, satisfied that in the confidence of the directors he has a testimonial infinitely superior to letters-apostolic from the Archbishop of Canterbury, or from the Vatican at Borne. A missionary, surely, cannot undervalue his commission, as soon as it is put into his hands.

But what means the lugubrious wail that too often bursts from the circle of his friends? The tears shed might be excused if he were going to Norfolk Island at the Government expense. But sometimes the missionary note is pitched on the same key. The white cliffs of Dover become immensely dear to those who never cared for ma.s.ses of chalk before.

Pathetic plaints are penned about laying their bones on a foreign sh.o.r.e, by those who never thought of making aught of their bones at home.

(Bone-dust is dear nowhere, we think.) And then there is the never-ending talk and wringing of hands over missionary "sacrifices."

The man is surely going to be hanged, instead of going to serve in Christ's holy Gospel! Is this such service as He deserves who, though rich, for our sakes became poor? There is so much in the _manner_ of giving; some bestow their favors so gracefully, their value to the recipient is doubled. From others, a gift is as good as a blow in the face. Are we not guilty of treating our Lord somewhat more scurvily than we would treat our indigent fellow-men? We stereotype the word "charity"

in our language, as applicable to a contribution to his cause. "So many charities,--we cannot afford them." Is not the word ungraciously applied to the Lord Jesus, as if He were a poor beggar, and an unworthy one too?

His are the cattle on a thousand hills, the silver and the gold; and worthy is the Lamb that was slain. We treat Him ill. Bipeds of the masculine gender a.s.sume the piping phraseology of poor old women in presence of Him before whom the Eastern Magi fell down and wors.h.i.+ped,--ay, and opened their treasures, and presented unto Him gifts: gold, frankincense, and myrrh. They will give their "mites" as if what they do give were their "all." It is utterly unfair to magnify the little we do for Him by calling it a sacrifice, or pretend we are doing all we can by a.s.suming the tones of poor widows. He asks a willing mind, cheerful obedience; and can we not give that to Him who made his Father's will in our salvation as his meat and his drink, till He bowed his head and gave up the ghost?

Hundreds of young men annually leave our sh.o.r.es as cadets. All their friends rejoice when they think of them bearing the commissions of our Queen. When any dangerous expedition is planned by Government, more volunteers apply than are necessary to man it. On the proposal to send a band of brave men in search of Sir John Franklin, a full complement for the s.h.i.+ps could have been procured of officers alone, without any common sailors. And what thousands rushed to California, from different parts of America, on the discovery of the gold! How many husbands left their wives and families! How many Christian men tore themselves away from all home endearments to suffer, and toil, and perish by cold and starvation on the overland route! How many sank from fever and exhaustion on the banks of Sacramento! Yet no word of sacrifices there. And why should we so regard all we give and do for the Well-beloved of our souls? Our talk of sacrifices is ungenerous and heathenish....

It is something to be a missionary. He is sometimes inclined, in seasons of despondency and trouble, to feel as if forgotten. But for whom do more prayers ascend?--prayers from the secret place, and from those only who are known to G.o.d. Mr. Moffat met those in England who had made his mission the subject of special prayer for more than twenty years, though they had no personal knowledge of the missionary. Through the long fifteen years of no success, of toil and sorrow, these secret ones were holding up his hands. And who can tell how often his soul may have been refreshed through their intercessions?...

It is something to be a missionary. The heart is expanded and filled with generous sympathies; sectarian bigotry is eroded, and the spirit of reclusion which makes it doubtful if some denominations have yet made up their minds to meet those who differ with them in heaven loses much of its fire....

There are many puzzles and entanglements, temptations, trials, and perplexities, which tend to inure the missionary's virtue. The difficulties encountered prevent his faith from growing languid. He must walk by faith, and though the horizon be all dark and lowering, he must lean on Him whom, having not seen, he loves. The future--a glorious future--is that for which he labors. It lies before him as we have seen the lofty coast of Brazil. No c.h.i.n.k in the tree-covered rocks appears to the seaman; but he glides right on. He works toward the coast, and when he enters the gateway by the sugar-loaf hill, there opens to the view in the Bay of Rio a scene of luxuriance and beauty unequaled in the world beside.

The missionary's head will lie low, and others will have entered into his labors, before his ideal is realized. The Future for which he works is one which, though sure, has never yet been seen. The earth shall be filled with the knowledge of the glory of the Lord. The missionary is a harbinger of the good time coming. When he preaches the Gospel to a tribe which has long sat in darkness, the signs of the coming of the Son of Man are displayed, The glorious Sun of Righteousness is near the horizon. He is the herald of the dawn, for come He will whose right it is to reign; and what a prospect appears, when we think of the golden age which has not been, but must yet come! Messiah has sat on the Hill of Zion for 1800 years. He has been long expecting that his enemies shall be made his footstool; and may we not expect, too, and lift up our heads, seeing the redemption of the world draweth nigh? The bow in the cloud once spread its majestic arch over the smoke of the fat of lambs ascending as a sweet-smelling savor before G.o.d--a sign of the covenant of peace--and the flickering light of the Shechinah often intimated the good-will of Jehovah. But these did not more certainly show the presence of the Angel of the Covenant than does the shaking among the nations the presence and energy of G.o.d's Holy Spirit; and to be permitted to rank as a fellow-worker with Him is a mercy of mercies. O Love Divine! how cold is our love to Thee! True, the missionary of the present day is only a stepping-stone to the future; but what a privilege he possesses! He is known to "G.o.d manifest in the flesh, justified in the Spirit, seen of angels, preached unto the Gentiles, believed on in the world, received up into Glory." Is that not enough?

Who would not be a missionary? His n.o.ble enterprise is in exact accordance with the spirit of the age, and what is called the spirit of the age is simply the movement of mult.i.tudes of minds in the same direction. They move according to the eternal and all-embracing decrees of G.o.d. The spirit of the age is one of benevolence, and it manifests itself in numberless ways--ragged schools, baths and wash-houses, sanitary reform, etc. Hence missionaries do not live before their time.

Their great idea of converting the world to Christ is no chimera: it is Divine. Christianity will triumph. It is equal to all it has to perform. It is not mere enthusiasm to imagine a handful of missionaries capable of converting the millions of India. How often they are cut off just after they have acquired the language! How often they retire with broken-down const.i.tutions before effecting anything! How often they drop burning tears over their own feebleness amid the defections of those they believed to be converts! Yes! but that small band has the decree of G.o.d on its side. Who has not admired the band of Leonidas at the pa.s.s of Thermopylae? Three hundred against three million. j.a.phet, with the decree of G.o.d on his side, only 300 strong, contending for enlargement with Shem and his 3,000,000. Consider what has been effected during the last fifty years. There is no vaunting of scouts now. No Indian gentlemen making themselves merry about the folly of thinking to convert the natives of India; magnifying the difficulties of caste; and setting our ministers into brown studies and speech-making in defense of missions.

No mission has yet been an entire failure. We who see such small segments of the mighty cycles of G.o.d's providence often imagine some to be failures which G.o.d does not. Eden was such a failure, The Old World was a failure under Noah's preaching. Elijah thought it was all up with Israel. Isaiah said: "Who hath believed our report, and to whom is the arm of the Lord revealed?" And Jeremiah wished his head were waters, his eyes a fountain of tears, to weep over one of G.o.d's plans for diffusing his knowledge among the heathen. If we could see a larger arc of the great providential cycle, we might sometimes rejoice when we weep; but G.o.d giveth not account of any of his matters. We must just trust to his wisdom. Let us do our duty. He will work out a glorious consummation.

Fifty years ago missions could not lift up their heads. But missions now are admitted by all to be one of the great facts of the age, and the sneers about "Exeter Hall" are seen by every one to embody a _risus sardonicus_. The present posture of affairs is, that benevolence is popular. G.o.d is working out in the human heart his great idea, and all nations shall see his glory.

Let us think highly of the weapons we have received for the accomplishment of our work. The weapons of our warfare are not carnal but spiritual, and mighty through G.o.d to the casting down of strongholds. They are--Faith in our Leader, and in the presence of his Holy Spirit; a full, free, unfettered Gospel; the doctrine of the cross of Christ,--an old story, but containing the mightiest truths ever uttered--mighty for pulling down the strongholds of sin, and giving liberty to the captives. The story of Redemption, of which Paul said, "I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ," is old, yet in its vigor, eternally young.

This work requires zeal for G.o.d and love for souls. It needs prayer from the senders and the sent, and firm reliance on Him who alone is the Author of conversion. Souls cannot be converted or manufactured to order. Great deeds are wrought in unconsciousness, from constraining love to Christ; in humbly asking, Lord, what wilt thou have me to do? in the simple feeling, we have done that which was our duty to do. They effect works, the greatness of which it will remain for posterity to discern. The greatest works of G.o.d in the kingdom of grace, like his majestic movements in nature, are marked by stillness in the doing of them, and reveal themselves by their effects. They come up like the sun, and show themselves by their own light. The kingdom of G.o.d cometh not with observation. Luther simply followed the leadings of the Holy Spirit in the struggles of his own soul. He wrought out what the inward impulses of his own breast prompted him to work, and behold, before he was aware, he was in the midst of the Reformation. So, too, it was with the Plymouth pilgrims, with their sermons three times a day on board the _Mayflower._ Without thinking of founding an empire, they obeyed the sublime teachings of the Spirit, the promptings of duty and the spiritual life. G.o.d working mightily in the human heart is the spring of all abiding spiritual power; and it is only as men follow out the sublime promptings of the inward spiritual life, that they do great things for G.o.d.

The movement of not one mind only, but the consentaneous movement of a mult.i.tude of minds in the same direction, const.i.tutes what is called the spirit of the age. This spirit is neither the law of progress nor blind development, but G.o.d's all-eternal, all-embracing purpose, the doctrine which recognizes the hand of G.o.d in all events, yet leaves all human action free. When G.o.d prepared an age for a new thought, the thought is thrust into the age as an instrument into a chemical solution--the crystals cl.u.s.ter round it immediately. If G.o.d prepares not, the man has lived before his time. Huss and Wycliffe were like voices crying in the wilderness, preparing the way for a brighter future; the time had not yet come.

Who would not be a missionary? "They that be wise shall s.h.i.+ne as the brightness of the firmament, and they that turn many to righteousness as the stars for ever and ever." Is G.o.d not preparing the world for missions which will embrace the whole of Adam's family? The gallant steams.h.i.+ps circ.u.mnavigate the globe. Emigration is going on at a rate to which the most renowned crusades of antiquity bear no proportion. Many men go to and fro, and knowledge is increased. No great emigration ever took place in our world without accomplis.h.i.+ng one of G.o.d's great designs. The tide of the modern emigration flows toward the West. The wonderful amalgamation of races will result in something grand. We believe this, because the world is becoming better, and because G.o.d is working mightily in the human mind. We believe it, because G.o.d has been preparing the world for something glorious. And that something, we conjecture, will be a fuller development of the missionary idea and work.

There will yet be a glorious consummation of Christianity. The last fifty years have accomplished wonders. On the American Continent, what a wonderful amalgamation of races we have witnessed, how wonderfully they have been fused into that one American people--type and earnest of a larger fusion which Christianity will yet accomplish, when, by its blessed power, all tribes and tongues and races shall become one holy family. The present popularity of beneficence promises well for the missionary cause in the future. Men's hearts are undergoing a process of enlargement, Their sympathies are taking a wider scope. The world is getting closer, smaller--quite a compact affair. The world for Christ will yet be realized. "The earth shall be filled with the knowledge of the Lord as the waters cover the sea."

No. II.

TREATMENT OF AFRICAN FEVER.

In July, 1859, when the Expedition to the Zambesi had been there about a year. Dr. Livingstone drew up and forwarded to Sir James Clark, Bart., M.D., a very full report on the treatment of African fever. The report details at length a large number of cases, the circ.u.mstances under which the attack was experienced, the remedies administered, and their effects. In order to ward off the disease in the mangrove swamps, which were justly described as hotbeds of fever, a dose of quinine was administered daily to each European, amounting to two grains, and taken in sherry wine. When an attack of the disease occurred, and the stomach did not refuse the remedies, Dr. Livingstone administered a dose of calomel with resin of jalap, followed by quinine. These remedies were in almost all cases successful, and the convalescence of the patient was wonderfully rapid. The "pills" which Dr. Livingstone often referred to were composed of resin of jalap, calomel, rhubarb, and quinine. It was usually observed that active employment kept off fever, and that on high lands its attacks were much less violent. Where the stomach refused the remedies a blister was usually the most effectual means of stopping the sickness.

Experience did not confirm the prophylactic action of quinine; exemption from attack in unfavorable situations was rather ascribed to active exercise, good diet, and to absence of damp, exposure to sun, and excessive exertion. Even while navigating an unhealthy part of the s.h.i.+re, and while, owing to the state of the vessel, the beds were constantly damp, good health was enjoyed, owing to the regular exercise and good fare.

In the upper regions of the s.h.i.+re, Dr. Livingstone says he and his companions were exposed in the early hours of the morning to the dew from the long gra.s.s, marching during the day over rough country under the tropical sun, and then sleeping in the open air; but though they had discontinued the daily use of quinine they Were perfectly well, as were also their native attendants. This was one of the considerations that gave him such confidence in the healthiness of the s.h.i.+re highlands.

Two or three years later, in writing to a friend, Dr. Livingstone thanked him for having sent him a missionary journal, which he greatly enjoyed--_The News of the Churches and Journal of Missions_. To show the very unusual pleasure which this Journal gave him, he proposed to send a communication to the editor, but said he was somewhat afraid to do so, lest it should meet the fate of many a paper forwarded to editors at an earlier period of his life. Mustering courage, he did send a letter, and we find it in the number of the journal for August, 1862. It is ent.i.tled, "A Note that may be useful to Missionaries in Africa," and consists of a statement of the remedy for fever, and an account of its operation. He had been led to think of this from seeing in the _News of the Churches_ for February, 1861, a reference to his remedy in an account of the death of the Helmores. The proportions of the several ingredients are given--"for a full-grown man six or eight grains of resin of jalap, and the same amount of rhubarb, with four grains of calomel, and four of quinine, made into pills with spirit of cardamoms.

On taking effect, quinine (not the unbleached kind), in four grains or larger doses is given every two hours or so, till the ears ring, or deafness ensues; this last is an essential part of the cure."

The last part of the letter is a description of Lake Nya.s.sa, and a statement of its importance for purposes of civilization and Christianity.

The _News of the Churches_ was projected in 1854 by the late Rev. Andrew Cameron, D.D., and the present writer, and conducted by them for a time; in 1862 it was in the hands of the Rev. Gavin Carlyle, now of Ealing.

No. III.

LETTER TO DR. TIDMAN, AS TO FUTURE OPERATIONS.

QUILIMANE, 23_d May_, 1856.

THE REV. DR. TIDMAN.

DEAR SIR,--Having by the good providence of our Heavenly Father reached this village on the 20th curt., I was pleased to find a silence of more than four years broken by your letter of the 24th August, 1855. I found, also, that H.M.'s brigatine "Dart" had called at this port several times in order to offer me a pa.s.sage homeward, but on the last occason in which this most friendly act was performed, her commander, with an officer of marines and five seamen, were unfortunately lost on the very dangerous bar at the mouth of the Quilimane River. This sad event threw a cold shade over all the joy I might otherwise have experienced on reaching the Eastern Coast. I felt as if it would have been easier for me to have died for them than to bear the thought of so many being cut off from all the joys of life in generously attempting to render me a service. As there is no regular means of proceeding from this to the Cape, I remain here in the hope of meeting another cruiser, which the kindness of Commodore Trotter has led me to expect, in preference to going by a small Arab or Portuguese trading vessel to some point on the "overland route to India." And though I may possibly reach you as soon as a letter, it appears advisable to state in writing my thoughts respecting one or two very important points in your communication.

Accompanied by many kind expressions of approbation, which I highly value on account of having emanated from a body of men whose sole object in undertaking the responsibility and labor of the Direction must have been a sincere desire to promote the interests of the kingdom of our Lord among the heathen, I find the intimation that the Directors are restricted in their power of aiding plans connected only remotely with the spread of the gospel. And it is added, also, that even though certain very formidable obstacles should prove surmountable, the "financial circ.u.mstances of the Society are not such as to afford any ground of hope that it would be, within any definite period, in a position to enter upon untried, remote, and difficult fields of labor."

If I am not mistaken, these statements imply a resolution on the part of the gentlemen now in the Direction, to devote the decreasing income of the Society committed to their charge to parts of the world of easy access, and in which the missionaries may devote their entire time and energies to the dissemination of the truths of the gospel with reasonable hopes of speedy success. This, there can be no doubt, evinces a sincere desire to perform their duty faithfully to their const.i.tuents, to the heathen, and to our Lord and Master, yet while still retaining that full conviction of the purity of their motives, which no measure adopted during the sixteen years of my connection with the Society has for a moment disturbed, I feel constrained to view "the untried, remote, and difficult fields," to which I humbly yet firmly believe G.o.d has directed my steps, with a resolution widely different from that which their words imply. As our aims and purposes will now appear in some degree divergent--on their part from a sort of paralysis caused by financial decay, and on mine from the simple continuance of an old determination to devote my life and my all to the service of Christ, in whatever way He may lead me in inter-tropical Africa--it seems natural, while yet without the remotest idea of support from another source, to give some of the reasons for differing with those with whom I have hitherto been so happily connected.

It remains vividly on my memory that some twenty years ago, while musing how I might spend my life so as best to promote the glory of the Lord Jesus, I came to the conclusion that from the c.u.mulative nature of gospel influence the outskirts even of the Empire of China presented the most inviting field for evangelical effort in the world. I was also much averse to being connected with any Society, having a strong desire to serve Christ in circ.u.mstances which would free my services from all professional aspect. But the solicitations of friends in whose judgment I had confidence led to my offers of service to the London Missionary Society. The "Opium War" was then adduced as a reason why that remote, difficult, and untried field of labor should stand in abeyance before the interior of Africa, to which, in opposition to my own judgment, I was advised to proceed. I did not, however, go with any sort of reluctance, for I had great respect for the honored men by whom the advice was given, and unbounded confidence in the special providence of Him who has said, "Commit thy way unto the Lord, etc. In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy steps." I was contented with the way in which I had been led, and happy in the prospect of being made instrumental in winning some souls to Christ.

The Directors wished me to endeavor to carry the gospel to the tribes north of the Kuruman. Having remained at that station sufficient time only to recruit my oxen, I proceeded in the direction indicated, and while learning the language I visited the Bakhatla, Bakwains, Bangwaketse, and Bamangwato tribes, in order to select a suitable locality for a mission, in the hope of succeeding in making a second Kuruman or central station, which would, by G.o.d's blessing, influence a large circ.u.mference. I chose Mabotsa, no one who has seen that country since has said the choice was injudicious. The late Rev. Dr. Philip alone was opposed to this plan on account of solicitude for my safety, "because Mosilikatse was behind the Cashan mountains thirsting for the blood of the first white man who should fall into his hands. And no man would in his sober senses build his house on the crater of a volcano."

Having removed to the Bakwains of Sechele, I spent some of the happiest years of my life in missionary labor, and was favored in witnessing a gratifying measure of success in the spread of the knowledge of the gospel. The good seed was widely sown, and is not lost. It will yet bear fruit, though I may not live to see it. In the pursuit of my plan I tried to plant among the tribes around by means of native teachers and itineracies. We have heard again and again of a "preparatory work going on" in India, but who ever heard of such in Africa? A village of 600 or 800 may have one, or even two missionaries, with school-masters and schoolmistresses, and the nearest population, fifty or one hundred miles off, cannot feel their influence. Believers will not, in many cases, go beyond the circle of their own friends and acquaintances.

I was happy in having two worthy men of color, to aid me in diffusing a knowledge of Christ among the Eastern tribes, but the Boers forbade us to preach unto the Gentiles that they might be saved. My attention was turned to Sebituane by Sechele at the very time this happened, but I had no intention of leaving the Bakwains. Droughts succeeded, and these, with perpetual threats and annoyances from the Boers, so completely distracted the mind of the tribe that our operations were almost suspended. It is well known that food for the mind has but little savor for starving stomachs. The famine, and the unmistakable determination of the Boers to enslave my people, at last made me look to the north seriously. There was no precipitancy. Letters went to and from India respecting my project before resolving to leave, and I went at last, after being obliged to send my family to Kuruman in order to be out of the way of a threatened attack of the Boers. When we reached Lake 'Ngami, about which so much has been said, I immediately asked for guides to take me to Sebituane, because to form a settlement in which the gospel might be planted was the great object for which I had come.

Guides were refused, and the Bayeiye were prevented from ferrying me across the Zouga. I made a raft, but after working in the water for hours it would not carry me. (I have always been thankful, since I knew how alligators abound there, that I was not then killed by one.) Next year affairs were not improved at Kolobeng, and while attempting the north again fever drove us back. In both that and the following year I took my family with me in order to obviate the loss of time which returning for them would occasion. The Boers subsequently, by relieving me of all my goods, freed me from the labor of returning to Kolobeng at all.

Of the circ.u.mstances attending our arrival at Sebituane's, and the project of opening up a path to the coast, you are already so fully aware, from having examined and awarded your approbation, I need scarcely allude to it. Double the time has been expended to that which I antic.i.p.ated, but as it chiefly arose from sickness, the loss of time was unavoidable. The same cause produced interruptions in preaching the gospel--as would have been the case had I been indisposed anywhere else.

The foregoing short notices of all the plans which I can bring to my recollection since my arrival in Africa lead me to the question, which of the plans it is that the Directors particularize when they say they are restricted in their power of aiding plans only remotely connected with the spread of the gospel. It cannot be the last surely, for I had their express approval before leaving Cape Town, and they yield to none in admiration of the zeal with which it has been executed. Then which is it?

As it cannot be meant to apply in the way of want of funds deciding the suspension of operations which would make the connection remote enough with the spread of the gospel by us, I am at a loss to understand the phraseology, and therefore trust that the difficulty may be explained.

The difficulties are mentioned in no captious spirit, though, from being at a loss as to the precise meaning of the terms, I may appear to be querulous. I am not conscious of any diminution of the respect and affection with which I have always addressed you. I am, yours affectionately, DAVID LIVINGSTON.

No. IV.

LORD CLARENDON'S LETTER TO SEKELETU.

_From_ THE EARL OF CLARENDON, _Princ.i.p.al Secretary of State for Foreign Affairs of Her Majesty, the Queen of Great Britain, to our esteemed Friend_ SEKELETU, _Chief of the

The Queen our Sovereign and the British Government have learned with much pleasure from her Majesty's servant, Dr. Livingstone, the kind manner in which you co-operated with him in his endeavors to find a path from your country to the sea on the West Coast, and again, when he was following the course of the river Zambesi from your town to the Eastern Coast, by furnis.h.i.+ng him on each occasion with canoes, provisions, oxen, and men, free of expense; and we were pleased to hear that you, your elders and people, are all anxious to have direct intercourse with the English nation, and to have your country open to commerce and civilization.

Ours is a great commercial and Christian nation, and we desire to live in peace with all men. We wish others to sleep soundly as well as ourselves; and we hate the trade in slaves. We are all the children of one common Father; and the slave-trade being hateful to Him, we give you a proof of our desire to promote your prosperity by joining you in the attempt to open up your country to peaceful commerce. With this view the Queen sends a small steam-vessel to sail along the river Zambesi, which you know and agreed to be the best pathway for conveying merchandise, and for the purpose of exploring which Dr. Livingstone left you the last time. This is, as all men know, "G.o.d's pathway;" and you will, we trust, do all that you can to keep it a free pathway for all nations, and let no one be molested when traveling on the river.

We are a manufacturing people, and make all the articles which you see and hear of as coming from the white men. We purchase cotton and make it into cloth; and if you will cultivate cotton and other articles, we are willing to buy them. No matter how much you may produce, our people will purchase it all. Let it be known among all your people, and among all the surrounding tribes, that the English are the friends and promoters of all lawful commerce, but that they are the enemies of the slave-trade and slave-hunting.

We a.s.sure you, your elders and people, of our friends.h.i.+p, and we hope that the kindly feelings which you entertain toward the English may be continued between our children's children; and, as we have derived all our greatness from the Divine religion we received from Heaven, it will be well if you consider it carefully when any of our people talk to you about it.