A Hawk In Silver Part 10

"He didn't come with you?"

He was facing the sea, so she couldn't see his face when he said, "I haven't been in the Hills since midsummer."13 Autumn Ten minutes later the three of them were leaning on the rail at the bus-stop waiting for a bus to Birchdale Junction. Away from the open sea, the buildings shut in the heat. The town was furnace-hot, smelling of dust and petrol and sweat.

"So what happened midsummer?" Holly persisted.

"Nothing," Fletcher said. "Do you think, if anything had happened, the morkani would dare come that close to the sh.o.r.e?"

"What went wrong?"

He sighed. "I don't know. Starkweather and I brought the Harp to Mathurin, and him white with relief, but he played.

And there was Elathan, Oberon, the House of Raven... and he hit the note, I swear it; the note that breaks the walls between the worlds-"

"We heard it," Chris told him.

"So you know what it was like. I think we broke through for a second-I saw another place. Trees and bracken."

Holly looked up quickly. "I saw that."

"Yes. Yes, there might be a few humans who could. But it does not matter, the Starlord did not hear. That's all. There's nothing else."

"Yeah, but..." Holly paused, studying him, thinking, He's different, how? He doesn't look younger than me, not now.

"You said you weren't in the Hills?"

He was sullen. "All I asked Elathan to do was trust me. We know one of the elukoi is traitor-I didn't want them to know how we got the Harp. So I didn't tell. He said if I felt that way I need not come back to the Hills. I said-" he stopped on an intake of breath, shaking his head at the memory "-I said a lot. And walked out."

Jesus! Holly was swamped with envy. If only we could all do that-!

"Both of you; one more thing. Ignore any contact from the Hills. It would be a morkani trick-or if not, they'd want to find me. And I'm not interested."

Chris was on a different track. "You got nowhere to stay, then?"

"I've been sleeping in those caves up the East Hill."

"They stink." Chris added, "And what about winter? If you're staying permanent, you'll want a job, too."

"I've met some people who might help me."

Holly put in, "Yes, but you need a place to stay in the meantime. Listen, Chris, you know the horse's field; there's two stables and a shed. I dunno what it's like now, but last year the man had it done up as accommodation, so he could come down and spend the night if one of the horses was sick. There's water and electric. The old man that owns it, he's crackers, got pots of money. Now suppose-"

"I'm ahead of you. But what about when they come to look at the horses?"

"That's just it, that's what put the idea into my head. There was only Strawberry and her foal there, and they've moved them over to the Hollington stables, and shut these up for the winter. So it's free till spring, March at least. What d'you think, Fletch?"

"Oh, you are going to ask me? I did wonder. Yes, I don't see why not. As for a job-" a questioning glance at Holly.

"We'll work something out." She would have him close at hand, she realised, and be able to tell him what he needed to get on.

"Hey-up, here's the bus." Chris tucked her towel under her arm and felt in her pockets. "Who's got bus fare?"

They drifted apart around six, Fletcher having seen the shed and agreed that it was habitable. Holly expected to find her parents home, as they had decided to skip the visit to Combe Marish.

She thought, Maybe we can have a proper Sat.u.r.day evening. We haven't since that old goat got ill. He won't get better and he won't die-what can you do?

Shutting the front door behind her, she knew at once that something was wrong. For a wild moment she thought the attack on Chris had been a diversion, while something reached out to this house from the sea...

A door banged. Her mother came downstairs, the familiar hara.s.sed expression on her face. Seeing Holly, she stopped.

"What's up? Where's Dad?"

"He's on his way over to Combe Marish, dear."

But Holly already knew, and thought she must have known since she came in. "Grandad's dead, then?"

"Your father had a call from Elizabeth. He went into hospital again on the Wednesday and died last night. Daddy's gone over to be with Elizabeth." She drew a deep breath, let it out slowly, and walked down the rest of the stairs. "Well, we expected it sooner or later."

Yeah, but this is sooner. Holly's skin had gone clammy-cold and she felt violently sick.

The funeral took place the following Monday.

The cold and sickness in her increased all through that Monday morning, though the temperature was in the eighties. She was silent during the short drive to Combe Marish, and it took an effort to follow her parents into the house.

"At three." Her father's voice. "Cremation."

Holly stared out of the window, yearning for the sunlight, praying for the end of the day. Her thoughts were chaotic. I'mso scared, so afraid. I never thought it was going to happen... I never meant what I said. If he could die, anybody could. Never believed that.

Anybody. Liz, Dad, Mum-even them. Even me. Oh G.o.d, even me...

Two long black cars came, one with flowers and the pale wood coffin, one for the family. Holly banged her head getting into the car, flushed with embarra.s.sment, held back an obscenity. At other times there would have been a laugh to take the sting out of it, but now-father, mother, aunt; all locked in the same silence.

The coffin's so small, I didn't think it'd be like that... She pulled her thoughts away from it. This car smells of leather. It's so hot.

Can't we have a window open... suppose not We're going fast. I always thought these things were slow. Maybe it's a long way. Let me out of here!

Cold and sweating again, she dragged her mind away from panic. Her father sat beside her with bowed head. She thought: Never crossed my mind-he was his father. How would I feel if Dad-no! h.e.l.l. He must feel terrible.

On impulse she put her hand over his and squeezed it He lifted his head and smiled briefly. She smiled back, then leaned against the black upholstery, partially rea.s.sured.

The Suss.e.x countryside glided past, parched with the long heat. Most of the way ran through narrow high-hedged country lanes, where yellow leaves foreshadowed autumn.

At last the cars slowed and turned and glided smoothly up the drive to the crematorium.

"You go in with Elizabeth, dear."

"What?" Hearing her mother's whispered instruction, Holly nearly backed out completely. "Hey, no, not me-"

"Go on! I'm not telling you twice!"

Holly went.

There was a building which she supposed must be a chapel, though the inside was very modern. A dark-suited man played an organ quietly.

How many times does he do that in a day? she wondered. It's just a job to them, I suppose. What a way to make a living.

A young clergyman officiated. Holly fumbled her way into the pews by Elizabeth and watched him while the others settled. Brown eyes, brown hair, not bad-looking, too old... She watched the light slant down through high windows.... I suppose that thing over there is a bier...

The coffin stood on a raised platform to their left, between pews and altar. Holly looked once, then avoided it.

The words of the service went over her head, she paid no attention. It was difficult enough to watch out of the corner of her eye and see what her parents did; to kneel when they did, stand and sit when they did, and-final embarra.s.sment -join her feeble voice with theirs when they sang one verse of a hymn. The coffin glided out of sight behind a curtain, to accompanying chords from the organ.

Let me out! She had shut herself off from everything with that thought, repeating it over and over inside her head to drown out all other thoughts. Now it was over. She stood a little distant from the group while the clergyman talked with her aunt and her parents. She saw Elizabeth had been crying, was red-eyed and white-faced. There was a quick discussion about whether the flowers should go to the local hospital or not...

Out in the open air at last, Holly stretched and flung back her head and let all the tension drop away from her. The sun slanted gold in her face. The last trees of summer glowed green against the hot pale blue sky; a breeze shook the trees and brushed her face; she heard distant cars and the quarrel-ling of sparrows. Beyond the trees the country unrolled patchwork to the horizon; dark hedges, cl.u.s.tered villages, needle-spires; and the great fields of corn, golden, ash-white, pale as snow.

Smoke rose from other fields; stubble being burnt off, and the acrid biscuity smell came to her clearly. The world was brilliant as crystal and running over with light.

Suddenly her throat was tight, she must open her mouth to breathe; tears were stinging in her eyes as she stood struck through by summer, and all the coldness fell from her.

What a day! It sang in her head, still with her face to the wind and the light; seeing and feeling and touching and smell-ing the world. It was pure joy to stand four-square on the earth in a young and healthy body. She wanted to run and run forever, leap high and come down wild and yelling- Her mother's touch recalled her and she stooped to enter the car again. The others followed, less silent, more relaxed. It's over, the worst is over... they talked quietly and without tension.

For the first time Holly's thoughts went to her grandfather as a person, not a sick object or a horror in a pine box. She thought, I didn't like him when he was alive and I won't say I do now he's dead, but Lord! am I sorry for him. All this, all the world-I can see it, he can't, and never will again. He's dead, that's that. But me... as long as you're alive and healthy, as long as it can be like this-what else matters? What else could?

Holly and Chris met in the playground, in the crowd sur-rounding the blackboard with the new form-lists on it.

"We still together?"

Chris elbowed her way to the front. "Anderson, H; Ivy, C; ye G.o.ds above-"

"Gabriel, H?"

"You said it, kid. Most of her lot, too-they don't seem to have switched many people this time. And we're in Hut Five-"

"Not the Huts again!" In winter the five prefab cla.s.srooms were draughty, cold and cramped.

"-with guess who, your friend and mine, Taf Jones the historical hysterical Welshman."

Holly shrugged. "Taf's OK. I might stand a chance of pa.s.sing history if we've got him for form-master."

"Only if the O-level's on Owen Glendower!"

"Let's s.h.i.+ft up and grab desks before the rabble get in there."

They extricated themselves from the crowd and ran up to the Huts. Holly banged her satchel down on the back row corner desk, sat down and put her feet up. She hated the first day of term. Chris put her case on the next desk and leaned on top of it.

"Wanna talk to you."

"Go ahead, I'm all ears-no funny comments required."

Chris ignored the attempted humour. "You free tonight?""Sure, sure. Where're we going?"

"Brancaer."

Holly stared blankly for a second, then sighed. "Forget it."

"Forget it, h.e.l.l! Because of what that boy says? I've been thinking-"

"Don't. You'll strain something."

"Never mind all that. There's too many things we don't know about.... We're not safe. Last Sat.u.r.day proved that."

"Don't be dramatic."

"Dammit all to h.e.l.l, somebody tried to kill me-now don't you make faces at me, Holly Anderson, you know d.a.m.n well that what I say is true!"

"So there's a very simple answer. Leave it alone."

"Think we can? Come midwinter there's going to be trouble with a capital T. Think it'll only be the Hills? Think the sea-people won't remember us?"

"Well...." I don't want to get involved again, but... "Say what you like, Fletcher had good reasons for warning us off."

"Just because him and Elathan have split up. I want to know what the Hills are going to do now."

You're scared. Me too. Holly knew better than to argue directly. "What say we go round to Fletch's after school and see what he says?"

"And if he don't come up with something, we go see Elathan."

"Let's hear the boy first."

The day wore on. Above the town birds flew singly or in flocks, patrolling or watching. Gulls were thick along the sh.o.r.eline. Sparrows and thrushes perched on roofs in company with Tarac and others of her people.

On the ground was little activity. A cat dozed in the sun by Chris's house, another by Holly's; a third prowled about the school. They also were backed up-one by a dirty mongrel with red ears, whose pups were also waiting about the town.

Stalemate. Let one gull stray too far inland and it was mobbed by carrion crows. Let one hound come too close to the beach and it must ran with a dozen razor-beaked gulls to speed it on its way.

Holly and Chris and the rest of the human population of the south coast remained serenely unaware that a war was going on. Only the elukoi and morkani knew and marked each loss.

"Now?"

"OK.".

The two girls went over the hedge into the horse's field without being seen. It was shortly after half-past seven, the sun setting slowly. As far as their parents were concerned they were at the Youth Club.

"Meaning we have till at least half-ten," Chris had said, "since they don't chuck out till ten. If we're going to the Hills we need that much time."

"Yeah. If."

Now they went up the margins of the field towards the stables, and the low building that Fletcher was converting for his own use. There were no sounds; the sky was clear of all birds.