If I Break: Beautifully Broken Part 16

Lauren He's coming with me.

Chris and I are going back to Chicago. This time there isn't a question of his motive. He's told me that he loves me, that he wants to be with me and raise Caylen together. I should be ecstatic, everything is coming together-but on what type of foundation? Secrets and lies? This doesn't feel right. I can't shake Dexter Crestfield's smarmy smile from my thoughts. I keep trying to get Lisa's looming secret out of my mind. Helen's instructions, which I basically threw out the window, are making me rethink everything. I keep thinking that going back to Chicago may not be the right move, but whenever I think about Chris' dad I can't imagine us staying here another day.

If we left we could avoid the entire Lisa ordeal until...I don't know, until...If things somehow become perfect then she ruins it with whatever she has to tell Chris. It's selfish and stupid but I really just wish she wouldn't. If it's not life and death and it will hurt him, I wish she'd just keep it to herself, but then again, whatever it is Aidan thinks it could be the cause of Chris creating Cal. What could be so big that it has to do with Lisa, but if she tells him, could that be the key to them integrating? I have to know that Chris is committed to that before doing a re-run of what I did last night with him.

"Hey," I turn and see him standing there a nervous smile on his face and it instantly makes me feel better.

"How is the packing going?" I ask, letting out a pent up breath.

"It was good until Aidan interrupted me," he sighs.

"Aidan's here?"

"He just left," he says, rubbing the back of his head.

"Did he want anything in particular?"

"Other than to irritate me," he chuckles and I smile relieved. Aidan didn't budge on telling me anything about what Lisa told him, but he's a very straight forward guy and doesn't seem like the type who'd be able to keep a secret in plain sight.

"We had an argument, sort of, but he's going to meet me at Lisa's later," he shrugs and my heart speeds up.

"Lisa's," I can't help but repeat.

"Yeah. He said she has something important to tell me. I want to get it out the way before we leave," he says, sitting down on what has been Caylen's and my bed.

"Are you okay?" he asks concerned. I swallow the lump in my throat.

"Of course, why would you ask that?"

"Well you've folded that s.h.i.+rt over almost three times since I've been in here," he chuckles. I toss the stupid s.h.i.+rt on the bed.

"I'll admit my nerves are a little on edge," I sigh. He sighs.

"This probably isn't going to help but my dad wants to talk to us."

"Really? He hasn't dished out enough verbal abuse before we leave?" I ask sarcastically, grabbing another s.h.i.+rt of Caylen's and folding it.

"He says he wants to apologize to you and doesn't want us to leave on a bad note," he adds and I can't help but look at Chris in disbelief.

"I know my dad's been a real p.r.i.c.k lately," he laughs and I nod. He's been more than a p.r.i.c.k.

"But that's not the man he usually is. That's not the dad I know. It's just I think this Cal thing..."

"If you want us to talk to him Chris, I can do that, but the moment he says anything negative or remotely insulting I'll be exiting the conversation," I shrug and he smiles relieved.

"Okay."

"Are you ready now?" he asks and grunts.

As ready as I'm going to be.

"Yeah, let's get it out the way."

I follow Chris out the room and into the dining room. Mr. Scott is sitting at the head of the table, his hands folded but his face relatively relaxed and the hardened frown I've become accustomed to absent. When he sees us he even smiles and that shocks the h.e.l.l out of me. Since I've met the man he's never smiled at me once. I don't know what Chris said to him after our conversation this afternoon but it really must have been something. When we're seated he takes a deep breath, and he s.h.i.+fts his body weight towards me.

"First I'd like to apologize to you Lauren," he says without a hint of bitterness or anger hidden beneath his tone. I nearly fall out of my chair.

"I have been extremely unhospitable to you since you've arrived," he continues.

"Just a plain jerk," he adds with a chuckle.

Yeah you have.

"I blamed you for things that were not your fault. I used you as someone to take my anger out on since they weren't here for it and I am truly sorry for how I have been towards you."

Has h.e.l.l just frozen over? Who is this man sitting in front of me?

"Christopher, what you told me this morning really was a wakeup call for me. You did exactly as you should have and stood up for your wife, for her respect and I couldn't be more proud of you," he says putting his hand on Chris'. I can't help but note how pleased Chris looks, how much stress seems to have poured off him just in these few minutes.

"I want you both to know that, if you choose to stay, it will be different around here on my end. I will be here to support whatever decisions that you make, but both Gwen and I would be thrilled if you chose to stay."

So that's what this is about. He wants Chris to stay, G.o.d forbid he steps out from under Papa's wing.

"Well Dad that's..."

"You don't have to answer me now. I'll give you both time to talk about it. I just know that one of the main reasons you're leaving is because of the way I have been acting and I couldn't sleep tonight if I knew that I was breaking up our family," he says and I can't believe my eyes when I see that Mr. Scott is actually tearing up. What in the world has just happened? He turns towards me.

"Lauren do you accept my apology?" he asks and takes my hand in his. I can't believe this is happening. I glance over at Chris who looks like he's about to tear up as well.

This man has been nothing but mean, nasty and cruel to me since I've known him, but this guy in front of me seems to not even be the same person. If Chris was his biological son right now I'd swear that DID runs in their family.

"I-I," I stutter, not knowing what to say. I glance back at Chris who has this pleading expression on his face. How can I not give him what he wants? His happy family. If William can stop being a jerk, or at least pretend, then I can move forward, I guess.

"Of course," I tell him and before I know it he's stood up and pulled me into a bear hug.

Am I dreaming? After he releases me he does the same to Chris but Chris' return embrace is genuine.

"Thanks, Dad," he says almost beaming. Mrs. Scott appears in the doorway and soon everyone is hugging. I don't know what to say or what to think. They're happy so I should be happy. This could mean things are going to go really well, we deserve a break after everything. Chris deserves a break. Then my thoughts drift to... what happens after?

February 7, 2011 "I can't say I'm not surprised, because nothing about you surprises me. But you successfully married and happy? I didn't see that in your future. I am very proud of you," Helen beams at me like a gold digger who's just spotted a dying single billionaire.

"Why thank you mother. I knew you'd be proud," I say, just as sarcastically.

"Even remembering your two month anniversary. I am very impressed," she says, handing me the box with Lauren's present in it.

"These are the Dorothy Shoes?" I ask, looking at the box. Helen has it wrapped in black paper with a big red bow.

"The correct name is limited edition Loubuitons," she corrects me.

"The Dorothy shoes that fine a.s.s Jessica Alba had on?" I ask.

"Yes Cal. The 'Dorothy' shoes," she says dryly and takes a seat on my couch.

"Dex only remembered our anniversary because his a.s.sistant reminded him," she chuckled.

"Well, I have to tell you, I know I don't say it a lot but 'Thank you'. For everything," I tell her with a shrug.

"You deserve to be happy Cal. I'm glad you've finally allowed yourself to be," she says, patting my shoulder.

"Well I'll be happy once you get the final okay on the meds," I tell her, handing her my empty pill bottle. She hasn't given me a refill, and won't until she receives some final results.

"I'm headed to the team right after I leave here. Besides I better get going, before I ruin your surprise," she says, standing from her seat.

"Let me know what Lauren says once she sees the shoes. I had trouble parting with them," she says before I head out the door.

I look at the clock. Lauren won't be expecting me for a while. I've worked out for two hours. I can't wait until I get home and get see the look on her face when she sees them. Especially since I'm going to pretend not to remember what today is. Everything has been so f.u.c.king good. I've never been this happy in my whole life. I never thought I could feel like this about someone. I took all that I wanted out of life. Everything I have I had to take or fight for. With Lauren it's not like that, for once the universe is cutting me a break. Me, the dark sheep, the prodigal son, happily married to a beautiful, amazing woman who loves me. Not for who she thinks I am or wants me to be, just me. There's really no better feeling than that. I wouldn't trade it for the world on a platter.

I knew she'd be p.i.s.sed when she thought I forgot our anniversary. She's so s.e.xy when she's p.i.s.sed. It's cute that she tried to hide that she was upset at first. She was obviously disappointed, but with a little prodding she let it out. I hate when she doesn't say what she feels or tries to hide her emotions. I don't want her to hide any part of herself from me. That's why my favorite look on her face is right when she comes. You can't hide that at all.

"You're mad." I sigh trying to keep from laughing as I put down my suitcase.

"No. Well, yeah, I am. I can give you a pa.s.s for forgetting our anniversary, even though it was only two months ago but if you think I'm going to give you a pa.s.s for every holiday because you think it's 'cliche' or 'arbitrary'..." she trails off as I pull out the shoes Helen had wrapped. I set the box on her lap and laugh at myself for the big cheesy grin that's on my face.

"You were saying, Mrs. Scott?"

A huge grin spreads across her face and she rolls her eyes at me.

"You're a jerk, you know that?" she jokes, untying the bow on the box.

I sit next to her and kiss her neck. She's so careful taking it apart.

"Come on babe, tear into it!"

"Okay, okay. It's just so pretty," she squeals, removing the paper and when she sees the box she freezes. She looks over at me her eyes wide and bright.

"You didn't!" she says excitedly. She opens the box to see a pair of Dorothy shoes she talked about for a week straight.

"Oh my gos.h.!.+ Cal," she says her eyes tearing up.

"Read the card," I say pointing to it tucked in between the shoes. She picks it up.

"These shoes look like they're straight out of 'The Wizard of Oz,' but since sometimes I'm like the tornado that blew you into Oz, I guess you can wear Dorothy's red slippers. And if I'm gone and seem lost, maybe you can do a little click and I'll find my way home."

"It's corny isn't it?" I ask, feeling a little embarra.s.sed.

She nods and climbs on my lap.

"As corny as you being my Prince Charming," she says, kissing me softly. I want more of her. I wrap my arms around her waist and press her down on my lap so she can feel how much I want her. She giggles.

"Are you going to wear them for me?"

"I have the perfect white dress for them," she says, running her hands through my hair.

"No dress. Just them," I say, watching her skin turn red.

"Later," she promises. "I have to run and pick up your gift," she says hopping off me. She runs to the console table and grabs her purse.

"No, my gift can be you," I whine. She cannot leave me with a full hard on.

"It will be. Tonight," she promises, reaching the door. I give her the saddest face I can muster.

"Don't look at me like that." She giggles, and I make my way closer to her. "No. Five feet," she threatens, her hand on the doork.n.o.b, laughing.

"I hope you've gotten a lot of sleep since I've been gone. Because you're going to be up all night," she says, giving me a faux-warning and my body perks up at the thought.

"Plenty," I say with a wink before she slips out the door.

My work out this morning must have really kicked my a.s.s. I usually never take naps. When the phone rings I almost put it back down until I see it's Dexter and he's called twice.

"What's up Dexter?" I ask groggily.

"We have a problem," he says solemnly. His tone causes me to sit up in the bed.

"What type of problem?" I ask him anxiously.

"Helen's talked to her team. The medication hasn't been recommended for further trial..." I heard what he just said, but he can't have just said what I think he's just said.

"Can you run that by me again?" I ask, hoping that I heard him wrong, that I'm still asleep and my brain isn't functioning right.

"I'm sorry Cal," he says quietly. He's sorry? No, no f.u.c.king way.

"I don't give a s.h.i.+t what the eggheads are saying. Have Helen bring me the rest of what she has," I say simply.

"Cal she can't. The medication has shown dangerous side effects. They are going to do further testing but as of now, it's all being decimated."

"You're kidding me. You're f.u.c.king kidding me!" I yell. f.u.c.k controlling my temper or trying not to be mad. This, this can't. They can't just stop it.

"It's been working Dex. Other than the d.a.m.n hot flashes, it's working. You know it is," I say, feeling myself start to panic.

"Helen can tell you the medical specifics but if you have any more, flush it. You have to stop taking it."

"Bulls.h.i.+t!" I yell into the phone. I want to throw it into the wall.

"I know you're mad Cal,"