A Dangerous Mourning - BestLightNovel.com
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For an instant his face was perfectly sober, his blue eyes very clear, the lines of anxiety ironed out, and they shared a complete understanding. Both had seen the carnage of the battlefield and the long torture of wounds afterwards and the maimed lives. They knew the price of incompetence and bravado. It was an alien life from this house and its civilized routine and iron discipline of trivia, the maids rising at five to clean the fires, black the grates, throw damp tea leaves on the carpets and sweep them up, air the rooms, empty the slops, dust, sweep, polish, turn the beds, launder, iron dozens of yards of linens, petticoats, laces and ribbons, st.i.tch, fetch and carry till at last they were excused at nine, ten or eleven in the evening.
"You tell them about nursing," he said at last, and quite openly took out the bottle and repositioned it more comfortably, then turned and left, walking with a lift in his step and a very slight swagger.
Upstairs Hester had just brought the tray for Beatrice and set it down, and was about to leave when Araminta came in.
"Good afternoon, Mama," she said briskly. "How are you feeling?" Like her father she seemed to find Hester invisible. She went and kissed her mother's cheek and then sat down on the nearest dressing chair, her skirts overflowing in mounds of darkest gray muslin with a lilac fichu, dainty and intensely flattering, and yet still just acceptable for mourning. Her hair was the same bright flame as always, her face its delicate, lean asymmetry.
"Exactly the same, thank you," Beatrice answered without real interest. She turned slightly to look at Araminta, a pucker of confusion around her mouth. There was no sense of affection between them, and Hester was uncertain whether she should leave or not. She had a curious sense that in some way she was not intruding because the tension between the two women, the lack of knowing what to say to each other, already excluded her. She was a servant, someone whose opinion was of no importance whatever, indeed someone not really of existence.
"Well I suppose it is to be expected." Araminta smiled, but the warmth did not reach her eyes."I am afraid the police do not seem to be achieving anything. I have spoken to the sergeant-Evan, I think his name is-but he either knows nothing or he is determined not to tell me." She glanced absently at the frill of the chair arm. "Will you speak to them, if they wish to ask you anything?''
Beatrice looked up at the chandelier above the center of the room. It was unlit this early in the afternoon, but the last rays of the lowering sun caught one or two of its crystals.
"I can hardly refuse. It would seem as if I did not wish to help them.''
"They would certainly think so," Araminta agreed, watching her mother intently. "And they could not be criticized for it.'' She hesitated, her voice hard-edged, slow and very quiet, every word distinct. "After all, we know it was someone in the house, and while it may be one of the servants-my own opinion is that it was probably Percival-"
"Percival?" Beatrice stiffened and turned to look at her daughter. "Why?"
Araminta did not meet her mother's eyes but stared somewhere an inch or two to the left. "Mama, this is hardly the time for comfortable pretenses. It is too late.''
"I don't know what you mean," Beatrice answered miserably, hunching up her knees.
"Of course you do." Araminta was impatient. "Percival is an arrogant and presumptuous creature who has the normal appet.i.tes of a man and considerable delusions as to where he may exercise them. And you may choose not to see it, but Octavia was flattered by his admiration of her-and not above encouraging him now and then-"
Beatrice winced with revulsion. "Really, Minta."
"I know it is sordid," Araminta said more gently, a.s.surance gathering in her voice. "But it seems that someone in this house killed her-which is very hard, Mama, but we won't alter it by pretending. It will only get worse, until the police find whoever it is."
Beatrice narrowed her shoulders and leaned forward, hugging her legs, staring straight ahead of her.
"Mama?" Araminta said very carefully. "Mama-do you know something?"
Beatrice said nothing, but held herself even more tightly. It was an att.i.tude of absorption with inner pain which Hester had seen often before.
Araminta leaned closer. "Mama-are you trying to protect me . . . because of Myles?"
Slowly Beatrice looked up, stiff, silent, the back of her bright head towards Hester, so similar in color to her daughter's.
Araminta was ashen, her features set, her eyes bright and hard.
"Mama, I know he found Tavie attractive, and that he was not above"-she drew in her breath and let it out slowly- "above going to her room. I like to believe that because I am her sister, she refused him. But I don't know. It is possible he went again-and she rebuffed him. He doesn't take refusal well-as I know.''
Beatrice stared at her daughter, slowly stretched out her hand in a gesture of shared pain. But Araminta moved no closer, and she let her hand fall. She said nothing. Perhaps there were no words for what she either knew or dreaded.
"Is that what you are hiding from, Mama?'' Araminta asked relentlessly. "Are you afraid someone will ask you if that is what happened?"
Beatrice lay back and straightened the covers around herself before replying. Araminta made no move to help her. "It would be a waste of time to ask me. I don't know, and I certainly should not say anything of that sort.'' She looked up. "Please, Minta, surely you know that?"
At last Araminta leaned forward and touched her mother, putting her thin, strong hand over hers. "Mama, if it were Myles, then we cannot hide the truth. Please G.o.d it was not- and they will find it was someone else . . . soon-" She stopped, her face full of concern, hope struggling with fear, and a desperate concentration.
Beatrice tried to say something comforting, something to dismiss the horror on the edge of both their minds, but in the face of Araminta's courage and unyielding desire for truth, she failed, and remained wordless.
Araminta stood up, leaned over and kissed her very lightly, a mere brus.h.i.+ng of the lips on her brow, and left the room.
Beatrice sat still for several minutes, then slowly sank farther down in the bed.
"You can take the tray away, Hester; I don't think I want any tea after all."
So she had not forgotten her nurse was there. Hester did not know whether to be grateful her status gave her such opportunity to observe or insulted that she was of such total unimportance that no one cared what she saw or heard. It was the first time in her life she had been so utterly disregarded, and it stung.
"Yes, Lady Moidore," she said coolly, and picked up the tray, leaving Beatrice alone with her thoughts.
That evening she had a little time to herself, and she spent it in the library. She had dined in the servants' hall. Actually it was one of the best meals she had ever eaten, far richer and more varied than she had experienced in her own home, even when her father's circ.u.mstances were very favorable. He had never served more than six courses, the heaviest usually either mutton or beef. Tonight there had been a choice of three meats, and eight courses in all.
She found a book on the peninsular campaigns of the Duke of Wellington, and was deeply engrossed in it when the door opened and Cyprian Moidore came in. He seemed surprised to see her, but not unpleasantly so.
"I am sorry to disturb you, Miss Latterly." He glanced at her book. "I am sure you have well deserved a little time to yourself, but I wanted you to tell me candidly what you think of my mother's health." He looked concerned, his face marked with anxiety and his eyes unwavering.
She closed the book and he saw the t.i.tle.
"Good heavens. Couldn't you find anything more interesting than that? We have plenty of novels, and some poetry-farther along to the right, I think."
"Yes I know, thank you. I chose this intentionally." She saw his doubt, then as he realized she was not joking, his puzzlement. "I think Lady Moidore is deeply concerned over the death of your sister," she hurried on. "And of course having the police in the house is unpleasant. But I don't think her health is in any danger of breakdown. Grief always takes a time to run its course. It is natural to be angry, and bewildered, especially when the loss is so unexpected. With an illness at least there is some time to prepare-"
He looked down at the table between them.
"Has she said anything about who she thinks to be responsible?"
"No-but I have not discussed the subject with her-except, of course, I should listen to anything she wished to tell me, if I thought it would relieve her anxiety."
He looked up, a sudden smile on his face. Given another place, away from his family and the oppressive atmosphere of suspicion and defense, and away from her position as a servant, she would have liked him. There was a humor in him, and an intelligence beneath the careful manners.
"You do not think we should call in a doctor?'' he pressed.
"I don't believe a doctor could help," she said frankly. She debated whether to tell him the truth of what she believed, or if it would only cause him greater concern and betray that she remembered and weighed what she overheard.
"What is it?" He caught her indecision and knew there was something more. "Please, Miss Latterly?"
She found herself responding from instinct rather than judgment, and a liking for him that was far from a rational decision.
"I think she is afraid she may know who it is who killed Mrs. Haslett, and that it will bring great distress to Mrs. Kel-lard," she answered. "I think she would rather retreat and keep silent than risk speaking to the police and having them somehow detect what she is thinking." She waited, watching his face.
"d.a.m.n Myles!" he said furiously, standing up and turning away. His voice was filled with anger, but there was remarkably little surprise in it. "Papa should have thrown him out, not Harry Haslett!" He swung back to face her. "I'm sorry, Miss Latterly. I beg your pardon for my language. I-"
"Please, Mr. Moidore, do not feel the need to apologize," she said quickly. "The circ.u.mstances are enough to make anyone with any feeling lose his temper. The constant presence of the police and the interminable wondering, whether it is spoken or not, would be intensely trying to anyone but a fool who had no understanding.''
'' You are very kind." It was a simple enough word, and yet she knew he meant it as no easy compliment.
"I imagine the newspapers are still writing about it?" she went on, more to fill the silence than because it mattered.
He sat down on the arm of the chair near her. "Every day,'' he said ruefully. "The better ones are castigating the police, which is unfair; they are no doubt doing all they can. They can hardly subject us to a Spanish Inquisition and torture us until someone confesses-" He laughed jerkily, betraying all his raw pain. "And the press would be the first to complain if they did. In fact it seems they are caught either way in a situation like this. If they are harsh with us they will be accused of forgetting their place and victimizing the gentry, and if they are lenient they will be charged with indifference and incompetence." He drew in his breath and let it out in a sigh. "I should imagine the poor devil curses the day he was clever enough to prove it had to be someone in the house. But he doesn't look like a man who takes the easy path-"
"No, indeed," Hester agreed with more memory and heart than Cyprian could know.
"And the sensational ones are speculating on every sordid possibility they can think up," he went on with distaste puckering his mouth and bringing a look of hurt to his eyes.
Suddenly Hester caught a glimpse of how deeply the whole intrusion was affecting him, the ugliness of it all pervading his life like a foul smell. He was keeping the pain within, as he had been taught since the nursery. Little boys are expected to be brave, never to complain, and above all never, never to cry. That was effeminate and a sign of weakness to be despised.
"I'm so sorry," she said gently. She reached out her hand and put it over his, closing her fingers, before she remembered she was not a nurse comforting a wounded man in hospital, she was a servant and a woman, putting her hand over her employer's in the privacy of his own library.
But if she withdrew it and apologized now she would only draw attention to the act and make it necessary for him to respond. They would both be embarra.s.sed, and it would rob the moment of its understanding and create of it a lie.
Instead she sat back slowly with a very slight smile.
She was prevented from having to think what to say next by the library door opening and Romola coming in. She glanced at them together and instantly her face darkened.
"Should you not be with Lady Moidore?'' she said sharply.
Her tone stung Hester, who kept her temper with an effort. Had she been free to, she would have replied with equal acerbity.
"No, Mrs. Moidore, her ladys.h.i.+p said I might have the evening to do as I chose. She decided to retire early."
"Then she must be unwell," Romola returned immediately. "You should be where she can call you if she needs you. Perhaps you could read in your bedroom, or write letters. Don't you have friends or family who will be expecting to hear from you?"
Cyprian stood up. "I'm sure Miss Latterly is quite capable of organizing her own correspondence, Romola. And she cannot read without first coming to the library to choose a book.''
Romola's eyebrows rose sarcastically. "Is that what you were doing, Miss Latterly? Forgive me, that was not what appearances suggested."
"I was answering Mr. Moidore's questions concerning his mother's health," Hester said very levelly.
"Indeed? Well if he is now satisfied you may return to your room and do whatever it is you wish."
Cyprian drew breath to reply, but his father came in, glanced at their faces, and looked inquiringly at his son.
"Miss Latterly believes that Mama is not seriously ill," Cyprian said with embarra.s.sment, obviously fis.h.i.+ng for a palatable excuse.
"Did anyone imagine she was?" Basil asked dryly, coming into the middle of the room.
"I did not," Romola said quickly. "She is suffering, of course-but so are we all. I know I haven't slept properly since it happened."
"Perhaps Miss Latterly would give you something that would help?" Cyprian suggested with a glance at Hester-and the shadow of a smile.
"Thank you, I shall manage by myself," Romola snapped. "And I intend to go and visit Lady Killin tomorrow afternoon."
"It is too soon," Basil said before Cyprian could speak. "I think you should remain at home for another month at least. By all means receive her if she calls here.''
"She won't call," Romola said angrily. "She will certainly feel uncomfortable and uncertain what to say-and one can hardly blame her for that."
"That is not material." Basil had already dismissed the matter.
"Then I shall call on her," Romola repeated, watching her father-in-law, not her husband.
Cyprian turned to speak to her, remonstrate with her, but again Basil overrode him.
"You are tired," he said coldly. "You had better retire to your room-and spend a quiet day tomorrow." There was no mistaking that it was an order. Romola stood as if undecided for a moment, but there was never any doubt in the issue. She would do as she was told, both tonight and tomorrow. Cyprian and his opinions were irrelevant.
Hester was acutely embarra.s.sed, not for Romola, who had behaved childishly and deserved to be reproved, but for Cyprian, who had been disregarded totally. She turned to Basil.
"If you will excuse me, sir, I will retire also. Mrs. Moidore made the suggestion that I should be in my room, in case Lady Moidore should need me." And with a brief nod at Cyprian, hardly meeting his eyes so she did not see his humiliation, and clutching her book, Hester went out across the hall and up the stairs.
Sunday was quite unlike any other day in the Moidore house, as indeed was the case the length and breadth of England. The ordinary duties of cleaning grates and lighting and stoking fires had to be done, and of course breakfast was served. Prayers were briefer than usual because all those who could would be going to church at least once in the day.
Beatrice chose not to be well enough, and no one argued with her, but she insisted that Hester should ride with the family and attend services. It was preferable to her going in the evening with the upper servants, when Beatrice might well need her.
Luncheon was a very sober affair with little conversation, according to Dinah's report, and the afternoon was spent in letter writing, or in Basil's case, he put on his smoking jacket and retired to the smoking room to think or perhaps to doze. Books and newspapers were forbidden as unfitting the sabbath, and the children were not allowed to play with their toys or to read, except Scripture, or to indulge in any games. Even musical practice was deemed inappropriate.
Supper was to be cold, to permit Mrs. Boden and the other upper servants to attend church. Afterwards the evening would be occupied by Bible reading, presided over by Sir Basil. It was a day in which no one seemed to find pleasure.
It brought childhood flooding back to Hester, although her father at his most pompous had never been so unrelievedly joyless. Since leaving home for the Crimea, although it was not so very long ago, she had forgotten how rigorously such rules were enforced. War did not allow such indulgences, and caring for the sick did not stop even for the darkness of night, let alone a set day of the week.
Hester spent the afternoon in the study writing letters. She would have been permitted to use the ladies' maids' sitting room, had she wished, but Beatrice did not need her, having decided to sleep, and it would be easier to write away from Mary's and Gladys's chatter.
She had written to Charles and Imogen, and to several of her friends from Crimean days, when Cyprian came in. He did not seem surprised to see her, and apologized only perfunctorily for the intrusion.
"You have a large family, Miss Latterly?" he said, noticing the pile of letters.
"Oh no, only a brother," she said. "The rest are to friends with whom I nursed during the war.''
"You formed such friends.h.i.+ps?" he asked curiously, interest quickening in his face. "Do you not find it difficult to settle back into life in England after such violent and disturbing experiences?"
She smiled, in mockery at herself rather than at him.
"Yes I do," she admitted candidly. "One had so much more responsibility; there was little time for artifice or standing upon ceremony. It was a time of so many things: terror, exhaustion, freedom, friends.h.i.+p that crossed all the normal barriers, honesty such as one cannot normally afford-"
He sat facing her, balancing on the arm of one of the easy chairs.
"I have read a little of the war in the newspapers,'' he said with a pucker between his brows. "But one never knows how accurate the accounts are. I fear they tell us very much what they wish us to believe. I don't suppose you have read any- no, of course not."
"Yes I have!" she contradicted immediately, forgetting in the heat of the discourse how improper it was for well-bred women to have access to anything but the social pages of a newspaper.
But he was not shocked, only the more interested.
"Indeed, one of the bravest and most admirable men I nursed was a war correspondent with one of London's best newspapers," she went on. "When he was too ill to write himself, he would dictate to me, and I sent his dispatches for him."