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"No, I'm not going to punish the bad kitty," I said, and Grimalkin snorted. "And you aren't, either. I want to talk to you. Will you stay and not run off if we let you go?"
He bobbed his head, as best he could while his ears were gripped tightly by Puck. "Master wants Razor to stay, Razor stay. Not move until told. Promise."
"All right." I glanced at Puck and nodded. "Let him go."
Puck raised an eyebrow. "You sure, princess? All I heard was static buzz and chipmunk chatter."
"I can understand him," I said, earning a dubious look from Puck and a gleam of keen interest from Grimalkin. "He promised not to move. Let him go."
He shrugged and opened his fist, dropping the gremlin to the cot again. Razor hit the mattress and instantly froze; not even his ears vibrated as he gazed up at me with expectant green eyes.
I blinked. "Uh, at ease," I muttered, and the gremlin plopped into a sit, still watching me intently. "Look, Razor, I think it's best if you leave. The camp is being evacuated right now. You can't stay here by yourself, and I don't think you'll be welcome where we're going."
"No leave!" Razor leaped up, his face eager. "Stay with Master. Go where Master goes. Razor can help!"
"You can't," I said, hating the way his ears drooped like a scolded puppy. "We're marching to war, and it'll be dangerous. You can't help us against the false king's army." He buzzed sadly, but I kept my voice firm. "Go home, Razor. Go back to Mag Tuiredh. Isn't that where you really want to be? With all the other gremlins?"
Grimalkin sighed loudly, causing me to look back and Razor to hiss at him. "Am I the only one here who has any insight at all?" he said, looking to each of our faces. We stared at him, and he shook his head. "Drawing a blank, are you? Think about what you just said, human. Repeat that last phrase, if you would."
I frowned. "Isn't that where you want to be?" "Isn't that where you want to be?"
He closed his eyes. "The next phrase, human."
"With all the other gremlins." He stared at me expectantly, and I raised my hands. " He stared at me expectantly, and I raised my hands. "What? What are you getting at, Grim?" What are you getting at, Grim?"
Grimalkin thumped his tail. "It is times like these I am ever more grateful that I am a cat," he sighed. "Why do you think I brought you that creature, human? To keep up my stalking skills? I a.s.sure you, they are quite adequate already. Please attempt to use the brain I know is hidden somewhere in that head. There are thousands of gremlins in Mag Tuiredh, perhaps hundreds of thousands. And who is the only person in the entire realm who can communicate with them?"
"Me." Suddenly what he was implying hit me full force. "The gremlins. There are thousands of them out there. And...and they listen to me."
"Bravo," Grimalkin deadpanned, rolling his eyes. "The lightbulb finally comes on."
"I can ask the gremlins to help us," I said, ignoring Grimalkin, who lay down and curled his tail around himself, his work apparently done. "I can go to Mag Tuiredh and..." I stopped, shaking my head. "No. No, I can't. I have to be there when we reach the Nevernever, or Oberon and Mab will try to kill Glitch and his army. They would think it's just another attack by the false king."
"You're probably right about that," Puck mused, crossing his arms. "Mab wouldn't hesitate, and even Oberon would chop first and ask questions later when it comes to the Iron fey." He glanced down at Razor, who was still watching me intently and c.o.c.king his head like a dog trying to understand. "What about Buzzsaw there? Could you send it back with a message to its friends, telling them what you want?"
"I guess I could try. What do we have to lose?" I turned to the gremlin, who sat up and flared his ears, ready and eager. "Razor, if I asked the other gremlins to help me, do you think they would come?"
"We help!" Razor bounced in place, grinning. "Razor help! Help Master, yes!"
I didn't know if that meant all the gremlins would help or just him, but I went on anyway. "I want you to take a message back to Mag Tuiredh. This is for all gremlins. Gather everyone who is willing to fight and meet us at the edge of the Iron Realm, where it meets the wyldwood. We have to stop the false king's moving tower before it hits the battlefront. Can you do that, Razor? Do you understand what I'm asking?"
"Razor understands!" the gremlin crowed, and leaped to the wall, flas.h.i.+ng his neon grin. "I help! Meet Master in funny elf lands! I go!" And before I could call him back, he scurried up the corner, slid through the slats in the vent, and disappeared.
Puck raised an eyebrow and glanced at me. "Do you think he really understood what you wanted?"
Grimalkin raised his head and gave me an annoyed look, as if I had just blown something he'd spent hours setting up. "I don't know," I murmured, watching the vent. "I guess we can only hope."
I DIDN'T SEE DIDN'T SEE A ASH all that evening, though I ignored Puck's advice and looked for him. The ruins, bustling with activity at first, eventually died down into a somber quiet as scores of faery rebels prepared to march to battle. Armor was cleaned, blades were sharpened, and Glitch vanished behind closed doors with several of his advisers and hacker elves, probably to discuss strategy. Puck, forever curious and viewing all private meetings as a personal challenge, told me he would find out what was going on and disappeared. Restless, nervous, and annoyed that I couldn't find Ash, I retreated to my room, where Grimalkin was curled in the middle of my bed and refused to scoot over so I could lie down. all that evening, though I ignored Puck's advice and looked for him. The ruins, bustling with activity at first, eventually died down into a somber quiet as scores of faery rebels prepared to march to battle. Armor was cleaned, blades were sharpened, and Glitch vanished behind closed doors with several of his advisers and hacker elves, probably to discuss strategy. Puck, forever curious and viewing all private meetings as a personal challenge, told me he would find out what was going on and disappeared. Restless, nervous, and annoyed that I couldn't find Ash, I retreated to my room, where Grimalkin was curled in the middle of my bed and refused to scoot over so I could lie down.
"Grimalkin, move!" I snapped after trying and failing to ease him over. He rumbled a growl as I pushed at him, flexing his very sharp claws, and I quickly pulled my hand back. Golden eyes slitted open and glared at me.
"I am rather weary, human," Grimalkin warned, flattening his ears in a rare but dangerous show of temper. "Considering I spent all night tracking down that gremlin, I would politely ask that you let me sleep before we go trekking down the same path we just came from. If you are looking for the Winter prince, he is up on the balcony with the insect things." Grimalkin sniffed and closed his eyes. "Why not go pester him for a while?"
My heart leaped. "Ash? Ash is on the balcony?"
Grimalkin sighed. "Why do humans deem it necessary to repeat everything that is told them?" he mused, but I was already out the door.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE.
FERRUM'S PAST The rebels shot me curious, annoyed looks as I jogged through the base, dodging hacker elves gathering up their computers, stammering apologies as I wove my way through the crowds. Reaching the stairs to the balcony, I took them two at a time but slowed when I came to the landing. Remembering what Puck said about intruders and hurled icicles, I peeked cautiously around the corner.
Ash stood on the edge of the landing, his back to me, the wind tugging at his hair and cloak. Overhead, dark red clouds blotted out the moon, and tiny flakes of gray danced on the breeze, dissolving to powder when they touched my skin. A fine coating of dust covered the balcony, m.u.f.fling my footsteps as I eased through the arch. I knew Ash heard me from the tilt of his head, but he didn't turn around.
"It's unbelievable," he whispered, his eyes gazing out over the landscape. In the distance, a thread of poisonous green lightning crawled under the belly of the clouds, and the air turned sharp and chemical. "To think this was once the Nevernever. To know that it could all turn into this..." He slowly shook his head. "It would be the end of us. Faery would be extinct forever. Everything I knew, places that have stood since the beginning of time, gone."
"We won't let that happen," I said firmly, joining him at the edge. "The false king will be stopped, and this will go back to normal. I'm not going to let everything disappear."
He didn't say anything to that, continuing to gaze over the landscape. Silence fell, thick and uncomfortable. The wind whipped at my hair, howling across the distance between us. I could sense both of us wanting to speak, to break the awkwardness of unspoken apologies, until the quiet grew more than I could bear. "I'm sorry, Ash," I murmured at last. "For what I said earlier. I didn't mean it."
He gave his head a small shake. "No. You shouldn't apologize." With a sigh, he raked a hand through his hair, still not looking at me. "I'm the one who taught you to fight, to take care of yourself. I have no right to be angry when you prove yourself capable of every lesson I gave you."
"I had a pretty good teacher."
He smiled, very faintly, though his eyes remained dark, his gaze on the clouds sweeping the horizon. "You're not the same girl I met when you first came to the Nevernever, searching for your brother," he said softly. "You've grown...changed. You're stronger now, like she was." He didn't say her name, but I knew whom he meant. Ariella, the love he lost to a wyvern attack long before we ever met. "She was always the strong one," Ash continued, his voice barely above a murmur. "Even the Winter Court couldn't crush her spirit, turn her spiteful and cruel. She was better than all of us. But I couldn't save her." He closed his eyes, clenching his fists with the memory. "She died because I failed to protect her. I can't..." His voice trembled, just a little, and he took a quiet breath. "I can't watch that happen to you."
"I'm not her," I said, slipping my arm through his. "You're not going to lose me, I promise."
He s.h.i.+vered, glancing at me from the corner of his eyes. "Meghan," he began, and I could sense his unease. "There's something...I haven't told you. I should have explained before but...I was afraid it would be a self-fulfilling prophecy if you knew." He paused a moment, as if waiting for me to say something. When I didn't, he took a deep breath. "Long ago," he began, "someone told me that I would be cursed in love, that those I came to cherish would be torn from me, that as long as I remained soulless, I would lose everyone I truly cared for."
My heart stopped for a moment, then picked up again, faster than before. "Who told you that?"
"A very old druid priestess." He seemed hesitant now, and I caught a flicker of dark blue regret from the corner of my eye. "This was before Ariella, back in the ancient times, when humans still feared and wors.h.i.+pped the old G.o.ds and had all sorts of rituals for keeping us out, which of course only challenged us to find ways around them. I was much younger then, and my brothers and I would play our cruel games with the mortals, particularly with the young, silly females we came across." He paused, tilting his head back slightly, gauging my reaction.
"Go on," I murmured.
He sighed, and very gently freed himself from my hand, turning to face me. "There was a girl," he said, choosing his words very carefully, "barely sixteen in mortal years, and as innocent as they came. Her favorite pastime was picking flowers and playing in the creek at the edge of the forest. I knew, because I watched her from the trees. She was always alone, carefree, so naive to the dangers in the woods." A hint of bitterness crept into his voice, a dark loathing for the faery in the story. I felt cold as he continued in a soft, flat voice. "I lured her into the forest with pretty words and gifts and promises of affection. I made sure she fell in love with me, that no other human male would ever make her feel what I could, and then I took it all away. I told her that mortals were nothing to the fey, that she was nothing. I told her that it was a game, nothing more, and that the game was now over. I broke more than her heart; I broke her spirit, broke her. And I reveled in it."
I had been waiting for it, but it still made me sick, the knowledge that Ash could be that heartless, just another capricious fey toying with human emotion. This girl, sixteen, lonely, eager for love, had been like me once. If I had been at the edge of the woods that day, instead of her, Ash would've done the same to me.
"What happened to her?" I asked when he fell silent again. Ash closed his eyes.
"She died," he said simply. "She couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, couldn't do anything but pine away, until her body grew so weak it simply gave out."
"And you felt horribly guilty about it?" I guessed, trying to glean some sort of moral from this tale, a lesson learned or something like that. But Ash shook his head with a bitter smile.
"I didn't think twice about her," he said, das.h.i.+ng my hopes and making my gut twist. "Not having a soul frees us from any sort of conscience. She was only a human, and a foolish one at that, to fall in love with a faery. She wasn't the first, nor would she be the last. But her grandmother, the high priestess of the girl's clan, was not so foolish. She sought me out, and told me what I just told you-she cursed me, promised that I would be destined to lose everyone I truly cared for, that it was the price for being soulless. Of course, I just laughed it off as the superst.i.tions of a weakling mortal...until I fell in love with Ariella." His voice grew even softer. "And now, with you."
He turned away and gazed out over the edge again. "When Ariella was taken from me, I suddenly understood. We don't have a conscience, but falling in love changes things. I understood what I had put that girl through, the pain she suffered because of me. I told myself I wouldn't make the mistake of caring for someone again." He gave a bitter chuckle and shook his head. "And then you came along and ruined all that."
I couldn't answer. I kept seeing that girl, and the dark, handsome stranger she fell for, died for. "Why are you telling me this?" I whispered.
"Because, I want you to understand what I am." Ash looked down at me, solemn and grim. "I'm not a human with pointed ears, Meghan. I am and will always be Fey. Soulless. Immortal. Because of my actions that day, someone I loved died. And now, here we are, on the brink of war and-" He stopped and looked down, his voice dropping to a near whisper. "And I'm afraid. I'm afraid I'll fail you like I did Ariella, that the crimes of my past will ruin any chance we have at a future. That you'll realize who I really am, what I really am, and when I turn around you'll be gone."
He stopped, the wind whipping at his hair and clothes, swirling ashes into the silence. A glider on the wall turned its head and buzzed sleepily. Ash's posture was stiff, his back and shoulders rigid, steeled for my reaction. Bracing himself to hear footsteps walking back down the stairs. I saw his shoulders tremble and caught the faint aura of fear before he could hide it.
I stepped close and slipped my arms around his waist, hearing his quiet intake of breath as I pulled him against me. "That was a long time ago," I murmured, pressing my cheek to his back, listening to his thudding heart. "You've changed since then. That Ash wouldn't protect a silly human girl with his life, or become her knight, or walk into exile with her. Every step of the way, you've always been there, right beside me. I'm not letting you go now."
"I'm a coward." Ash's voice was subdued. "If I cared for you as much as I should, I would end my life and the curse along with it. My existence puts you in danger. If I were no longer here-"
"Don't you dare, Ashallyn'darkmyr Tallyn." I held him tighter, even as he flinched at the sound of his True Name. "Don't you dare throw your life away for an unknown superst.i.tion. If you die-" My voice broke, and I swallowed thickly. "I love you," I whispered, fisting my hands against his stomach. "You can't leave. You swore you wouldn't."
Ash's hands came to rest over mine, twining our fingers together. "Even if the world stands against you," he murmured, bowing his head. "I promise."
WE STAYED ON THE BALCONY that night, sitting against the wall, watching the storm sweep over the outlying hills. We didn't say much, content just to be near each other, lost in our own thoughts. When we did speak, it was of the war and the rebels and other, present-day things, staying far from the past...or the future. I dozed several times, waking with his arms around me and my head against his shoulder. that night, sitting against the wall, watching the storm sweep over the outlying hills. We didn't say much, content just to be near each other, lost in our own thoughts. When we did speak, it was of the war and the rebels and other, present-day things, staying far from the past...or the future. I dozed several times, waking with his arms around me and my head against his shoulder.
The next thing I knew, he was shaking me awake. The night had moved on, and a pinkish light glowed against the distant horizon.
"Meghan, wake up."
"Hmm?" I yawned, rubbing my eyes. Sleeping in armor while leaning against a wall, I realized, was proving to be a bad idea, as my backside throbbed with pain. "Time to go already?"
"No." Ash stepped to the edge of the balcony. "Come look at this. Hurry."
I peered out over the edge. At first, I couldn't see anything, but then the light gleamed off something s.h.i.+ny and metallic on the horizon. I squinted, s.h.i.+elding my eyes with my hand. Could that be the glint of metal armor? Or the s.h.i.+ny top of an iron beetle? My blood ran cold.
"They're coming," Ash muttered, and I stumbled back from the edge.
"We have to tell Glitch!"
I scrambled back from the landing, Ash close behind me. As we flew down the stairs, it quickly became clear that Glitch already knew. The camp was in chaos, rebels rus.h.i.+ng back and forth, grabbing weapons and throwing on armor. Those who had been wounded the day before hurried out with freshly bandaged wounds, limping or carrying those who couldn't walk.
"There you are!" Puck met us at the foot of the stairs, rolling his eyes as we came charging down. "Another army on the way and you two are playing kissy-face on the balcony. Suit up. Looks like there's going to be another fight."
"Where's Glitch?" I said as we hurried through the ruins, dodging rebels. "What is he thinking? We can't fight another army now! Too many are hurt, and another fight could crush them."
"Doesn't seem like we have much choice, princess," Puck said as I spotted the rebel leader arguing with Diode under the limbs of the giant tree. Glitch's face was strained, and the hacker elf's eyes whirled and spun as he gestured frantically.
"Glitch!" I sprinted up to him, dodging a hound, which snarled as I barely avoided a collision. "Hey, I need to talk to you!" Glitch looked up and winced when he saw who it was.
"What do you want, your highness? I'm a little busy at the moment."
"What are you doing?" I asked as I caught up, Diode scrambling aside. "You can't make your people fight now! We're about to join Summer and Winter and we need everyone we can get. If you fight now, so soon after the last battle, you could lose everyone!"
"I'm aware of that, your highness!" Glitch snapped in return, his spikes flaring angrily. "But we don't have much of a choice, do we? We can't run-they'll just hunt us down out there. We can't hide-there's really nowhere to go. All we can do is make our stand here. Thankfully, that's not the false king's full army, just a few attack squads. The real army is still on its way to the wyldwood, with the moving fortress I might add, and if we don't take care of this little problem now, we won't have a chance of joining Summer and Winter. Now, get out of my way. I should be at the front when the fighting starts."
"Wait!" I grabbed his sleeve as he brushed past, and he whirled angrily. "There is one more option. We came up through the packrat tunnels beneath the tower. We could escape that way."
"The tunnels?" Glitch shook off my hand. "Those tunnels run for miles. It's a gigantic maze down there. We could wander for days."
"Not me." I still didn't know how I was so familiar with the tunnels, but once I said the words, I knew they were true. "I know the way. I can get everyone through safely."
He looked disbelieving, and my temper flared. "It's either that or lose everyone before the war even starts! Dammit, Glitch, you have to start trusting me!"
"Do it," Ash said softly, locking gazes with the Iron faery. "You know she's right."
Glitch sighed noisily, stabbing his hands through his hair. "You sure you know the way?" he asked me.
"I wouldn't be here if I didn't."
"All right," he said slowly. "Fine. We'll put our lives in your hands once more, your highness. Diode, spread the word. Tell everyone to meet at the central chamber and be ready to march."
"Yes, sir." Diode shot me a relieved look and scampered off. Glitch watched him go, then turned to glare at me with narrowed violet eyes. "This better work. You're a gigantic pain in the a.s.s, you know that, your highness?"
"One who's about to save yours," I returned, earning an appreciative snort from Puck. Glitch rolled his eyes and stalked off, and we made our way to the center of the ruins.
NOT FIFTEEN MINUTES LATER, the entire rebel army was gathered beneath the branches of the great oak, armed and armored, ready to march. I was wondering how quickly we could get all the rebels down into the tunnels when Diode approached and informed us the trapdoor we came through wasn't the only one, that there were several scattered throughout the tower, and one of them was in the center chamber, right below the tree. He was pointing out that it was buried and nearly hidden in the roots of the oak, when Glitch came in, his hair snapping wildly as he leaped onto the trunk. the entire rebel army was gathered beneath the branches of the great oak, armed and armored, ready to march. I was wondering how quickly we could get all the rebels down into the tunnels when Diode approached and informed us the trapdoor we came through wasn't the only one, that there were several scattered throughout the tower, and one of them was in the center chamber, right below the tree. He was pointing out that it was buried and nearly hidden in the roots of the oak, when Glitch came in, his hair snapping wildly as he leaped onto the trunk.
"They're almost to the tower. We need to go, now!"
Working together, Ash, Puck, and Glitch hauled up the trapdoor, letting it drop open with a ringing clang that echoed throughout the room. Straightening, Glitch looked to me and gestured to the gaping hole, leading down into darkness. "After you, your highness. Diode, go with the princess to make sure everyone knows to follow her."
"What about you?"
"I'm staying topside to make sure everyone is through." Glitch nodded to the stocky dwarf with the mechanical arm, waiting stoically behind us. "When everyone is down, Torque and I will follow and seal the tunnel behind us. We're likely not coming back here again."
"But-"
"I'll worry about blocking our escape, you worry about not getting us lost down there." Glitch handed me a flashlight and pointed to the hole. "Now move, before they're at our door!"