Her Guilty Secret Part 12

'You call telling me what I already know "some progress"?' he snapped irritably, and Kate wished she could wash her hands of the whole affair.

'It takes time to gain people's confidence,' she said. 'I don't want to draw attention to myself. If I start asking a lot of awkward questions, Mr Kellerman will become-suspicious. If he does and throws me out, I'll have wasted my time and your money.'

'My money? Oh, yeah.' Henry Sawyer chewed on his lower lip. 'It wouldn't do to waste that, would it?' His eyes narrowed. 'I might just decide I want it back.'

'Not a chance.' Kate was angry now. How dared he sit there patronising her, and behaving as if he was doing her a favour by calling in? 'My time is money, Mr Sawyer. I explained that before I agreed to take the case. And by my reckoning, your payments are now in arrears. Now, if you don't like what I'm doing, I'll give you an invoice showing what's been spent and then you can settle the balance.'

'That won't be necessary.' His voice was sulky now, and she breathed a little easier knowing she had had her say. 'But, well, Mr-that is, me-I'm getting really worried,' he muttered disjointedly. 'In another week or so it'll be three months since she disappeared.'

Kate wished she felt like sympathising with him, but the more she saw of Henry Sawyer, the more convinced she became that Alicia had left of her own accord. She couldn't imagine what the woman had ever seen in him, unless it was Alicia's disappearance that had caused him to lose interest in himself.

Having given her another substantial sum of money, he left soon afterwards with Kate's promise that she'd be in touch if she had any news. She had his address, though no phone number, she noticed. Evidently Mr Sawyer preferred to do business face to face.

She got home about half-past seven to find a note from her mother propped beside the kettle. It appeared that Ellen Ross had taken Joanne to the cinema in Bath and they wouldn't be back untilfairly late. Kate remembered now that Joanne had mentioned the film she wanted to see and her grandmother must have decided to treat her. Kate guessed her daughter would welcome any chance to get out of the house.

Which reminded her of what Alex Kellerman had said about bringing Joanne down to the stables.

But it had been mooted when she had had lunch with him and his daughter and it hadn't been mentioned since. Of course, she hadn't seen much of him since Sam Guthrie's return to work.

Had he meant it, or was it just something he'd said in pa.s.sing? After all, it had been Rachel who'd expressed a desire to meet her.

But there was no denying that Joanne would have loved the chance to visit the stables. She'd never had much to do with horses, but she loved all animals and it was only because of the local council's regulations that she didn't have a pet at the flat. Still, it probably wasn't the most sensible thing to do in the circ.u.mstances. She was already regretting her involvement with Alex Kellerman. It would be most unwise to involve her daughter as well.

Ellen had left Kate's evening meal in the oven. It was giving off an appetising aroma of meat and onions, but when Kate lifted the ca.s.serole onto the hob it quickly lost its appeal. At least an hour stewing in its own juices had left the meal looking dark and rubbery, and a burnt skin of gravy clung to the edges of the dish.

Deciding she'd rather make herself an omelette later, Kate hung her coat in the closet and went into her bedroom. Turning on the lamp, she dropped her bag on the bed and viewed her reflection in the dressing-table mirror. She looked as dejected as she felt, she thought dully, pulling the elastic band from her braid and threading her fingers through her loosened hair. Was she really cut out to be an investigator? she wondered. Wouldn't she be happier if she was working at the stables for real?

She suspected the answer was yes, which meant that Henry Sawyer had some justification for his impatience. Was he right? Was Alex Kellerman really a dangerous man? One thing was certain and that was that her loyalties were becoming hopelessly divided. She was a fool. Any dimwit would know better than to get personally involved with a case.

Abandoning such depressing thoughts, she went into the bathroom. A soak in the tub was what she needed, she determined, turning on the taps. And then afterwards she might open a bottle of wine, she thought, peeling off her s.h.i.+rt and bra. She'd forget all about Alex Kellerman and Henry Sawyer. By the time her mother and Joanne got back, she'd be feeling pleasantly mellow.

She was drying herself when she heard someone ringing the doorbell. She'd taken the portable radio into the bathroom with her so she couldn't be sure how long the ringing had been going on.

It couldn't be her mother and Joanne. Her mother would have used her key. Unless she'd lost it.

Kate frowned, reaching for her velvet sweatpants. Either way, she was going to have to find out.

The loose-fitting s.h.i.+rt that matched the purple sweatpants clung to her damp body, but she couldn't help it. It was better than wrapping a towel about herself to go to the door. The pants clung to her legs, too, but at least her body was drying. Her hair was another matter, and she scooped it up into a knot on top of her head.

She half hoped the ringing would have stopped by the time she got there, but it hadn't, and she secured the safety chain before opening the door. It was just a precaution, and she doubted it would hold a determined a.s.sailant, but her mother felt safer with the st.u.r.dy chain in place.

However, her jaw sagged when she saw who had disturbed her. Alex Kellerman was standing in the corridor outside. 'h.e.l.lo,' he said stiffly. 'I hope I'm not interrupting anything.'

Kate didn't know what to say; what to think even. She couldn't imagine why he might have come to see her, unless by some awful mistake on her part he'd found out who she was.

'I-no,' she said now, putting a nervous hand up to her damp hair. 'I-I was just getting out of the bath, that's all.' She licked her dry lips. 'Have you been waiting long?'

'Not long,' he replied, with a dismissing shrug of his shoulders. He was wearing a dark blue three-piece suit this evening and the more formal clothes added to his darkly sensual appeal. 'I saw your car downstairs, as it happens. I took the chance that you might be in.'

'Oh-yes.' Kate acknowledged the fact with a s.h.i.+ver of awareness. It reminded her of how vulnerable she was. Thank goodness he'd known where to find her. If he'd asked someone for directions, they might have mistaken him for a client. It was frightening to think she could have been found out.

'I expect you're wondering what I'm doing here,' he said now, and she realised she'd have to remove the safety chain. Despite her misgivings, she couldn't go on talking to him through the crack.

'You'd better come in,' she said, putting the chilliness she was feeling down to the draught that blew along the corridor. She unfastened the chain and opened the door. 'It's through there.'

'Thanks.'

Although she stepped aside, he still brushed her arm as he went past her into the living room of the flat. She wondered if he was as aware of it as she was. Probably not, she reflected wryly. For the past few days, he'd seemed more than willing to forget that he'd wanted them to be friends.

Because he hadn't meant it, she chided herself irritably, closing the door and following him along the hall. The last thing he'd have wanted was for there to be any unpleasantness between them while Rachel was visiting. He'd needed someone to go with him to fetch his daughter and she'd been available. Giving her lunch had been for Rachel's sake, not hers.

He was standing in the middle of the floor when she entered the lamplit living room, and Kate was immediately conscious of how ill-at-ease he looked. He didn't belong here, she thought.

Despite his notoriety, he belonged in more elegant surroundings. In his expensive suit and hand-made shoes, he made the modest room look cheap.

'Do you want to sit down?' she asked offhandedly, gesturing towards the sofa. Then, smoothing her sweating palms over her rear, she said, 'Can I offer you a drink?'

'I don't want anything right now,' Alex said, but he subsided onto the edge of the sofa. He glanced about him with what Kate was sure was feigned interest. 'I've often wondered what your home was like.'

'So now you know.' Kate's bare feet curled into the rust-coloured carpet. 'It's nothing like Jamaica Hill, as you can see. But we like it.' She gripped the backs of her thighs self-consciously.

'Is something wrong? Is that why you're here?'

His eyes seemed mesmerised by her nervous probing. He'd been watching her hands, but now he dragged his gaze up to her face. There was a certain satisfaction to be gained from the fact that he had to look up at her. It was an advantage that she'd never had before.

'No,' he replied now, his low voice fairly sc.r.a.ping over her nerves. 'As a matter of fact, I came to see Joanne.'

'Joanne?' Kate couldn't hide her astonishment. 'Um-well, she's not here. She's gone to the movies with my mother.'

'A pity,' he said, seeming to see that as his cue to get to his feet again. 'Then I suppose there's no point in asking what time she'll be home?'

Kate shook her head. 'They've gone into Bath,' she murmured. 'I could give her a message.'

His green eyes darkened. 'Yeah, I guess you could,' he agreed. 'But I'd prefer to speak to her myself.'

Kate stepped back. 'All right,' she said. 'If it's something private.'

'It's not.' He took a breath. 'Perhaps I just wanted an excuse to come and see you again.'

'I don't think so.' Kate gave him a thin smile. 'You can see me any time. I'm still working at the stables, you know.'

'I know.'

Hisgaze was disturbingly intent and Kate wondered why he'd really come here. She didn't buy his story about speaking to Joanne. Yet he knew she lived here with her mother and daughter, so he could hardly have antic.i.p.ated that she would be alone.

'Tell me,' he said, taking a deliberate step towards her, and Kate had to steel herself not to panic as she'd done in the library at Jamaica Hill, 'what do you really think of me? Do I scare you? Do you still have doubts about my innocence, about the way Pam died?'

Kate pulled a breath deep into her lungs before answering him. 'You don't scare me,' she insisted firmly, but that wasn't all he'd asked and she knew it.

'But you're not sure if I was to blame for Pamela's accident,' he stated flatly. His expression hardened. 'Well, at least I know where I stand.'

'I didn't mean-'

'Tell Joanne I'll be in touch with her in the next few days,' he said, stepping around her, and before she could gather her thoughts he'd reached the living-room door.

'No. Wait-' she began, knowing she couldn't let him go thinking the worst of her, and his shoulders slumped as he swung back against the jamb.

'What?' he demanded harshly. 'Oh, right. You don't want Joanne anywhere near me.'

'It's not that-'

'Then what is it? Some new excuse for not inviting her to Jamaica Hill?'

'No.' Kate sighed, and then, reluctantly, she closed the s.p.a.ce between them. 'I-I do think you're innocent. I don't think you-deliberately-brought about your wife's death.'

Alex tipped his head back against the frame of the door behind him and looked at her through his lashes. 'Is that supposed to be an apology?' he asked. 'You don't think I deliberately put Jackson in that stall?' He gave a bitter laugh. 'But you do think I put the horse in there, don't you?

Whether by accident, or simple misjudgement, I'm to blame?'

Kate's hair was starting to come loose from its band, and, pulling it off, she thrust her fingers into the damp ma.s.s of curls. 'I don't know what to think,' she admitted helplessly. 'I wasn't there. I don't know all the facts. But I don't believe you're guilty. Isn't that enough?'

Alex expelled a weary breath. 'I guess it's going to have to be.'

He sounded totally defeated, and Kate suppressed an almost irresistible urge to scream. She wanted to tell him she trusted him, that there was no way he could have hurt his wife, but the reason why she wanted to believe him was what really held her back.

He was turning towards the outer door when she spoke again. 'What-what you said,' she murmured. 'About-about inviting Joanne to the stables. Is that really why you came tonight?'

'What else?'

His response was m.u.f.fled. Deliberately, she suspected. He was feeling in his pocket for his car keys and the words were lost as he reached for the latch. Which was when Kate reacted, when she knew she couldn't let him go like this, and, shouldering past him, she pressed her back against the door.

'Don't go.'

'Why not?' Alex's expression didn't alter. 'I'm sure you'd rather I left before your mother and daughter get home.'

Kate hesitated for a moment and then surrendered to a force stronger than herself. 'They won't be home for hours,' she told him huskily. 'At least stay and have a drink.'

Alex stepped away from the door. 'I don't think that would be entirely wise in the present circ.u.mstances,' he said tightly.

'Why not?' She threw his words back at him now. Then she asked audaciously, 'Have you got something more important to do?'

His lips twisted. 'I think so.'

She couldn't stop herself. 'What?'

'Getting out of here,' he answered, without emotion. 'Now, do you want to get out of the way so that I can open the door?'

'And if I don't?'

His lips parted to deliver what she was sure would have been a pa.s.sionate response, but then he seemed to gather himself and when he spoke again his voice was low and controlled. 'Let's stop playing games, shall we? We both know what would happen if I accepted your invitation, and I have no desire to be accused of hara.s.sing you again.'

Kate was indignant. 'I didn't accuse you of hara.s.sing me,' she protested, and he gave her a weary look.

'No. Okay. You didn't accuse me of it, but you d.a.m.n near sprinted out of the library the last time I laid a hand on you.'

Kate bent her head. 'That woman came in.'

'Lacey; right.' He conceded the point. 'But you weren't exactly-co-operating before that.'

'No.' Kate had to admit that was true.

'No.' He breathed deeply. 'Point taken, I think.'

Kate frowned. 'But-didn't you care?'

His eyes narrowed. 'Yeah. I cared like h.e.l.l.'

'No.' She shook her head. 'I meant about-about Mrs Sheridan interrupting us.'

'Not particularly.'

'But you must have done.'

'Why?'

'Well-you're close friends.'

His nostrils flared. 'Kate, I've known Lacey for more than ten years, and if she chooses to walk into my house unannounced she can't complain if what she sees doesn't meet with her unqualified approval.'

'Do you think she'd have walked out again?'

He grimaced. 'Knowing Lacey, I doubt it.'

'There you are, then.'

'What? Are you saying her arrival gave you the excuse to go haring out of there as if the devil himself was at your heels? For G.o.d's sake, a stranger would have thought I'd been a.s.saulting you!' Then he gave a cynical snort. 'Well, h.e.l.l, I suppose I was.'

'You weren't.' Kate spoke impulsively, and then had to stand his disbelieving appraisal. 'It-it wasn't like that,' she muttered awkwardly. 'I-I provoked you, like you said. I had no right to criticise your way of dealing with-with your life.'

Alex's dark brows arched. 'And that gave me the right to take advantage of you?' he asked mockingly, and she sighed.

'You're making this very hard.'

'Perhaps that's my purpose in life.'

'What?'

'To make things hard for people.'