Populazzi. Part 23

Nate looked my way. I ducked farther back into the shadows just in time. I was still way too close. I slid into the laundry room as he launched into his hard-rocking chorus.

"Suc-suc-succubus

My rotting heart is covered in pus.

Suc-suc-succubus

The putrid corpse of the two of us. "

I wondered which death would be less painful: running myself through the washer or the dryer.

"That guy is megatalented. How often do you hear the word 'putrid' in a song?"

It was Eddie Riegert. I wanted to disappear. "You're not going to tell him I'm in here, are you?" I asked. "Are you kidding? He's got the whole crowd with him. You think I'm gonna get in the way of that?"

Sure enough, all the party guests were singing along now. "Suc-suc-succubus / My rotting heart is covered in pus..."

"I swear, he wasn't even interested in me when we were together," I told Eddie. "I don't get it."

"He's e-mo," Eddie said, dragging out the word. "For emotional. He feels things deeper than the rest of us." Then he looked at me and smirked. "But you know all about that, right? That's your scene."

From the way he said it, I had a feeling he already knew the truth.

"It's not really my scene," I admitted. I waited for him to start asking questions, but he didn't. He hopped up to sit on the was.h.i.+ng machine.

"So tell me about yourself, Cara Leonard." He eyed the six cups of snacks I'd put on the dryer. "Hungry?"

I blushed and shook my head, so Eddie started snacking on the chips. He watched me, apparently waiting for me to start talking.

It was funny: I'd spent the past couple weeks dying for a guy to show even the slightest curiosity about who I really was. Now I was sitting with a Penultimate who was asking me to talk ... and I had no idea what to say.

"Um ... maybe we could take turns. You could tell me about yourself, too."

"Sure. You first."

"Ummm..."

Why were only the most random and bizarre things popping into my head?

"Okay ... I won't eat Hershey's Miniatures because I met the walk-around ones at Hersheypark when I was little and can't stand to see them hunted for food."

"That's ... weird."

What I really needed was the human version of an electric dog collar. Whenever I was about to say something stupid, it could shock me into silence.

"Your turn," I said.

"I regularly scarf Hershey's Miniatures. By the handful." "Oh."

"That was a joke, Cara," he said.

"Oh. Sorry." I forced a laugh.

"Okay, it wasn't like a laugh-out-loud joke. Are you always this nervous?"

"I'm not nervous," I said.

"Whatever. How about we make it easier. You said you want to know about me?"

I nodded.

"Okay, grab a cup of snacks and settle in. Here goes."

Eddie told me his whole story. He was the youngest of four, and his sister and brothers were all at least fifteen years older than him. He was the accident.

"When I was nine, my parents sat me down and said, 'Eddie, honey, we love you, but we're old. We're tired of parenting. You keep your grades above a C, you don't get any girls pregnant, we die happy. Everything else, you do what you want.'"

"They said that to you? Were you devastated?"

"Why? I thought they were pretty simple rules to live by."

"You didn't feel like they were rejecting you?"

Eddie squinched his face at me. The conversation had gone much better when I'd stayed out of it. Maybe I'd invent that human electric dog collar myself.

"Tell me more," I said.

He did. He said he played varsity football, basketball, and baseball and really wanted to get a sports scholars.h.i.+p to college. None of his siblings had gotten any financial aid for their education, and he wanted to give his parents a break.

"Oh, and I've already been married," he said.

"You ... what?"

It was his sister Suzanne's idea. It had happened when Eddie was three and Suzanne was eighteen. Suzanne's best friend had a little sister Eddie's age, and the two older kids thought it would be fun to throw a wedding. They arranged a huge ceremony and reception. Suzanne and her friends catered, decorated, hired a band ... More than a hundred guests came, including Eddie's other siblings, who flew in for the occasion. Eddie wore a tux, the bride a gown, and the ceremony was performed by Eddie's uncle, a true ordained minister.

"Everyone played it up. My mom cried; the girl and I fed each other cake; people made toasts. The party went on till way after my bedtime. I seriously thought I was legally married until I was twelve."

"That's crazy! Were you mad when you found out the truth?"

"Why would I be mad? It was funny."

I laughed. He may have been a Populazzi, but Eddie was really easy to talk to. Listen to, really. He had all kinds of stories, and we sat in his laundry room for ages as he told them to me. I was surprised when my cell alarm beeped-I'd been having so much fun, I hadn't even realized how much time had pa.s.sed.

"My time's up?" Eddie asked.

"No, it's..." I hated to say it out loud. "I have to get back for curfew."

"No problem. I haven't heard any singing for a while, so I bet you're safe." He peeked into the living room. "Yeah, Nate's gone. You're cool."

"You practically spent your whole party hiding out with me," I said as we left the laundry room. "I'm so sorry."

"Why?"

I had no good answer for that.

"Besides," he said, "it's not the whole party. This thing's going on all night."

I wasn't sure if that was supposed to make me feel better or worse. I couldn't linger on it, though, because right in front of me was the most incredible thing I'd ever seen.

Claudia was still cuddled up on the love seat with Marsh-only now they were completely making out.

This was huge. This was huger than huge.

This was also a problem. We had to leave now, but there was no way in the universe I'd interrupt the biggest moment in Claudia's life.

Eddie understood. "I got it," he said. He walked over and punched Marsh on the arm. "Dude, she's gotta go."

Marsh and Claudia reluctantly pulled apart. "I'll walk you out," he told her. He took her hand and the four of us walked to my car. Neither Claudia nor I said anything, but we kept sneaking glances at each other, asking a million silent questions.

We split at the car, Eddie walking to the driver's side with me while Claudia and Marsh kissed.

"Thanks for keeping me company," I said.

"No worries. It was fun."

"For me, too. Thanks." I had just said thanks about two seconds ago. Maybe what I really needed was a thesaurus implanted in my brain. I climbed into the car as a breathless Claudia collapsed into the seat next to me. I was about to drive off when Eddie signaled for me to roll down the window.

"What's up?" I asked.

"See you at school Monday," he said-then leaned in and kissed me. On the lips. Nothing major, nothing wild, but a kiss. What did it mean?

Claudia grinned as we pulled away from the curb. "Looks like your next target on the Ladder has chosen you ... succubus."

"Okay, Miss I-Hook-Up-with-Populazzi! Tell me!"

"'This bud of love, by summer's ripening breath, / May prove a beauteous flower when next we meet.'" Claudia sighed.

"Nope. Won't cut it. I need details."

For the first time ever, Claudia couldn't find words. She tried-she opened her mouth like she was going to say something-but all that finally came out was a scream of delight.

"Tell me!"

"I know Marsh and I go to different schools and we don't live close to each other, but in a way I think that's perfect. It's so much more romantic. We have to pine for each other. And it keeps me a challenge: he'll work to win me over again every time we meet. Especially since he's competing against my ex-boyfriend Paris, who's dying to get back together."

"You named your fake ex-boyfriend Paris?"

"It felt appropriate."

"What would you have done if he knew Romeo and Juliet?"

"Chalked the name up to an incredible coincidence. And gone back to kissing him. Immediately."

"Okay," I said, "keep in mind this is crazy because I have no idea if Eddie's even into me ... but what if you started going out with Marsh and I started going out with Eddie? They're friends-the four of us would hang out together all the time."

"I love it! We'll be like the four lovers at the end of Midsummer Night's Dream. Can I be Hermia? I always wanted to be Hermia."

"You could come down every weekend and stay with me. We'd all go out Sat.u.r.day nights, hang together on Sundays-"

"You have to stop. You're getting my hopes up and I don't want to be disappointed."

"Marsh'll hit me up in the halls for the inside scoop on all your favorite things so he can surprise you-"

"I'm serious, Cara, stop. I'll end up writing songs like Nate Wetherill."

"We could all go to prom together!"

"SUC-SUC-SUCCUBUS," Claudia sang, "MYROTTING HEART IS COVERED IN PUS..."

I had to admit the song was catchy. I joined in.

"SUC-SUC-SUCCUBUS," we sang at the top of our lungs, "THE PUTRID CORPSE OF THE TWO OF US."

The night could not possibly have been any better.