One Good Deed Part 15

Peter sat on the sofa, his mother in the chair, both staring at each other. Luka poured the gla.s.ses and handed one to each of them. He sat next to Peter and waited for one of them to break the ice.

"What did you want to say, Mom?" Peter finally asked. "You came all this way."

She took a sip from her gla.s.s. "I know you blame me for a lot of things," she began.

"Mom, growing up I felt as though I didn't exist much of the time. I thought you hated me because of what I thought I'd done to Dad. Now I find out that I didn't shoot Dad and that you knew but didn't tell me, or even talk about it with me." Peter set his gla.s.s on the table without drinking from it. "I daresay Vince felt much the same way. We were left on our own."

"Your father was dead, and I was lost too," she said.

"Yeah, well, you were an adult-we were children who needed you."

Peter's mother reached for a tissue, and Luka wondered what was coming next. She wiped her eyes and sniffed. "Vince told me years ago what happened, and I should have said something, but I didn't realize...."

Peter turned toward him, and Luka gently patted his leg. He knew this was hard for Peter, but Luka thought this was a conversation they both needed to have.

"What happened to Dad was an accident. Yes, Vince and I had been playing with the gun, but we had no idea it was loaded, and when the gun went off...." Peter could still see his father's chest covered with blood. He would probably remember that image for as long as he lived. "But Mom, the only one responsible for Dad's death is Dad. He was the one who kept the loaded gun." Peter saw his mother begin to cry.

"I've been alone for a very long time, and I'm going to die alone," she whispered.

"Mom!" Peter snapped, and Luka started in surprise at the tone. "Believe it or not, this isn't about you. It's about me and Vince. You made us feel guilty for what happened and then checked out. We all needed you, but the only one you seemed to be there for was Julie." Peter paused and took a deep breath, his tone softening. "Look, all that is over. Vince and I are both grown-ups. Vince has a wife and two beautiful daughters. I have Luka and am moving on with my life."

"So you don't need me anymore?" Peter's mother asked, just shy of tears.

"That's the problem, Mom. We haven't needed you for a long time. When you checked out, we couldn't rely on you anyway." Peter paused, and Luka nodded when he glanced at him. He had to go on and see this through. So Luka encouraged him. "Do you remember in high school when I was in the choir and we went on that trip to Was.h.i.+ngton, DC?"

"Yes. You had the best time, and I gave you permission to go." She sounded pleased.

"I did have a great time. But what you didn't know was that the trip cost three hundred dollars and what you don't remember was me mowing every lawn in the neighborhood the entire summer so I could pay for it. I never asked you for the money because I never thought to do that. Even in high school I didn't need you for most things. You'd checked out long before that as far as I was concerned, so I became very self-sufficient. I paid my own way through college, and I'm still paying for it." Peter leaned closer to his mother. "The point I'm making is that I don't need you any longer and haven't in a while. So you have to decide the kind of relations.h.i.+p you want. I'm fine with visiting you on the occasional holidays and seeing you when I get time. But now my life is my own. I've earned that. I'm not going to drop what I'm doing to help you any longer. If you want something, then ask, but don't presume an answer."

"So I'm not your mother anymore." She stood up. "I raised you and gave you a place to live. I cared for you and fed you and...."

"Let me lead a life filled with guilt in order for you to remain in control," Peter said. "So like I was about to say, the past is the past and I forgive you for everything. You are my mother and I do love you. But our relations.h.i.+p from here on out will be based upon mutual respect. So if you want to be close, then it will have to be as equals. As friends, if you will. Because, Mom, there's nothing left at this point."

"Is that what you meant the other week?" she asked, dabbing her eyes.

"Yes. I'm still your son, and you're my mother. But if you want a relations.h.i.+p going forward, then it needs to be on a different basis than the one we've had. Not based on the guilt I carried with me for twenty-five years." Peter stood up and walked over to her. "Mom, this is what I need right now. I can't do things based upon guilt any longer, and neither can Vince." He took her hand. "You need to forgive both of us for what happened... and forgive Dad."

Her lower lip quivered, and Peter knew he might have hit on something important. "All this time we've all a.s.sessed blame and carried guilt over what happened when Vince and I were kids. But it needs to end, for Vince, for you, for me, and for Julie. We all need to move on and forgive each other. Otherwise you'll never be able to move on, and Julie will end up like you."

She gasped, and Luka stood up and quietly left the room. The two of them needed some time alone. In the kitchen, Luka grabbed the bottle of slivovitz and three small gla.s.ses. When he returned to the living room, they weren't talking, just sitting.

"In my family, when we fight and make up, we settle it with a drink," Luka said. He set the gla.s.ses on the coffee table and poured three shots. He handed one to Peter and another to his mother. "Mothers and sons sometimes fight," Luka said. "But in the end you are family, and that is more important." Luka hoped he got the words right. So instead of talking, he lifted his gla.s.s and downed the liquor. Peter did the same, and then Peter's mother lifted the gla.s.s but looked like she didn't know what to do.

"Belt it, Mom," Peter said. She lifted the gla.s.s and drank it all. Her eyes widened and she gasped.

"You want another?" Luka asked, lifting the bottle.

She shook her head.

"Come on, Mom," Peter said.

Luka poured a second round. They all drank and then set down their gla.s.ses, inhaling deeply.

"That better," Luka said, smiling. "Today I get good news." He was trying to change the subject. Luka wasn't sure it would work, but he gave it a try. "I find out that I get to stay."

"Yeah, Mom," Peter said. "We just met with the immigration service, and the short version is that Luka is going to get his green card and will be able to stay."

"That's wonderful," she said, her eyes rolling a little, probably from the alcohol. "You make Peter happy, and that's what every mother loves to see." She picked up the gla.s.s of lemonade and took a large drink. Peter stared open-mouthed at her.

"We are going to dinner to celebrate," Luka said. "We have Serbian food. You come with us." He wasn't sure how Peter would react, but today felt more and more like a party to him. He would get to stay in this country, Peter and his mama were talking to each other, and.... "I get Bella too," he said and got up. He hurried across the lawn and knocked on the back door.

Bella answered it. "You've been drinking," she observed almost as soon as she opened the door.

"Just slivovitz with Peter's mama. We go to dinner and we like you to come too. We celebrate that I get to stay." Luka grinned.

"Okay, but I'll drive. I'm the only one that hasn't been drinking." She sounded almost as excited as Luka felt, and her smile was wonderful to see.

"Okay. We be ready soon," Luka said.

"Fine. I'll get ready, and you can meet me out front in ten minutes."

Luka agreed and hurried back. Peter and his mother were talking. The alcohol had probably smoothed the way. "We ready in ten minutes," he said. He thought about offering another shot to each of them, but put the bottle away instead. He wanted them lubricated, not drunk.

"What's Serbian food like?" Marie asked a few minutes later as they walked across the lawn and out to the front.

"It's wild and spicy, like me," Luka said and then realized how he must have sounded.

"You'll love it, Mom," Peter said as Bella joined them.

They got in the car, and Bella drove them to Serbian Old Towne while Peter called to let them know they were on the way. By the time they arrived, Luka was in high spirits. The music in the restaurant reminded him of home, as did the scents coming from the kitchen. They were shown to a table, and Luka ordered appetizers. He was anxious, hungry, and happy.

"So," Bella began when the conversation seemed to stall from the beginning.

"Bella's going to have a baby," Luka said.

Instantly Marie perked up. "When are you due?" Marie asked.

"Mid-February. I'm only a few months along, but I'm very excited." Bella swallowed, and Luka instantly regretted bring up the subject.

"Mom," Peter said. "Bella lost her husband a few months ago, and...."

Marie reached out to Bella, who was sitting next to her, and took her hand. "I know what you're going through. I really do. It's hard at first, but you'll have a piece of your husband that no one can take away. When I lost my husband, I didn't realize that. In fact, I didn't realize that until recently."

Luka turned to Peter, nodding slowly. Under the table, he found Peter's hand and slid their fingers together. Peter smiled at him, and Luka knew what his mother had said was what Peter needed to hear.

"Who will be with you when the time comes?"

Bella sniffled. "My sister, most likely." She looked at Luka, who nodded. "I'd like it if Luka would be there was well. He's family, and I want my child to have a father. Peter and Luka have been there for me, and I'd be pleased if they'd be in his or her life."

Luka smiled at her. "Of course we be there." He hoped he wasn't out of line speaking for Peter, but the slight squeeze of his hand told him he was just fine.

Their server came, and they ordered drinks and then dinner. Marie wasn't sure what to order, but Bella explained everything. They ended up ordering multiple dishes that got shared around the table so Marie could taste some of everything: the b.u.t.tery, crispy burek; savory, spicy cevaps; tart olives; and mellow peppers. All of it reminded Luka of home and was just what he needed.

"This is wonderful," Marie said more than once during the meal. "Can you make this?" she asked at one point before taking another bite of the flaky-crusted burek. She was looking at Bella, but Luka answered.

"Yes, I can. My mother used to make them all the time. They were a favorite in our house." Luka tried not to get too sentimental. "My mother was very traditional and did not think her son need to know how to cook, but my grandmother was practical. So she convinced my mother that I need to be able to cook if I am on my own. My mother teached me, and I think she liked having me help."

"I think if I ate like this every day, I would weigh a great deal," Marie said. "But I think I'd be happy."

"I am glad you like it," Luka said. Then he raised his gla.s.s, and the others did the same. "I want to drink to my new home with my new friends and family," Luka said. He lightly b.u.mped Peter's shoulder, and Peter did the same thing in return. Then they all drank and continued the meal.

By the time they were finished, all the plates had been cleaned. Luka felt like he'd had a visit home, and Bella appeared stuffed and happy. Even Marie was smiling. Luka paid the check when it was time, and they all got up to leave. Bella took Luka's arm and led him toward the car.

"They need a few minutes to talk," Bella said. Luka had already gotten that idea, and he went with Bella to the car ahead of Peter and his mother.

"Did you mean what you said... about your baby?" Luka asked.

"Yes. I want my baby to know his Uncle Luka and his Uncle Peter." She paused for a few seconds. "You know it was a very nice thing you did for Peter and his mother. And don't tell me you weren't trying to do anything, because I know better. You got them to come to dinner so they could do something fun together."

Luka shrugged.

"You're such a softie," she said.

"I am not," he countered, looking over to where Peter and his mother were talking. "They just needed some time when they weren't mad at each other."

Bella nodded, and they watched as Peter and his mother walked together toward the car. They both had smiles on their faces. Well, maybe not smiles, but they weren't scowling and didn't appear angry. Bella unlocked the car, and they all got inside. Marie sat in the front, and Luka sat in back. Peter took his hand once the doors were closed and they started to move. Luka half listened as Marie spoke with Bella about the trials and joys of motherhood while he scooted closer to Peter and enjoyed being with him. Luka had had enough drama, worry, and excitement to last him the rest of his life.

When they arrived, Bella parked, and everyone got out. Peter's mother said good night and got ready to leave.

"I thought you couldn't drive," Peter said as his mother walked toward her car.

"I got the okay. They took care of the worst eye, and as long as I'm careful, I'm fine. In a few weeks they'll do the other eye and I won't be able to drive again for a while, so I'm enjoying the freedom while I have it." She stepped closer to Peter.

Luka turned away. Bella was already heading up the walk. Luka knew he should do the same, but he wanted to hear what they said.

"Can you ever find it in your heart to forgive me?"

After about ten seconds, Luka headed up the walk, but when he turned, he saw Peter hug his mother, and then she walked to her car and got inside as Peter walked toward him. Luka stood next to Peter and watched her drive away. Then they both strolled through the yard hand in hand back toward his apartment.

Inside, Luka didn't let go of Peter's hand and led him into the living room. They sat on the sofa. Luka pulled Peter to him, kissing him, and nipped at his lips.

"There are so many times when I wonder what I did to deserve you," Peter said.

Luka stroked Peter's stubble-rough cheek. "We do nothing. That is what make love so special. We all do nothing to get it and it make us all very happy. I did not do anything, and you did not do anything. Love just happens."

"Sometimes I think you're a philosopher rather than a scientist," Peter said with a smile.

Luka moved closer and proceeded to kiss away the smile and the rest of what Peter was going to say. As they kissed, their pa.s.sion built quickly.

They moved upstairs, their clothes seeming to melt away. Luka pressed Peter back onto the bed and climbed on top of him. Skin to skin, lips to lips, he reveled in each touch. Luka's entire body tingled with each of Peter's caresses.

"You're mine, Luka," Peter whispered between kisses. "I want you to be my one and only forever. I know you still love Misha, but I hope you can love me the way you loved him."

Luka stilled, gazing down into Peter's eyes. "I will never love you the way I loved Misha. I can't. But I love you for you. He was different."

"Oh," Peter breathed, stilling.

"It not that way. I love you for you. I not love you the way I love Misha because Misha was Misha and you are you." He leaned closer to Peter. "I love you, Peter. I love you for you. Not like Misha. I love you like Peter." He really hoped he was making sense. It was hard for him to explain the contents of his heart. He didn't have the words in either English or Serbian, so instead he proceeded to show Peter.

Luka caressed, licked, and kissed every inch of Peter's body until he was breathless and begging Luka for more. Luka listened and continued driving Peter out of his mind. "I show you how much I love you."

"I think I understand," Peter said, gasping for air.

"No. Not yet," Luka whispered as he reached to the nightstand. He got the supplies and prepared both of them before straddling Peter's hips and sinking down onto him. "Misha is past; you are future," Luka said, gritting his teeth as Peter filled him. "You are who I want in my life."

"And I want you," Peter told him, grasping Luka's sides. "I want only you forever."

"You have me," Luka said. He leaned forward and kissed Peter. They moved together in near perfect harmony. Their mouths hung open and they gasped for breath as their pa.s.sion took over. Luka rolled his hips and drove Peter wild, second after second, minute after minute. He prolonged the culmination of their love for as long as he could, until neither of them could contain it any longer. They climaxed together, shouting their release until the walls echoed it back to them. Luka didn't want to let Peter go, and once their bodies separated, they held each other, whispering their love into the darkness.

They made love for hours, celebrating their love and what Luka hoped was a real relations.h.i.+p well into the night. Finally, well after dark, tired and drained, Peter settled next to Luka. The words Luka heard before drifting into an exhausted sleep were "I love you." Luka muttered his response just before exhaustion claimed him, and they both slept.

Epilogue.

"LUKA!" HE HE heard Peter call up the stairs of the small house he and Peter had started renting together a few weeks before Christmas. In November they had each asked the other if they wanted to move in. Since both their places were small, they decided to find a house they could rent. And three months later things were wonderful. heard Peter call up the stairs of the small house he and Peter had started renting together a few weeks before Christmas. In November they had each asked the other if they wanted to move in. Since both their places were small, they decided to find a house they could rent. And three months later things were wonderful.

"What is it?" Luka called back as he finished b.u.t.toning his s.h.i.+rt. He'd gotten home from work a few minutes earlier and was changing into warm clothes before heading outside to shovel the walks.

"Your phone. It's Bella's sister," Peter said as he strode into the room. "She's gone into labor. Sima says that Bella is moving quickly and could deliver anytime."

Luka moved faster, fastened the final b.u.t.ton, and pulled on his shoes. Then he hurried past Peter and grabbed his wallet and keys from the dresser. He followed Peter down the stairs and got his coat, hat, and gloves. He pulled them on, and the two of them left the house. He locked the door behind them and would have ended up on his back in the snow if Peter hadn't steadied him.

"Take it easy. We'll get there," Peter told him gently. "I don't want anything to happen to you."

They got to the car, and Peter hurried around to the driver's side. Luka huffed. He'd gotten his license a few months earlier, but Peter said he was a menace on the road.

"You can drive when it isn't quite so slippery."

"Fine," Luka said and slid into the pa.s.senger seat. He hadn't gotten a car of his own yet, but he was planning to buy one in the spring. Luka closed the car door, and Peter started the engine. Things in Luka's life-in their their lives-had worked out remarkably well. He'd gotten his green card and his research was progressing very well. He and one of his colleagues were working on a paper together that could put the work they'd been doing on the academic and scientific map. He hadn't had any more visitors from the Serbian government, and he planned to apply to become a citizen as soon as he was able. lives-had worked out remarkably well. He'd gotten his green card and his research was progressing very well. He and one of his colleagues were working on a paper together that could put the work they'd been doing on the academic and scientific map. He hadn't had any more visitors from the Serbian government, and he planned to apply to become a citizen as soon as he was able.

Peter pulled out into traffic, and Luka rested his gloved hand on Peter's leg. "Bella is going to be fine. All of the tests have come back good, with no signs of what the doctor originally feared."

"I know. I do not want her to be alone. We promise we be there for her," Luka said, filled with nervous excitement.