Dude, You're A Fag Part 3

As in many places in the United States, racial divisions in Riverton line up relatively easily with cla.s.s divisions. Darnell grabbed me at lunch one day to point this out to me, using school geography as an example. He sauntered up and whispered in my ear, "Notice the separation? There's the people who hang out in there (pointing toward the cafeteria), the people who hang out in the quad. And then the people who leave." He smashed one hand against the other in frustration: "I talk to these people in cla.s.s. Outside we all separate into our groups. We don't talk to each other. Rich people are not here. They got cars and they go out." He told me that the "ball players" sat in the cafeteria. And he was right: there were two tables at the rear of the cafeteria populated by African American boys on the basketball and football teams, the guys whom Darnell described to me as his "friends." He said there were "people who leave, people who stay and the people over there [in the quad]. The people who stay are ghetto." He added, "Ghetto come to mean 'n.i.g.g.e.rish.' That reflects people who are poor or urban." come to mean 'n.i.g.g.e.rish.' That reflects people who are poor or urban."

Carl and his friend James, both African American basketball players, were also clear about the ways race lined up with cla.s.s at River: "White people always take us to lunch cause black people don't have cars." Because African American boys lacked other indicators of cla.s.s such as cars and the ability to leave campus during lunch, clean expensive basketball shoes took on added symbolic status.

Dancing was another arena that carried distinctly f.a.g-a.s.sociated meanings for white boys but masculine meanings for African American boys who partic.i.p.ated in hip-hop culture. White boys often a.s.sociated dancing with f.a.gs. However, dancing did not carry this sort of s.e.xualized 74 gender meaning for all boys at River High. For African American boys dancing demonstrates members.h.i.+p in a cultural community (Best 2000).

At River, African American boys frequently danced together in single-s.e.x groups, teaching each other the latest dance moves, showing off a particularly difficult move, or making each other laugh with humorous dance moves. In fact, while in drama cla.s.s Liam and Jacob hit each other and joked through the entire dancing exercise, Darnell and Marc seemed very comfortable touching one another. They stood close to one another, heel to toe, as they were supposed to. Their bodies touched, and they gently and gracefully moved the other's arms and head in a way that was tender, not at all like the flailing of the two white boys.

Dancing ability actually increased an African American boy's social status. Students recognized K. J., along with Ricky, as the most talented dancer at the school. K. J. was a soph.o.m.ore of mixed racial descent, originally from the Philippines, who partic.i.p.ated in the hip-hop culture of River High. He continually wore the latest hip-hop fas.h.i.+ons. His dark complexion and identification with hip-hop culture aligned him with many of the African American boys at River High. Girls hollered his name as they walked down the hall and thrust love notes folded in complicated designs into his hands as he sauntered to cla.s.s. For the past two years K. J. had won first place in the talent show for dancing. When he danced at a.s.semblies the auditorium reverberated with screamed chants of "Go K. J.! Go K. J! Go K. J.!" Because dancing for boys of color, especially African American boys, placed them within a tradition of masculinity, they were not at risk of being labeled a f.a.g for engaging in this particular gendered practice. n.o.body called K. J. a f.a.g. In fact, in several of my interviews boys of multiple racial/ethnic backgrounds spoke admiringly of K. J.'s dancing abilities. Marco, a troublemaking white senior, said of K. J., "Did you know he invented the Harlem Shake?" referring to a popular and difficult dance move. Like Ricky, K. J. often ch.o.r.eographed a.s.sembly dance routines. But unlike Ricky, he frequently starred in them at the homecoming and Mr. Cougar rallies.

None of this is to say that partic.i.p.ation in dancing made boys less ho-Dude, You're a f.a.g / 75 mophobic. K. J. himself was deeply h.o.m.ophobic. But like the other boys, it was a gendered h.o.m.ophobia that had to do with masculine gender transgressions as much as s.e.xuality. His sister, for instance, identified as a lesbian, and he looked up to and liked her. But he loathed Ricky. Because of their involvement with dance, the two came into contact relatively frequently. Stylistically, they mirrored one another. Both sported long hair: K. J.'s in cornrows and Ricky's lengthened with highlighted extensions. Both wore elaborate outfits: K. J. favored oversized matching red and white checked shorts and a b.u.t.ton-down s.h.i.+rt over a white tank top, while Ricky sported baggy black pants, combat boots, and a white tank top. Both were thin with delicate facial features and little facial hair.

But the meanings a.s.sociated with what might seem like gender transgressions by both of them were mediated by their racial and s.e.xual ident.i.ties, leading to K. J.'s popularity and Ricky's debas.e.m.e.nt. K. J.'s appearance identified his style as hip-hop, a black, masculine cultural style, whereas Ricky's style identified him as gender transgressive and feminine.

Not surprisingly, K. J. and Ricky were the stars of the dance show at River High. As the day of the show arrived, K. J. asked me for what must have been the hundredth time if I was planning to attend. He said, "Everyone is sayin' that Ricky is my compet.i.tion, but I don't think so.

He's not my compet.i.tion." K. J. continued to tell me that he was very upset with Ricky because the night before at the dress rehearsal Ricky had walked up to him, saying, "Hey, K. J., awesome dance." Ricky had put his hand on K. J.'s back when he said this. Angry and red, K. J. said to me, "I wanted to hit him h.e.l.la bad! Then he came up again. again. I was like 'Oh My G.o.d!' Ugh!" Trying to identify exactly who Ricky was, another boy said, I was like 'Oh My G.o.d!' Ugh!" Trying to identify exactly who Ricky was, another boy said, "I think that's the same guy who is in our history cla.s.s. The guy who looks like a girl?" K. J., wanting to make sure the other boys knew how repulsive Ricky was, said, "You know how you look at girls like they are h.e.l.la fine? That's how he looks at guys, dude! He could be looking at you!" All the boys groaned. K. J. expressed relief that he was "safe," saying Ricky "only checks out white guys." K. J. took pains to differentiate himself from Ricky by saying that Ricky wasn't his compet.i.tion and that Ricky 76 didn't even look at him as a s.e.xual object because of his race. The respect K. J. commanded at River was certainly different from the treatment Ricky received because the meanings a.s.sociated with African American boys and dancing were not the same as the ones a.s.sociated with white boys and dancing. K. J.'s dancing ability and carefully crafted outfits bolstered his popularity with both boys and girls, while Ricky's similar ability and just as carefully chosen outfits placed him, permanently, in a f.a.g position.

None of this is to say that the s.e.xuality of boys of color wasn't policed.

In fact, because African American boys were regarded as so hypers.e.xual, in the few instances I doc.u.mented in which boys were punished for engaging in the f.a.g discourse, African American boys were policed more stringently than white boys. It was as if when they engaged in the f.a.g discourse the gendered insult took on actual combative overtones, unlike the harmless sparring a.s.sociated with white boys' deployments. The intentionality attributed to African American boys in their s.e.xual interactions with girls seemed to occur as well in their deployment of the f.a.g discourse. One morning as I waited with the boys on the asphalt outside the weight room for Coach Ramirez to arrive, I chatted with Kevin and Darrell. The all-male, all-white wrestling team walked by, wearing gold and black singlets. Kevin, an African American soph.o.m.ore, yelled out, "Why are you wearing those f.a.ggot outfits? Do you wear those tights with your b.a.l.l.s hanging out?" The weight-lifting students stopped their fidgeting and turned to watch the scene unfold. The eight or so members of the wrestling team stopped at their SUV and turned to Kevin. A small redhead whipped around and yelled aggressively, "Who said that?!" Fingers from wrestling team members quickly pointed toward Kevin. Kevin, angrily jumping around, yelled back as he thrust his chest out, "Talk about jumping me, n.i.g.g.e.r?" He strutted over, advancing toward the small redhead. A large wrestler sporting a cowboy hat tried to block Kevin's approach. The redhead meanwhile began to jump up and down, as if warm-ing up for a fight. Finally the boy in the cowboy hat pushed Kevin away from the team and they climbed in the truck, while Kevin strutted back to his cla.s.smates, muttering, "All they know how to do is pick somebody Dude, You're a f.a.g / Dude, You're a f.a.g / 77 77 up. Talk about jumping me . . . weak-a.s.s wrestling team. My little bro could wrestle better than any of those motherf.u.c.kers."

It would seem, based on the f.a.g discourse scenarios I've described thus far, that this was, in a sense, a fairly routine deployment of the s.e.xualized and gendered epithet. However, at no other time did I see this insult almost cause a fight. Members of the white wrestling team presumably took it so seriously that they reported the incident to school authorities. This in itself is stunning. Boys called each other f.a.g so frequently in everyday discussion that if it were always reported most boys in the school would be suspended or at least in detention on a regular basis. This was the only time I saw school authorities take action based on what they saw as a s.e.xualized insult. As a result Mr. J. explained that somebody from the wrestling team told him that Kevin was "hara.s.sing"

them. Mr. J. pulled Kevin out of weight-lifting cla.s.s to discuss the incident. According to him, Kevin "kept mouthing off" and it wasn't the first time he had been in trouble, so they decided to expel him and send him to Hillside.

While Kevin apparently had multiple disciplinary problems and this interaction was part of a larger picture, it is important that this was the only time that I heard any boy (apart from Ricky) tattle on another boy for calling him gay or f.a.g . . Similarly it was the only time I saw punishment meted out by the administration. So it seems that, much as in the instance of the Bomb Squad at the Dance Show, intentionality was more frequently attributed to African American boys. They weren't just engaging in the h.o.m.ophobic bantering to which teachers like Mr. Kellogg turned a blind eye or in which Mr. McNally partic.i.p.ated. Rather, they were seen as engaging in actual struggles for dominance by attacking others. Because they were in a precarious economic and social position, the ramifications for African American boys for engaging in the f.a.g discourse were more serious. Precisely because some of them were supposed to be attending, not River High, but the "bad" school, Chicago, in the neighboring school district, when they did encounter trouble their punishment was more severe. Similarly it was the only time I saw punishment meted out by the administration. So it seems that, much as in the instance of the Bomb Squad at the Dance Show, intentionality was more frequently attributed to African American boys. They weren't just engaging in the h.o.m.ophobic bantering to which teachers like Mr. Kellogg turned a blind eye or in which Mr. McNally partic.i.p.ated. Rather, they were seen as engaging in actual struggles for dominance by attacking others. Because they were in a precarious economic and social position, the ramifications for African American boys for engaging in the f.a.g discourse were more serious. Precisely because some of them were supposed to be attending, not River High, but the "bad" school, Chicago, in the neighboring school district, when they did encounter trouble their punishment was more severe.

78 WHERE THE f.a.g DISAPPEARS:.

DR AMA PERFORMANCES.

While, for the most part, a boy's day at River entailed running a gaunt-let of compet.i.tive and ritualized s.e.xual insults, there were two s.p.a.ces of escape-the Gay/Straight Alliance and drama performances. Theater productions were not the same as the drama cla.s.sroom, where I have already indicated that Mr. McNally sometimes drew upon the f.a.g discourse for laughs and to forge rapport with male students. Drama performances typically didn't involve all of the students in drama cla.s.ses.

Rather, students who were involved were ones who identified as drama students and cared about the theater; some of them envisioned trying to make a career out of it. Drama is notoriously a f.a.g s.p.a.ce in high schools.

The ironic result of this connection is that the insult disappears. Not only does the insult disappear, but drama becomes a s.p.a.ce where male students can enact a variety of gender practices.

The opening night of the yearly spring musical ill.u.s.trates how the f.a.g f.a.g insult disappeared and male students enacted a variety of gender practices without negative ramifications. Drama students ran around in various stages of costuming and undress in the backstage area of the River High auditorium as they prepared for the opening night of the spring musical, insult disappeared and male students enacted a variety of gender practices without negative ramifications. Drama students ran around in various stages of costuming and undress in the backstage area of the River High auditorium as they prepared for the opening night of the spring musical, Carousel. Carousel. As the balmy spring air blew through the stage door, I smiled as I thought back to my high school days and felt that same nervous energy as we prepped for choir concerts and musicals like As the balmy spring air blew through the stage door, I smiled as I thought back to my high school days and felt that same nervous energy as we prepped for choir concerts and musicals like Fiddler on Fiddler on the Roof. the Roof. Squealing, giggling, and singing, students frantically searched for spare props, costume parts, and makeup. Students flew past me in clouds of hairspray, carrying parasols or sailor paraphernalia as they readied themselves to perform this relatively dark musical about romantic betrayal, domestic violence, and murder. Squealing, giggling, and singing, students frantically searched for spare props, costume parts, and makeup. Students flew past me in clouds of hairspray, carrying parasols or sailor paraphernalia as they readied themselves to perform this relatively dark musical about romantic betrayal, domestic violence, and murder.

I leaned against the wall outside the dressing rooms as students costumed themselves and each other. Girls quickly and carefully applied makeup under the bright yellow bulbs. Boys lined up waiting for an available girl to apply makeup. I waited for the inevitable f.a.g comment as the Dude, You're a f.a.g / Dude, You're a f.a.g / 79 79 girls plastered rouge, lip gloss, and eye shadow on the boys' faces. Surprisingly, even though all but one of the boys (Brady) partic.i.p.ating in this musical were straight, I heard not a one. Instead Trevor, the handsome blond lead, and the other boys checked out the girls' handiwork in the surrounding mirrors, suggesting slight changes or thanking them for their help. Squealing with delight at their new look, the boys ran back into the beehive of noise and activity that const.i.tuted the backstage area outside the dressing rooms. That reaction and their impromptu singing surprised me as much their pride in sporting makeup. The normally tough and compet.i.tive exterior that they displayed in the rest of the school disappeared, and the boys showed as much excitement as the girls did, smiling and giggling as they antic.i.p.ated their performance.

Soon the backstage area quieted down as students took their marks and the orchestra, really a group of four musicians, played the opening bars. Students danced around the stage, depicting a picnic, a fair, and other tableaus of small-town American life in the 1900s. Remarkably, all the students watched or sang a musical number ent.i.tled "You're a Queer One, Julie Jordan" without cracking a single joke about f.a.gs or h.o.m.os.e.xuality. This refusal to engage in insults, h.o.m.ophobic comments, or s.e.xist joking continued throughout the evening. Conditioned as I was at this point to hearing the f.a.g discourse, I was stunned at the myriad opportunities to levy the epithet and the seeming refusal by all of these boys, gay and straight, to invoke it.

The most striking example of this refusal occurred midway through the play as eight boys dressed as sailors tumbled over each other as they prepared to go on stage. They joked about their lack of "sailorness" as they waited excitedly in the wings. Brady, surveying his fellow soldiers, admonished the boys laughingly to "act like sailors, men!" Jake laughed back in a loud whisper, "Oh yeah, right!" Randy sarcastically said, "We look sooo much like sailors," puffing out his chest and mock-strutting across the stage. The boys all giggled at this performance. They soon gathered around Brady, who, as part of his effort to appear like a tough sailor, had had his friend draw a temporary tattoo on his hairy bicep. It 80 was a truly sailorlike tattoo, a mermaid. But this mermaid was more a visual pun than anything else because she was not a sultry, buxom siren but Ariel from the Disney movie The Little Mermaid. The Little Mermaid. Brady beamed as he showed it off to everyone. The other boys admired the artwork and remarked, with a tinge of jealousy, that it was a great tattoo. They heard their cue and strutted on stage, eventually forming a semicircle and singing: "Blow high, blow low / Away then we will go / We'll go away in the sailin' away / Away we'll go / Blow me high an' low." During the song, boys took their turns performing a short solo dance. Some performed typically masculine moves such as flips or swaggers, while others performed pirouettes or delicate twirls. Brady beamed as he showed it off to everyone. The other boys admired the artwork and remarked, with a tinge of jealousy, that it was a great tattoo. They heard their cue and strutted on stage, eventually forming a semicircle and singing: "Blow high, blow low / Away then we will go / We'll go away in the sailin' away / Away we'll go / Blow me high an' low." During the song, boys took their turns performing a short solo dance. Some performed typically masculine moves such as flips or swaggers, while others performed pirouettes or delicate twirls.

Sailors, in the contemporary United States, are already laden with all sorts of gay innuendo. From the sailor member of the famous gay disco group the Village People to actual sailors stuck on s.h.i.+ps with all-male crews, to jokes about "sea men," sailors represent a subtext of same-s.e.x desire. So a bunch of sailors jumping around singing a song that relies upon the repeated lyrics "blow me" is pretty funny. However, the boys took an approach to this that was, more than anything, simply playful.

Watching this scene unfold, I was surprised that given all of the f.a.g iconography in this moment-sailors, dancing, Disney cartoons, and the repeated singing of the word blow blow (which by itself can get boys joking for hours)-I didn't hear a single invocation of the f.a.g discourse. At the end of the night I turned to David and asked why no one uttered the word (which by itself can get boys joking for hours)-I didn't hear a single invocation of the f.a.g discourse. At the end of the night I turned to David and asked why no one uttered the word f.a.g f.a.g the entire night. He explained, "That's cause we're drama freaks." In a sense, because these boys were near the bottom of the social hierarchy at River High, they were, by default, f.a.gs. But I think the lack of the f.a.g discourse during that evening was a more complicated story. the entire night. He explained, "That's cause we're drama freaks." In a sense, because these boys were near the bottom of the social hierarchy at River High, they were, by default, f.a.gs. But I think the lack of the f.a.g discourse during that evening was a more complicated story.

The boys had fun with the double entendres and played with masculinity. Brady's tattoo functioned as a sort of queering of masculinity in which he visually punned by drawing a mermaid who was not so much s.e.xy as a singing heroine for little girls. The theater is a place for all sorts of experimentation, so why not a metaphorical and physical s.p.a.ce for Dude, You're a f.a.g / Dude, You're a f.a.g / 81 81 gender and s.e.xual experimentation? After watching what boys endured daily at River High, I found this dramatic performance a s.p.a.ce of liberation and relaxation. The boys were able to try on gender ident.i.ties, integrating masculine and feminine gender practices, without fear of being teased. Instead of constantly policing their own and others' gender displays, they were able to be playful, emotional, and creative. It was as if, because they were in a s.p.a.ce where they were all coded as f.a.gs anyway and couldn't be any lower socially, it didn't matter what they did. Such is the liberatory potential of the theater. These boys had nothing left to lose socially, which meant that, ironically, they were free from the pressures of adolescent masculinity, at least temporarily (though it should be noted here that the boys involved in drama productions weren't among the most ardent users of the f.a.g discourse, even outside dramatic performances). What they weren't able to do, however, was to engage in these sorts of playful practices around gender outside the drama performance s.p.a.ce.

REFR AMING h.o.m.oPHOBIA.

h.o.m.ophobia is central to contemporary definitions of adolescent masculinity. Unpacking multilayered meanings that boys deploy through their uses of h.o.m.ophobic language and joking rituals makes clear that it is not just h.o.m.ophobia but a gendered and racialized h.o.m.ophobia. By attending to these meanings, I reframe the discussion as a f.a.g discourse rather than simply labeling it as h.o.m.ophobia. The f.a.g is an "abject" (Butler 1993) position, a position outside masculinity that actually const.i.tutes masculinity. Thus masculinity, in part, becomes the daily interactional work of repudiating the threatening specter of the f.a.g.

The f.a.g extends beyond a static s.e.xual ident.i.ty attached to a gay boy.

Few boys are permanently identified as f.a.gs; most move in and out of f.a.g positions. Looking at f.a.g as a discourse in addition to a static ident.i.ty re-82 veals that the term can be invested with different meanings in different social s.p.a.ces. f.a.g f.a.g may be used as a weapon with which to temporarily a.s.sert one's masculinity by denying it to others. Thus the f.a.g becomes a symbol around which contests of masculinity take place. may be used as a weapon with which to temporarily a.s.sert one's masculinity by denying it to others. Thus the f.a.g becomes a symbol around which contests of masculinity take place.

Researchers who look at the intersection of s.e.xuality and masculinity need to attend to how racialized ident.i.ties may affect how f.a.g f.a.g is deployed and what it means in various social situations. While researchers have addressed the ways in which masculine ident.i.ties are racialized (Bucholtz 1999; Connell 1995; J. Davis 1999; Ferguson 2000; Majors 2001; Price 1999; Ross 1998), they have not paid equal attention to the ways is deployed and what it means in various social situations. While researchers have addressed the ways in which masculine ident.i.ties are racialized (Bucholtz 1999; Connell 1995; J. Davis 1999; Ferguson 2000; Majors 2001; Price 1999; Ross 1998), they have not paid equal attention to the ways f.a.g f.a.g might be a racialized epithet. Looking at when, where, and with what meaning might be a racialized epithet. Looking at when, where, and with what meaning f.a.g f.a.g is deployed provides insight into the processes through which masculinity is defined, contested, and invested in among adolescent boys. is deployed provides insight into the processes through which masculinity is defined, contested, and invested in among adolescent boys.

Ricky demonstrates that the f.a.g ident.i.ty can, but doesn't have to, inhere in a single body. But it seems that he needed to meet two criteria- breaking both gendered and s.e.xual norms-to be const.i.tuted as a f.a.g. He was simultaneously the penetrated f.a.g who threatened psychic chaos (Bersani 1987) and the man who couldn't "throw a football around." Not only could he not "throw a football," but he actively flaunted his unmasculine gender identification by dancing provocatively at school events and wearing cross-gendered clothing. Through his gender practices Ricky embodied the threatening specter of the f.a.g. He bore the weight of the fears and anxieties of the boys in the school who frantically lobbed the f.a.g f.a.g epithet at one another. epithet at one another.

The f.a.g f.a.g epithet, when hurled at other boys, may or may not have explicit s.e.xual meanings, but it always has gendered meanings. When a boy calls another boy a f.a.g, it means he is not a man but not necessarily that he is a h.o.m.os.e.xual. The boys at River High knew that they were not supposed to call h.o.m.os.e.xual boys f.a.gs because that was mean. This, then, has been the limited success of the mainstream gay rights movement. epithet, when hurled at other boys, may or may not have explicit s.e.xual meanings, but it always has gendered meanings. When a boy calls another boy a f.a.g, it means he is not a man but not necessarily that he is a h.o.m.os.e.xual. The boys at River High knew that they were not supposed to call h.o.m.os.e.xual boys f.a.gs because that was mean. This, then, has been the limited success of the mainstream gay rights movement.

The message absorbed by some of these teenage boys was that "gay men can be masculine, just like you." Instead of challenging gender inequal-Dude, You're a f.a.g / 83 ity, this particular discourse of gay rights has reinscribed it. Thus we need to begin to think about how gay men may be in a unique position to challenge gendered as well as s.e.xual norms. The boys in the drama performances show an alternative way to be teenage boys, which is about playing with gender, not just enforcing gender duality based on s.e.xual meanings.

CHAPTER four

Compulsive Heteros.e.xuality

Masculinity and Dominance The weight room, a freestanding module by the football field, stank with a familiar musty smell of old sweat, metal, and rubber. Colorful diagrams of deltoids, biceps, quads, and other muscle groups adorned the walls.

Each day Coach Ramirez, a gentle, soft-spoken man, called roll and told the (mostly male) students to run a lap or two as he entered the module to place his folders in his office and turn on the stereo. After running their laps, the sweaty boys filed in as loud hip-hop music blared from the stereo. Dressed in regulation black gym shorts and T-s.h.i.+rts, boys milled about, picking up weights, completing a few sets, and then moving on to other machines. Some of the African American boys danced to the music, while, inevitably, Josh and his white friends asked for country music.

One fall morning, as some of the boys grew tired of lifting, they gathered around a set of benches in the front of the weight room. Reggie, a white rugby-playing junior, asked the gathering group, "Did you hear about the three 'B's?' " Before anyone had a chance to respond, Reggie announced triumphantly, "b.l.o.w. .j.o.b, back ma.s.sage, and breakfast in bed!" Rich asked skeptically, "Shouldn't the back ma.s.sage come first?"

The conversation soon turned to the upcoming Winter Ball and their prospects for s.e.x with their dates. Jerome complained that he was not 84 Compulsive Heteros.e.xuality / 85 85 "gonna get laid at Winter Ball." Josh admonished, "That's why you gotta go for the younger ones, fool! Like twelve years old!" Reggie, Rich, and Pedro laughed at Josh's advice. Pedro, never quiet for long, told the rest, "If you can put their legs behind their head and eat them out they'll have the fattest o.r.g.a.s.m." The conversation quickly evolved into a game of s.e.xual one-upmans.h.i.+p as Reggie, Rich, Jerome, and Josh began talking over each other, each with a more fantastic story. Josh claimed he was "so good" that he couldn't "control the girl from thras.h.i.+ng around on the bed and hurting herself on the headboard." In response Jerome advised, "That's why you gotta start out at the headboard!" Reggie shouted, "My girlfriend's bed broke!" Rich jumped in with "One time my girlfriend's dad came home while we were doing it and I had to hide in the closet."

Josh, not to be outdone, replied, "Hey man, try getting a b.j. [b.l.o.w. .j.o.b]

while you are driving home!" This challenge was answered by a chorus of groans and "I've done that!"

This sort of locker-room talk is what one expects to find when researching teenage boys and masculinity. Indeed, the public face of male adolescence is filled with representations of masculinity in which boys brag about s.e.xual exploits by showing off a girl's underwear (as in the 1980s film Pretty in Pink Pretty in Pink), spend the end of their senior year talking about how they plan to lose their virginity (American Pie), (American Pie), or make cruel bets about who can bed the ugliest girl in the school or make cruel bets about who can bed the ugliest girl in the school (She's All That). (She's All That). In many ways, the boys at River High seemed much like their celluloid represen-tatives. As this scene in the weight room indicates, heteros.e.xual innuendoes, s.e.xual bravado, and s.e.xual one-upmans.h.i.+p permeated these primarily male s.p.a.ces. This chapter looks at these gender practices and, instead of taking them at face value as testosterone-fueled verbal jockeying, pays attention to the meanings of masculinity embedded in them. In these sorts of interactions and gendered s.p.a.ces, masculinity, in spite of boys' talk about the gay boys' ability to be masculine as discussed in the previous chapter, is a.s.sumed to be synonymous with heteros.e.xuality. But, as they do when invoking the f.a.g discourse, boys talking about heteros.e.xuality are and are not talking about s.e.x. Their talk about heteros.e.xu-86 / In many ways, the boys at River High seemed much like their celluloid represen-tatives. As this scene in the weight room indicates, heteros.e.xual innuendoes, s.e.xual bravado, and s.e.xual one-upmans.h.i.+p permeated these primarily male s.p.a.ces. This chapter looks at these gender practices and, instead of taking them at face value as testosterone-fueled verbal jockeying, pays attention to the meanings of masculinity embedded in them. In these sorts of interactions and gendered s.p.a.ces, masculinity, in spite of boys' talk about the gay boys' ability to be masculine as discussed in the previous chapter, is a.s.sumed to be synonymous with heteros.e.xuality. But, as they do when invoking the f.a.g discourse, boys talking about heteros.e.xuality are and are not talking about s.e.x. Their talk about heteros.e.xu-86 ality reveals less about s.e.xual orientation and desire than it does about the centrality of the ability to exercise mastery and dominance literally or fig-uratively over girls' bodies (Wood 1984). These heteros.e.xually based gender practices serve to defend boys against emasculating insults like those in the f.a.g discourse (Hird and Jackson 2001). Engaging in very public practices of heteros.e.xuality, boys affirm much more than just masculinity; they affirm subjecthood and personhood through s.e.xualized interactions in which they indicate to themselves and others that they have the ability to work their will upon the world around them. Imposing one's will and demonstrating dominance in this way aligns boys with personhood and subjectivity, historically coded as masculine ( Jaggar 1983; Mackinnon 1982). Demonstrating dominance in a variety of ways is a central part of contemporary American masculinity (Peirce 1995).

Compulsive heteros.e.xuality 1 is the name I give to this constellation of s.e.xualized practices, discourses, and interactions. This term builds on Adrienne Rich's (1986) influential concept of "compulsory heteros.e.xuality."2 Rich argues that heteros.e.xuality not only describes s.e.xual desires, practices and orientations but is a "political inst.i.tution" (23). The "enforcement of heteros.e.xuality for women as a means of a.s.suring male right of physical, economic and emotional access" (50) is a central component of gender inequality. The microprocesses of heteros.e.xuality as an inst.i.tution are so embedded in daily life that, while heteros.e.xuality may be personally meaningful, it can simultaneously function as an oppressive social inst.i.tution. While compulsory heteros.e.xuality may regulate both men and women, "their experiences of it and the power and privilege that accompany it are different" (V. Robinson 1996, 120). 1 is the name I give to this constellation of s.e.xualized practices, discourses, and interactions. This term builds on Adrienne Rich's (1986) influential concept of "compulsory heteros.e.xuality."2 Rich argues that heteros.e.xuality not only describes s.e.xual desires, practices and orientations but is a "political inst.i.tution" (23). The "enforcement of heteros.e.xuality for women as a means of a.s.suring male right of physical, economic and emotional access" (50) is a central component of gender inequality. The microprocesses of heteros.e.xuality as an inst.i.tution are so embedded in daily life that, while heteros.e.xuality may be personally meaningful, it can simultaneously function as an oppressive social inst.i.tution. While compulsory heteros.e.xuality may regulate both men and women, "their experiences of it and the power and privilege that accompany it are different" (V. Robinson 1996, 120).

Practices of "compulsive heteros.e.xuality" exemplify what Butler (1995) calls "gender performativity," in which gender "is produced as a ritualized repet.i.tion of conventions, and . . . this ritual is socially compelled in part by the force of a compulsory heteros.e.xuality" (31). Compulsive heteros.e.xuality is not about desire for s.e.xual pleasure per se, or just about desire to be "one of the guys"; rather, it is "an excitement felt as s.e.xuality in a male supremacist culture which eroticizes male dominance and female Compulsive Heteros.e.xuality / Compulsive Heteros.e.xuality / 87 87 submission" ( Jeffreys 1998, 75). Indeed, ensuring positions of power entails boys' constant "recreation of masculinity and femininity" through rituals of eroticized dominance ( Jeffreys 1998, 77). Looking at boys' ritualistic s.e.x talk, patterns of touch, and games of "getting girls" indicates how this gender inequality is reinforced through everyday interactions.

Taken together, these ritualized interactions continually affirm masculinity as mastery and dominance. By symbolically or physically mastering girls' bodies and s.e.xuality, boys at River High claim masculine ident.i.ties.

A STUD WITH THE LADIES.

Not surprisingly, the most popular boys at River High are heteros.e.xual.

Expressing heteros.e.xual desire establishes a sort of baseline masculinity.

Bradley, a charming blond, blue-eyed soph.o.m.ore who could hardly contain his excitement about being interviewed, explained, "To be the coolest guy? If you're just like a stud at sports and you're a stud with the ladies." If anyone at River High was a "stud at sports" and a "stud with the ladies," it was Chad, a tall, well-muscled, strikingly good-looking senior football player of mixed white and Latino heritage. Chad spent much of his interview describing how he was "that guy" on campus: "I'm Chad Rodgers. I play football. I'm going to college. All that kind of s.h.i.+t. Bad-a.s.s, you know?" He said that because of this, other guys were envious of him. When I asked him why this was the case, he answered confidently, with a bit of a sneer, "Probably 'cause they can't get girls. I work out. I got muscles and a nice body." In her interview, Cathy confirmed Chad's view of himself, saying, with admiration, "Chad? He's a big, c.o.c.ky man.

But he deserves the right to be c.o.c.ky. He is really really hot. But he knows it. hot. But he knows it.

That's just Chad. He just thinks the world revolves around him." Indeed, after interviewing him, I received the same impression of Chad.

Chad told me that he, along with some of his football teammates, frequently teased another teammate: "This dude, Dax Reynolds, he gets made fun of a lot 'cause he's always holding his girlfriend's hand. To the other guys it's funny. We just make fun of him." According to Chad, a 88 successful s.e.x life was more important than public displays of affection.

If a guy wasn't having s.e.x, "he's no one. He's n.o.body." Chad explained that some guys tried to look cool by lying about s.e.x, but they "look like a clown, [they get] made fun of." He a.s.sured me, however, that he was not one of those "clowns" forced to lie about s.e.x, bragging, "When I was growin' up I I started having s.e.x in the eighth grade." However, his description of these s.e.xual adventures sounded scarily close to date rape. started having s.e.x in the eighth grade." However, his description of these s.e.xual adventures sounded scarily close to date rape.

He told me, "The majority of the girls in eighth and ninth grade were just stupid. We already knew what we were doing. They didn't know what they were doing, you know?" When I asked him to explain this, he continued, "Like say, comin' over to our house like past 12:00. What else do you do past 12:00? Say we had a bottle of alcohol or something. I'm not saying we forced it upon them. I'm sayin' . . . " He trailed off here as he tried to explain that he didn't need to actually rape girls, though his friends did: "Kevin Goldsmith and uh, Calvin Johnson, they got charged with rape." Chad a.s.sured me that in spite of his statement that he had used alcohol with underage girls he had never had to force a girl to have s.e.x: "I'll never [be in] that predicament, you know. I've never had a hard time, or had to, you know, alter their thinking."

Other boys echoed Chad's a.s.sertions about the importance of s.e.x, saying that they felt the pressure to have s.e.x, or at least act like they were having s.e.x. Connor, a white junior who frequently wore Harley Davidson insignia T-s.h.i.+rts and a black leather jacket, suggested that s.e.x was important to maintain one's image: If his friends are talking about it [s.e.x] and they got some and this guy is like "oh man, they're cool and I wanna be cool." So they go and do whatever as far as prost.i.tution or actually drugging a girl or whatever.

As far as image goes-yeah, they think it's [s.e.x] important.

Angela told me that one of her male friends was so desperate to be seen as s.e.xually experienced that he lied about it: They brag about it. They lie about it. I noticed a lot of guys lie about it. Like that guy I like. He's my best friend now, one of them. And he Compulsive Heteros.e.xuality / Compulsive Heteros.e.xuality / 89 89 messed around with one of my friends before me and him started talking. He told people at football camp that they had s.e.x. But he told me he was still a virgin. He was like, bragging about it. I asked him, "Are you still a virgin?" All of his other close friends were like, "Yeah. He's still a virgin." I said, "Why did you lie about it?" He was like, "I just wanted people to think I was cool."

Ben concurred with this a.n.a.lysis: "Of course they lie about it . . . It's like, tell your friends, 'Last night it was good.' And then the girl walks up and they talk about something else. You know how it is."

The way boys talked about heteros.e.xual practices and orientations in their interviews reveals that their public s.e.xuality was as much about securing a masculine social position as it was about expressions of desire or emotion. David explicitly talked about this "image" problem as one of "peer pressure," saying, "If you haven't scored with someone, then you are not adequate to anyone else, you know?"

In this sense, Chad was both an exemplar and an arbiter of heteros.e.xuality. Like other boys, he recognized only specific expressions of heteros.e.xuality as masculine. In groups boys act as a sort of "s.e.xual police"

(Hird and Jackson 2001), deriding each other's expressions of love, romance, or emotional desire, such as Dax's holding of his girlfriend's hand.

Chad also had the ability to discern whether other guys were lying about their s.e.xual activities. It seems that lying about it might actually make one less masculine than simply not engaging in it! Finally, as noted by Cathy and Chad himself, Chad was the paragon of masculinity at River High. He was "really hot" and "muscular" and could "get girls" when other guys couldn't.

If boys couldn't actually bed a girl, they had to at least act as if they were s.e.xually attracted to girls. Jace told me that guys who weren't interested in girls were "all gay guys." Indeed, Gary confirmed that having a girlfriend served as proof of heteros.e.xuality. I asked Gary, a white senior with spiky burgundy hair and a smartly a.s.sembled Abercrombie and Fitch outfit who was involved in drama and choir, "Is it important that guys have girlfriends?" He explained, 90 Probably. Yeah. It shows you're a man. I think it's important. Let's say the top actor guy who everybody thought was gay had a really nice girlfriend. That might happen just for a cover-up so that guy can be left alone from the stereotypes and the teasing. I think it may be important to some people just so they can go through high school without wor-rying about anybody talking about them.

Girlfriends both protected boys from the specter of the f.a.g and bolstered their masculinity. In fact, in the "Revenge of the Nerds" skit discussed in the introduction, the deciding factor in the nerds' ascendance to masculinity was their ability to reclaim "their" girlfriends.

Not surprisingly, given Chad's comment that if a guy hadn't had s.e.x he was no one, boys felt pressured to make sure others knew that they thought about s.e.x. In fact, thinking about s.e.x was so important that boys often named it (much like h.o.m.ophobia) as a defining facet of adolescent masculinity. Connor explained this in response to my question "How would you describe teenage guys?"

I do do think it's true for 99.9 percent of the guys that they think about girls every 5.2 seconds . . . Every time they think of a girl they think of something s.e.xually. Like every time they see a girl they look at her a.s.s or whatever. Guys are into girls. think it's true for 99.9 percent of the guys that they think about girls every 5.2 seconds . . . Every time they think of a girl they think of something s.e.xually. Like every time they see a girl they look at her a.s.s or whatever. Guys are into girls.

Connor's comments reflected what many boys at River told me, that teenage guys think about s.e.x all of the time. What Connor left out was that boys not only thought about girls "every 5.2 seconds" but constantly, compulsively expressed this thought process. Like Connor, Tal, a slim white undercla.s.sman, also positioned thinking about s.e.x as a defining aspect of teen masculinity. As we walked out of the weight room one day, I asked if there was anything he'd like me to include in my notes. He replied, "I got something for you! All guys think about is eating p.u.s.s.y twenty-four-seven!"

At River High, s.e.x, thinking about s.e.x, and talking about s.e.x were framed repeatedly as specifically masculine concerns, even in the cla.s.sroom. In drama cla.s.s Mr. McNally was walking the cla.s.s through the dif-Compulsive Heteros.e.xuality / 91 ferent components of a story-the introduction, the buildup, and then the climax. A boy in the back of the cla.s.s yelled out, "Climax! Every guy knows what that is!" The cla.s.s laughed. While girls might have thought about it, enjoyed it, and even desired it, s.e.x tended to be marked as a male domain.

Heath, a tall, white attractive junior involved in the drama program who was known for his unique clothing style, told me that this sort of behavior was expected of boys; teenage guys were supposed to be "more outspoken about s.e.xual stuff and hollering at girls and all that stuff." Darren identified auto shop as a particularly masculine arena rife with s.e.xual discussions, explaining, "Auto shop cla.s.s is a stereotype. Very typical teenage guys. All they ever talk about is s.e.x and cars . . . i t seems like s.e.x always comes up." Jose told me something similar: "Most guys want a girl for a night and that's it. That's all it is over here. They're just looking for a girl and then they'll just forget about it the next day and then go onto something else." He told me that his friend was one of those guys: Some guys kind of put it in their [girls'] minds that they're going to be with them and then the next day they won't call them. Like I know a guy [who is] especially good at that. He's one of my best friends. He can pull out a phone book and be like, "Who do I want to talk to tonight?" Then he'll be with them for the night. He's just a guy and he just wants as many girls as he can. Just wants girls, I guess.

For the most part boys seemed to be proud of this stereotypical "love 'em and leave 'em" behavior. While seemingly promiscuous girls were quickly and shamefully labeled s.l.u.t, s.l.u.t, boys proudly donned the moniker of boys proudly donned the moniker of male wh.o.r.e. male wh.o.r.e. One of my interviewees, John, laughingly described his friend as "a male wh.o.r.e. Guys just don't care! Like my friend, Jeff-a male wh.o.r.e. I swear to G.o.d, that guy!" I asked, surprised, "He's proud?" One of my interviewees, John, laughingly described his friend as "a male wh.o.r.e. Guys just don't care! Like my friend, Jeff-a male wh.o.r.e. I swear to G.o.d, that guy!" I asked, surprised, "He's proud?"

John answered, "Oh yeah! He's proud!" Similarly Heath told me that "double standards" applied to girl and boy s.e.xual behaviors: if a "guy sleeps around, he's the man. Girl sleeps around, oh, she's a s.l.u.t. It's weird.

I don't know why."

92 Sadly, it seems that for all the feminist activism of the past several decades little has changed in the day-to-day public s.e.xual practices and discourses of adolescent boys. Boys still look to "score," and girls' bodies still serve as proof of masculinity. Girls who have s.e.x are still labeled s.l.u.ts, and boys who have s.e.x are still vaulted to popularity.

GETTING GIRLS.

Chad sneered at boys who, unlike him, couldn't "get girls." Getting girls, like the "girl watching" doc.u.mented by Beth Quinn (2002), "functions as a game men play to build shared masculine ident.i.ties and social relations" (387). Boys who couldn't engage in this game of "getting girls" lost masculine capital. School rituals such as the homecoming a.s.sembly mirrored Chad's derision of boys who failed to play at "getting girls." At the Homecoming a.s.sembly two boys, Lamar and Tonio, stood in front of the cheering student body, lip-synching a comedy routine between Chris Rock and Michael Jackson.3 Leering and pointing at two attractive girls clad in hip-high leather boots, black miniskirts, and white tank tops walking across the stage, the two boys pulled each other aside. Lamar, as Chris Rock, dared Tonio, as Jackson, to "get a girl." They paced back and forth in front of the girls, "Chris Rock" saying, "That girl! Oh man!"

"Michael Jackson" responded in a high-pitched voice, "Goodness gracious! She is too fine!" "Rock" agreed, "She sho' is fine!" "Rock" turned to "Jackson," challenging him, "You can't get that girl!" "Jackson" responded defensively, in a high voice, "I can can get her!" Again "Rock" challenged him, "I get her!" Again "Rock" challenged him, "I bet bet you can't get that girl! Michael, you are going to Neverland again!" The students roared in laughter as the two boys strutted back to "get" the girls. you can't get that girl! Michael, you are going to Neverland again!" The students roared in laughter as the two boys strutted back to "get" the girls.

The ritual of "getting girls" played out in this homecoming skit ill.u.s.trates one of the ways compulsive heteros.e.xuality becomes a part of boys'

friends.h.i.+ps and interactional styles. "Rock" and "Jackson," like boys at River High, jokingly challenged each other to dominate-or, in their words, to "get"-a girl. In these rituals girls' bodies functioned as a sym-Compulsive Heteros.e.xuality / 93 bol of male heteros.e.xuality and tangible evidence of repudiation of same s.e.x-desire (Butler 1999). That is, if boys desired girls, then they couldn't possibly desire each other.

Both of the Mr. Cougar sketches I have outlined thus far involved stories of getting girls. In each one the victorious pair of boys was rewarded with girls as confirmation of their dominance. When Brent and Greg defeated the "gangstas," they were rewarded with "their girls,"

and when Freddy and Randy, as River High wrestlers, defeated their wrestling foes, the "dancing girls" ripped off their s.h.i.+rts to reveal a color pattern that symbolically linked them to Freddy and Randy. Rituals of getting girls allowed boys to find common ground in affirming each other's masculinity and positioned them as subjects who had a right to control what girls did with their bodies. A close examination indicates that rituals of "getting girls" relied on a threat of s.e.xualized violence that reaffirmed a s.e.xualized inequality central to the gender order at River High.

On Halloween, Heath arrived at school dressed as an elf carrying a sprig of mistletoe and engaged in a fairly typical ritual of getting girls. He told anyone who would listen that an elf costume was a brilliant idea for Halloween because "it's the wrong holiday!" We stood by his friends at the "water polo" table who tried to sell greeting cards as a fundraiser for the team. Heath attempted to "help" by yelling at girls who pa.s.sed by, "Ten dollars for a card and a kiss from the elf! Girls only!" Girls made faces and rolled their eyes as they walked past. Graham walked up and Heath yelled to him, arms outstretched, "Come here, baby!" Graham walked toward him with his hips thrust forward and his arms open, saying, "I'm coming!" and quickly both of them backed away laughing.

Graham challenged Heath's kissing strategy, saying that the mistletoe sticking out of his green shorts wouldn't work because it wasn't Christmas. Heath, to prove his point that mistletoe worked at any time of the year, lifted the mistletoe above his head and, moving from behind the table, walked up to a group of girls. They looked at him with a bit of trep-idation and tried to ignore his presence. Finally one acquiesced, giving 94 him a peck on the cheek. Her friend followed suit. Heath strutted back to the table and victoriously shook hands with all the boys.

Heath, in this instance, became successfully masculine both through renouncing the f.a.g-he emphasized he was kissing "girls only," he imitated a f.a.g by coming on to Graham-and through "getting girls" to kiss him.4 Graham then congratulated Heath on his ability to overcome the girls' resistance to his overtures. This sort of coercion, even when seemingly harmless, embeds a sense of masculinity predicated upon an overcoming of girls' resistance to boys' desire (Hird and Jackson 2001). Indeed, if one of the important parts of being masculine, as stated by the boys earlier, was not just to desire girls, which Heath indicated through his "girls only" admonition, but also to be desired by girls, Heath demonstrated this in a quite public way, thus ensuring a claim, at least for a moment, on heteros.e.xuality.

While the boys laughed and celebrated Heath's triumph of will, the girls may not have had the same reaction to his forced kisses. In a study of teenagers and s.e.xual hara.s.sment, Jean Hand and Laura Sanchez (2000) found, not surprisingly, that in high school girls experienced higher levels of s.e.xual hara.s.sment than boys did and were affected more seriously by it. The girls in their study described a hierarchy of s.e.xually hara.s.sing behaviors in which some behaviors were described as more problematic than others. The girls overwhelmingly indicated that being kissed against their will was the worst form of s.e.xual hara.s.sment, rated more seriously than hearing boys' comments about their bodies or receiving other types of unwanted s.e.xual attention.

Of course, it is unlikely that boys, or girls, would recognize these sorts of daily rituals as s.e.xual hara.s.sment; they are more likely seen as normal, if perhaps a bit aggressive, instances of heteros.e.xual flirtation and as part of a normal adolescence (N. Stein 2005).5 In fact, I never saw a teacher at River recognize these seemingly flirtatious interchanges as hara.s.sment. In auto shop, Tammy, the only girl, often faced this sort of hara.s.sment, often at the hands of Jay, a stringy-haired white junior with a pimpled face. One afternoon he walked up to Tammy and stood behind Compulsive Heteros.e.xuality / Compulsive Heteros.e.xuality / 95 95 her deeply inhaling, his nose not even an inch away from her hair. Clearly uncomfortable with this, she moved to the side. He asked her if she was planning to attend WyoTech (Wyoming Technical College, a mechanic school), and she responded, "Yes." He said, "I'm going too! You and me.

We're gonna be in a room together." He closed his eyes and started thrusting his hips back and forth and softly moaning as if to indicate that he was having s.e.x. Tammy said, "Shut up" and walked away. Used to this sort of hara.s.sment, she had developed a way of dealing with such behavior. But no matter how many times she dismissed him, Jay continued to pepper her with s.e.xual innuendoes and suggestive practices.

Both Jay's and Heath's behaviors show how heteros.e.xuality is normalized as a sort of "predatory" social relation in which boys try and try and try to "get" a girl until one finally gives in. Boys, like Jay, who can't "get" a girl often respond with anger or frustration because of their presumed right to girls' bodies. Marc reacted this way when a girl didn't acknowledge his advances. As usual, he sat in the rear of the drama cla.s.sroom with his pal Jason. A tall, attractive blonde girl walked into the room to speak to Mr. McNally, the drama teacher. As she turned to leave the cla.s.s, Marc, leaning back with his legs up on the chair in front of him and his arm draped casually over the seat next to him, yelled across the room, "See you later, hot mama!" Jason, quickly echoed him, yelling "See you later, sweet thing." She didn't acknowledge them and looked straight ahead at the door as she left. Marc, frustrated at her lack of response, loudly stated, "She didn't hear me. Wh.o.r.e." Instead of acknowledging that not getting her reflected something about his gender status, he deflected the blame onto her. In fact, he transformed her into the female version of the f.a.g: the wh.o.r.e.6 Getting, or not getting, girls also reflects and reinforces racialized meanings of s.e.xuality and masculinity. Darnell, the African American and white football player who, in chapter 3, talked about how boys were told from a young age to avoid becoming a f.a.g, made it clear that this sort of rejection was embedded with racialized meanings: pacing up and down the stairs that line the drama cla.s.sroom, he yelled across the room to me.

96 "There's just one thing I hate! Just one thing I hate!" Shawna, an energetic, bis.e.xual African American soph.o.m.ore, and I simultaneously asked, "What's that?" Darnell responded, frustrated, "When mixed girls date white guys! Mixed girls are for me!" Shawna attempted to interrupt his rant, saying, "What if the girl doesn't want to date you? Girls have a say too." Darnell responded, not in as much jest as one might hope, "No they don't. White boys can date white girls. There's plenty of 'em. They can even date black girls. But mixed girls are for me." Darnell's frustration reflects a way in which racialized, gendered, and s.e.xual ident.i.ties intersect.

While he felt that he had a claim on "getting girls," as a "mixed" guy he saw his options as somewhat limited. Girls and girls' bodies were constructed as a limited resource for which he had to compete with other (white) guys.

TOUCHING.

Just as same-s.e.x touching puts boys at risk for becoming a f.a.g, cross-s.e.x touching affirms heteros.e.xuality and masculinity. "The use of touch (especially between the s.e.xes)" maintains a "social hierarchy" (Henley 1977, 5). In general, superiors touch subordinates, invade their s.p.a.ce, and interrupt them in a way that subordinates do not do to superiors. At River High masculinity was established through gendered rituals of touch involving boys' physical dominance and girls' submission.

Girls and boys regularly touched each other in a way that boys did not touch other boys. While girls touched other girls across social environments, boys usually touched each other in rule-bound environments (such as sports) or as a joke to imitate f.a.gs. While boys and girls both partic.i.p.ated in cross-s.e.x touching, it had different gender meanings. For girls, touching boys was part of a continuum of cross-s.e.x and same-s.e.x touching. That is, girls touched, hugged, and linked arms with other girls on a regular basis in a way that boys did not. For boys, cross-s.e.x touching often took the form of a ritualistic power play that embedded gender meanings of boys as powerful and girls as submissive, or at least weak in Compulsive Heteros.e.xuality / Compulsive Heteros.e.xuality / 97 97 their attempts to resist the touching. Touching, in this sense, becomes a "kinesic gender marker" producing masculinity as dominance and femininity as submission (Henley 1977, 138).

At River High boys and girls constantly touched each other as part of daily interaction, communication, and flirtation. In many instances cross-s.e.x touching was lightly flirtatious and reciprocal. In auto shop Brian, a tall white senior, wrapped his arms around Cara, a skinny, white soph.o.m.ore, who had wandered in to watch the boys work on a car. She said to him, "Let me feel your muscles."7 Brian responded proudly, "Check out these guns!" As he flexed his arms Cara wrapped her hand around his biceps, laughing and teasing: "Those aren't muscles! I can still squeeze it!" Brian, indignant, responded, "Let me feel yours." The thin girl made her best attempt at flexing her muscles. Grabbing her arms, Brian laughed at her nonexistent biceps, as did Cara. In this instance the touching was reciprocal and lighthearted, though still infused with normative notions of boys as muscular and girls as weak. Brian and Cara touched each other equally, they didn't struggle for control of the situation, and the interaction was not overtly compet.i.tive (though a hint of violence hid under the surface of the interaction, as Brian's strength and Cara's weakness were affirmed).

Like rituals of getting girls, touching rituals ranged from playfully flirtatious to a.s.saultlike interactions. Teachers at River never intervened, at least as far as I saw, when these touching interactions turned slightly violent. In her study of s.e.x education practices in high school, Bonnie Trudell (1993) noted that teachers don't or won't differentiate between s.e.xualized horseplay and a.s.sault among students. I also never saw administrators intervene to stop what were seemingly clear violations of girls' bodies. While these sorts of touching interactions often began as flirtatious teasing, they usually evolved into a compet.i.tion that ended with the boy triumphant and the girl yelling out some sort of metaphorical "uncle."

Darnell and Christina, for instance, engaged in a typical touching ritual during a morning drama cla.s.s. The students had moved into the au-98 ditorium, where they were supposed to be rehearsing their scenes.